Wednesday, July 16, 2008

So Much For True Love



So, two days in a row with Paris Hilton. I know, I know, but it is another really good one where she ends up looking stupid. I think we can all agree that Paris looking stupid and foolish is a good thing and we should encourage those kinds of posts.

Cristiano Ronaldo, better known as Ronaldo was in town last night recuperating from an injury. Now, for those of you who don't know who Ronaldo is, let me tell you. He is a soccer/football player for Manchester United and one of the best players in the world. He is also the guy who ended up with the women with some extra parts down in Brazil last month. In addition, he is currently going through another scandal in the UK because there are rumors he has broken up with his girlfriend of the past five months. She says no, but he doesn't say anything. Plus, to make things even more complicated, Ronaldo is traveling in LA with a female "assistant," who is allegedly helping him recover from his injury. Uh huh.

Well last night, Ronaldo is enjoying a club here in LA, when Paris Hilton who wants to be a WAG more than anything in her whole life spent the night trying to do anything to get him to notice her. According to the Daily Mail, "Paris was all over him. The moment he arrived, she went over to his private table."

"At one point, she pushed her chest together and made a point of trying to snuggle up against him."

She kept trying and trying and trying, and finally he just turned his back on her so she would get the hint. Paris didn't get the hint and then started trying to get in through a side door so to speak by trying to talk to some of the guys he was with and charming them. Hell, if she could be a WAG she would have probably done the whole table to get to Ronaldo. No luck. No one wanted anything to do with the wonky eyed one.

Now, all of these actions by Ms. Hilton would lead one to speculate that perhaps she is not so keen on Benji despite the fact that he looks good in a collar and leash. Now, Paris will probably try and tell him it was for work or some other crap, and you know what? Benji will agree, because that is one whipped guy. If Ronaldo had gone off with Paris last night, I guarantee you that in addition a scorching case of herpes, Ronaldo would have been stuck with Paris and she would be saying, "Benji who?"

32 comments:

moi said...

Cristiano Ronaldo isn't the guy who accidentally hired the tranny hookers, that's Ronaldo. They're two different people.

faithy said...

It was a different Ronaldo who was caught with the trannies. Please retract the comment.
This Ronaldo plays for Portugal and the tranny Ronaldo plays for Brazil.

Mooshki said...

Ugh, I don't even like the fact that he let her touch him at all. :( If it had been Iker, though, I would join up with Lainey to hunt her down and kill her.

littleoleme said...

So, what's a WAG?

sassafrass said...

dirty coochie.

sassafrass said...

I think it means Wives and Girlfriends.

Sylvia said...

So all that talk that she finally found her true love was all lies LOL. What a Parasite.

Sexecution said...

I am surprised Renaldo didn't go for her, square jaw, huge feet, massive hands... Maybe she needed to tape a dildo down there and he would have perked up a bit for shim. I have always suspected something wasn't right with Paris.

I would feel sorry for Benji being used as a prop, but he's using her for a prop as well. I doubt he's even doing her, who would risk that?

The Stowaway said...

Cristiano Ronaldo and Ronaldo are different people. The latter is Brazillian, and is the one who was caught with tranny hookers.

too said...

yeah, Enty...you've got your Ronaldos confused. Cristiano Ronaldo isn't known as Ronaldo. Ronaldo is another football player. Ronaldo was caught with the trannies, not Cristiano. Probably worth posting a correction to your article!

jax said...

who cares about either.

Reese said...

Feel free to keep brightening my day with posts where Paris is an ass and is rejected in public by someone she covets, Enty. These kinds of stories are the only way I want to hear anything whatsoever about Wonky McValtrax.

√Črica said...

There are three Ronaldos out there. The first two are brazilian, Ronaldo Phenomenon, the one who was caught with the trannies, Ronaldinho Gaucho, the one who plays for Barcelona and is being criticized for being overweight, and the portuguese Cristiano Ronaldo, who plays for Man United. The latter being the one who didn't care about Paris Hilton

KS said...

jax, plenty of people care about ronaldo. both of them. all three of them. soccer's pretty popular everywhere else. and it doesn't matter if people care about them or not, i wouldn't my name confused with someone who picked up a tranny prostitute bc we have the same last name and then for people to be like "who cares about either of them". obviously, some people do if enty wrote this and it was pretty big news a few months ago when the brazilian ronaldo got busted with the hookers.

Ayesha said...

Who else was it that spurned Wonky's advances? Was it Adrian Grenier?

And what about her true love Benji Madden?

jax said...

thanks Ks..still dont care.

april said...

I agree with Reese,- keep the nasty stories about Parasite coming!

kris said...

I agree with Jax...don't care.

juju said...

Cristiano Ronaldo is NOT Ronaldo!!!! one is portuguese the other is brazilian!!!

Lynne said...

EL wrote:
"a scorching case of herpes."

Thanks, EL. Ferris Bueller's Day Off. Jennifer Garner before the nose job.

KS said...

no prob jax, just wanted to point out that getting facts confused can lead to tarnished reputations by the uninformed.

Ernestine said...

I just don't care because it's about The Skank Who Shall Not Be Named trying to fuck some dude. Haven't we all heard this shit before?

*yaaaaawn.*

Dave said...

It's an insult to get the Ronaldo's confused. One is fat and one is a hunk.

BlahFrickinBlah said...

You can just smell her diseased vag though the pic. *shutters* If I were a guy, I wouldn't let my junk get near her either.

v said...

jax, for someone whose life is seemingly devoted to this blog, one would think you would care just a little bit about responsible journalism. Gossip website or not, that is a heck of an accuasation to make against someone when some simple fact checking would have cleared the mistake for enty. next thing u know, he'll be saying hugh jackman, or hugh laurie, or hugh hefner was arrested for picking up a tranny prostitute!

Donnie said...

seriously!! a mistake like that is worth posting a correction for enty!

sillyme said...

What does Jennifer Garner before the nosejob have to do with anything, Lynn? I hate when I can't follow the conversations.

Sara said...

silly me, she means Jennifer Grey.

junglekitten said...

Lol @ her pic!! I always thought she resembled some breed of bird but, THIS takes the cake!!! Btw, she's only w/ the troll sister because she desperately wants Nicole's life!! Sad excuse for a human being!!!

Lynne said...

sara, you're right. I meant Jennifer Grey. I had a ding-dong moment.

rufusjonz said...

as many mentioned -- this is a diff ronaldo -- this one is known as Christiano Ronaldo -- he is Portugese and is currently the best player in the world

the other one, is an older Brazilian who is nicknamed just "Ronaldo" --

this as opposed to "Ronaldinho", "Rivaldo", "Robinho", "Romario" and the other famous Brazilian "Fred" -- not kidding

The Dude Abides said...

I'm amazed that the falsehood is still up without correction 40 hours after originally posted. Especially seeing as Enty is an attorney.