Thursday, November 13, 2008

Ashley Cole's An Ass


So, let me get this straight. You did cheat on your wife with three different women. You admit that. Chances are it was probably more than that, but those are the only ones the newspapers discovered so of course you only admitted to those three.

Ashley Cole who as you may or may not know, and I have learned not to assume anything is in fact a soccer/football player in the UK who is married to Cheryl Cole who is in Girls Aloud which is a very popular Spice Girls like group in the UK and a judge on their version of American Idol, called X Factor. Ashley could have tried to sue the newspapers for libel, but he didn't because he knows he would get his butt kicked. So, instead of that, what he is planning to do is sue the newspapers at the European Convention of Human Rights because they don't have enough to do without acting as band aid for a bad marriage. His suit is going to be for an unjustified intrusion into his personal life. You have got to be kidding. Just think if he wins. That means there would be no gossip ever because anything bad would send people running to the Convention of Human Rights. You know them right? Aren't they the people who make sure people are getting treated fairly in prisons and by governments and that no one is dying because of neglect. Does that seem like a good use of this body?

Ashley. You screwed up. It happens. I am Mr. Screw Up. Get over it. Move on and get back with your lovely wife and just make sure it doesn't happen again.

10 comments:

Robyn said...

I followed this story.. he's just full of crap.. I still can't believe Cheryl took him back honestly.. she's pretty and talented and has her own pile of cash.. I'm sorry, but no matter how much I love someone a couple hair dressers later I couldn't fall asleep and wake up next to a cheater without trying to smother him.. a lot...

jessica said...

I used to work with one of his conquests (in a clothes shop!!) and she basically now makes a living from glamour modelling and selling kiss and tells. She is well known amongst footballers for this and the story about Ashley wasn't the first she's sold. He's such a idiot.

califblondy said...

Is he an answer to a blind?

I honestly did not know who he was, but I remember a blind about a soccer player screwing around.

I guess this means that Beckham isn't the answer to every soccer blind?

jax said...

shes is so beautiful,too bad her self esteem sux enough to stay with a cheating prick.

ms_wonderland said...

Ashley Cole sued and won before about an alligation he took part in 'gay sex acts' with other footballers. The story was they would set their cell phones to vibrate, wrap them in a condom and insert where the sun don't shine. (Not recommended for clamshells!) Then they would ring each other up....

Someone tried the human rights thing before and got nowhere. Don't forget the sluts have rights to tell their stories.

Uber*nought said...

Sometimes I wonder whether all these sluts selling stories isn't just a cover up for something else going on.

For example, waaay before Ashley and Cheryl got wed, Cheryl allegedly had an incident in a UK club toilet with a woman who claimed Cheryl called her racist names. Not long after that, Cheryl hooked up with Ashley Cole as Girls Aloud's star took off.


Just makes you go hhmmm......

ms_wonderland said...

Marriage of convenience, right there.

KellyLynn said...

Pffft. He's just like every other celebrity who wants people to talk about him, but then gets pissed off when he can't control what they're saying.

Amber said...

Cheryl deserves sooooo much better. I don't think the marriage was a cover-up for that toilet incident either. I think she dated black guys in high school. I know that b/c there was this Girls Aloud docu about all their lives before stardom and I had to watch it ok (hangs head in shame).

lanac said...

i hate cheryl cole! she is so mean to danni minogue who is awesome!!yeah danni has had surgery but shes open about it and obviously doesnt care. i would cheat on cheryl's ass too cuz its too orange.