Friday, September 21, 2007

Sex And The City Photos From The First Three Days Of Filming

The photos are in order of the days of filming, but you never know what order they are shooting it, so what happens is a big guess. I love guessing so here is how I see it so far. Carrie Bradshaw has become a dementor and is trying to suck the soul out of Mr. Big with a dementor's kiss.
After successfully completing her mission, Carrie strolls the streets looking for more outrageous fashions and someone who wants to have sex with a 40ish single person who acts 20.
Not realizing that Mr. Big didn't have any soul to begin with, he appears fine and wants to get his revenge on Carrie for trying to suck his soul because she didn't know.

Charlotte, thinking Mr. Big has come back from the dead screams as she sees Mr. Big approach.
When realizing he is still alive and has no soul, Charlotte begins crying because she always finds men with lots and lots of problems and for once would like to find a guy with no soul and and who isn't as high maintenance as her.
Completing her quest for some really bad fashion, Carrie licks her lips in anticipation of someone getting to close to the growth on her chest and it sure as hell isn't her breasts. Meanwhile the elderly women in NY are wondering what the hell she's wearing, even though they themselves are wearing work boots more suitable for a construction site.



Kim Kardashian Throws Miss USA Under A Bus


That story I had earlier today about Kim Kardashian giving the old how's your father, to Terrence Howard came as a bit of a shock to Kim who first saw the report in Page Six. (who knew she could read?) Kim claims it wasn't her giving the dirty lap dance to Terrence Howard at the club Butter but none other than Miss USA Rachel Smith who is Terrence's girlfriend.

After all the issues we had with our last Miss USA contestant, I find it hard to believe that Rachel Smith was bumping and grinding a still married Terrence at a nightclub. I find it even more difficult to believe that someone could confuse Rachel Smith with Kim Kardashian. Look at the photos above and tell me how they could be confused. Yes, they both have dark hair, but that is where the similarities end. I could see how you could confuse Kim with a drag queen, but not Miss USA. Also, even though Kim is referring to Butter as where the indiscretion took place, I believe the location of the alleged bump and grind and make out session happened at Tenjune. I'm sure Kim's dance card is filled with guys with big wallets and so she has trouble recalling who she was with and where she was, but also, maybe Terrence is a big spender and so she wants to reassure Miss USA to keep those presents from Terrence coming.

Thanks to Dlisted for the side by side photo.

Four For Friday--All From AP--One Jackass

#1 This height challenged male singer of extraordinary pedigree, was eating at a restaurant the other night which is Michelin rated. When he got his food he sent it back twice, but not before letting his guests sample the food and almost finishing the plates before he deemed it awful. He finally just threw his hands in the air and told the waiter he wanted a peanut butter and jelly sandwich. When the waiter informed the chef, the chef caved and made it, but not before someone went down to the corner and bought some peanut butter. When it came back, our singer returned it because the crusts hadn't been removed. Finally it came back perfect and our singer spent 45 minutes eating one sandwich which was 1 hour after the restaurant closed.

#2 This closeted B+ film actor with the perfect teeth and smile recently hit on another D list actor he thought was gay. Turns out the D list actor wasn't gay and left our B list actor in tears and made the D list actor promise not to tell anyone. Seems he broke his promise huh? I could give you a million clues and you would never come up with the D lister so don't even bother.

#3 This married director with the B list film bombshell to some actress wife has been carrying on an affair with her assistant.

#4 This curvy female singer didn't lose all her recent weight just with diet and exercise, but with a little help from a knife and some pills.

Nothing Says Diva Like A Little KFC


The president of KFC, Gregg Dedrick has extended an invitation to Jennifer Lopez and her husband to have an after party at anyone of the 5,500 KFC's across the country.

In his letter, Dedrick said, "We would like to offer you, your entourage and a few VIP guests an 'all access' pass to the KFC location of your choice. You have a bucketful of choices for 'after-party' locations because KFC has more than 5,500 restaurants across the country."Hearing about your fondness for KFC was music to our ears, so just name the time and the place and we'll open our doors to you for a post-concert feast."

It's a great idea from KFC, but if you read closely, they are actually being pretty cheap about it. Jennifer and her entourage can eat for free, but only a few VIP guests. Everyone else I guess has to go ahead and pay for their chicken. If you really could get Jennifer Lopez to come eat at a KFC after a concert, are you really going to make everyone go up to the cashier and order their 3 piece meal?

Random Photos Part One

John Mayer gets the top spot today because he actually looks cool, and good. Amazing what happens when you shed a 110 pound crying barbie doll.
Let's go post this on the refrigerator at Ben's house right next to the pics Violet probably draws. I know it's a movie, but Jen Lopez to Jen Garner to Jen Aniston. hmmmm
I think we should get used to this for the next 15 years or so as both Hilary Duff and Hayden Panettiere seem to have some staying power.
Chandra Wilson gets kudos for helping out with one of my favorite charities, Habitat For Humanity.
Emilie de Ravin looks lovely as usual, but she also looks like she ages twice as fast as the rest of us.

Rachel Bilson looks great and just needs to dump that beard.

I know everyone is kind of mixed on Kate Beckinsale, but I like her. Just wish she would switch to a different style dress. I just see it on her over and over and over. Now, it would be different if she was taking it off in front of me over and over and over, but since she's not, she needs to find something new and exciting or I will turn my fantasies elsewhere.
But not to Jamie Lynn Spears. You worry don't you? Worry more than with Ali Lohan or the same? I just see Jamie Lynn getting knocked up, but being normal in a hillbilly kind of way, and Ali Lohan just being something you see in a True Hollywood Story.
Well if they are going to deny Jennifer Lopez is pregnant, then she will just be fatty McButter pants from now on.
Hilary was very busy last night, but managed to change clothes and not bring her sister. Two big plusses. Where is her sister anyway?
Stephen finds some old loving in Lauren Conrad. Appropriate they get back together at a tequila opening.
Tequila to pregnancy, but hey, they are random photos. Elisabeth Hasselback from the new Pregnancy Magazine.

The hostess of the Hornitos Tequila party was none other than Ashlee Simpson. Pimpa wanted to come because he thought Hornitos meant horny women so wanted to come, and free booze so it was even better. Ashlee told him to stay home, and she would bring him home some tequila and he could just stare at pics of Jessica on the internet all night.
Wow. Sarah Michelle Gellar actually looks pretty and sweet. Usually it is one or the other. Actually, never sweet.




How Come We Haven't Heard About This?


On Wednesday, the rapper Twista and his tour bus were pulled over in Michigan while they were en route to perform in Detroit. Police pulled the bus over because they suspected Twista and his group of possessing illegal drugs.

What was originally a two car traffic stop turned into seven police cars who shut down one lane on an interstate for two hours just to search the tour bus. The result of their search? Nothing, nada, zilch.

The manager of Twista, Rawle Stewart accuses the Michigan State Police of racial profiling and knows they wouldn't pull over Britney's tour bus even or any other white star.

Stewart went on to say, " I think it was a case of profiling because they immediately assumed we had drugs and told us they found residue, but was letting us off with a warning. It was so petty. When it was all said and done, we didn't even get a ticket. They gave us a lecture like, 'In Michigan we don't tolerate that and if you come through our state again, you will get locked up.' There's people on the interstate passing by like, Is that Twista? They said to us 'This may help your career or it may hurt your career, but we don't tolerate that in Michigan.'"

I have to agree that this seems like such a waste of time. The police responded by saying the tour bus operator is a known drug trafficker. Well they weren't operating the bus were they?

Britney: Short- Listed For Television Role


This is something straight out of Jurassic Park IV, Attack Of The Government Dinosuars. Britney Spears, yes that Britney Spears has been short-listed to co-star along side Matthew Perry in a remake of a 60's show which also sounds a whole lot like that show Debra Messing and Thomas Hayden Church did.

The basic premise is that Matthew Perry is a guy with a job and needs a wife to impress the boss. Enter Britney Spears as the fake wife. You know what would be better is if he needed a wife because everyone thought he was gay and then he had this internal struggle, or better yet, the woman has a career and she needs a husband because she is this super butch looking type and so everyone assumes she's gay, but she's not, she's just really ugly.

I don't think Britney in any television show is going to work. First of all it is going to be a sitcom so that means filming almost everyday and at an early hour. Second she will be required to be there and sober which could be challenge. Plus, does anyone think she can actually act? Did you see Crossroads? For that matter who thinks Matthew Perry can act? He has one character. At least with Britney you have the possibility of four or five different personalities coming out so Matthew could be married to a new woman each week or have a new girlfriend each week and impress his sexist bosses who live vicariously through him.

Brooke Mueller Has Some Mortifying E-Mails From Denise Richards


Charlie Sheen's fiancee Brooke Mueller has got involved in the custody battle because she's pissed.

It's actually pretty easy to get pissed at Denise Richards. She makes it almost fun actually. Denise is now saying that Charlie only got engaged to make the covers of magazines and that their poor children had to find out from the television that their father was engaged. First of all, what the hell are your kids doing watching anything other than cartoons or Baby Einstein? Are you honestly admitting that your kids are sitting there watching E! and Entertainment Tonight and paid such close attention to the fact thier dad was on television and understood what he was going to be doing? Puhleeze.

Denise has released several e-mails from Brooke which Brooke is alleging have been carefully edited by Denise to put Charlie in the worst possible light. Brooke on the other hand alleges she has 40 e-mails which will ruin Denise Richards, but is trying to take the high road and so is holding on to them for now. I would love to see those e-mails. Love to, love to.

Kim Kardashian Whoring Herself Out Again


I had at some point in the past few months decided to give Kim Kardashian a break. It seemed as if she were turning her life around and trying to make amends for her whorish behavior in relation to the most boring sex video ever made and instead was trying to settle down.

She had found a guy in Reggie Bush who is a great guy and they were engaged and the whole wedding thing was being talked about and so, I said fine, she's being good, they are happy, don't trash her.

But now it turns out that even though she was allegedly all in love with Reggie and cried during an interview about how much she loved him and yada yada yada that within days of him dumping her ass, that she is already sitting on the lap of a married, but separated Terrence Howard, making out with him and giving him a lap dance right in front of everyone.

Maybe her explanation will be it's all for her new show on E! My guess is that it's because she just chases one wallet after another and is hoping to tie down one wallet for a very long time, but if not, then she will let you use your wallet on her for a night or two or a week. When she starts dating some waiter who lives with four other guys and makes minimum wage, then I'll believe she has changed and can love. Right now, all she loves is money, specifically Terrence's but if you have enough you can go out with her too.

Marcia, Marcia, Marcia Means A Whole Lot More Now


Maureen McCormick who played Marcia in the Brady Bunch reveals her lesbian affair with Eve Plumb who played Jan on the same show.

So, if I'm keeping track here, Marcia had sex with Greg and Jan, just not at the same time and Peter had sex with Cindy or was it that Cindy had sex with Bobby and did Mom get it on with Greg also? I can't keep it straight.

Nothing that went on in that show is any different from any other show today, it's just that it was considered such a classic, wholesome show and so any whiff of scandal or anything just gets us all in a tizzy. If we found out that Rose McGowan and Alyssa Milano had sex on the set of Charmed, I would think it was hot, but I don't think it would be getting a post in every blog.

People still love the Brady Bunch and all the cast members and as they start to run out of money or the autograph shows are not paying as much, I think we can expect to see some more dirt. I really want to hear what Cindy has to say because she has always been the one who never really wanted to do reunion shows and such and so I'm wondering if she has the biggest, darkest secret of the bunch. I'm thinking she does.

Ted C Blind Item

My mother called. She said this column’s starting to resemble “a newsletter for filthy-mouthed nobodies who need to go to sex rehab.” Mind you, Mariah thinks Lindsay Lohan is a nobody, but then, arguably, she has a point.

So, for Ms. C (the elder one), let’s give the inebriated diddling-behind-stalls and same-sex ferreting a break—just for today. But no go on the nasty-tongued biz, sorry! Like when did I ever really do what mama told me...

Bravado Boom-Cocks is quite famous but not always exactly beloved. Even though he’s a mucho gifted, award-showered, multitalented performer, he’s not really known for his private cool. Indeed, BBC was out here on the coast, having flown in for a project he’s doing, as well as a charity gig he was asked to participate in—reason being, the charity’s contributing beaucoup bucks to B’s latest pro undertaking. He was sorta forced into it, actually.

The organizer of said project had been in direct contact (no rep go-between) with Bravado, a line of communication Mr. Boom-Cocks sometimes chooses, as he detests pretense intensely. But Boomy-baby now regrets that decision, big-time.

See, Bravado isn’t exactly known for dressing, how shall we say, chicly? BBC rarely wears anything even approaching couture. For this reason, the organizer gave the charity event’s handler Boom-Cock’s private cell number, which the handler blithely called pronto.

“Even though things are more casual out here,” the charitable worker bee blathered on, once Bravado answered, “you really shouldn’t be dressing like you’re going to somebody’s barbecue or anything.”

Bravado’s polite response? “F--k you, lady!” he bellowed, and promptly hung up.

Then B dialed, brow slightly sweating with anger. Called up the guy who had given out his number in the first place. “How dare you? If you ever give out my number again,” BBC fumed, “I will see to it that you get me a new phone and call every one of my contacts and give them the new number, you f--king bastard!”

BBC wasn’t done, either: “And for punishment, tonight, when I show up, I will be taking no pictures whatsoever, not with anybody, no matter how much money they’ve donated, so you can learn your lesson and never do this to me again, you f--king jerk!”

The poor man, no doubt holding his own phone far away from his eardrums, begged BBC to reconsider. He did not. And you thought Ireland Baldwin was the only put-upon cellie caller in town?

Think again.

And It Ain't

Sean Penn, Billy Bob Thornton, Denis Leary

Thursday, September 20, 2007

Today's Blind Items--Kindness

Regarding the Old Hollywood one yesterday, let's go ahead and define Old Hollywood as pre-1960. It might help if you think of the religious leader as also being a head of state.

This former A+ film actor and now a B+er with some issues has been known in the past to lend a helping hand. This time he was returning from the set of his latest film when he saw a couple on the side of the road and their car obviously not going anywhere because of the smoke coming out of it. The shoulder was very narrow and the car was almost on the highway, but no one was stopping. Our actor stopped the car he was driving and he and his passenger got out to see if they could help. After discovering the couple had no cell phone with them, and were on vacation and didn't know anyone to call, our actor let them borrow his phone and call for help. Help was going to be at least 90 minutes, so our actor offered them a lift. The problem was he was driving a two seater, and there were four people total including the actor, his companion, and the couple. Our actor told the companion/assistant to stay behind and watch the car, and then got the couple situated in the passenger seat with the woman sitting on the man's lap. He then drove them to their hotel 30 minutes away, bought them dinner and stayed with them until our actor's companion/assistant showed up at the hotel with tow truck and broken down car which was taken back to the place from which it was rented.

Random Photos Part One

Even though it's a movie, you just know in your heart of hearts that Jessica Simpson has been in this position before.
Let the Jennifer Aniston baby bump rumors begin. Of course she could just be getting fat like Marc Anthony called Jennifer Lopez when denying her pregnancy.
I just wanted to post a photo of The Rock playing with a Barbie doll.
Forget about Beyonce's new hair color, her damn eyelashes are almost to her eyebrows which would make one hell of a uni brow. I have experience with uni brows, and then when I tried to fix it, ended up with no brows, but I just told everyone I had been freebasing and burned them off to make it sound cool.
You thought I was going to say speaking of freebasing didn't you? No, Ben Affleck is just thrilled to not be on a damn playground.
Well at least Vince Vaughn is down to two chins from the four he was sporting previously.

Tara Reid's new guy kind of looks like Ryan Reynolds, but I haven't seen Ryan carrying a man purse, and he was in LA doing Scarlett so this is probably just his doppelganger.
Prince has got more makeup on than his date.
From the set of Lost. I won't show you what happened right before this because I don't want to ruin it for you in case you watch, but it did have something to do with a gun.
Ummm. Does Kim Kardashian really need another camera?

Angelina Jolie Used Knives During Sex At 14


Wow, I would have never guessed Angelina Jolie was into that type of thing. From everything I know about Angelina I would think she was a turn off the lights get undressed in the dark missionary type of woman. Guess I was wrong.

Turns out she was into the knives during sex when she was 14. She doesn't say how old her boyfriend was at the time or if he looked much like her brother, but this is what she did say to Cosmo, "My S+M lifestyle was dangerous. My then-boyfriend and I used knives on each other. I was 14 and wanted to break out. I didn't tell anyone about it; it was a dark secret. "But I've since been more careful with things like that."

She has since been more careful. She doesn't say she's not doing it, just that she's more careful. Do you think she threatens Brad with knives if he doesn't wear an apron and thong and call her mama or mistress?

So, Angelina also said this week she only had sex with four guys, two of which she was married to. So, does that mean this knife guy is the fourth guy or was this just all about almost having sex, but not quite?

Where were the parents when the kids or kid were playing with knives at 14 and using them in a sexual way and in a way that got so out of hand that she has had to be more careful since.

Mary Kate Olsen In Harper's Bazaar