Wednesday, January 03, 2007

So, a pimp's job is to make sure his girls are out there earning. Making Daddy enough money so he can have everything he wants. Cars, houses, vacations, and of course the bling. As an added bonus he gets a little somethin somethin whenever he feels like it. As far as I can tell, the only real difference between Joe "I used to be a preacher" Simpson and a pimp is that the sumthin sumthin is probably done vicariously and a pimp dresses better. I guess Joe had a few Christmas bills to pay because he was pissed that he is not getting his money from his girls (well at least in this case Jessica) Do you notice that Ashlee really does not seem to take much crap from Daddy. Maybe she fought back and that is what happened to her nose. Anyway, it looks kind of Culkinish for Joe to be making his little girl work so hard.

The Hypothetical conversation going on in Justin Timberlake's mind----

When you stop looking like Britney by coloring your hair black, and then tell me your idea of a great girl fling is Pam Anderson instead of someone I might actually think is hot I get upset. But really the last straw was saying you needed to have sex every night when you know I only give it to you once a week. So, now that Britney and I need some positive publicity we can make this world rock by getting back together or maybe I will just take my shot at the person who cannot be named for two weeks or that Lindsay Lohan. Hey even Lance looks cuter than you now. So it is over Cameron. Over.



There are two things wrong with the following story. First I think Ryan Phillippe is just having a fine time being away from Reese Witherspoon and has no plans to get back together with her anytime soon. Second. Can you honestly see Jake Gyllenhaal and Reese together? The only way that is possible if it were as a beard and bearder. Come on. At least say she was having a fling with a gaffer or the craft service guy. Something that would make more sense. This Liza Minelli David Gest thing they are suggesting is just so not right.





Evangeline Lilly wants to go back to doing sex line commercials. She wants to be an actress but is very private and does not want to be recognized by the public. Well would you rather be recognized for being on a hit television show or "hey aren't you that girl from 976-DATE? Do you think you and a couple of your friends could come over now? I got like $50. I would have more but Jess has not been working lately."



You too can have Whitney Houston's used panties. Before now only the rich and famous and those on Celebrity Big Brother UK could have the chance to own some of her used clothes. (No one wanted them after Marilyn and Gavin wore them) No word on whether they were the pair being worn when Bobby had to help her. Well you know. No, I know you remember if you watched the show and really cannot tell you if you did not.


I think we should bet on which Madden relationship will last longer. Nicole Richie and Joel Madden or Sophie Monk and Benji Madden. To me Joel has already shown he can handle adversity and the snickers from his fans so we know he is tough and tested. Plus as long as he can keep Nicole above 85 pounds or so, she should be there for him. As for Sophie and Benji. Maybe she is getting back at her parents? I just have not seen the track record from Benji and so I am going to say Sophie and Benji will break up first.

P.S. For those of you in the UK. I know Celeb Big Brother starts in a few hours so let me know who the celebs are please.

27 comments:

Pinky said...

EntL - your post about Evangeline Lily is hysterical: "hey aren't you that girl from 976-DATE? Do you think you and a couple of your friends could come over now? I got like $50. I would have more but Jess has not been working lately."
Really gave me a chuckle this morning, thanks.

I am wondering what a "bearder" is though...

Anonymous said...

lmao at the E.Lilly and Joe spin...wonder how many of those numbers are in is little black bible..opps I meant book. :)

Unknown said...

We need a little update on Brit ;)

Anonymous said...

Who's the 'person that cannot be named for 2 weeks' in the Justin bit???

If he gets back wid Brit Brit I'll jus die:(

I know she's a friend but now is not the time for her babysitting another 'kid'. She should stay off the hot n heavy til she's back on top again.

UKGrrl

Anonymous said...

The only way that Jake would be interested in Reese is if she had a penis.

Anonymous said...

EntL: you are sounding sooooo bitchy lately.

And I LOVE IT - Keep it up!

Unknown said...

Ukgrrl,

EL has resolved not to mention Ms. Mittenfart until after January 15 ;)

Anonymous said...

Ever since Evangeline Lilly got her big break on Lost, I've been watching all the other chickies doing ads for the same phone date line (called "Live Links"), wondering which one of them is gonna be discovered next. I'm sure they're all thinking exactly the same thing!

Anonymous said...

This was a great post!! Love the bitchy tone!

PS--Lance has always looked better than Cameron.

Pinky--a beard is the straight person with the gay person, so the bearder must be the gay person.

Anonymous said...

For reals, I hope Jakey has a nice man.

Justin and Cam, ah the end of an era. Or is it?

Anonymous said...

Defamer and Page Six are saying that Brit's "checked in" to Sanctuary spa in Arizona for some rest, relaxation and [unconfirmed] rehab?

I don't know about y'all, but after a rather jam-packed holiday season, a spa visit is sounding mighty good about now.

After the hilarious SNL "Dick in a Box" and the major success of JT's album, he's pretty white hot right now... My guess is he'll find a new girl that isn't any of the ones Ent mentioned.

Pinky said...

Thanks, WTF (love your name by the way;). That bearder thing just seems so odd - like he was trying to say something about Reese (that didn't refer to pilfering shoes.) Guess I'm a little blonder than usual today.

Anonymous said...

All very amusing items this morning; I've been giggling over my morning tea.

Dano.

Anonymous said...

When are you going to reveal who "L" is as promised? :(

Anonymous said...

Justin will soon be seen with Scarlett Johanssen. Mark my words.

DC

Amber said...

I thought Justin Timberlake was dating some real estate chick. Yes? No? I am determined to find out before the 2 week date!

Amber said...

Okay, so I just remembered that Cameron Diaz was at the SNL show.. which was 2 weeks ago. So either this break-up stuff is completely false or they broke up less than two weeks ago and he's already dating someone else.

Anonymous said...

celebrity big brother contestants. . .

http://www.itv.com/news/entertainment_d2501dc64006ac405538484d1c715277.html

Anonymous said...

Female First: Although Ryan desperately wants to give his marriage another go, Reese has allegedly been growing close to Jake Gyllenhaal on the set of their new film 'Rendition'.

An on-set source said: "Jake stopped by her trailer and waited for her. They laughed and talked, then he left."



Umm, 'laugh, talk, leave' constitutes 'growing close'? Jesus wept. Who writes this crap, lol?

You can bet the truth is not the above, in either case.

Anonymous said...

LOL @ 'Miss Mittenfarts'! JeeezeLouise!!

Is she back from OZ yet? They must be sighing with relief to be rid of her....LMAO Bondi Blonde!!!


UKGrrl

Anonymous said...

Justin was recently spotted having dinner with ScarJo. She's also supposedly starring in his next video.

-G.G.

Anonymous said...

Jake is SO gay...please. No way he and Reese are getting it on.

Unknown said...

Ukgrrl, glad to see you got the reference ;) I have no idea what a mittenfart is, but whatever it is, I'm pretty sure it's useless ;)

They've got great white sharks down under, there is still hope for us!

Anonymous said...

http://www.papermag.com/?section=article&parid=1313

I thought that was kind of amusing.

Dano.

Anonymous said...

how wrong is it that i find papa joe hot :(

Anonymous said...

LMAO!! Joe reminds me of Joe Jackson. Working Jess like a damn slave driver. He ain't gettin much right now. She is back to doing Pizza Hut commercials!! Can I please have a meat lovers with extra sauce?

Hey, Justin and Cameron over? He never really seemed happy. It seemed like she was putting in the work to make him happy. I doubt that it has anything to do with Britney. I wish folks would stop saying that it does everytime he writes a song or does something. People wanna see them together, and I am afraid that it just ain't gonna happen. FYI, I read on another gossip blog that Brit talked to Kevin the phone and told him that she missed him and broke down crying when called to wish the boys a merry christmas. I wonder if that is true.

Jake and Reese? Stop it. Reese is very dignified and I admire the way she has been handling the press throughout her whole ordeal. Very mature woman and a talented actress. Ryan's loss, another mans gain.

That idiot from that TV show Lost. She should just quit, or better yet, when the show has run its course or if they kill her off, she won't have to worry about the paps. I don't know why they waste film on her anyway. She is soo unimportant.

Anonymous said...

Jake and Reese? Stop it. Reese is very dignified and I admire the way she has been handling the press throughout her whole ordeal. Very mature woman and a talented actress. Ryan's loss, another mans gain.

I really like Reese and she definitely is not stupid. She can sort her own destiny out without it being pointed out to her who to date and when.

This is exactly the reason why she banned cellphone cameras so gossip wouldn't get out. So when the press don't have any gossip they go right ahead & make it up anyway.

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