Travis Barker And DJ AM In Critical Condition

Shortly before midnight, in a plane carrying six people, four were killed and Travis Barker and DJ AM were critically injured. Both are in a burn unit of of a Georgia hospital.

When the plane was attempting to takeoff, it went off the end of the runway and crashed into a nearby road.

Two of the four people killed were crew members of the Lear Jet. The remaining two were passengers, but as I write this, their identities have not been released. The plane was headed back to Los Angeles.

I have certainly given both of these guys a hard time in the past, but now is not time for snark, it is time for prayers and best wishes, for them, their families, and the families of those killed.

For more on the story, click here.

Full Frontal Friday

So for this week, in honor of Katie Holmes and her stellar Broadway debut, I thought we would stick with Broadway. In this case, we have the Off Broadway show, "Take Me Out." For all of you, what this means is a group shower scene. Lots of men, soaping up in a theatre. Nice huh? Well, if you don't like naked men in the shower, then why the hell are you reading FFF anyway. I doubt it is for my writing. Anyway, click here to enjoy the photos, and of course bring your own soap.

Four For Friday

#1 & #2 - My worst possible nightmare, and your as well if you like the idea of sleeping at night. This C list actress who really has always done television and was on a very hit drama has B list name recognition. Well she and this a-hole former C list teen actor and now all around douchebag have started dating. If that wasn't bad enough, she's pregnant. I can't believe he is reproducing and that she let him get anywhere near her.

#3 - This divorce is getting nasty. Seems that this A list entertainer is a little upset at some of the things his soon to be ex-wife has been saying about him to the press. So, what has he done? Well, honestly, no one knows for sure it is him, but someone has been leaving various pieces of road kill on the front porch of her home and scattered around the yard as well. Seems his wife is a huge animal lover and so this has obviously been having a huge effect on her.

#4 & # 5- This B list actor/actress couple has been rumored to have called it quits. They have denied it. She has actually been in this space before because of a special international friend she has. Well the couple had come to an understanding about that as long as she was honest about where she was and who she was with. Well, next time she calls home she may want to step away from the guy making boarding announcements at the airport, especially if he is announcing a destination completely different from the place you told your husband you were going to be.

Random Photos Part One

Tired of all the damn smiley faces and other emoticons? Blame this guy who invented the smiley and frown on this day back in 1982. Wonder if he got any money for it?

This shot of Antonio Banderas took forever to take, because Melanie Griffith kept popping her head up over the rail.
Where else are you going to see Bob Balaban photos? Love this guy.

It is so good to see Amy Yasbeck out and about that I am going to give her a pass on the Miley Cyrus outfit.
The always, and I mean always lovely Alyssa Milano.
To me most people, a beach ball is just a beach ball. In the hands of Adrianne Curry, I'm not so sure. For what we know, Christopher Knight could have ended up strapped to it later that night.
Obviously Bryan Blatt has no issues with sharing the same surfaces as Adrianne. Of course he could have brought his own disinfectant, so we really don't know.
Where or where has Emilie de Ravin been? She looks better than she has in a long time.

Judging from the reaction on David Foster's face, someone from the paps must not have believed this was actually his daughter.
Cowboy Mouth - New York
I'm really surprised there have not been lots of stories hooking up Bar Refaeli with someone.
I'm sure Rebecca Gayheart must have been thrilled to know that Eric Dane and Balthazar Getty were hanging out alone together.
Do Julia Roberts' lips look a little more plump than usual?

One of my favorite photos of the day, Javier Bardem and Woody Allen.
Hey, Jason Alexander used to be someone, so he gets in the photos. Wow, two from Seinfeld so far.
George Lopez looks like any other guy who rushes up to Andy Garcia and says to someone, "hurry, take the photo."
Evan Handler has been in the photos before hasn't he?
I know Neal McDonough hasn't.

Or for that matter has Matthew Borlenghi.
Katie on Broadway.
Yeah, that outfit screams classy.
Jessica Simpson - Las Vegas
The Princess doing some really good work. No snark, as she does some press for an autism charity.

I gave serious consideration to placing Placido Domingo on the top, but I think he has been there before.
Some random Aussie celebrities at an event called "Pull A Beer For Prostate." Kind of fitting actually, especially if you have five or six.
Most people leave their blow up dolls at home.
Nikki Reed and Kristen Stewart who just got done filming Twilight.
The interesting possible couple of the day goes to Shannon Elizabeth and Simon Rex. Judging by the expression on her face, I would say Shannon reads FFF.

James Taylor and Glenn Close. Certainly random.
Rumer Willis, well just because you never know what she will look like next.
An up close look at some of her artwork.
And her two sisters.
Sarah Jessica Parker channeling a little Audrey Hepburn.

This must have taken a miracle. Or a lot of booze.
And the hug where the hands don't actually even touch the body.
Seal is always so damn happy. Oh yeah, he's married to Heidi Klum.
Zac Efron, because, hell I don't know. Someone must like him.

And if you show Zac, I guess you need to show Vanessa Hudgens also.
Next time Willie you get the top spot.
Annette makes sure Warren won't fall out of the chair.
Tim Robbins because I was thinking about Shawshank today. What, you don't think about it?

Your Turn

This week I got into a very long discussion with someone about how they didn't have to work in school, while I had to work my ass off. At that time I actually did have an ass that I was fairly proud of. I remember my first job was in a gas station convenience store type thing. I think I must have lasted there for about oh, three or four months. I think they got tired of all my friends coming by, and me helping myself to as much as I could eat in an 8 hour shift. The pay was minimum wage, and I figured they owed me since they wanted me to clean the bathrooms. I need to stress the word want. I would gather over my several months of employment that I never even set foot in one of the bathrooms.

Anyway, what was your first job?

A. Reader Takes Exception To A Post

I am always willing to give anyone the forum here to respond. I believe A. Reader makes some very valid arguments, although takes them to the nth degree. But, what I want to know, and what she doesn't address is, how is what the Playboy host did, anything different from what Howard Stern or any of the other similar type radio hosts do? They use the same language, make the same invitations, and also have nude people, yet no employees have sued. I think the issue here, is that line is very gray and fuzzy when it comes to this type of entertainment program and the people who work on it. Anyway, here is A. Reader.


Dear Enty,

Last weekend I went out on the Hollywood "scene" wearing a very short and tight purple dress with gold high heels. I knew that I was dressing in a way that would get me some attention from men. Obviously, because I was dressed this way, I knew I would probably get some sexual advances from these same men. Did I go out expecting to be raped? If in fact I was raped would I have deserved it because of the way I was dressed? I would hope your answer would be a resounding NO. But given your argument against this woman who worked for Playboy radio/TV, if I did not know you personally, I would have to question whether that would be the case.

When a stripper signs up to work at a strip club, she knows that she is entering into a workplace that is sexual in nature. Does that mean she expects to be witnessing her coworkers giving blow jobs? No. Your argument about the porn camera guy is a bit faulty: a guy who signs up to videotape porn KNOWS he will be watching people have sex on camera. But, unless it was specified in her contract, how the heck did this woman realize the degree of vulgarity she would be witnessing in her workplace? TMZ has info about how this producer was repeatedly asked to "wax the ass of co-host Christy Canyon." What jury in their right mind would nod their heads in agreement that this woman should've expected to be asked to do those kinds of things, given the subject matter of the show she was producing for? I don't disagree that maybe she should've expected her boss to, say, do some of the shows topless, but to be asked to touch her boss's breasts and genitals? Or watch her boss masturbate on camera? You don't REALLY think this is acceptable given that she works for Playboy TV, do you?

I don't think this woman is as stupid as you are portraying her to be in your analysis of the case. I have no doubt that she understood she would be in a workplace dealing with sexual material. But, as your reader Elizabeth said in the comments, there is a line, this goes beyond it.

Sincerely,

A. Reader

Nicole Kidman Had Morning Sickness - Still No Baby

Nicole Kidman is still talking about her pregnancy like it will make us all believe she really was pregnant. I'm still not buying it 100%. Are you buying it? She just never seemed, heavy. Her breasts never grew an inch, and she never really ballooned past anything more than a really heavy Thanksgiving meal.

In an interview with the Sun she says that she had incredible morning sickness. Life changing morning sickness. Of course all of this happened on the set of the film she just is by coincidence promoting now. Even though she was pregnant and sick, and pregnant, she struggled through 14 and 15 hour days because the film was so important. She had to finish the film, and baby be damned she was going to.

Yeah, ok. Look, here's what you do. Sure, it's invasive, and violates your privacy and shows we don't trust you farther than Tom Cruise can see over you, but I think you need to give us a DNA sample. That would be good. That would be a really nice start. A birth certificate would be good too. You know, something that shows you are the mother and it wasn't some surrogate or something like that. Then when you do that, I will sit at your feet and listen with awe and rapture as you take me through the first trimester and how difficult it was for you.

Until then, I really don't want to hear about pregnancy or any of your make believe stories about how you love Keith Urban, because I don't think you really do.

Hey FOX. Let Them Protest

I think this Roger Friedman guy from Fox News online must be about 100. At least I hope he is, because it is the only way I can allow him to get away with what he says about Anonymous.

Roger semi-reviewed Katie Holmes' and the play last night. I say semi-reviewed because, despite making the big bucks and having access to tickets, Roger decided to have some people go see the show for him. Well, whatever, he said that the show was great and that Katie Holmes didn't hurt or embarrass herself or the play.

Didn't hurt it, isn't the same as adding something to it either. I guess Tom did make his late entrance and help up the curtain time so he could take time to hear the applause from the Scientologists he brought along with him. Oh, yes he did, and apparently he even brought 20 more with him when he came into the theatre. They all sat down at once and were all wearing matching clothing. At the conclusion of the performance they all got down on their knees and bowed to Tom who then rose into the air and floated out of the theatre.

My main issue with Roger is that he says that the play is not about Scientology and that Anonymous shouldn't picket because it has nothing to do with the average theatre goer. That is crap my friend. They are just spreading the word and making sure that none of those audience members get snagged. By whom? Well, what about the audience members Tom brought along. Think they might have passed out a card or two? Is there a stress test booth set up outside the theatre?

I think you should protest where you know you will get the most attention to your cause. It goes without saying the #2 of the Church will probably be attending many performances, and as such, it is a really good idea to do it there.

Plus, you think the Scientologists weren't there doing their own thing? Check out the video below from Anonymous.

It Wasn't The Nightly News

Can you imagine if one day Robin Quivers from the Howard Stern show decided she was going to sue the show for being subject to a sexually hostile environment? Well, a producer from Playboy Radio sued Playboy because she felt she was subjected to a sexually hostile environment. Now, in full disclosure I want you to know that I have handled sexual harassment cases from the employer and employee side.

I am the first person to stand up and say something should be done. Playboy is like any other company, and just because it is a company primarily devoted to things of a sexual nature does not automatically give it a free pass. However, in this case, I think Playboy might just have a point.

The producer complained because she had to produce a radio show called Night Calls where people call in an discuss sex problems, and the host, in this case Christy Canyon helps out the callers and also is not averse to participating in some very hot, uncensored chat with the callers. Even more extreme than Howard Stern. So, the host tried to involve the producer in the show much as Howard involves people from where he works. The producer took exception to it and did not like the fact that Christy was talking dirty to callers or exposing herself even though it was being shot for Playboy TV.

The producer claims Canyon created a hostile environment by, among other things, "exposing her genitals and breasts to co-workers, making requests to guests and co-workers to touch her genitals and breasts and masturbating herself with her own hands as well as with various sex toys during live broadcasts of 'Night Calls.'"

Look, what did you think was going to happen when you signed up for this? Did you think someone from Playboy was just going to read about North Korea and its nuclear program? To me, this is just common sense. It is a sex radio show and television show. You are going to see nudity. It would be like some camera man on a porn set suing for being subject to a hostile sexual environment. He volunteered to be there for it, just as this producer volunteered and was getting paid to produce a radio sex show which was also being filmed.

This is not Jay Leno. If you want quiet, go to NPR. To me this one is ridiculous. If she were to win it would allow my absurd example of a porn cameraman to be able to sue, and win filming porn claiming it was a hostile environment.

Throwing Your Kid Under A Bus - Right Or Wrong?

It's kind of strange when a father and a son get arrested for drug possession and the dad gets lawyered up first. When that happens, the lawyer wants to make a big splash and get his name in the press. So, when Ryan O'Neal got sprung from jail first by his publicity hungry lawyer, you knew something was going to happen. What happened though was that Ryan basically shoved his kid under a bus.

Ryan's lawyer said, "The drugs found were not his, he would never use them. We know that when all the facts come out, he should not be charged with any crime here. He's tried to lead a peaceful life - he's acting and he's caring for his family, and this is the last thing he ever wanted or expected."

Well, basically then if you are saying they are not Ryan's then by deduction they either must be Redmond's or Tatum's from when she visited last Christmas. Yeah, like drugs would last longer than a couple of minutes in that house. So, should a dad throw his son under a bus to save his own ass? Now, some of you may say that Redmond deserves some serious time behind bars, and that it is tough love. Good point, but remember allegedly the drugs were just sitting out in the living room in plain view, so Ryan must have known they were there. He was at home when the cops came. So, is the tough love only applicable when both are facing time in jail? Doesn't Ryan have some kind of responsibility to make sure the drugs are not being used in his own home?

Mooshki - Movie Review - Lakeview Terrace

Before getting to the movie, I have to say that this was a very interesting theater experience. There was more security than I’ve ever seen at any preview screening. At least 6 security guards, including one 6'2" 350lb bouncer-type guy, two with metal detectors, and all very serious and doing thorough searches. I couldn’t figure out why they were so unusually concerned with piracy for this movie, then I realized they were probably worried about violence stemming from the interracial theme. The crowd I saw it with was mixed race, and as far as I could tell everyone was just having fun watching the movie - I don’t think there was anything serious enough about it to incite strong emotions. Anyway...

Lakeview Terrace tries to be both a thriller and a commentary on race and class issues, and does an okay but not great job with both. It raised some interesting questions, but never really went anywhere with them. I think the fact that there were some good moments lifted my expectations and then I was disappointed that it didn’t live up to them. If it had been a straight-up thriller it would have been forgettable, but perhaps a more satisfying movie-going experience. Samuel L. Jackson’s character and performance were a lot more subtle and varied than I expected from the preview. Patrick Wilson and Kerry Washington were good as the feuding neighbors, but their characters weren’t very well developed, and I had trouble feeling any empathy for the guy. For the most part the supporting cast was wasted, except for Regine Nehy, who plays Jackson’s daughter - she was the most real character in the film for me, and her relationship with her father was the most complex and emotionally affecting. And I swear they called up Justin Chambers and said “as long as you’re already playing Alex Karev, you wanna come do him for a few minutes in our movie? I guess I’d recommend it if you’re a Samuel L. Jackson fan, as he’s always fun to watch, but otherwise it’s nothing special.

Ted C Blind Item

Oh, this is a tough one this week: Do we do the cable star who's pretending to have a stalker (she's sending herself all kinds of horrendous things at work, just so her contract-renewing bosses think the babe's got heat, as if package-sending retards, imagined or otherwise, are going to make a difference in their decisions, oh, please)?

Or the star who screws around like John McCain once did. Hey, it's political fever time out there, I vote for the latter! But first, gotta say something. You know, I really think a lot of you frisky folk out there are getting the wrong impression: That I think only gay guys pull the really self-hating, sleazy, deliciously kinky love crap. Hardly! You hets sure know how to get your skank on, too, hon-pies, of this, I am positive. Certainly, Gore-Me Garth proves this point excellently. A star of the screen's more, shall we say, gruesome tales, Garth-babe's been pulling some love exercises, off camera, that surely would make his wife's blood boil.

Zoom in on: A somewhat established Sunset Strip bar. It's empty, save the bartender (our source, like, duh), and Gore-Me and some chick he is not married to. She looks kind of exotic. GMG just looks horny. I think his pants are tenting, it's real under-the-bleachers kinda stuff. The couple who thinks they are so secretly flirting with each other orders buttloads of whiskey sours, which, perhaps—or not—explains why they then start acting like Toothy Tile in a West Hollywood parking lot, as they move to a couch and do what probably took John McCain at least a second date to do with Cindy. For hours. In front of the bartender!

Like, what, they thought booze-servers are priests or something? Did they think the uniformed type wouldn't blab? Now, I don't know how far, exactly, Gore-Me and his sultry lass went, but if we got another Reille Hunter type sitch in the works, wouldn't be at all surprised.

And It Ain't: Will Smith, Dylan Walsh, Josh Brolin

Today's Blind Items

Which A list comic funny man film star needs to keep a closer eye on his wife? Seems that she has taken a very keen interest in the agent who lives next door. Everytime his wife leaves town and our funnyman leaves town, these two never spend a second apart.

Random Photos Part One

Cilla Black gets the top spot today, and I think she looks fabulous. To walk the runway, in what she is wearing takes a ton of guts so she would have probably got the top spot anyway. Being Cilla Black just makes it a given.
Brian Welch and his book which I hope has a chapter on how to take care of crazy ass hair.
Alyson Hannigan, well just because she looks good, and honestly, the pickings were limited today. Anytime there are three photos of Renee Zelwegger in the photos, no matter what kind of good reason you may have, you know things are slim.
Case in point. The new dad, David Spade. Although I will admit I did look everywhere today for a video of David I could embed from one of his first characters on SNL where he played an assistant to Dick Clark. The "And You Are?" post was a tribute to David.

Well that is one way to really get a view of the combover.
I was just so shocked that David Arquette dressed normally.
I will say this for Charlize Theron. If she loves you and believes in your work she will go all out. She has done everything in her power to plug Stuart Townsend's new film. Yes, she's in it, but she has been everywhere for this thing, unlike Andre 3000 who is also in it.
Cheech & Chong - Los Angeles

Lynda Lopez gave birth last month. Next month she is going to ride in a 10,000 mile bicycle race.

It was supposed to be an 80's theme roller skate party put on by Kate Middleton. They all got the leg warmers, but some Pat Benatar hair cuts would have also been nice.
Glasvegas - Manchester, UK
The entire Harris clan.
Denzel has not changed at all even since grade school.
Just because I have not seen Michelle Rodriguez in awhile.

Marg Helgenberger's face seems to be leaning to the left. She may want to have that checked.
Not going to let that meal ticket get away. Nick Cannon is like the male Melanie Griffith.
You can imagine what happened in the next photo of Mischa Barton which I'm not going to show. You are at work. You are suffering enough.
Needless to say, I guess she wasn't expecting it.
Ray Liotta and Val Kilmer must be buffet buddies.

Oliver Hudson protecting himself as only a man can.
Neil Patrick Harris always looks good.
And a hip check later and Naomi Campbell has the runway to herself again.
Interesting. Marisa Tomei and Eric Mabius.
Wow, even Wilmer looks less man-whorish than usual.

Ahhh, yes, I gave you some Viggo Mortensen.
And apparently Viggo is not above going for a little look see.
But he can do much better than Renee.
Who has mastered the fake flattery thing.

Lainey Blind Item

How does he roll?

Private plane on someone else’s dime with specific requests about the type of aircraft…like it’s not enough to bypass commercial flying, you need to fly in a particular model. But that’s just the beginning.

He can only travel in matching (like MATCHING!) SUVs with police escort. Three of them. One left empty. And then a sedan. Why the sedan? Because his lower level staff are not allowed to ride in SUVs. They are beneath SUVs. His staff must also stay in a hotel separate from his.

Then there’s eye contact. No eye contact under any circumstances. If his driver happens to have to idle for more than 15 seconds with him in the car – say they’re packing up gear, or waiting for a delivery – the driver must exit the vehicle until the fleet is ready to move.

Speaking to him of course is out of the question. Speaking in his vicinity is even worse. The only voice he wants to hear is his own. You can talk…but only when he gives you permission. There’s actually a hand signal for that. It comes from his manager.

Hotel staff learn this lesson quickly. Imagine asking someone if he wants fresh towels and have him stare back at you, behind sunglasses, not answering, the silence filling up the room like a flood, how small that person must feel, that person who works and busts her ass for minimum wage, not even to be acknowledged, to feel the message from a millionaire that she is not worth engaging? Not even a nod?

If he walks past you in the hall, you must turn your back. If you don’t turn your back he’ll stop walking. His team will stand in a wall around him for fear that you might breathe on him. Worse still, they will harass you. They will intimidate you. They will treat you like a criminal and report you to make sure you are punished.

All of this and more, communicated without shame, without embarrassment, executed as though it’s the most natural way to behave … these are His Rules.

John Edwards Sucks

You know, Most of the time for some reason we, and when I say we, I mean we, as in all of us, tend to look at an affair as the woman being the homewrecker. As has been pointed out to me by FW many times, there are always two people involved, if not more who should share blame equally. Everyone rags on Sienna Miller, but no one ever goes off on Balthazar. We should, but we don't. I mean if it wasn't for Balthazar saying yes, then it wouldn't have happened.

I was reading this first interview Elizabeth Edwards gave with the Detroit Free Press and the one thing that struck me was this quote. "Trust [is] probably the most difficult hurdle." This is a woman who is probably going to die very soon. Should she be having to deal with trust issues regarding her husband? Why would he put her in this position? At this time in her life she should be able to focus solely on her children and all the time she can devote to them. I mean she has a 10 year old and an 8 year old and I'm sure would rather be thinking of them and doing things with them, and not having to discuss whether she trusts her husband or whether she has forgiven him.

Look cheating is awful, but I think we all know and accept that it happens. We don't like it and we abhor it, but I think we can all acknowledge it happens. What I just find utterly abhorrent about this is that his wife is dying and he still had to get his dick taken care of. I don't mean to be crass, but isn't there plenty of time for whoring it up after your wife has passed? Don't you think you should be devoting your energies more to her, and to comforting your kids and helping them cope with this, rather than trying to find a place you can be alone with someone for a quickie?

I just don't think that there is anything John Edwards could do to redeem himself in my eyes. The woman has stage 4 breast cancer and he is off having sex with who knows how many people.
I'm not perfect. Not even close. But, in my mind there does not seem to be anything lower or more disgusting than doing something like that to the woman you have spent your life with, who gave birth to your children, and who has always been your biggest supporter while she is trying to fight for her life.

Tonight's The Night

After months and months of rehearsal, thousands of miles flown, and two burned out auditors it's finally time for Katie Holmes to make her Broadway debut tonight in front of Tom Cruise who will probably rush from his seat the moment the play ends, run up on the stage, and talk to the audience for a good twenty minutes. Don't blame Tom for this. He hasn't heard applause in a long time and so he likes to take advantage of it. It's why he keeps going to football games. He closes his eyes and pretends they are clapping for him.

Although tonight is considered just a preview of the show and not opening night, lets face it, Katie isn't going to change much between now and then. Sure, the critics officially will not have their say until the middle of October, but if Katie sucks, she might not even make it to the middle of October, but be called away due to a family emergency or a once in a lifetime film role which will mysteriously vanish in a few months when all of this settles down.

Whatever tonight brings in the way of Katie being good or not is really not relevant. We know that tonight is a chance for Tom Cruise to shine, and to steal whatever spotlight he can. Think of him getting ready for tonight. Finding just the right Spanx to put on, the right pair of heels and that three piece sweater vest combo that only he seems to enjoy. Whether Katie is good or bad, Tom knows it will be his photos all over the papers tomorrow.

He Has An Entourage?

A couple of weeks ago when Gary Coleman had that little spat with a photographer outside of a Salt Lake City bowling alley I really didn't care. I read one article and just blew it off. Today, the news comes out that Gary was charged with reckless driving and disorderly conduct. Still not interested. But, as I kept reading I noticed two things that were kind of shocking.

First, Gary is apparently still married to that woman despite all those announcements they had broken up. I only hope Gary has finally got rid of that pesky cherry of his. It was also interesting to note that Gary Coleman has an entourage. How bottom of the barrel in the entourage world are you, if you are part of Gary's entourage. "Yeah, I used to be with Dustin Diamond, but he let me go."

Usually someone in an entourage gets paid a little something for the effort you know. For pretending to actually like the person you are with. So, either Gary Coleman made a lot more off those check cashing commercials than I thought he did or his wife is paying off the entourage in her own special way and Gary is still a virgin.

One Whole Night

Star is reporting in their latest issue that Nicole Richie left Joel Madden. Yes she did. How long did she stay gone? One night. Apparently she spent more time packing up all her crap and loading it into the car then she did actually outside of the house. Star doesn't report who the hell unloaded all the stuff from her car wherever the heck she went, then put it back in her car in the morning when she left and then finally back where it all started. By that time she probably didn't even care and so probably no one did unload it and it is all piled high in the back seat of her car, hiding Harlow from view whenever they go out.

Apparently it all started when the happy couple were in New York for Fashion Week. For some surprising reason, Joel didn't want to go to anymore fashion shows or sit around and talk about next season's hottest new styles and instead went to the Video Music Awards. Nicole was pissed and felt that Joel should have given up more of his manhood and stayed with her.

Joel, sitting next to, and cuddling Mischa Barton at an after party and being caught on film didn't make Nicole very happy either. Well, it wouldn't make me happy either Nicole if I were a woman. I mean if Joel thinks Mischa Barton is a step up, then I would be pretty pissed as well. Although Joel could be moving backwards. He was with Hilary Duff, then Nicole Richie. If he moved onto Mischa Barton, the only lower rung would be Denise Richards, and then you turn to guys.

Too Bad Tatum Wasn't There

Tatum O'Neal had to open her mouth today to talk about her dad and her brother being arrested yesterday for alleged possession of meth. She could have kept quiet, but hey, she has books to sell, so she made some calls until she found someone who wanted to hear what she had to say.

"Addiction, if untreated, can lead to jail, institutions and death. I love them both, and I am sorry to hear about this."

That's it? That's all she wanted to say? Nothing else? How come with her dad and her brother it is addiction, but when she was arrested earlier this year it was all about dealing with the grief of her dead goldfish or dog or whatever it was. Remember she had not touched the stuff in years, but the dead hamster or gerbil or whatever three months earlier had finally triggered her need to go out and buy some drugs.

Well, maybe Ryan and Redmond had a canary die and so are turning to meth to relieve their grief. I can just see Tatum so prim and proper reciting that line. And does anyone really think she loves her dad? Come on. Sure she would do a line or two with him for old times sake, but she doesn't love him as in visit every Christmas or probably even call him on Father's Day. But, if you were ever wondering what they do at family reunions, now you know. Most people bake pies and cakes and food. The O' Neals go on back behind the house and cook up some meth for everyone.

And You Are?

When you think of stars who can clear a red carpet area of press and make sure no photos taken of their arrival, I doubt the first person on your lips is going to be Ashlee Simpson. Tell me again what she has done. She has had a couple moderate successes and one huge flop of an album. She is married to a guy in a very good band but not a great band and is pregnant.

So how is it that Ashlee Simpson basically had every other celebrity at the New Dreams event cleared off the red carpet prior to her arrival and they had to stay off the red carpet until after she was inside? In addition, all photographers were ordered out of the arrivals area also. Ashlee would only attend the event if the limo could drop her off at the door, and not have to encounter anyone.

Umm, you suck Ashlee. You are not a very good signer. You are an average singer. Your reality show sucked. You don't seem to have any future career prospects and yet, you are acting like this. Even Mariah Carey wouldn't do this. Yes, she is a press whore so that might not be the best example, but when you go to an event, especially a charity event that uses its funds to fight against the sex trafficking industry, they would like people to know you support it by getting your photo taken as you arrive. It is the point of a red carpet. By you shunning the media, you are basically saying that you don't want anyone to know that you support the group that is fighting against sex trafficking. Why would you do that?

Is no one allowed to take any photos of you at events until the baby is born? Did Pimpa set something up where only the pictures he takes and sells get used? Was Pimpa not available the other night? Ashlee, you just aren't that special, and even if you were the diva of divas, and entitled to that status, why would you refuse to help in this cause? Makes no sense to me and makes you look like a spoiled brat, which of course you are.

Nooooooooooooooooooooooooo!!!!!!!!

Just when I thought it was safe to turn on my television again, it turns out that E! didn't have any more trashy women left to start their own television show so they told Denise Richards she could have another year. That, and I think Ryan Seacrest threw a tantrum and called down the ghost of Merv Griffin to haunt the place unless Ryan got his way.

Denise broke the unhappy news to the world a couple of days ago when she was walking the red carpet. Apparently filming is set to begin in a few months. Denise was asked to give her well wishes to Charlie and Brooke on their new child. She wouldn't even do that. I mean how evil do you have to be that you would not send someone your best wishes on the birth of their child. I don't care how much you hate two adults, or how much you despise them, would you ever not want the child to be healthy and for everything to proceed without complications. Is your heart that icy? Yeah, I know it is Denise we are talking about.

"I am not commenting on that situation. I hope one day get to a place but I'm not commenting right now."

All she had to say was something positive about the baby. Instead she goes off on one of her weird babbling comments. Oh, and as for reality on her show? Umm, not so much. Unlike some shows where the cameras are there 24/7, the cameras in Denise's show only were there certain days and times which were set out far in advance. That way they could work on the scripts, Denise could find someone to actually come over who wanted to see her, etc.

Daily Mirror Blind Item

Which famous socialite was caught by a girlband member doing heroin?

The pop singer couldn't believe her eyes and quickly scurried away to tell her pals.

Today's Blind Items

#1 - What film brother/sister duo in an upcoming blockbuster film are having to keep their relationship secret because of fears that the general public will not make the distinction between film and real life?

#2 - I don't know if this B+/A- heart throb actor is dating this B- list film actress with A+ name recognition, but it didn't stop them from having sex in a limo on the way to a film. Just wondering if the driver got photos.

Random Photos Part One

My favorite stereotypical socialite is back. Muffie Potter Aston. I honestly thought I would never get to see her again, but here she is so she makes the top spot. If you were going to write a spoof movie on socialites, Muffie Aston would be a name to choose. Does anyone else know anyone named Muffie?

I'm just a Billy Bob fan, what can I say? He is probably in the top ten of people I would love to hang out with for a night.

You know what is worse than being labeled a guest in pap photos? Not being labeled at all, especially if you actually showed up with someone which she did.
Well it is Billy Bush, so nothing he does at this point would surprise me.
Andy Richter almost got the top spot. He was at the relaunch of Morton's Steakhouse and as you can see Andy, like me comes prepared to eat.
Still don't like Dakota Fanning but it has been awhile so, here she is.

And I'm sure that box is on ebay this morning.
If seeing Blake Lively once is not enough.
How about Blake and Lori Lively.
Whenever Jimmy Fallon wears a tux, I always expect him to be holding up a card like a limo driver.

This is a breakfast radio show in London, but Gordon Ramsay does look tanked doesn't he?
How come I like posting photos of Gayle King but not Oprah?
Wow, you don't see Ethan Embry for a couple of months and he goes bald. Join the club buddy.
Hope Ted Danson and Patrick Dempsey like each other. I'm surprised Patrick's publicist didn't send over a biking photo or Patrick posing in spandex in front of a mirror.

Jordan Pruit - New York

Jennette McCurdy makes her first appearance in the photos.
I once thought Jude Law should have been the next Bond. I was wrong.
Jon Lovitz and Kristy Swanson would make an interesting couple.
Nut John Lovitz and Tim Allen would make a much more interesting couple.
Maria Bello and her, is that a butterfly on her top?

Lucia Mendez - Miami
Well it is a random photo. I mean Lance Bass and Anna Faris together is pretty random.
Yeah. I'll let all of you handle this one.
Jane Seymour and her daughter.

Matt & Kim - New York

The always lovely Melora Hardin
Does Mariska Hargitay look different to you also?
I didn't notice Brian Austin Green anywhere. Did any of you see him at the premiere of his girlfriend's film?
Hey, in a couple of years they can do meth together and ride in the back of a police car.
How about Robert Buckley to be a Bond, or a criminal at least?

One of my favorite names ever. Piper Laurie.
See that bruise on Olivia Palermo's arm? Yeah. Not a good place. Now everyone will be whispering. "Oooh, she's the girl, with the you know bruise on her arm from_____."
Oscar de la Renta looks great.
The very pregnant Michelle Monaghan.
Why not, it has been a few weeks since I had Shia in here.

She is getting a Swedish fish tattooed on her arm. I'm thinking of getting a tattoo right there also of my favorite drink recipes.
Selma Blair actually looks good. Stoned, but good.
Tell me again why someone as cool as Robin Wright Penn stays with Sean Penn.
I normally like Rosario Dawson, but the practice of taking entire tubes of lipstick and applying them to said lips has to stop.

It's Fun For The Whole Family

So, when Ryan O'Neal and his son Redmond were arrested today for drug possession, it probably brought a tear to all the dads out there who were wondering how they could find a way to spend such quality time with their own kids. It takes a special kind of dad to get booked with your kid. Both father and son were arrested for drug possession when the cops came in to check on Redmond who is on probation. Well, Redmond allegedly had some drugs on him, and then when the cops went into Ryan's room they allegedly found some meth there.

As much drugs as this family has done you would hope they would just produce it themselves in the backyard or something. Can you even take a guess at how much money the entire O'Neal clan has spent on drugs and drug rehab? It is probably in the millions. But hey, what are a few million really when you can share the back of a police car with your son?

That's A Shocker

Mariah Carey told Now Magazine that she has only ever read one book. What is the book you ask? If you guessed the Bible, then you win the I will believe anything ever written award. I have no trouble believing that Mariah Carey doesn't read. I do have a hard time wading through the crap that we are supposed to buy that the only time she has ever read a book is when she reads the Bible. Yes, I said reads. Apparently Mariah always makes time for the Bible in her life.

I'm sure churches around the globe are now panting at the thought of Mariah coming to their church to spread the Gospel according to Mimi. No doubt she will wear something suitable for the occasion.

I don't understand why she just couldn't say that she doesn't read anything and had to go ahead and make herself appear to look like this God fearing woman. Just tell the truth. I also noticed that the interviewer didn't ask a great followup question which would be something like which passage do you enjoy the most, or what book in the Bible did you especially enjoy or come back to. The reason the interviewer probably didn't ask the followup question is that he was laughing so hard he couldn't breathe and probably had to stop the interview right there.

Lynne On Britney - Not Like It Sounds

Four Seconds Still Seems Long

In an interview while doing press for his new film RockNRolla, Guy actually talked about his sex life with Madonna. Now, I for one as soon as I read that sentence, try and close my eyes and have any images removed before burning my retinas. I have just never found Madonna attractive. I have liked her music through the years, but never once have I said to myself she is someone I would want to have sex with. Ever. Doesn't do it for me. Hey, I know it's my loss.

Guy mentioned a scene in his new film where Gerard Butler and Thandie Newton have a quickie. When asked why he chose to leave the scene in, he should have said," because I filmed it you moron. If I didn't think it would be important to use it in the film, I wouldn't have bothered to get the two of them naked for the camera."

But, what he actually said because he is more polite than I would have been is, "It’s over in four seconds. Best type of sex that."

Yes, it is especially if you are married to Madonna. You can probably hold your breath for that long if need be. Now, if you are trying to last longer than four seconds, well, then that really is only the best sex for one person. You. Not that I find there is anything wrong with that, but several of the ex wives and girlfriends took issue with it. Hey, it isn't a rodeo. I don't have to stay on for 8 seconds to feel like a winner.

Hey Paris How's Rwanda?

Remember last year when Paris Hilton went on Larry King and lied her little ass off? Well, I'm assuming it is little. Is it large? Has anyone bothered to check lately? Anyway, when she went and lied to Larry, and Larry just opened wide Paris made a big point about how she was going to do charity and this and that and going to go to Rwanda and jail changed her and she never used drugs.

Well, right after the program, she started making arrangements to go to Rwanda, but then the people that were going to pay her bazillions of dollars to go decided instead to spend it on worthwhile things like medicine and food for the kids. Then, when Paris found out the only mirrors in the entire country were on the cars and trucks, she just said it was too much and made some kind of crap excuse why she couldn't go. I believe she said that she would go when it was safe or other famous people went or something like that.

So, what made me think of this today? Because there is an interview and some photos today of Scarlett Johansson who just spent four days in the country visiting AIDS clinics with RED. Seems to me that RED is a great group and would have loved to have Paris along. Oh, I know it would have been inconvenient and that Paris would have actually had to keep a promise or follow through on something other than being a leech of biblical proportions.

On a side note, no one really knew Scarlett was in Rwanda until she was on her way back. If Paris had gone she would have filmed the entire thing and sold it as a reality show and would have beat her chest and announced to the world what a great citizen she is and that all people throughout the land should bow down to her and then go eat some cake.

That Relationship Is Done

Christina Fulton who is the mother of Nicolas Cage's eldest child (pictured above)was supposed to get hitched this weekend in Norway to Stian Tomt Thoresen. Apparently unable to accurately spell his name, Christina instead decided to call off the wedding until she was more comfortable with her Norwegian. Of course, that isn't the reason they gave for calling it off. Oh no. The couple of course had the standard we are too busy thing excuse.

"We both have very hectic schedules, with Christina's upcoming reality show and (Dimmu Borgir's) new DVD, which is coming out this fall. There was simply too much going on at the same time."

Ummm, you are supposed to get married in three days. Presumably you had this calendared in advance. "Yeah, can't really make it for coffee that day. Getting married. Well, they do make a good espresso. Tell you what. Let me see if I can postpone this wedding thing."

See. This is the end of the relationship. Sure, they make it sound like it is just a delay, but lets face it. If you don't go through with it, then its over. I'm not talking about some kind of freak injury or a mother who drinks too much. This is just the couple saying, ummm, maybe this isn't working and we should call it off before we end up marrying and this becomes a lifetime thing of having Nicolas Cage and his bad hair in my life forever.

Now, I think they did the smart thing in calling it off, but I'm sure they pissed off a whole bunch of people who were already in the country for a wedding. Nicolas was going to attend as well as Jim Carrey, Rob Zombie and Patricia Arquette. They can afford the inconvenience. But, what about the other relatives? Do you think they wanted to go to Norway for a vacation? Maybe they wanted to go to Paris or to Hawaii, but no, Christina just had to get married in the most expensive country in the entire world.

I'm using Christina as the scape goat because presumably Stian's friends and family actually live in Norway since he is from there and lives there. But as for the demise of the relationship, probably Stian, since it was his people that put out the statement.

R. Kelly Is Viable

Didn't realize a human could be viable, but apparently if you are R. Kelly you can be. In a long, self serving interview with BET, R, or as he likes to refer to himself Robert answered everything from questions about loving underage girls to blackmail. Incidentally, Robert. When you refer to yourself constantly in the third person, then switch to first person, and use different names to identify yourself in the third person, you really are not doing any favors to yourself. Because as of right now, it sounds like you and three other guys are teaming up on a bunch of teenage women.

When the interviewer asked about Robert's preference for teenage girls, Robert replied, "I like teenage girls. I have some that are 19, but none are younger than that." Uh huh. I guess the 41 year old singer keeps a bevy of them around just in case the cops show up. Who the hell says I have some? Like he just kind of rotates through them daily. Are you really trying to tell me there are a bunch of 19 year old girls sitting around Chicago waiting patiently for their turn on the R. Kelly love stick?

Kelly says that everything that has ever been said about him that is hurtful has been done as blackmail and by people who had a self serving interest. Everything mind you. See, R. Kelly is a saint and he has never done anything wrong. So, anything you ever hear bad about him comes from someone who doesn't love Robert and who is only using him.

And why are all these people saying all these bad things about Robert if they are not true.

"I've been blackmailed a billion times in my career... I know that people will do this. Sometimes, yeah, even your own family members, and I don't hate none of them but I know a lot of people be (sic) out to get me because I'm very viable."

Yeah, like an embryo. Oh, wait, he wouldn't be interested in that. Probably too old.

Daily Mirror Blind Item

Which TV star is on the verge of being dumped by his hot girlfriend? The unlucky-in-love presenter's bedtime demands are just too kinky for this girl next door...

Today's Blind Items - Jackass

I guess this actor would be considered A list because he does have a franchise. I would call him more B+ list. He is not married currently. He has really begun to change from the funny, sweet guy he was always portrayed in the media to be. Lately though he has snapped at people quite frequently. A couple of weeks ago there was a prime example of this. Our actor took his car to be washed. Well, at this particular car wash, the attendants vacuum and do other things prior to the car going through the wash. Most patrons just go inside and wait. Not our actor who stayed with them every second and made them do everything three or sometimes four times. The lines of cars backed up because of the actor was about 20 deep. After he was satisfied, they moved the car into the wash. The actor went inside to watch through the viewing window. That lasted as long as it took for the car to actually go through the jets of water. After that, the actor went inside the washing area and made sure the attendants got every spot washed and wiped and clean. What should have been ten minutes turned into 30, all because this actor was out of control. Finally, someone in management noticed the line of cars and ordered the actor out of the area. When he refused, they moved his car out, and told him to leave and never come back.

Random Photos Part One

I think there is probably some unwritten Blogger rule that if Desmond Tutu comes to your town and walks a red carpet that you are required to put him at the top of the photos. Heck, he deserves to be at the top, red carpet or not.
Yeah, I could go there, but I won't. I mean he could go there too, but he would have to jump. Is that a cell phone camera in his hand?The person with the longest legs in the world meets the shortest man in the world.
Well, I think we should all be hoping that Amy Poehler's baby takes forever to come into this world because when the baby does arrive, Amy is departing SNL, never to return.
Two straight events, and Ben Stiller has yet to really crack a smile. Nice suit though.

I know, I know. I'm a straight male with a Krispy Kreme fetish, but yet, I do know that at least three of my divorces were a direct result of my wives spending too much money on shoes. I'm probably wrong, but this is Britney yesterday.
And this is Britney last year. Same shoes? As much as she goes out, you would think she would find the time to buy a new pair.
I think I tore something just looking at these photos.
The sad thing is, both of the people above I believe were just auditioning. They are not even actually in this circus.
Diane Lane looks amazing as always.

Dane Cook may not be funny, but I will admit he is a good looking guy. He can't act either though, so we really need to find a profession he could excel at.
Perhaps he could be the new gigolo for Jocelyn Wildenstein who used to be Catwoman, and is apparently trying to transform into an actual cat.
I'm surprised her boy toy can even stand, because if I were him, I would have needed about 20 of those mojitos before I would be taking her back to her place no matter how much she was paying me.

Josh Lucas, because hey, it's Josh Lucas.

Last time Jack Black wore this jacket I made some crack about birds crapping on it, but at night, it looks kind of cool.
The newlyweds this time actually acted like newlyweds on the red carpet. There was even tongue.
I think this is the first time I have ever seen Gwyneth Paltrow show any kind of affection to any human being.
Wasn't she in The Funeral or something like that with David Schwimmer? And didn't they have a thing for each other? Yeah, that's probably why it made $4.

I'm tired of Robert Downey Jr. photos also, but at least I didn't post any of Anne Hathaway who did a one woman red carpet at her premiere, or Kate Hudson at her premiere. Besides, I wanted to have one photo of Robert without the stache.

Richard Dean Anderson is amongst the living again.
Priscilla in London. How do they walk in those shoes?
Doing more charity work. Who thinks Nicole would be doing it if Joel wasn't pushing her?
Lea Thompson, her husband, and daughter.
Just because I like Vanessa Williams and America and don't get tired of looking at them.

For those of you not in the US, you should consider yourself lucky. For the past year, everytime I turn on the radio, I have to listen to Tanya Roberts extol the virtue of a timeshare company in Vegas. I used to like her until those commercials. Now, I cringe whenever I hear her name. I hope she got paid a lot, but she probably just got 3 days and 2 nights in a condo on the strip with a free show. Can you say high roller baby?
Stevie Wonder - Rotterdam
When action stars get puffy.
Man I want to look like Richard Gere at his age. Instead, I will probably look like the Staypuff Marshmallow Man.

Shannen Wants More Money

Want to see Shannen Doherty more on 90210? Well, apparently most people do like seeing her on the show and is one of the reasons people are tuning in. I guess she knows it as well, and has decided to take the "give me more money" road. Last week the CW announced in the open that they wanted Shannen to return. Thinking this might soften her resolve at wanting more money.

Not from what I understand. Shannen is perfectly happy to do the show or not do the show, but, if she is, then she wants to get paid. Yes, she is loving being the center of attention again, but she also know that she survived without it for a long time and so, it is going to have to be put up or shut up time over at the network.

Since Jennie Garth just signed an extension to do more episodes, Shannen at least will know how much she needs to make to be the highest paid performer on the show. Oh, yeah, that's what she wants. I bet she doesn't care if it is just a penny more than Jennie, but she wants to be the highest paid actor on the show.

Daily Mirror Blind Item Part Two

Which celebrity Scouse lawyer's foot fetish landed her in trouble when she high-kicked a famous dancer in his nether regions? She's been left facing GBH charges...

What Do You Think?

It seems like everyone is all in a fuss about Frances Cobain's Sweet 16 bash and how it was portrayed as a "suicidal 16" themed bash. I think she was just trying to say that she was kissing off childhood by saying RIP. People are saying it is insensitive to her father's memory. Well first of all, it is her father and only she knows what is right and what is wrong for her, and how she deals with that situation. I don't think any of us can tell her she should deal with that situation and whether she is right or wrong.

Now, what we can criticize is the fact that Courtney Love keeps selling off bits and pieces of Nirvana to anyone who will give her a few bucks and a carton of cigarettes. She always claims she is selling everything off because she has no money. Well, if she has no money, why did she drop $320,000 on the birthday? As far as I know it wasn't being filmed for My Super Sweet 16, and most of those parties don't even rack up that kind of bill. My math is shaky, but for that kind of money she could have bought Frances a $20,000 car for each of the 16 years she has been alive. Now that would be a pretty cool present. I just think that anyone who can drop that kind of money on a party that will be over in a few hours, really is not hurting for cash.

So, what do you think? OK for Frances to throw a RIP to childhood party? Do you think Courtney was ok to spend that kind of dough on a party while at the same time pleading poverty?

Governor Val Kilmer

I know, I know, it sounds like a joke right? Well, apparently it really isn't a joke. Bill Richardson, the current Governor of New Mexico and mandated by term limits to step down in 2011 thinks that Val Kilmer would be the best choice as his replacement. Although they have only talked it about superficially, Richardson said, "I like the idea. Val Kilmer is a New Mexican, he was Batman. You know there have been successful actors going into politics. I don't know how serious he is, but you know if he jumps in a race he's got name ID, so it can't be discounted."

Well, one thing is for sure, Val would make sure that fast food was subsidized for everyone. I think Val is in some kind of unwritten competition with me to see who can get the biggest. Goodness he has ballooned up nicely.

I'm trying to picture Val as a Governor. I know he does some charity work in New Mexico and involved with some animal rescue groups there. He really doesn't have a film career anymore, but at the same time is a big enough star where he would bring some attention to the state. Plus, he could set up some kind of video system outside the Governor's mansion and just play Top Secret and Real Genius on some kind of loop. Oh, and I'm sure Tom Cruise would be happy to come lend a hand and he and Katie will walk door to door telling people to vote for Val and offering a free stress test at the same time.

When Publicists Make Actors Look Stupid

Raise your hands if you know who Heather Mills is. Hey, even if you don't read the tabloids, the chances are good you may have hear her name once or twice or seen her in Kneepads Magazine, or hey, over on ABC on their #1 show Dancing With The Stars. Do you think that maybe if you are also on an ABC show that perhaps you might know who at least some of the contestants are on the show?

In fact, wouldn't you think that probably most people in the entertainment industry would know who Heather Mills is, and that to not know who she is would make you seem kind of ignorant, stupid, or just plain dumb and uninformed. Well, welcome to the world of Eva Longoria. Apparently Eva is wrapped and cocooned in her own idyllic corner of the world and has no idea what is going on outside of the mirror constantly attached to her face.

There had been reports last week that Eva had blocked Heather Mills from appearing on Desperate Housewives. Well, first of all Eva wishes she had that kind of power, and secondly, who really cares what she thinks. Well, her publicist reacted quickly and efficiently and ripped everyone a new for one suggesting Eva would ever do anything like that.

In fact, her publicist went so far as to say, "Eva doesn't even know who Heather Mills is." Not, the never met her, or barely knows her, but straight for the doesn't even know who she is. So, did Liza (Eva's publicist) call up Eva and ask her about Heather, and, then Eva put her thinking cap on real tight and concentrated real hard and didn't even know who Heather was. That is a bunch of crap.

When Publicists Invent Things

So, you are Megan Fox, and no one really cares what you have to say, they just want to look at you. Face it, most guys think she is sexy as hell, although don't understand why she is dating/not dating/engaged/not engaged to Brian Austin Green.

Her GQ was going to be a big seller anyway just for the photos, but she wants people to know she is more than a pretty face, she is also willing to make up stories about loving a stripper, and trying to capture the stripper's heart. Umm, except it is all crap. In the issue of GQ out this month, Megan says that she was in love with a stripper named Nikita who worked at a strip club. She told the magazine that she bought her gifts, tried to get her to quit her line of work, and just wanted to love her and be loved back.

Such a bunch of crap. Allegedly Megan wanted her to quit stripping but would go to the club everyday and Nikita would dance to Aerosmith ballads. Uh huh. All this interview is, is an attempt to get more publicity and to make Megan a bigger sex symbol. Lets face it. If not for Transformers, no one would care about Megan Fox. I put her in the same league as Jessica Alba and for some Jessica Biel, although it remains one of the great unsolved mysteries of our time how anyone except her own parents can find Jessica Biel attractive.

The thing is Megan didn't need to make up the story. Pictures of her in a black bikini, definitely going to be a big seller. The story just makes her look desperate to please. The problem is that now people are going to continually ask her about it, and I have a feeling that she lost touch with Nikita, doesn't know Nikita's first name, can't remember how she ended up in the strip club in the first place, and maybe Nikita is even dead. A tragic death, and unrequited love.

One good thing about the interview. Megan takes a shot at Disney for sexing up their singers when they want them to sell albums while pretending to be a wholesome company. So, score one for Megan.

Josh Didn't Do It

Contrary to reports you may have seen elsewhere, Josh Hartnett did not hook up with Mischa Barton while in London. Yes, Josh did find someone he was attracted to, and yes, she was blonde, but no, it was not Mischa Barton. I'm sure Mischa Barton wishes she had been able to get Josh Hartnett because she could use the publicity.

The Daily Mail reported that Josh and Mischa had left a club in London called Bungalow 8. I won't even asked what happened to the other Bungalows. They also said the couple went to his hotel, where Mischa stayed for about an hour before returning to her own hotel.

Since Josh has been in town, the papers there have had him having sex in a hotel library with a strange woman, sex with Daisy Lowe, and has taken someone new back to his room almost every night.

With all the sex and partying this guy is doing, it is no wonder the start date of the play was pushed back a few weeks to September 19th. Hell, push it back another week and they would probably have him having sex with the Queen. Too much? How about a Duchess? Kate Middleton?

Daily Mirror Blind Item

Which supposedly hard as nails gangsta rapper is actually a pampered and preened diva at heart?

His big minder is with him constantly and runs the star a daily bubble bath and massages his shoulders.

Today's Blind Items

Uh oh. When I heard about this on Saturday, I told the person at the other end of the phone they were full of crap. When I heard about it again this morning from someone else who was at the event, I started to believe. Freaked me the hell out, but I believe. Hey, LA is a coke town. Everyone knows it. It is what it is. So, when a C list actor does a little coke in front of everyone it really is no big deal. Sure, we prefer you to go off in a corner, not for privacy, but because the rest of us don't have any. What you don't normally see is the C list actor sharing it with his underage daughter in front of everyone. I say underage, but coke is always illegal, so the whole underage refers to the fact, well she is underage. Will freak you the hell out. Not that a guy sharing coke with his daughter wouldn't freak you out on a stand alone basis.

Random Photos Part One

So, for the top spot today, I have four people who I think are pretty damn good actors, plus they have never been a blind item which means that for the most part they stay out of trouble. Just thought I would pay some respect.

Tim Daly


Michael Chiklis
Marcia Cross
And Julia Louis-Dreyfus
So, do you think when Ben Affleck comes home from the set like this, he and Jen play surfer boy and girl?
Avril Lavigne has decided that all people want to dress like her. And pay for it.
And yes, of course, still look as crappy as her.

This is Drew Seeley. A word of advice Drew. This was Corey Haim's favorite pose. Just saying.

Dennis Haysbert is definitely one of my favorite actors.
The obnoxiously good looking couple of the day goes to David Charvet and Brooke Burke.
Have not seen Bruce McGill in forever. He looks good.
I think Brian Baumgartner may want to change the shoes before playing.
So, Jennifer Lopez ran the triathlon. What about everyone else who didn't get a cover? Felicity Huffman did it. No one even noticed.

Cindy Crawford didn't run in it, but she was there, and hey it's Cindy Crawford. She stays.

Eliza Dushku ran it, and no even said a word.
Jon Cryer? Hello, How about some love for him.
Heather Tom? No one is even looking at her.
Andy Lauer. Oh, I lost all of you huh? Well the pictures continue below when you get a chance.
Saving some space, I put Jen and Kate together.

Jonas Brothers - Los Angeles
The balls of the day go to Henry Holland who wore this to an event at 10 Downing Street.
Giada, just because Rachael Ray can't be the only female chef we ever get to see here.
Matt Damon gets the charity award of the day. He should just get a special award for going to Haiti.

Miley Cyrus- Los Angeles
The years change, but Kevin Smith's wardrobe never does.
A new S&M game for Kevin Nealon.
James Remar makes his first appearance in the photos.

Patrick Warburton is looking really good.

Even the Princess is smiling today. Wonder if she is going to Vegas or something.
Pamela Anderson has basically run out of men to marry at this point, so goes with this dude.
Yeah, has anyone actually seen it? I know she is London. Hasn't some pap there accidentally tripped her or something just to see what happens?
First rule of triathlon. Save time where you can. Oh, wait, he isn't going to the bathroom. My bad.

Selena Gomez just because, I guess she is relevant. Megan Fox hates her which means I probably should love her.

Yes, Suzanne Engo looks happy now, but she is about to go on an 858 mile run. Good luck with that.
Steve Colbert at the race for the cure event in New York.
Dame Shirley Bassey looks great and is all recovered from her recent illness.
By the time this press tour is over, these guys will..Hell, they won't make it to the end. They will just say f**k it and go home.
Zachary Quinto could use some hips.

Taylor Swift looks amazing.
Gosh, I must be in a good mood, because I think Tyra looks good also.
Scott Wolf still looks short. I think he is on a stool here. I can joke about it because I know about him.
Samantha if you look like that, no girl is ever going to go out with you. Oh, wait, guess I was wrong about that.

Daily Mirror Blind Item

Which skinny TV presenter is failing to hide her increasingly apparent eating disorder?

During a recent work lunch, she went up to the buffet five times - only to disappear to the loos, minutes after each course...

Berta, George, Mom And That Damn Movie

Friday was the day. Unfortunately, because I had to work late, my mom had to wait 24 hours to see George Clooney's ass. We should have waited forever. I guess I should mention that my mom sees all George Clooney films the day they open. She says it is her way of thanking him for making her life with my dad bearable. I choose to ignore what she means by that statement.

All week leading up to the film, people would ask what are you doing this weekend and I would say, "I'm taking my mom to see that new George Clooney, Brad Pitt film." They would invariably ask what it was called and for the life of me, all week I could not remember. I would say, "Read After Burning" or "Burning After Reading" or just tell them I couldn't remember and that it was the new Coen Brothers film.

For the record you should probably burn out your eyes before going to see the film. Or your ears. Actually your best bet is just to be deaf and blind and hope that your sight or hearing doesn't come back before the DVD comes out.

Oh, it all started out well enough. Mom and her flask and just humming that Facts Of Life song with a little grin on her face. Me? Straight to the bar. Surprisingly the Arclight bar was only half filled at 330 in the afternoon on a Saturday. Most people were having red wine, like they were kidding themselves it was the middle of the afternoon. I don't kid around, so just ordered whiskey and didn't give a crap. On the way into the film we saw Berta coming out. Sure, I know now her name is Conchata Ferrell, but you see the maid from Two And A Half Men, let me here you come out with her name. She looked miserable and depressed. Not a good sign. It was like she had wasted two hours of her life she would never get back. And this from a woman who works with Charlie Sheen.

Even in the middle of the afternoon, the place was almost full. Oh, sure everyone was excited when it began. Even some clapping. In fact, the previews were great. Milk and The Soloist look great. When the film started though, out of the first say 100 words of dialogue, the first 15 were f bombs. After about the 5th, it was old. The total for the film was somewhere in the 100 range. John Malkovich played the same damn character he always plays, just at a louder volume. Tilda Swinton was awful. She plays John's wife and is supposed to be having an affair with George Clooney. Well, there is no chemistry and her character actually seemed like she would never have sex, so I didn't understand it. George Clooney, was ok. Played a dumb ass, but he alternated between tough guy and moron, and it didn't work. Brad Pitt? He was funny as hell, BUT ONLY because it was Brad Pitt playing him and so you were laughing at that fact rather than the character. The character was stupid. Frances McDormand? Meh. She was ok. Probably the best of the bunch.

The only saving grace of the film were two bit parts that were in the film on two separate occasions. I told someone to rent the DVD, and then changed my mind and said, no because they would just turn it off. Unfortunately I couldn't get up and leave. The movies and George Clooney is like church to my mom. You don't get up until the end. But even mom, the woman who actually liked that Chuck Barris film he did, didn't like him in this. Plus there was no naked ass. Oh you should have seen mom squirming when George was taking a shower at one point, but no luck for her, and I'm sure none for dad that night.

Oh, I'm sure some of you saw it this weekend and will say, it was a combination of elements and there was weave or some kind of garbage like that. It sucked. Even the Coen Brothers are not perfect, and it sucked. All the clapping at the beginning of the film? Not so much at the end. None. Just some mumbling about what the hell they just watched and a lot of confused faces.

Well She Did It

I figure that if I am going to give Jennifer Lopez a big bunch of crap about her foot injury, that I owe it to her to say congratulations if she muddled through her severe foot injury and managed to complete the Malibu Triathlon. There are not many competitors who could have shaken off an injury like that. Sure, she had to cancel the Project Runway finale, but hey, no one wanted to see her on that anyway, and she used that time to get in the training room and had a team of doctors working on her constantly just to get that foot in shape. Knowing she couldn't let her charities down or the money she was going to get for the cover shoots, Jennifer showed the gritty determination and fire that has made her a mediocre singer and actress and completed the triathlon in about two and a half hours. You know what? She was only 40 minutes behind Matt "I run and swim everyday of my life" McConaughey so that sounds pretty good. I mean he trains everyday. He's a man's man right? So, Jennifer, considering how the rest of your career has gone, you may want to consider a career in these. At the very least, the more you get outside, the more your husband might start looking less like a skeleton and more like a human that is actually still breathing.

Congratulations. Now, if you hadn't been an idiot and made your husband's birthday party in New York, thus having to charter a plane, you might have actually made a buck or two from all these cover articles.

Did She Still Get A Present?

To all the guys who are reading this. Let me give you a piece of advice when it comes to engagements. Having been through about 13, with six going the distance, I know of which I speak. Now, I'm not counting the engagements where you meet some woman in a bar and around closing time she says she is saving it for her wedding night and you ask her to marry you. That doesn't count and in no way matters to what I am about to say.

Jennifer Hudson got engaged on her birthday Friday and I am incredibly happy for her. On the other hand, after the glow of Friday's engagement wore off, I'm sure she woke up Saturday morning and asked herself, "did he not buy me a present?"

See, a guy will often think he is making a good decision by proposing on a woman's birthday. Nope, not a good idea. You think she is going to be happy with just the ring. Ummm, no. See, that isn't how it works. See, if you are going to marry her, she would have got the engagement ring anyway. If you had picked last week to give it to her, she would have got a birthday gift this week. You wouldn't have said, "hey, I just spent $10,000 on you for that ring last week, so I thought I was good."

See, I bet he didn't get her anything, and she probably didn't realize it until she woke up the next day. But, I guarantee you that she started reminding him right that second. A nice poke to the ribs and asking where he put it so she could open it, and him saying "f**k, you have got to be kidding. I just spent $10,000 on her last night."

In addition, you have now forever combined her birthday with engagement. Not really a good thing. I know guys we would love if weddings, birthdays and all days we needed to remember were on just one easy day to remember. We could then get it tattooed, and just refer to it to make sure on when we need to get things done. However, for some reason, just as you would hate it if your birthday were December 24 or 25th, most women do not find it fun to have their wedding, birthday and Valentines Day/Mother's Day to be the same day. They want multiple days.

So, David Otunga, as you move forward in your engagement with Jennifer, I do hope you keep these things in mind as you schedule that wedding day.

How Soon Is Too Soon?

So, if you go out with someone for six months and basically spend the night with them every single night and then break up, how long should you wait before you go back to the ex and have sex with him? Well, apparently if you are Daisy Lowe, the answer is about 8 hours. Eight hours after breaking up with Mark Ronson, Daisy Lowe was seen going into the apartment of her ex boyfriend Will Cameron and didn't come out again until the next morning. Did they have sex? Who the hell knows? But, how does it look? It looks bad. It looks like Mark got his ass kicked by Daisy and that she was using Mark as a rebound.

I actually really liked Mark and Daisy as a couple. I think they looked good together, and for some reason I thought the age thing was ok with them. If two people are on the same page, it really doesn't matter the age difference. Neither was gold digging, and they looked good.

I think the only time you would go straight back to your ex that way is if you had never got over them in the first place, and them you, or you have been cheating with your ex the entire time of the new relationship. Think about it. You break up, you move on. If you are in a new relationship, you tend to focus solely on that person and neglect everyone else around you. Your ex is going to be way down that list. So, there is something more going on here than the age thing the Daily Mail reported. I don't think it was about age. I think it was about Daisy still wanting to be with Will. I do think she should have at least waited a full day. I mean that is just totally disrespectful, and is sure to get her a scolding on Samantha Ronson's blog. But then of course Gavin Rossdale will go over to Samantha's house and kick her ass. Then Lindsay will try and sleep with Gavin and Gavin will try and sleep with Mark and it will just be one big mess.

The fact Daisy wears outfits like the one above in public, should in no way be held against her. Well, ok, maybe you should. I mean it is September. Who really wears red like that in September. Oooh, you though I meant the fact that even though she is standing you can see her vayjayjay. I think that is a pretty regular thing now isn't it? I'm not sure that is even a crime anymore. A guy sure, they would throw him in jail. Women, not so much. Something wrong with that isn't there?

Good Timing Alicia Keys

Just three days after Alicia Keys becomes eligible for bashing again on the blog, she goes and does something bash worthy. I love that timing. It was almost like she waited until the ban was lifted, just so I could take the time to call her a homewrecker. There's nothing I like talking more about than a homewrecker. I especially love it when they wreck a home while the man is married and his wife is pregnant. You don't often find class like that short of the Sienna Miller level. This is no minor league stuff for Alicia Keys, this is world class homewrecking.

According to the NY Daily News, Alicia is the reason SwissBeatz is divorcing his wife of five years Mashonda and abandoning his one year old son. Swiss denies it, but come on, how seriously are you going to take a guy who can't spell Beats correctly. I mean last week Alicia threw him a birthday party and Jennifer Lopez and Marc Anthony showed up. You don't call in those kinds of favors unless he is living with you at a minimum, or he just signed a record deal and you get 10%. When she introduced him, Alicia called him her boo. Immediately Swiss, German, French and all the rest of his pals cringed. His lawyer had a heart attack and Alicia just ignored it all and kept talking.

Now, sure, I have been focused on Alicia being the home wrecker, but it does take two to wreck. The thing is, Alicia is more well known. Is Swiss an a-hole? Absolutely. Should his wife take him for everything she can? You bet. Maybe she will even bankrupt him and then we can see how much Alicia loves him when he is sitting on her couch all day doing nothing, except costing her money while she is out working. Hey, kind of sounds like Mariah and Nick huh?

Swiss has been playing the its over game to Alicia while still continuing to stay over at Mashonda's house every now and again telling her they should work it out. See? That's disgusting. Bad enough you are a cheater, but to go ahead and play that game shows what a complete a-hole he is. And if you had any respect left for Alicia it should be gone. Mashonda apparently told Alicia to back off, but Alicia just kept on fallin', in and out of love. You kind of have to hum that last little part.

Tina Does Sarah, But Not Like It Sounds

NY Daily News Blind Item

Which socialite fashionista had to have her boyfriend's assistant bring her a change of clothes at the Bryant Park tents this week after soiling her skivvies?