Thursday, June 12, 2008
I'm trying to picture in my mind how Neil Diamond would have been a thug running around Brooklyn when he was growing up. Neil told Blender magazine this month that he used to be in a gang and that he and his friends would roam the streets of New York each night looking for people to fight. I just can't picture it. What I do picture is some kind of hybrid mashup of West Side Story and Beat It.
All of the gang members in their matching satin jackets just beating the crap out of each other when all of a sudden the camera focuses on Neil and he starts singing Sweet Caroline. At first everyone keeps punching, but then they just can't stop and they soon join in. For an encore some guy breaks a mop in two, puts the mop on his head and he and Neil waltz around singing You Don't Bring Me Flowers.
When they finish, everyone has tears in their eyes and so the guys decide to have a group hug and talk out their problems.
Actually the way it ended for Neil was he got shot one night directly beneath one of his eyes and so he called it quits. The gun was just a pellet gun but it stung, and he needed a band-aid so that was it for his thug life.