Wednesday, May 14, 2008
When Remy Ma was sentenced this week to eight years in prison I thought the relationship between her and her crazy boyfriend Papoose would end in a hail of glorious gunfire. OK, not really gunfire, but since Remy is going to jail for shooting someone I thought it was fitting. So MaPa which is my name for the couple are supposed to get married in jail this weekend. They initially wanted to have Ashlee and Pete get married with them in the jail, but Ashlee didn't want Remy's orange prison jumpsuit upstaging her own traditional white. Pete offered to wear a jumpsuit, but it just didn't work. Too bad really because I think Pimpa was looking forward to spending some time in a women's prison.
Although the above was a joke, I am serious about MaPa getting married this weekend. Would you actually marry someone who has just been sentenced to 8 years in jail? I know it won't actually be 8 years, and I mean it isn't like she is probably going to catch you cheating, or if if she does, that she can do anything about it, but would you marry someone knowing you wouldn't get to be alone with them for years and years?
I wouldn't do it. I think Remy would do it, because what does it matter to her? She can still have a prison wife. Papoose though is probably thinking about it long and hard, and it won't be happening this weekend, so he will have time to think. Seems in a visit yesterday he tried to smuggle in a universal handcuff key. They should have thrown him in jail, but instead just kicked him out.
"Here baby. Here's a handcuff key. After you get yourself unlocked, just try and make it past the 1500 guards and the barbed wire and the security gates and the two hundred other things to stop you. See how much I love you. This key will get you out."
Does he really think she's wearing the handcuffs 24/7? Idiot.