Friday, September 14, 2007

Ted C Blind Item

Beverly Hills is full o’ these freaks, right? Also, this one’s pretty plain ‘n’ simple, and besides, I’ll be so sleepless silly post-Emmys, I’ll probably answer this baby in next week’s mailbag (no promises), but meanwhile, here goes:

Flamboyant Floyd is under quite the pressures to remain young, dewy and youthful-looking on camera. He toils for one of the more glam TV jobs, and Floyd’s following expects the devilish dude to always look crackerjack, never cracked-out. After all, F.F. skewers those who don’t always look their best, right? Oui.

But, when F2 ain’t takin’ those who don’t dress appropriately to task, he likes to party with the boy-lovin’-boys (sounds fun to moi!). And there he was at one of West Hollywood’s more happening hangs, flirting up a laugh-riot storm, when a pretty young thang actually had the nerve to say to Mr. Floyd (not knowing who he was), “You actually look like a very young version of Flamboyant Floyd.”

Flam blanched a bit at first. But then he gathered his wits in record time—prolly even a bit faster than he does onscreen—and shot back: “Well, I am Flamboyant Floyd. It’s just that I’ve had so much Botox, I look two!”

Don’t push it, boyfriend. Thirty-two, maybe.


AIN'T - Anderson Cooper, Bill Maher, Ted Casablanca

34 comments:

ms_wonderland said...

Ooh it AINT Ted C! I chortled thinking he'd done a BI about himself.

Must be one of the 'Queer Eye' guys. Ted would never report Ryan Seacrest as having any wit.

Bryn said...

I was going to say Ryan Seacrest, but does he dish on people's attire?

Reese said...

I thought of Ryan Seacrest also. He has been looking as though he's had some help with Botox and other injectables lately.

tania said...

Most folk at E! seem to be gussing Seacrest, but that doesn't go with "when F2 ain�t takin� those who don�t dress appropriately to task". I've not heard Ryan say much about what people are wearing. This sounds more like one of the red-carpet dress-critics. So, remind me, who are those guys again?
And why would it be news that they try to look youthful, anyway? Or that they like boys? Both seem self-evident to me...

Pope-rah said...

It will definitely be someone who is already "out" or else Ted wouldn't reveal it.
It will be a yawner

Janele said...

It's totally Seacrest!!! REMEMBER - he does the red carpet too!!!!

Twisted Sister said...

Ted HATES Ryan Seacrest and has done other blinds of him - one where he's on his knees with someone to get to the top (we think it was Merv Griffin). This isn't Ryan because Ted would have used the same handle.

Who is the guy who does fashion with Joan Rivers? He skewers everyone's looks.

Dolly said...
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oddoneout said...

clinton kelly from what not to wear

tigereye said...

for some reason I thought Isaac Mizrahi. He does TV too doesnt he?

GammaGirl said...

Twisted Sister is right, Ted C has a different handle for Seacrest.
I hope we can rule out Tim Gunn...I love that man!

Maybe Carson Kressly?

wood1107 said...

I think it's Seacrest simply because Ted C. has it out for him and the syllables in his moniker match his name.

Janele said...

"Must be one of the 'Queer Eye' guys. Ted would never report Ryan Seacrest as having any wit. "

You're so right, now that I think about it. Ted hates him. So it's gotta be someone who is out, takes people to task for their clothing and is witty. It does seem like either Mizrahi or maybe Jay Manuel from E! who does the Fashion Police.

simone said...

It's totally Ryan Seascum. For Ted to say it's not Ted C, he was implying that it was someone else who works for E!

Ha ha!

Twisted Sister said...

Gammagirl, thanks for the backup. If people aren't used to reading Ted, it's easy to be confuzzled about his blinds. Probably Clinton from What Not to Wear, like Oddoneout said.

willbur said...

carson kressly.
"take those who don't dress appropriately to task..."

would/has ted c. out ryan in his column?

donna said...
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Twisted Sister said...

Willbur, yes, Ted has outed Ryan.

Twisted Sister said...

Wait, Wilbur, I'm not sure he's actually outed him by name. He's outed him in blind items only, I think.

Lianne said...

Clinton is 38. Carson is 37. Ryan is 32. Definitely Ryan.

Lianne said...
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buvez.rose said...

jay manuel people....

Brainy said...

Mario Lopez

Melissa said...

Oooooh, Buvez i think you have it.

"F.F. skewers those who don’t always look their best, right?"

America's Next Top Model? Totally Jay Manuel.

OR

It's Tim Gunn, but he doesn't look youthful anyway so I doubt it's him.

Visman said...

I thought Mark McGrath or Mario Lopez right away.

Mistik said...

Carson Kressley....

Pinky said...

What's the dirt here? That b'friend does botox? So?

balis006 said...

Carson Kressley.

majik8bong said...

It's Cojo.

1. Had a lot of plastic surgery (and has been around the Ho-wood scene for a whle--People magazine's fashion editor, according to wiki).
2. Openly gay.
3. Very witty and quick on his feet.
4. Born in Montreal, QC--Ted says "After all, F.F. skewers those who don’t always look their best, right? Oui."---OUI.
5. Worked for Canadian fashion magazine FLARE. Somehow it fits.

majik8bong said...

Oh, duh...I forgot the most important point.

6. Is pretty damned well known and has appeared on every entertainment type show in existence.

And he just looks like someone that could be nicknamed Flamboyant Floyd...lol.

Helena said...

majik8bong hit it. I couldn't think of the guy's name....

Mia said...

cojo? youthful looking?

jay manuel fits the blind best... he's got 2 image- related shows, (top model, and a makeover show) as well as a makeup line he just launched.

He also does fashion critique of the red carpets for E.

None of those other people have careers built on 4 different avenues of critiquing appearances.

Plus, he looks aptly dewy and botoxed.

kari said...

Definitely not Ryan Seacrest. For one, he doesn't dish on attire. He tries his hardest to sound hetero on the red carpet, and acts like he doesn't even know what words like magenta mean. Plus, I doubt he is openly hanging out in gay bars. And . . . he has absolutely no sense of humor about himself. He would never have responded to that in such a lighthearted and joking way. And would never admit to botox.

I'm in on the Jay Manuel guess. Fits all the descriptions. America's Next Top Model, Red Carpet Review, etc. Definitely dresses sharply. Looks botoxed to me.

Back to why it's not Ryan Seacrest . . . in his desparate attempt to look butch, he is all wrinkly jeans and scruffy cheeks on E News. Not "crackerjack".

Beth said...

Mark McGrath or Mark Steines. They work on entertainment shows that take others to task on their looks.

My money is on Steines. He and Leanza have been rumored to be swingers and he's been rumored to go both ways.