Tuesday, December 02, 2008

Kirsten Dunst Has An Assistant?


You may or may not have seen the story yesterday about how Kirsten Dunst got a restraining order against an alleged stalker. I can't imagine why he would be stalking her, but apparently he has been found at her house several times over the past few months. Maybe he just wants his $2? Plus tip.

When I was reading the story, I just thought to myself that the guy could have done better with his stalking target. Hell, he probably didn't even need to stalk her. Just join a band and she will find you. But, what really shocked me was the fact that Kirsten has an assistant. What the hell does she need an assistant for? She does maybe one movie a year, and she doesn't seem to be in any kind of demand except for bachelor parties. Being her assistant must be the easiest assistant job in all of LA. Hell, the phone probably never rings except when Kirsten calls to make sure the phone really does work.

I think Kirsten just feels she makes enough money where she is expected to have an assistant. Probably she feels it is also better to have someone go out and buy her cigarettes and booze so that way she can pretend she is far too busy to do those kinds of "everyday people" things.

12 comments:

Anonymous said...

Kirsten is probably pretty high maintenance. I'm sure her assistant is kept busy with many things.

mooshki said...

Sigh... I will never get tired of the "Better Off Dead" references. Just one of the many reasons I love thee, Enty.

By "assistant," does she mean "dealer?"

MissMouse said...

"Just join a band and she will find you." That's gold Jerry! Gold!
... and so true. Yeah, I'm thinking the term 'assistant' in Kirsten parlance means 'person I can whale on when I'm high & grouchy' or something. She needs a personal dresser to keep her titties inside her dresses at the bars.

MontanaMarriott said...

Well she definitely doesn't want to score her own coke, and pick up her Valtrex prescription, that would be blow up her spot, lol

mooshki said...

Forget Valtrex, remember when she was snapped buying that poo tester kit at a drugstore? She probably hired an assistant 5 minutes after those pics hit the 'nets.

shakey said...

Poo tester kit? Why would you need to test your poo? Worms?

d said...

Yeah, what shakey said. Maybe one of those test kits for blood in your stool?

c17 said...

+1 with the Better Off Dead reference.

Lolz - maybe she took pity on Tara Reid and offered her a job - I can somehow see that being a new MTV reality show....G_D help us all.

mooshki said...

It was a 'Comprehensive Digestive Stool Analysis - "an advanced noninvasive diagnostic tool that can help practitioners improve prevention and target treatment strategies for gastrointestinal disorders."' Here's the pic. :)

mooshki said...

Oops, skip the above link - our own Bad Fish posted the pic too. :)

Anonymous said...

Thanks for the link, Moosh...I always did love using that picture of her. Sigh. If pics are worth a thousand words, that one was worth three: no. caption. needed. :)

shakey said...

No kidding. What kind of sick do you have to be to buy the home version of the test? Does she know how to treat herself for e-coli?

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