Four For Friday--Mother's Day Edition

All of the answers have a mother. Too difficult? OK, how about all the answers are mothers. (not as in difficult, but as in are a mom)

1. This sometimes brunette A list movie actress gave up her child for adoption twelve years ago while she was still struggling. Now the child wants to meet the mom, but the mom is freaked out by what the public may say.

2. This B list television actress mom who moves from show to show caught her then 17 year old daughter having sex with her then mid 40's husband.

3. This former A list movie actress, now struggling B list television/film actress never gets to see her teenage children. The reason is that she made Mommie Dearest look like a saint.

4. This mom of the century raised a lawyer/blogger who wants her to know how much she means to him and that he appreciates her struggles as a single mom. Yes, he was an ass as a teenager, "borrowed" money until his mid 20's, and maybe doesn't express his love enough, or call enough, but she's never stopped loving him which makes her the greatest mom in the world.

Bartles And Jaymes Poolside BBQ

You just can't hope to have a poolside BBQ without Alexis Arquette and Candy Ass.
Adam Brody and Mark McGrath just look like two guys having fun. No frat boy crap. Just fun.

Bijou Phillips back to being beautiful after last week's disaster.

Carmen. Carmen. Carmen. Wished three times but all I got was Candy Ass.

Everyone thought Cris Judd was working as a waiter there.

The only possible explanation is a hickey.

Are those Laboutines?

Woodstock was a very long time ago.

Another popular ZX guess is Taryn Manning.

More Links

LOST info and spoilers.

Bobby is suing Whitney. I'm trying to remember the last time Bobby was actually doing the suing. I'm sure he must have sued his New Edition manager or the record label he was on at the time, but other than that he has always been on the other side of the v. Bobby wants more time with his daughter. He says that he's been homeless at times since the divorce. Well sure, he and his daughter should spend some time homeless together. Good bonding experience. Maybe they can both get signs saying will work for food and hang out at an off-ramp. It could be his own version of take your daughter to work day.

Bruce Willis in a chat room. Hey, there was a non-believer. I know the feeling Bruce.

One family thinks the case of Jett Travolta should be investigated by the state of Florida.

Robbie Williams knows how to go online also.

Paris Hilton Looks Like Crap Photo Of The Day With Bonus Photo

When I first saw this photo of Paris from Coachella I was going to post it with a comment such as when Paris sees a video camera she just automatically assumes its porn and opens her mouth because she knows it's time to perform. But, then I said to myself one photo with a brilliant caption doesn't necessarily make it so.
Until today.

Pete Doherty Blood Art

So I can't decide what's more disturbing. The thought that Pete Doherty makes art from his own blood, or that he's splattering his diseased blood all over when he's making these concoctions. Do you really think he's precise and careful with his blood? Now, with the disgusting part out of the way, I have to say the bottom one isn't half bad. His art show opened recently and includes 10 pieces of work.

Mother's Day

As I do at every holiday or pseudo-holiday I try and find the very best spoofs that make a holiday special. Mother's Day shouldn't be an exception. I do want to say that I know many of you who read this are mothers and I hope that someone takes the time to give you special appreciation on Sunday. You deserve appreciation everyday of the year, but am glad you get your very own day so it's enforced. It's kind of like Valentine's Day in that regard. I also want to thank ZX for telling me what I should buy my mother and then making my gift look like crap in comparison to what she bought and made her mother. It doesn't matter though because all moms (well most of them) simply love the idea that you had to devote time to thinking of a gift and therefore were on your mind even more than usual. For the most part they don't really care what they get as long as it's given with love. This is why my mom was able to put up with 13 consecutive years of Charlie perfume.



The following video is one of the best tributes to moms I've seen.

Lyric Culture Launch Party

Who is this man?
Whoops. It's not a man it's Fergie. Actually, I must be losing my mind because she actually looks good here.

I know I'm losing my mind now because Kim Kardashian continues to wear less makeup and to look less like a porn star and actually looks good. This is the third consecutive time I haven't trashed her.

I've never thought Rachel Hunter was all that hot and it just gets worse as time goes by. She always looks like she's squinting which then gives her face that puckered fish look. She rarely smiles and just seems incredibly high maintenance. Hey, but Jarrett Stohl likes her and so I'm happy for them.

The reason I watched Fresh Prince. Oh, and DJ Jazzy Jeff also.

Have I missed Tracey Edmonds and Eddie Murphy together somewhere? My perception is they haven't been photographed together in a few weeks.

Sophia Bush does the mock fake tuxedo t-shirt. If she was wearing a coat and all you saw was the top you would be like hmmmm.

The good Brittany. Relatively speaking of course. But just for the shirt she's going to move up a few places in goodness.

I love Amerie's dress and look and just about everything else about her. Did I mention her legs?

Wendell Baker Story Premiere

Eva Mendes is always at the top. I need to be careful how I write that because a word or two difference makes me seem perverted. I am of course, but like to keep that side hidden.

Johnny Knoxville shows his love and affection for Luke Wilson.

He even did a drawing of his beloved.

I hate Owen Wilson. I think everyone knows why.

Pete and Bridget Sampras. Pete should just shave the head. When there is more hair on the brows than the hair, it's time to say buh-bye to the hair.

The Wilson Brothers. These are three guys who can probably down a drink or two.

Of course excessive drinking can lead to this.

Phoebe Price makes the list simply because she took the chance to wear what she's wearing. She's starting early with the Susan Sarandon route.

Can you tell that I really like Eva Mendes?

Morning Links

Jaime Pressly has a son.

More Halle Berry pregnancy rumors. This time with photos.

Spencer Pratt wants to sleep with Paris. He's the guy who started the free Paris petition and the guy who convinced Heidi Montage to get the boob job.

LaKisha Jones speaks out. (She was on American Idol. I don't watch, so I didn't know who she was.)

CityRag charts the progress of the Olsen nose jobs over the years.

Ted C. Blind Item

Where do we start? When are folks gonna realize that blowin' out your brain cells with booze, dope and doofus doings ain't exactly the best way to go? Prolly never. But what the hell, that's not gonna stop me from tellin' on Whore-tense Past-tense, the country's latest glossy victim in chemically enhanced career descent.

Whore-hon—such the doll. Well, I never thought she was, but lotsa other folks sure did. Always found W.T. to be a bit o' a fake onscreen, not to mention in real life. I mean, who else would date a gay man for years just to get herself more in the tabloids? I know, I know, half of Hollywood's female population, but you get my point. Also, forgive moi, but I never really found Ms. P., with all of her kooky outfits, to be all that attractive—and I think that's largely because, deep down inside, Whorey was projecting nothing but a desperation to find the next heroin fix.

Which she always has found—much to the chagrin of Whore-baby's current group o' hangers-on. And, trust, when a bunch of nobody poseurs who leech on to a star's fading wattage just to get attention start worrying for their so-called friend's welfare, that amiga's gotta be in pretty pitiful shape. And Past-tense sure is.

So much so, in W.'s increasingly notorious state of euphoric Hell-Ay horniness, she's screwing busboys here, waiters there, car parkers, too—and she never stops to think that these (almost always skinny) dudes just might talk. 'Course, they haven't (yet), but W.T.'s buds sure as ef have. And the only other thing that's got these ultraclassy hangers-on—not to mention W.T. watchers—gabbing as much would be Ms. Pee's skeletal frame. For your next meal, hon, you might try a noodle, not a needle.

Jackass v. Kindness

JACKASS

So, this former sex siren, aging B list actress on a hit network show was at a MAC Cosmetics recently. Well the brand new clerk recognized our actress and was very much wanting to help and make a big sale. Our actress proceeded to spend almost an hour with the clerk. Our actress wanted to try everything. She refused to use any of the testers on the counter and made the clerk open brand new packages of several different bottles of perfume. When the clerk began to say that she didn't know if she could do that, our actress did the "Don't you know who I am routine?" and that the store always let her do it because she spends so much money there.

Our actress then proceeded to try every kind of makeup and perfume imaginable until there was a pile of about 40 different items all opened and worth about $3000. At about this time the boyfriend of our actress shows up and our actress tells the clerk she has to go. The boyfriend asks if she's going to buy anything and the actress says, "Nope. It's all junk. I was just killing time waiting for you." With that, the actress walked out the door. Luckily, the clerk didn't get fired and now the actress is banned from the store.

KINDNESS

**This one came to me yesterday, is barely blind and will probably be public before the end of the day so guess quickly.**

So this once married singer and his girlfriend were getting on the elevator at their apartment when an older gentleman was coming out. As the gentleman exited the elevator, he stopped, grabbed his chest and fell down in front of them. The man managed to whisper to the singer that he had left his medication in his apartment. Our singer grabbed the keys and headed to the apartment while his girlfriend dialed 911. Our singer came back and gave the elderly man a pill and stayed with him until the paramedics arrived. The man was hospitalized overnight and then released.

How About Some More Links And Photos Of Jake G.

Almost midnight and Jake G and his friend Austin Nichols out at Borders. I guess Reese was busy.
Thanks to Henry and outofsightmedia for the photos.

Val Kilmer enjoys his food and a beer or two or 34 judging by these photos.

The American Idol producers want you to spend more time in front of the television. They are searching for the next great American band.

Britney's tour headed to Europe? Well if she only spends 15 minutes in each city, she could perform almost everywhere. Look. I like Britney, but I just don't think doing a 20 minute lip synch show is worth a tour.

Fantasy Island: The Movie starring Eddie Murphy???

ZX Never Has A Dull Day

I went to Home Depot and got lumber to make shelves. After having it cut and picking the stain, I found them prefab for a quarter the cost. But, if you're going to make shelves, you kind of HAVE to sand and get dirty, don't you? Isn't that the fun of being alive?

I went to meet a friend for lunch at Papa Cristo's, which is a hole in the wall market serving the most scrumptious Greek food this side of the Mediterranean. My favorite waiter told me they'd hired a new bus boy and he was telling him how as an infant he'd been separated from his family in the Greek earthquake of 1953 and sold by a scandalous judge. THE BUSBOY WAS HIS LONG LOST COUSIN!!! He just got back from meeting his mother and five brothers for the first time. If you ever lose faith, this is the kind of thing that will give you a good old fashioned poke in the peach cleft.

Anyway, the friend I was meeting is a director. He was telling me about all the exciting projects he's working on, and every time he would get particularly het up, yoink, I would snag an errant lamb chop and he would look perturbed, but go right on talking. I interrupted him to tell him that someone had contacted me about starring in his late father's comic book movie. Suddenly, I got a lot more glamorous and important and the disappearing lamb chops were no longer an issue.

I got rear ended on the 101 yesterday. No matter what is going on in your life, in a fraction of a second, WHACK! It gets exponentially worse. My best friend just suffered a hit and run, so I basically clogged up the freeway and suspiciously wrote down the license plate number before I glanced up to see the cutest little 16 year old girl mouthing horrified, "I'M SOOO SORRY!" It was her first accident and I wanted to let it go but the rental car she was in was destroyed, so I gave her a hug instead.

In regard to the Russian actress I'm working with and her accidents. All three of the drivers she rear ended WERE named Mike. The girl who hit me was named Mika, so maybe there is something to her theory.

Christina Fulton Charity Event

Aaaah. Nicolas Cage looks like the picture of health doesn't he? His wife looks pretty though.
Nicolas Cage's ex and their son. My family is a hugging family, but thankfully, my mom never hugged me like that or I might have decided to grow my hair like Cousin It and wear makeup. Whoops. Too late to help here.

I haven't seen Marla Maples in, well forever.

Shar Jackson looks really pretty. Hard to see what she saw in Mr. K-Fed.

More Links And ZX Later Today

Jamie-Lynn Sigler in Vegas Magazine.

In all seriousness, Amy Winehouse is rumored to be in the running to be the new Bond girl. What that says to kids is this:

Do meth, lose your teeth, become a movie star. Or, in Fergie's case a singer with a very deep voice.

Kim Kardashian sans the normal ten pounds of makeup. Stick with this look Kim. More photos here.

Kylie Minogue's having a mental affair. Well I'm sure that will make his wife much happier.

Beastie Boys have a new record coming out. It's entirely instrumental.

Dr. Phil about to be cancelled.

Nylon Magazine Young Hollywood Edition (in NYC???)

OK. The way I read this photo is that Lindsay Lohan and Calum Best are about five seconds away from full on sex and that Dina's excited to watch.
Tag-A-Long isn't happy about Lindsay's pick-up for the night.

Damien Fahey and Michael Strahan. Hmmmm.

NY Daily News Blind Item

Which married-with-offspring designer has been regularly leaving the office for dangerous liaisons with his much younger, reed-thin, male paramour?

Morning Links And Some Pics

You know you look like absolute crap when I say that Eva Longoria looks hot compared to you. Jessica Simpson has transmuted into some god awful Las Vegas cross-dressing parody of herself with a tan that looks worse than the old woman from There's Something About Mary. Also, the way she is posing her right fist is very, very strange.

Brittany Murphy wedding photo. Don't they look like the happy couple? He looks thrilled. Maybe he's really a zombie and Brittany has some kind of voodoo doll she uses which makes him always look that stiff. The man knows no other pose. Brittany, on the other hand knows exactly what she wants the world to see. Look at her show off that ring.
And a big ring it is. But remember, she has another one in case she gets bored with this one.

Angelina Jolie talks to Reader's Digest. It's actually pretty revealing.

Jared's porn past. Not as lurid as it sounds, but catchy isn't it?

The Hoff's former nanny holds the power. Which parent was nicer to her? Which one sang songs to her in German and called her Apple Strudel?

Today's Blind Items

So I've had a jackass ready for a week or so, but didn't have a kindness until about an hour or so ago. It's been awhile since I did a post like that and so I called around and found a good kindness. So tomorrow at this time will be the latest installment of Jackass v Kindness so hope you will check it out.

Anyway, I know you want something for today, so here it is.

I've been trying to avoid the gay and lesbian items because they are so prevalent everywhere else, but this one was too good to pass up. So, this very soft spoken A list actress in theory, but in reality couldn't open a movie in her name hasn't had the best luck when it comes to guys. All of her relationships have been in the public eye and have had disastrous results. I don't want to make it seem like she goes from one guy to the next, because she doesn't. Over the past few years there have only been three by my count and they were all long term relationships. Well, it seems as if our actress found someone on the set of her latest movie. The thing is the person she found was a woman. She can't possibly go public with it and as far as I know its her first time being in a relationship with a woman. There's no pressure on our actress from her lover, and so the two are spending some time together away from prying eyes while they decide whether it's real or just a fling. This one is a really big shocker and would probably make your mouth drop. I actually think she deserves some happiness whether with a man or a woman.

Lindsay Lohan's Daily Intake

From tomorrow's National Enquirer.

Lindsay Lohan's drug and alcohol use is escalating out of control. The troubled actress is snorting massive amounts of cocaine mixed with Ecstasy, taking downers to sleep and boozing daily, insiders say. As The Enquirer already reported Lindsay already suffered a secret drug overdose on November 12th. "Lindsay's drugging and drinking is out of control! She learned nothing in rehab," a Lohan friend reveals. Lindsay's substance abuse kicked into high gear when she hit the Coachella music festival in Indio, California in late April. Her friend says, "Lindsay bought six tablets of Ecstasy “ three with an imprint of a blue Smurf and three with a pink diamond. She also bought an eight-ball of cocaine (about 3½ grams). Lindsay did line after line of coke all weekend. She was always the last one to leave all-night parties because she was still flying high." Lohan's friend says Lindsay also drank heavily. "One morning she ordered a $400 breakfast; two bottles of Ketel One vodka, one bottle of Belvedere vodka and a bottle of Patron tequila. Since that weekend, Lindsay has been drifting a near-24/7 haze. Lindsay crushed Ecstasy into the coke and snorted it to get a hardcore rush. Her favorite alcohol is vodka. She pours it into a 16-oz. water bottle and drinks it straight or mixed with some soda. But she also drinks tequila and champagne."

Time Magazine 100 Most Influential People Party

Has anyone ever seen America Ferrera not smiling?
"I'll trade you Jessica for Oprah straight up."

One of my favorite couples.

Matt Lauer and his wife have matching haircuts. Hey, at least they don't dress alike. Well in public anyway.

So do I think she looks like a Queen because she is or does she really look like a Queen?

Yes, Tina. You and Alec will keep working together.

Ziyi Zhang is absolutely stunning.

I wonder who she blogs for?

Victoria Beckham Is A Jackass

Well she would've been a jackass if I heard this first. For now we'll just savor that warm, fuzzy feeling you get when you hear a wonderful tale such as this.

From tomorrow's National Enquirer.

Three of Victoria Beckham's credit cards were rejected at a popular West Hollywood mall recently, according to an eyewitness, and that's when Posh got scary. She was at the Abercrombie & Fitch at the Grove in late April and headed to the checkout counter with $12,000, and a customer shopping says 3 credit cards were rejected when the salesperson tried to ring up the purchase. The eyewitness adds, "Victoria said there must be something wrong with the store's computer and said she should go somewhere else to shop. The nervous cashier tried to explain that it wasn't her fault, but Victoria snapped at her: never mind, take this one!"

The purchase was completed on the fourth attempt but the drama was far from over. Victoria insisted her packages be delivered to her home, but store workers said the most they do was help her load her car; Victoria furiously backed up her Lincoln Navigator to the shop's front door. After her packages were loaded Victoria demanded they do it over because it wasn't done correctly. After the employees packed her car for the second time she jumped in and roared off. As she took off the shopper says they (the employees) broke into applause!

(The only question I have about this story is whether Victoria Beckham actually drives.)

More Links

Ricki Lake loses over 100 pounds.
Bachelor spoiler alert.

Brittany Murphy confirmed her marriage. It seems Brittany couldn't decide which wedding ring she wanted so her new husband bought two. One was a five-carat platinum ring with a yellow diamond surrounded by white stones, the other was a six-and-a-half-carat platinum ring with a cushion-cut diamond and diamonds embedded into the band. Neil Lane has NEVER had a customer who bought two wedding rings. Well he's never had a customer like Brittany Murphy.

Penelope Cruz dating Lenny Kravitz?

Laura Prepon is single. Where did I put my Binaca and my dentures? I'm going out tonight.

David Beckham shaved his head.

Georgia Rule Premiere

Jay McCarroll gets to be top billed because he's way more interesting then the rest of the crowd. Have I told you how pissed I was when Bravo only aired one episode of his television show.
Yeah, with Paris in jail, I'll get even more attention.

"Felicity. If I had to work with Eva Longoria and Lindsay Lohan I would want to keep a steady drunk going at all times also."

Jane Fonda is such a where is she now kind of actress that she was relegated to the furthest backdrop possible.

I wonder if Lindsay is a role model to Ali Lohan. Please don't let it be her mom she looks up to.

You just know that someday one of Dina Lohan's kids is going to write a tell all book. I live for that day.

NY Daily News Blind Item

Which younger Oscar winner tells pals he has to smoke so much pot because he has paranoia about constantly being followed?

Naomi Campbell In W Magazine

You can read her community service diary here.

Morning Links

Put your hair down, cover up the bones with a higher neckline and wolf down a hamburger and you get an incredible 24 hour transformation for Cate Blanchett. I can't even look at the photo on the right anymore. It really is disturbing.


Johnny Depp is going to finally get married this summer.

Nancy Grace leaves Court TV. Or did Court TV let go of Nancy Grace?

Britney Spears and Marilyn Monroe to sing a duet.

Courteney Cox has a job for at least another year.

Robert Rodriguez is in talks to direct The Jetsons. I never envisioned an NC-17 rating for The Jetsons but it should be interesting. I guess we should get used to the idea of Rose McGowan playing Rosie the maid in a way no ten year old could ever comprehend.

Woman forces 83 year old roommate to smoke crack.

Today's Blind Items

So everyone thinks its always the B and C list actors who get into trouble, but not so. I love the A list tidbits because they just feel bigger and better. This A list actor who has been in three top five yearly box office hits has always flown under the radar. Not really seen out and about very much. Turns out he prefers activities at his home instead. He's married, but it's in name only. His wife is his partner though. He loves having threesomes and watching them as well. However with his famous face it's hard for him to go out with his wife and find someone. So, he sends her out alone to pick up women for them. She lures them back to their place and gets down and dirty with her pickups. He watches on a monitor in the other room. During the evening his wife drops hints about our actor to see if the other woman will be up for it. If she is, then our actor joins them. If the pickup does not sound like she's into it, they don't take any chances and our actor stays hidden and just keeps watching and taping. How is it known about the taping? Maids can be pretty nosy, especially when they aren't paid very well. The last maid cost our actor some serious money in order to keep the tapes quiet. Hopefully he locks his door now.

ZX--Cookie Monster, Eckhart Tolle, And The Swedish Gymnastics Team

Filming was fun. I went to the set at 12:30 and arranged to have my friend meet me there for lunch. He's gay and when he saw my wardrobe he said, "No, Honey," and I trust him implicitly. So we went to the wardrobe trailer and played dress up in crack whore outfits for a few hours, adding more and more cleavage with each change. Gay men know all the secrets of 'chicken cutlets,' and double sided tape and things I don't even want to think about, but I looked ready to feed an infant orphan nation all by myself.


In the scene we filmed, I was watching a girl get raped and trying to intervene. Apparently I was doing too good a job because the other actor couldn't fend me off and finally asked if he could slap me in the face. Of course I said yes, and he was not kidding. I couldn't see out of my eye for about an hour so I waited for my vision to come back, stuffed my pie hole with Craft Service, and talked to an actress with a heavy Russian accent. She said, "I have been driving for just a short time and already this year, I have accident with three cars. And all three very brand new, expensive. And all named 'Mike." I thought my ears had deceived me, but no. She continued, "They should have a sign to warn me that their name is Mike."


It would be the only decent thing to do, really. She said, "I just start to cry and they forgive me." Her eyelashes were so long and she looked so innocent, I don't see how anyone could resist. I caught myself staring at her tiny body trying to figure out how a person's elbows could be bigger than their shoulders, but she didn't join me for quesadillas and sandwiches, so that was probably it.


Fried at the beach with my new friend and were in paroxysms of laughter as we watched a handstand-off between two men in banana hammocks. She thought one of the guys was imitating the other one and making fun of him but I think it was the Swedish gymnastics team taking in a little sun.


A pod of dolphins were nice enough to perform for us as we read Eckhart Tolle and used-car shopped in The Recycler. "I want an '07 Beemer with power windows, power doors, and Power of Now!" Eckhart told me that my stalking tendencies were from clingy neediness and I say phooey. Someone should decide if their intentions are pure BEFORE they kiss you. That goes for Dad's Bags as well, who has suddenly disappeared without a trace.


Had a lunch meeting with a producer a couple of days ago for the flight attendant comedy and as I was leaving, this lady who looked like a beige Cookie Monster, told me she had just spoken to the angels Gabriel and Michael and they wanted her to give me my messages. Piqued, I walked with her "wherever God guided us," which was uncannily to the ATM and had my crystals read. I had to make wishes out loud, and it was kind of like making a life plan with my accountant, only about spiritual matters. Funnily enough, both my finances and my soul are in shambles. Apparently someone cursed me at birth, and she eradicated it, so I've got that going for me. The thing about people who are a few shy is that they so totally believe every word they utter, you start to get swept up in it.


I have another friend who's schizophrenic. He told me he's the Chosen One and has been stalked by different incarnations of Mary Magdalene through seven lifetimes and to save the human race, he had to marry a girl and live in Hawaii so he could survive the Los Angeles Tsunami which was scheduled for last September. I only wonder who his bride is because I egged him on for three hours, but a lifetime is just a whole other kind of commitment.

Liv Tyler In Elle Mexico

More Links And ZX Later Today

Kate Moss at the Costume Gala last night.


Terri Irwin was devastated at the Logie Awards when clips were shown of an interview she had done immediately after Steve Irwin's death. Organizers stated they thought she had left the room, but that contradicts the fact that cameras were trained on her for her reaction to the footage.

If entertainment is supposed to make you laugh, then this qualifies. A video of a guy stealing a projector by putting it into his pants.

Brad and Angelina in a threesome? I could see it. It is allegedly the answer to a NY Daily News Blind Item from April 5th.

Wall Street sequel?

Hold Paris Accountable Petition Update

I didn't look at the link thoroughly and therefore didn't see you had to pay to sign. I agree that's unacceptable. If you want the link, you can e-mail me and I'll pass it on.

Poiret: King Of Fashion Costume Institute Gala

There are just so many photos from this event and so many celebrities and I don't have room for them all. Therefore I selected primarily from people we tend to think of as glamorous or who we do not see much of on a daily basis. Therefore, no Lohan or Simpson or anything like that. I did include one of the Olsens because I have one joke and one joke only for this post and it involves one of the Olsens. The reason for the no jokes is because I think that everyone looks pretty incredible. There are exceptions, but I don't think snarkiness is necessary in every post.

Scarlett Johansson
Say what you will about Renee Zellweger but she makes evening gowns look like they were made for her.
Maybe change the hair. Definitely change the husband. (OK, two jokes)

Jennifer Hudson looks very lovely, although I thought her purse was a Wii at first.

I'm guessing that it was nice for Jennifer Garner to not be at the park for once.

The good Eva.

I know everyone loves Chloe and her sense of style but I don't always get it. This looks pretty though.

I love the dress Christina Ricci is wearing but I wish she had worn her hair down.

Cameron Diaz actually looks pretty. Is that makeup she's wearing?

You know I'm going to put Amanda in here no matter what.

"So, that's L-o-u-b-o-u-t-i-n? But that's not how ZX spells it. Are you sure you're spelling your name right?"

NY Daily News Blind Item

Which world-famous globetrotting beauty is rumored to be having a same-sex affair with a Victoria's Secret model? Some even say her lucky husband is allowed to switch in.


**Why doesn't he just say that the husband is allowed to participate instead of the phrase switch in. That makes it sound like they are in a tag team wrestling bout or something. **

Morning Links And A Very Shocking Photo

Cate Blanchett doesn't look well at all.

Neve Campbell and John Light got married.

George Michael plead guilty to a DUI. I don't really understand why he had to plead guilty. Does "Pete" law not apply to the rest of the country?

Paris wants Arnold to pardon her because she provides hope for the young people all over the world. Hope for what? That with her notoriety there might soon be a cure for herpes? Paris also re-hired Elliot Mintz. Don't let her suck you back in Elliot.

Today's Blind Items

I just want you to go back and revisit some of the old blind items and I think you might find something that pertains to something in one of the posts today.

Anyway, have you noticed that this former Academy Award winning actress/supporting actress (not going to make it too easy) has never been in anything quite to the level as her award winning role? For years she has tried, but for years following the award she was such a pain to work with professionally and personally that she burned lots and lots of bridges. Her demands were divaish beyond belief and her drug use was so extensive that she had to reconstruct her nose. For the last two years, she has tried to rebuild those bridges and has sucked up to lots and lots of people. It's starting to pay off. The fact that she had to spend a little time making some producers and directors extra happy and make their fantasies come true probably also helped matters somewhat. She is busier now than she ever was before. Hopefully she's learned her lesson and won't repeat the same behaviors.

More Links and Some Pics

What is Rumer Willis trying to tell us here?

"Aaaah. I do have some."

Paris says cops pull her over to hit on her. Yes, well they will have plenty of opportunities to do that one on one very soon.

Ty Pennington arrested for DUI. Didn't know they had bars at Sears, but I'm always learning new things.

Tom Cruise buys a new prison.

Nominees For The Most Stylish GQ Cover

April 1964, Marcello Mastroianni
September 1967, Sammy Davis Jr.

November 1971, Johnny Carson

April 1975, Martin Sheen

Macrh 1980, Richard Gere

October 1980, Billy Dee Williams

December 1988, Tom Cruise and Dustin Hoffman

August 2003, Johnny Depp

September 2003, Johnny Knoxville

September 2006, Clive Owen

2007 TV Week Logie Awards - aka A Reason To Show The Suit Andrew G Is Wearing

It actually looks like the suit and ties are made from the same material. Some type of rubber perhaps or soft pleather. I don't think it's real leather.

Reasons for wearing this suit:

1. I'm guessing Noa's here in LA right now for you to get away with wearing that suit.
2. Trying to make sure I'll offer him $1000 if he gets married in that suit. Bet.
3. You're still drinking aren't you?
4. Jim told you it looked good didn't he?
5. Ryan Seacrest has one just like it.
6. It's for charity.
7. You knew that no matter what you would look better than Avril Lavigne.
You know how pictures can get burned into a television after awhile. I think her eye makeup is the same. I don't think she even bothers to try and take it off anymore. She just rubs more and more in each day.
She looks exactly like her mom and dad. It's like a 50/50 split.

I just really like James Morrison's shirt. You know how tough it must be to be a singer named Jim Morrision?

Shrek The Third Premiere

Self-portrait
Yea. That's a kiss alright. That's why JT's lips are sucked in like he's going to catch the plague.

It's time for a new look.

Do they just hide Larry King's ventilator for theses photos? Seriously, Mr. Burns looks better.

Actually Mr. Burns looks better than Melanie Griffith also. I never quite realized what a hottie Mr. Burns was until now. Do you think Melanie Griffith can move her mouth? I've never been able to figure out exactly what she's got on Antonio Banderas but I'm guessing it's pretty good.

It was irreconcilable differences right?

I don't have anything bad to say because Teri Hatcher is with her daughter. Honestly though, from the neck down she looks great.

Eddie Murphy gets served. Not really. But if I were him, I would stay faaaaar away from anyone bearing pieces of paper.

Amy Poehler and Maya Rudolph look much better when I'm half asleep on Saturday nights.

Morning Links

All weekend long I looked at those images of Lindsay Lohan allegedly snorting coke. I say allegedly because I must have looked the photos on twenty sites and I still can't see anything. Of course I couldn't ever see the picture of the animal in those dot paintings either. What I can't understand is how come there isn't the actual video? If I saw the video then we would have a context and get a better idea of the situation. Here is the original story, and the best blowups I've found. Let this be a lesson to all you coke using actresses. Don't let friends film you while you are possibly using drugs or in the same room with drugs. There was a blind item I think I wrote about Lindsay right about that whole time period when she was sleeping with Jude Law. I need to find it. BTW, James Blunt must be a walking incubator for the deadliest diseases right about now. Like the Playboy Grotto in the late 70's or early 80's.

Elliot Mintz faithful to the end. Even after Paris stabs him in the back, he falls on the sword for her one last time.

Stop me if you've heard this one before. Pete Doherty arrested for drug possession. OK, how come he just can't do his drugs at home where he wouldn't get caught? Well no doubt he'll get off for this as well. I'm surprised the judges in the UK haven't just offered to do the jail time for Pete. This latest arrest will probably make Kate smile with glee and they'll no doubt get married or engaged for the 45th time later this week.

Ny Daily News Blind Item

Which married country singing star has his managers pick up hustlers from the Nashville airport and drive them to a hotel room rendezvous? They're back on a plane out two hours later.


**What the heck is a hustler? Who uses that word? If they're back on a plane two hours later, our guy doesn't last very long. I mean you have to check in 45 minutes early for your flight. For that amount of time, he almost would be better off spending the $15.95 for spank-o-vision in the hotel room he's renting.**

Not Getting Any Younger And Running Out Of Rich Guys, Brittany Murphy Gets Married

I think the headline says it all. This one actually seems to enjoy spending money on her and can handle her spoiled brattiness far more effectively than her 25 other ex-fiancees. Pre-nuptial? I don't think so. I just don't see her marrying anyone if she had to sign a pre-nup. I'm sure the marriage will last forever, or until she sees a new dog in the window. Brittany has gone from this funny, comedic sweetheart who was always fairly nice to everyone to a spoiled brat who only thinks about what's in it for her. The transformation hasn't been good for her.