Full Frontal Friday

Yep, you know you want it. It is that time of the week again. The time when you are thinking about going home or maybe you are just thinking about FFF. Anyway, inside is Rick Springfield and ummm, you'll like it. All I'm saying.

Four For Friday

#1 - This married A list country singer has a very jealous wife. She has toned it down lately might it come raging back when she discovers why her husband saw a doctor twice while he was on the road recently.

#2 - Which A list action star is paying big bucks to an unknown female actress to be his girlfriend for the next two months while he is doing press for his new film. He wants a girlfriend to talk about and not the increasing questions about his sexuality.

#3 & #4 - Two singers. One male, and one female. Yes, they are a couple but not in the same group. He has been a solid performer for a few years. Her? Not so long, but a much bigger name. Well as much as the two profess their love for each other you may think it must be just a perfect relationship. It was until she started sleeping with her agent whenever she can ditch the boyfriend.

Random Photos Part One

Paul McCartney doing Karaoke to "Kung Fu Dancing" is always going to get the top spot. Always. Actually anyone who does gets the top spot. Come on. Sing it with me. You know the words.

Every so often I go ahead and put a child star in the photos. It does help though if I like a film you have been in and Abagail Breslin has been in some that I really like.

Every so often Angelica Huston shows up somewhere and when she does then I almost feel obligated to put her in. I mean she is Angelica Huston after all.

Nice stache Brad.

Madonna & Britney Spears - Los Angeles

And once again, we have Daniel Craig. How many more times can this film premiere? I don't even think they have done Asia yet.

Elvis Costello - New York

The newly single Evan Rachel Wood.

Is it my imagination or does it seem like Gavin Rossdale has gone out almost every night for the past few weeks.

Halle Berry on the set of her new film.

Hugh Laurie has been absent from the photos for awhile.

It must be Fast Times week. First was Phoebe Cates and now Jennifer Jason Leigh.

The only photo of Jason Lewis I could find from him last night.

Jenny Lewis - New York

I know this may sound odd, but I'm getting almost a Kevin Smith vibe here from Jason Priestly.

No such vibe from Jason Statham though.

Kanye West - Liverpool

I think I have professed my love for Lisa Loeb here before. I don't think there is a celebrity I have known longer so, she is my first. Not in that way. Get your minds out of the gutter. FFF comes later.

So, I found this photo of Lindsay Lohan. Notice the lit cigarette and the guy who was obviously passed the drink because of the way he is holding it.

Now, look at the same photo from People Magazine. Must not offend someone I guess is their policy.

Speaking of offend. You know what? It takes guts to wear that dress even if all you want is attention, so Mischa Barton doesn't get the snark today.

You know the rules. You wear velvet and you are in no matter what.

When you wear velvet shoes, it is just a bonus.

On the other hand if you are wearing these shoes, you don't get your face in.

When Marisa Tomei hasn't hit the bar yet she still can look really good.

I will let all of you handle this. My first reaction was the Splash was having open auditions and Nicole was auditioning for the mermaid.

It must be Christmas, the gorilla got his presents.

You know it is a great day when Sandra Bernhard is actually smiling.

The original Hot Lips, Sally Kellerman.

And Sarah Michelle Gellar who has been hot I guess.

Taio Cruz - London

The Killers - Liverpool

I would be smiling to if I just made $10M this week. Hell, you give me $100 and I will smile from ear to ear for a few hours.

It has been a couple of months I think since we last checked in on Tilda Swinton.

Your Turn

Yesterday when I posted the photos of Andrew McCarthy and Anthony Michael Hall it got me to thinking about all the brat pack films. Not that I went home and watched one. Instead I went home and watched Inconvenient Truth for the first time. I know, but I'm slow. Anyway though, I did think about brat pack films yesterday and realized that although I have seen them all, there are some I enjoy watching again more than others. So, today, your favorite brat pack film is the subject of Your Turn. I think I'm going with Pretty In Pink just because it was a little edgier than the rest. You can also stretch it somewhat if you want. Less Than Zero is not really a "brat pack" film, but it does have Andrew McCarthy in it so that would fit.

Naomi Campbell Is Better Than Us

So, imagine you have just taken a six hour flight from London to New York. Maybe you are alone or maybe you are with your spouse and two kids who just want to go outside. Before you can get free though you have go to through immigration. Now, further imagine there are about 200 people ahead of you in line. Looks like you might be there awhile. But, not if you are Naomi Campbell. The airport queen herself was escorted past every single passenger including her fellow first class passengers and whisked through the immigration line. Apparently the US is unconcerned about her little run in with two police officers in London Heathrow. Of course if that had been us and we tried to enter the US, we would have spent about two hours being questioned before being let in.

Now, the good news in all of this is that the crowd, in the valiant tradition of all New Yorkers booed the hell out of Naomi as she sped past them and flower petals laid at her feet before each new step she took. Naomi's spokesperson said that Naomi didn't ask for special treatment. Uh huh. She may not have asked but I fear for the lives of the people in the line if she had to wait. Can you imagine if she actually had to wait in line like an "everyday person." Think she would have done some damage? Maybe it is a good thing they escorted her through. I wish her spokesperson would have used that as an excuse. That would have been classic.

Have You Seen Your Daughter?

I don't think there are very many people that are Blake Fielder Civil fans in the world, but I will say that he at least served his time and is in rehab. He is making at least the pretense of attempting to get clean. Don't know if it will work, but you could say that about anyone who is an addict. Amy Winehouse on the other hand is just someone who has money and can afford drugs and medical care or else, lets face it, she would probably be dead.

So, when her dad said this yesterday I just had to wonder if he was living in the same world the rest of us are. "Blake is a no-hoper. I want Amy to forget about him."

Umm, he makes it sound as if his daughter is at the top of the ladder and is a clean living superstar. At this point in time I would say that Blake has a better chance of recovery than Amy. This has been going on for so long. I don't understand first of all how she manages to keep buying drugs and not getting caught. I understand she is not outside buying them herself but if you were the police don't you think you might follow some of the visitors who are coming to her house and keeping her supplied? It is not like she is hiding in the bathroom doing some coke at a party she got from a friend. This is someone who by all accounts spends her entire waking day doing drugs. At some point the body just can't take that. I think her dad should be less focused on Blake and more focused on doing something for his daughter. Just take her, throw her into rehab someplace and don't let her leave. If Jamie Spears can get a conservatorship over Britney then I'm sure Amy's dad can do something similar. I know you are supposed to want to get help on your own, but at this point can she doing anything on her own other than use and die in front of us a little everyday.

Where's Jerry?

When I answer the door to some loud knocking that isn't actually emanating from my head, it invariably turns out to be some group of people with a Watchtower or any kid from a ten mile radius who knows I'm good for $50 of whatever edible thing they are selling. Of course, with that there is no immediate gratification, but in a way it is kind of like Christmas everyday because someone is always dropping off something I ordered. "Oh, the green tea chocolate came today. Nice."

I know for a fact that Julia Louis Dreyfus ever came to my door. I know that because she would still be here with me. But, apparently Julia did a lot of door to door campaigning and people recognized her. See, now that would be fun, but I would keep asking her where Jerry was and I would just be asking a million questions about Seinfeld. She could tell me she was supporting Tony The Tiger for President and I would just go along with it to keep her there.

If you want to hear her talk about her experiences meeting people like me while she was campaigning, the video of her Leno appearance is below.

He Needs A Publicist?

I understand that if you feel that you are somewhat important that you may need a publicist. Maybe you just want one because then you can feel like you are sitting at the cool lunch table. Whatever it is, I do recognize there are some people that need publicists. However, when Linda Hogan's 19 year old needs a publicist then you know that all of us should have one to. I think that if you require the services of a publicist, hopefully you should at least be able to pay for that person yourself. Guess that is not how things work for Linda though.

This is what Linda's new publicist had to say about Linda's boy toy having a new publicist. "Charlie is now in the public eye and he needs a rep just like every other public person, nothing wrong with that."

In the public eye? I will remember she said that when people start talking smack about him and he sues someone saying he isn't in the public eye. How long will he be in the public eye? If she dumps him tomorrow will anyone remember his name? Hell, I don't remember his name or even what he looks like. All I know is that since Hulk took one of Brooke's friends that Linda decided she would give a little payback and find some young thing of her own. Nothing wrong with that. Do what you have to do. I'm not sure Linda even needs a publicist, so what on earth made her think he does to? Could she not afford to buy him another car or something so she said here's a publicist instead. Is that what every celebrity is getting their significant others for the holidays?

Spitzer Won't Do Federal Time

After spending probably several million dollars and countless hands on interviews with hookers around the world, federal investigators have decided not to charge Eiliot Spitzer with any federal crimes. Despite conducting thousands of "interviews" with prostitutes the agents thought were cute, they could find no evidence that Spitzer used any money for hookers he shouldn't be using in the first place.

Well I guess it is good to know that Eliot only used the family money to sleep with hookers and didn't make the people of NY or the people who contributed to his campaign also contribute to Ashley Dupre's retirement fund.

The article that I read didn't say how much the federal government spent on this probe, but who wants to bet is was in the millions? And Spitzer spent how much on them? Yeah, and then there would have been a few million more spent at trial because they would have had to check out the hookers again and this would have gone on and on and at the end of it all Spitzer would have plead to some crime and probably done six months in jail.

I'm all for convicting some guy if he did something wrong and I'm sure his wife would have loved to see him go to jail, but I don't think it should take millions of dollars spent to hopefully get a guy locked up for six months at further tax payer expense. Believe me, he doesn't need jail time, I'm sure the wife is making his life rightfully miserable. He would probably welcome the sweet embrace of the federal prison system right now.

But Does Billy Bob Call?

Brad Pitt taped Oprah yesterday and apparently it was a good one. Oh, and as a bonus Cate Blanchett was on the show as well. There is a great recap of the taping which will air in a couple weeks but here are some highlights. Apparently Oprah thinks she is a woman of the people. She said that she would have invited Brad to be with her on election night on Chicago, but didn't invite him because she was going to be with "everyday people." The fact that she got there by limo didn't seem to phase her. How did Brad get there? Took the El and "was shoulder to shoulder the whole way." Umm, Oprah. When was the last time you took the train?

That was the first part of the interview and from there just took a nice leisurely stroll down a spiral that still hasn't stopped. Brad seemed sensitive to tattoo questions but made it clear he has at least one for Angelina. No one asked about the Billy Bob tattoo Angelina had removed or the one she still has in a very private area that stares Brad in the face sometimes if you know what I mean.

Brad said he can only handle being with four of the kids at once but that isn't going to stop them from having more. I wonder how that rotation things work. All the kids shuttle in and out like you were playing volleyball and rotating after every point. "OK Pax, you're up. Shiloh. You hit the showers."

Even though Brad did not appear to have a very good time, Oprah still held onto him like Bella onto Edward running through the forest as they left the stage. You like that? Yeah, I keep up.

Apparently Cate isn't a big enough star to get solo time with Oprah so she had to share her five minutes.

Ted C Blind Item

As we have made abundantly clear, there are a ton of closeted gay actors and performers in this business. Some are more flagrant (Toothy Tile) than others (Crotch Uh-Lastic).

And whether or not these sexually deceiving dudes choose to be public about their shenanigans, usually their reps—managers, publicists, agents, gardeners, etc.—find out via some email or some shocked coworker that their client goes homo. Not so with Oded Good-Head...

His manager discovered the boy likes to do it with other boys by walking in on Oded in his dressing room! Was most awkward, too, as the man who was being serviced by Mr. Good-Head—who has quite the reputation with the girlies, not to mention multitalents in front of concert audiences and movie cameras alike—saw the manager first.

Very whuh-whoh kinda sitch, ya know?

Poor Od-y didn't notice his 10 percent guy was standing right there until his latest surreptitious conquest pulled him up and away from what the awfully good-looking performer was so earnestly doing.

End result? Fellatio interruptus—and new pics of Oded and assorted chickies coming out soon in Us Weekly and other razor-sharp standards of Hollywood journalism.

Today's Blind Items

Yes, I know some of you dislike the soap opera ones, but there are lots that do love them. Today lets go over to NBC. Which married male cast member who has been on the show for a very long time is sleeping with the daughter of the one of the producers? Not a really scandalous thing until you realize she is still in her teens and our cast member is certainly past middle age. At least she is in college now. It was much tougher to get together when she was in high school. I will say that it has always been legal though apparently. Did not start until she was 18.

Random Photos Part One

Fats Domino gets the top spot. How can you not give it to him.

The Who & Michael J Fox - New York

I just like to check in on Amy Adams every so often. Plus, tonight is Office night so there is a kind of reason to the posting. No, she isn't going to be on it. Is she?

Al Green - London

OK. Andrew McCarthy is the Heidi Klum of actors. He is on set, goofing off and still does not take a bad photo. Damn, he is a good looking guy.

And sticking with the brat pack theme, Anthony Michael Hall shows that if you work and work at it hard enough you can make it back from probably the worst SNL hiring ever.

Apparently Amy Winehouse thought Halloween was yesterday.

Please don't let the glove thing come back. Please, oh please, oh please.

Brad Paisley is the most casual looking person I have seen going into Letterman in a long time.

Craig David looks great.

I'm starting to feel like a Daniel Craig fansite. Are you tired of him yet?

Not that I enjoy two days in a row of Gwyneth Paltrow, but I think everyone should have a chance at fashion redemption. Why I myself have been given that chance. I was under the false impression that rust colored shoes go fine with every color. I know, I know, but I have been saved.

Always nice to see Julianne Moore.

Just because it has been some time since Oliver Hudson was in the photos.

Yes that is Kevin Kline the actor on the left, but to all men throughout the world he will be known as the man who stole Phoebe Cates from the rest of us.

Katy Perry has officially jumped the shark. Or in this case a huge stick of chapstick. I'm not sure what this theme is. Some kind of pseudo sexual football player humping a big tube of something you put on your lips. Freud would love it though.

This bike looks way too small for Keanu Reeves.

I think that Luke Goss should be forced to stare at me for an hour just so he knows how most of us look.

I'm always putting Miss somebody or other up, so why not Miss Australia.

"Nick baby. I'm signing autographs. I'm sure the bellmen could use some help with the bags."

A nice random photo. Marcia Gay Harden and Ed Harris.

The impossibly great looking couple of the day goes to UK football player Michael Owen and his wife.

And no slouch herself is Miss Martha.

Petra - Melbourne

Pink in a dress is always worth a post. She looks nice.

Prince William looks nice when he gets all dressed up. By the way, see that flower on his lapel. They were doing that in Canada as well for Remembrance Day on November 11th. I don't know why we don't do that in the US for Veterans Day.

"Yes, it's true, I get to sleep with Scarlett Johannson every night."

Lot of passion in that kiss. Probably the first time since the wedding they have kissed.

Speaking of Scarlett J.

And the ex of Mariah Carey and his wife Thalia.

A Three Day Trip

I don't know about most of you, but when I go away for the weekend, I generally take one bag of clothes with me and one bag of food. It is mostly food from the four basic food groups. Chocolate, fruit pies, sugar, and potato chips. I do this of course to save on overpriced mini-bar items. That $10 Snickers bar doesn't sound like such a bad deal when you are half in the bag at 3am. For my Canadian friends who may not have Snickers, you may substitute Wunderbar for Snickers which as I discovered are pretty damn tasty and worth sacrificing a few clothes for in order to find more room.

Anyway, how many times can a person change clothes in three days? Even the most finicky person I have ever seen would probably just need one bag a day and that is the extreme. The photos above are the approximately 20 bags that Mariah Carey brought with her to London for her three day stay. 20 bags for her and Nick brought his Spongebob backpack for him. Now, that works out to six bags a day but also does not take into account the fact that I'm sure she will actually go shopping while she is in London and add to this collection. The thing we also need to remember is storing all of these bags. I don't care how big of a suite you have, you know that 20 bags are not going to fit into the closet space they gave her. I'm sure right now there is one of her assistants who is going to have to sleep on a chair in the corner of a room because they have everything from these bags hanging all over their room as Nick stands in front of the television ironing it all.

Zac Won't Be Getting Naked

For all of those High School Musical fans who wanted some equal time after being forced to see Vanessa Hudgens naked, they will have to keep waiting. Despite all the rumors and reports, Zac Efron told the French website TeeMix that he won't be doing the Broadway play Equus because he doesn't have the balls. Actually his term was that he wasn't ballsy enough.

I don't know if that is because he is afraid to show off what he has or just that he doesn't want to get naked every night in front of a live audience with cell phone cameras. Even if I had a great body, I think there is something truly terrifying about the prospect of getting up in front of 1,000 people a night and basically being there naked for 30 minutes. It is quite something else to do it on a film and be done with it and not have to do it every night.

So, I don't have any problems with Zac chickening out. I know the folks at Disney must be breathing a sigh of relief that their feel good franchise kid doesn't want to be strutting his stuff on stage for awhile.

"But I don't know if I would do something edgy for the sake of doing something edgy, I think as I mature, so will my roles. I think it will come with time. I'm not going to do anything drastic."

What that means of course is that when the whole High School Musical - The College Years gets done with and he has no career, then and only then will he be willing to strip for money and for the shock value. So, all of you 15 year old kids will just have to make do with a naked Harry Potter for now.

Would You Marry Danny Bonaduce?

There are reality shows and then there are reality shows. That seems redundant until you think that Amazing Race which is my favorite is at one end of the spectrum and The Next Mrs. Danny Bonaduce is so far at the other end of the rainbow that there is actually a f**king leprechaun sitting there.

I guess if Flavor Flav and Bret Michaels can find love then so can Danny Bonaduce. Apparently Danny is desperately trying to sell the show because he was just ordered to pay his wife about $200K a year in spousal and child support. For Danny, that means less porn unless he can find a way to make some money.

So, that of course translates into some lucky lady getting the chance to spend eternity with Danny Bonaduce. That sounds appealing doesn't it? Well, I will tell you that if the show does get bought, there will be thousands of women who will do just that. Sure, it might involve actually having to touch him or go on a date with him, but hey, they will get to have their 15 minutes of fame. And you just know deep in your heart there will be someone there who will fall in love with Danny and make him sing Come On Get Happy while they are having sex in the final episode. Of course if the photos in FFF are anything to go by, she will have a tough time getting happy if you know what I mean.

Oh, speaking of having sex in the final episode, I finally watched some of that Bret Michaels show. I saw the last episode and the reunion show. For those of you who didn't watch it, let me quickly summarize. The final two people were a stripper and a tv reporter. Bret, before he could make a decision had to spend one night having sex with the reporter and then the next night the stripper and neither of the two women even saw anything wrong with that.

I realize I am a guy and that I should be ok with it, but I really thought it was wrong on so many levels and was shocked that neither woman even cared.

Holy Crack Pipe Batman. Richard Grieco Has A Job

Richard Grieco who was last seen working about two years ago in a three episode arc of Veronica Mars has got himself a steady paycheck, at least for a few weeks. Wow. You remember Richard don't you? This is the guy who was the biggest star on 21 Jump Street. Johnny Depp who?

Since that quick rise to fame though, he has been on one long downward spiral with the lone exception being his Oscar worthy performance in Night At The Roxbury. You are probably wondering who the hell gave him a job? Well, it is that place in the sky where people who were not famous enough for The Surreal Life go, it is Gone Country. Yes, that show that brought us Bobby Brown singing country is back for another season and this time they have truly outdone themselves in finding people no one remembers.

Miss USA 2006 Tara Conner, former Monkees drummer Micky Dolenz, funk master George Clinton, '80s pop star Taylor Dayne, Prince protégé and drummer Sheila E and former American Idol runner-up Justin Guarini.

OK, so we have heard of most of them. Actually I like all of them a lot except for Justin Guarini. At least they all can sing can't they? Can Richard sing? Wow, I want to watch Richard and George Clinton sing a duet.

My early guess is that Taylor Dayne wins because she actually has talent. George has bunches of talent but I don't know if he can sing country.

Damn, I think I will actually watch this one.

Is This True?

This can't be true can it? Miley Cyrus was on Tyra and said that when she was 11 she had a job cleaning homes. Where the hell was she living? Central America? "I had one normal job and I actually liked it. I worked at this place called Sparkles Cleaning Service and I cleaned houses, I was like 11. I can clean toilet bowls."

So, what? Her parents were already sending her out in the world to make them a few extra bucks? Daddy needed a longer mullet and couldn't afford the extensions so he sent out his kid to clean houses? WTF? Or, are you telling me that this cleaning agency is hiring 11 year old kids? You can't get a work permit to clean houses when you are 11. This has to be some kind of joke. I didn't see Tyra and so don't know if she said this in jest or what. It is tough to tell sometimes with just words.

I wouldn't put it past Billy Ray to make her work when she was 11 for the abovementioned reasons but would you send your 11 year old kid out to the homes of strangers to clean their homes? Was she part of a crew? Was the owner of the company a friend of the family? I think it is all crap but if someone saw the show, let me know.

Where Is The Lawsuit?

If some publication accused you of going out to a strip club and getting lap dances from women all night and that your marriage to the mother of your future twins was in trouble, and it was all a lie, do you think you might want to sue? I mean when you get home and your wife reads all of that stuff and you don't sue, she is just going to assume it is all true, especially considering your reputation.

So, when Star Magazine said in their issue this week that Charlie Sheen and his former co-star Michael Boatman (love him) went to a Vegas strip club and partied with a bunch of strippers and had numerous lap dances, you would think that the response would be more virulent from the Sheen camp.

Instead we get, "Star magazine never lets the facts get in the way of good hatchet job. Had the reporter bothered to check, he or she would have learned that the reason Charlie was in Vegas was for a contractual appearance on behalf of Planet Hollywood's Prive. Charlie was in Vegas only four hours. He arrived and left the same evening, not on October 28, as Star reports. Star's reporting of his alleged behavior is as inaccurate as the rest of their story."

Uh huh. The same article talked about how he and Brooke are having problems. My guess is that he is spending far to much time in front of the computer looking at porn and not enough time with Brooke. I don't know what she really expected. This is Mr. Porn And Hookers we are talking about here. I think the only thing that would slow him down would be bankruptcy or some social disease. Oh, or maybe Denise Richards in her car while Charlie is walking down a deserted alley at night.

If someone said these things about me and they were not true, someone would be getting sued and not just a half-ass statement from my publicist.

The Earth Will Still Keep Spinning

I'm sure somewhere right now the old Justin Timberlake and Britney Spears message boards are turning over their engines and starting to get some life back in them. All those message boards devoted to the couple remaining a couple have obviously been dormant for a few years now, except of course for those 50 year old guys trying to hook up with Britney and Justin look-a-likes.

You would have thought the earth was coming to an end with the reaction around LA that Madonna is bringing Britney and Justin back together tonight during her show at Dodger Stadium here. Ryan Seacrest went so far as to say it is the most amazing thing he has ever seen before. Wow. I think it is a big deal for the five minutes they spend together on stage, but is it a life changing event? I don't think so. Do I think it is going to lead to some kind of Britney/Justin reunion? I don't think so.

All this is going to be is a one off reunion thing. Think about when Christina and Britney performed together with Madonna. Did that lead to Britney and Christina being BFF? No. It was a one time thing and I don't think this will be even that good.

This is Madonna though at her very finest. I am constantly amazed at her promotion skills. This is a woman who has reinvented herself continually and kept herself in the spotlight through sheer will for almost 30 years. So, enjoy the five minutes but for all you Britney/Justin fans who think this is going to be a wedding harbinger, you need to breathe.

Daily Mirror Blind Item

Which freaky singer is so worried her bloke will cheat on her that she's told her family to tail him...

Today's Blind Items

Today is more of an update to a blind item. Within the past month or so I think I posted about a celebrity chef who was cheating on his wife. The celebrity chef is known to all of you. Would he be A list? Sure. Definitely. Anyway, the update is that I was unsure who he was cheating with. Turns out it is one of his restaurant employees. Not someone who works with him on television or with his books, but a restaurant employee. This could of course be the reason why he is spending so much time at that particular restaurant lately.

Random Photos Part One

So, the top spot today is not a photo, but it is definitely random and good. This is a video of an 81 year old man who made his own YouTube video in response to a Gordon Ramsay YouTube video. This guy was watched by three times as many viewers and is a cook you will not soon forget.



Brad Garrett and what appears to be his granddaughter. Oh, wait it is his girlfriend. This photo happens to be taken at a hotel but I'm sure they just went back to his place. Or maybe not because her curfew is 11p on a school night.
Christina Applegate on the set of her television show.

The random couple of the day comes from New Zealand. That is a first I think. This was at the premiere of some film and it is Celina Jaitley and Ben Mitchell.

Been some time since I had Chris Tucker in here. See that smile? It is the smile of a man who knows he doesn't ever have to work another day in his life and if he does will get paid a lot of money to do so.

Our daily Daniel Craig photo takes us to Rome this time I think. I have a cardigan pretty similar to his. When I say similar though, I just mean the fact they are both cardigans and both black. Mine I think is about three regular sweaters sewn together to make one big mumu type sweater.

Def Leppard - Sydney

Elliot Minor - Manchester

So, I posted Madonna on Friday in the photos so for equal time here is Guy Ritchie who has not stopped smiling in about a month.

Jessica Alba and Chris Messina on the set of their new film. I'm guessing since they are dressing down Jessica for the role they must be relying on her acting talents for the success of the film. Good luck with that.

Kenny G, just because I think he is the only man left in the world with that hairstyle.

This is Kerry Katona getting her nails done. Honestly with the length of those things, she is going to have to have someone dress her. Can you do anything with nails that long? I doubt she will be taking a typing class anytime soon, but texting someone would seem problematic.

The worst dress of the day candidate #1 from Katy Perry.

Or this little see through number worn by Gwyneth Paltrow. Yes, those are her white panties showing through for the world to see.

Maroon 5 - Mexico City

My ignorant question of the day. Has anyone ever seen a stroller like this before? Oh, and Minnie Driver and her baby. But seriously, the stroller.

You don't recognize her do you? I didn't. It's Natalie Imbruglia.

"I don't want to say that I was solely responsible for Barack winning, but I am Oprah after all."

Paris Hilton cast a vote for Benji Madden because he would be hot as President.

I'm on the fence about seeing Role Models but I will say their billboards are great.

How often do we get Suri smiling? Have to include it. And look red nail polish. From mom or dad?

Travis Barker and Shanna Moakler at the happiest place on earth. They look thrilled don't they. OK, at least the kids do.

Apparently Tony and Eva haven't quite figured out that thing that hangs on your wall with the 30 boxes that marks the days and weeks.

I'm Rich!!!

I'm rich. I just wanted all of you to be the first to know and to thank you for it. Here is the e-mail showing me just how rich I am and of course my response.


Dear Friend,

I am glad to inform you that I have successfully concluded the transaction,the money has been transferred to Australia through the assistant of Mr.Howard Ferraro who is an Australian based businessman.Currently I am in Australia now.However,I did not forget you because you are the source of my success,you made me what I am now though you are not there to complete this project with me but I gave all the credit and thanks to you.I know it is not your fault or rather your wish to back off on me and the transaction,I understand it was simply because of some circumstances you could not control. In appreciate of your assistance I have mapped out as a compensation and wrote on your favor a certified bank draft worth of 2.7 Million Euro(Two Million Seven Hundred Thousand Euro Only) I left the draft with my managaer Mr Gerado Fischer on my departure to Australia.I would like you to contact him on the below info and instruct him where to send the draft to because i have directed him.

Attn:Mr Gerado Fischer
Email Address to contact:geradofischer@aim.com

As soon as you recieve the draft you let me know because i am busy here trying to put things together and may not be chanced to email you frequently.Feel free to contact him for your bank draft.I will stop here.Once again,thank you very much and remain blessed.

Regards,
Mr Damle Ahsok.

Dear Damle,

Thank you so much for the money. You have no idea how much it is going to come in handy. I'm trying to move from parent's place, but the nickles and dimes that fall into the couch are not adding up to the deposit as quickly as I would have liked. So, when you did this for me, I jumped up and nearly split my pants. That wouldn't have been pretty. I hate doing laundry so, sometimes I go commando. I keep hoping that if I go to the laundromat I will run into Pamela Anderson? Do you know her? Baywatch. Yeah, she is the blond. Wait, they all are. Well, just look her up on the internet.

I want to thank you for making out the check in my name. My name isn't friend though and so a check like that might be tough to cash. Plus, I'm not really into checks right now. I could say it was because of the credit crisis, but honestly, it is just that my bank and I don't get along. Apparently when you have a negative balance they expect you to make it current, and long story short, they kind of closed it. I would take it to one of those check cashing places, but I don't think they have enough money to cover it. Plus, have you ever been in one of those places? The lines are outrageous. Do you have check cashing places in Romania? You must right? I mean lots of people need pay day advances in the world not just here.

Thanks for giving me all the credit for your success, but that seems a little unwarranted. I mean what did I really do? I opened your e-mail. Sure, I was sending out good vibes and kept following The Secret wishing for money. Did you get the vibes? I guess that book works huh? Have you read it? It is pretty tough to follow, but I guess we are both quick learners. Well, I am quick for most things but one of my friends takes this stats class, and I have to say that when she starts talking about it my mind goes into this deep glassy eyed haze. It is kind of like being drunk, but without the buzz. Do you get drunk? I don't really get drunk, I just like to stay at a constant mellow state. I find sipping vodka out of a coffee cup at work does the trick pretty well. Plus, it makes the days go by quicker if you know what I mean. I guess you do since you are some big shot business type guy.

So, I will send an e-mail to Gerardo. Hey, he isn't by any chance the same Gerardo is he? I always wondered what happened to Gerardo? Who knew that Rico Suave would be his only hit. It is kind of my theme song so it will be cool to actually talk to him. There is hardly a day that goes by when I don't tell my secretary, "Rico" and make her answer back "Suave." Sometimes when it gets to be about the 34th time of the day she uses a different word to answer me back, but I won't get into that right now because I'm sure she wouldn't want people to know she has a vocabulary like that.

As soon as I get the money I will let you know and then maybe we could hang out in Australia together. I think it is summer there now or something close to it. We could hit the beaches. I love the beach. Sure, I get the odd beached whale comment, but I don't mind. Hey, will you do me a favor. Will you flush a toilet there and see if the water goes down the opposite direction? I'll wait. Go ahead.

Anyway, I really wanted to thank you again. This is like the best day I have had since I discovered dirty martinis. Now that I think about it though the next day was awful. Apparently olive juice is not necessarily a good thing for your digestive tract if you drink a quart of it. But live and learn I suppose.

EL

Daily Mirror Blind Item

Which singer is secretly cheating on his girlfriend with a curvy blonde? The Brit in question can't help himself and strays away most weekends...

Steve Guttenberg Working Out - Naked

Yeah, the headline is correct. So, before you press play on the YouTube thing you better be ok with bare backside footage and some blurred frontal. Apparently Steve Guttenberg is trying to get some attention. He has been staging things in New York and capturing them on film. I'm guessing it is going to be some reality show pilot or something he is trying to sell. This video which is pretty funny takes place in Central Park. Steve takes his jogging seriously, but enjoys doing it without pants and doesn't seem to mind who notices.

Michael Crichton - RIP

One of my favorite authors. One of the most brilliant people ever.

In a statement released by his family, this is what they had to say about his contribution to the world.

"Through his books, Michael Crichton served as an inspiration to students of all ages, challenged scientists in many fields, and illuminated the mysteries of the world in a way we could all understand. He will be profoundly missed by those whose lives he touched, but he leaves behind the greatest gifts of a thirst for knowledge, the desire to understand, and the wisdom to use our minds to better our world."

Pamela Anderson Does Live In A Trailer

It almost sounds like a punch line or something you have always wanted to say, but Pamela Anderson who the world has long suspected of having a Jerry Springer-esque lifestyle is actually living in a trailer. I was going to make some derogatory comments about trailer living but then realized that people have internet in trailers. Sure, they are probably "borrowing" their wireless signal from somewhere, or instead paying their neighbor $5 an hour for internet access but they do have it. But only until 10pm because that is when Earl starts charging $20 an hour because the men come over to watch porn.

If you think about this in an entirely stereotypical trailer way and in no way how I believe trailer people live, Pam has been married at least three times, had her ex-husband thrown in jail, was paid to have sex by a guy she later married, has an incurable disease, is a single parent, her parents disapprove of her lifestyle, and sleeps with her ex when she feels like it. Sounds like a Springer episode to me. All we need is a fight between Tommy Lee and Kid Rock over Pamela and she spurns them both and brings Verne Troyer out as her new man.

Pamela Anderson is living in a trailer because her house is being renovated. "I live in a mobile home and I love it! It's small but chic and perfect for me and the kids. It's fun having to sit on beanbags and do our washing at the laundrette."

Umm, has anyone seen photos of Pamela doing laundry outside somewhere? I thought she was living with Tommy anyway. Wasn't it one of those things where she lived at his place and if she didn't bring anyone home and he didn't bring anyone home that they had sex together that night? I seem to recall her saying that when she was doing press for her failed reality show. So, forgive me if I don't necessarily believe she is out there shoveling quarters into a machine and buying detergent from a vending machine. Yeah, I've been there. I know what it is like and I don't see her doing it.

I guess living in a trailer though does give some truth to the saying that when the trailer is a rockin, don't come a knockin. They must love her at the park. Hell, Earl though probably isn't making his $20 an hour at night now because everyone just tries to look through Pam's windows.

Carrie Underwood Really Isn't Shy

I have spent a great deal of time saying negative things about Carrie Underwood. I still am not a fan of hers but I will say one thing she has going for her is that she is not afraid to speak her mind and it doesn't matter who she irritates in the process. I kind of admire that quality. I hate all the butt kissing and making everyone happy attitude that seems to permeate most celebrity conversations or responses and so it is just refreshing to actually see someone speak their mind. I don't always agree with what she says, but I respect the fact she has an opinion she is willing to share.

She was quoted yesterday that she loses all respect for celebrities who announce who they are voting for and that celebrities should just keep their mouths shut. "It's saying that the American public isn't smart enough to make their own decisions ... music is where you go to get away from all the BS."

Well, I don't know what music has to do with it unless you just wanted to steer the conversation to your new record, but good job on that segue. The thing is that I don't think celebrity opinion matters for a whole lot when it comes to voting. If you are basing your vote on the advice of someone like Heidi Montag, Paris Hilton, or Lindsay Lohan then, you probably don't deserve a vote.

I think most people in the world are not swayed by a celebrity political endorsement, but I also think the celebrity has the right to say whatever the hell they want to say and to say it loud. If "everyday people" can say who they support and put up yard signs and make phone calls then what is wrong with a celebrity doing it? They have a right to participate in the process. Carrie Underwood doesn't make those determinations. Many, many people choose to keep who they are voting for to themselves which is what Carrie does. That is fine as well. That is your right. It would be funny though if everyone kept their opinions to themselves. There would be no rallies or volunteers. There would be no bumper stickers. There would be no parties or polling. Everything would be just really quiet until Election Day. Interesting.

Is $10 Million Too Much?

About a month ago I posted something about how Terri Seymour was given a Beverly Hills house by Simon Cowell which was valued at about $5M. Turns out that is not all she got in their split. Simon also gave her $5M in cash as well. So, ten million bucks for several years with Simon Cowell. Is it worth it? Would you do it? I am wondering if she had to sign some kind of confidentiality agreement. I would imagine she did, although Simon's rep basically confirmed all the payments to Terri.

"This isn’t the kind of thing he usually comments about." Well, does he usually pass out checks for $10M to women? I mean there is not a big frame of reference here for whether he usually comments on these things. "Yeah, he comments about them when they get to $20M, but if it is just $10M it is another day in the office."

I think Simon would probably be a pain in the ass to deal with, but I am too and I'm not handing out $10M checks. I think they genuinely loved each other and she just wanted more and he didn't. So, she split and he thanked her by giving her $10M.

That Near Death Thing Didn't Last Long

So, I'm flipping through photos and stories to see what the hell interests me and would hopefully interest you and I see the photo above from a party last night. Umm, isn't that Taylor Momsen at the party, not looking exactly like she almost died or close to death or whatever her doctor's said? I would have thought after such a life threatening condition that she would have taken the opportunity to rest for more than a few days before going back out and partying. I mean she is, what, like 14? She shouldn't be out partying on a school night anyway. That is probably how she got sick in the first place.

To me should looks like the picture of health so I guess she can go out. Of course maybe it was not a throat infection that laid her up but something else. Maybe it was not a life or death thing but people started wondering where she was. Maybe she felt left out because the others in Gossip Girl get more attention. I don't know and so far I have not found anyone that interviewed her last night to ask how she was feeling which is odd considering there were obviously press there.

Hef Isn't Having Sex - At Least With Holly

Yesterday in the NY Daily News I saw that Holly Madison was trying to get attention again by spilling more about Hef. If she isn't careful she is going to lose her job as a "photo editor." Please all she did was look at photos and if she stumbled on the right one it got in. Anyway, she was going on about how Hugh Hefner is high maintenance and I was thinking to myself, "Duh. The guy is 80 something, has lived in the same house for 40 years, wears his pajamas all day and a has a curfew for everyone." I mean I would have thought she would see this going in. So, I didn't really think it was worth a post. But then this morning I read it again and I saw that Holly is complaining about her sex life or lack thereof.

"I haven't had sex in a really long time," she said. "And that's the honest truth."

Now how would you define a really long time. I mean there are some people who would probably define 8 hours as a long time and others who would say 8 years is a long time. Again, the man is 80 something and I don't care how much Viagra he takes, if he is trying to keep three women happy at once at that age, someone is going to be left out. I never heard her complaining when she was getting paid and trying to be Hef's wife and have his baby about her lack of sex. So, now that they have broken up she keeps saying all of these things about him, and I'm wondering if she really even cared for the guy or just wanted to trap him. The fact that she is with Criss Angel now is enough for me to realize that Hef made the right choice in not getting serious with her.

NY Post Blind Items

WHICH aggressive TV, stage and movie actor has a shady past? Rumor is he sexually assaulted a girl while in high school and his family had the situation "swept under the rug" .

WHICH screen god isn't as happy as he and his paramour would like the world to think? Whenever the couple and their children are in LA, he "goes to a bar in a Beverly Hills hotel and drinks for hours before going home" .

WHICH oft-photographed socialite/designer is losing her grip on the fashion world? Luxury brands no longer send her clothing and accessories and don't want her in their ad campaigns.

Vote

There are few things that make me get out of bed early other than grits made by mom, but one of them is voting. I am a before work voter because I'm always afraid I will get stuck at work and not be able to vote. I love voting. I wish I lived in Chicago in the 60's so I could have voted more than once. I don't care if it is a school board election, I am out there. I do hope that for those of you in the United States that you will vote today. I don't care who you vote for. If there is a Marxist Leninist candidate and you feel their love, then vote for them. Whoever it is or what party it is or what issue it is, you need to make your voice heard. The thing is that you need to vote because it is only when everyone votes that we truly have a participatory process that involves everyone. Is that redundant? I don't know. Anyway, do make time to vote.

Today's Blind Items - Kindness

A list actress. Hell, she isn't just an actress, she is also a producer and a very successful one at that. About three months ago our actress was in downtown LA and was headed for dinner. She saw a family that was huddled about 50 feet from the restaurant. Obviously homeless, the dad had a sign while the mom watched their two children. Our actress could have just gone into her dinner, but, instead walked over to the family and started asking them about their life. It was during this that one of her dinner companions also showed up at the restaurant. Through no fault of their own this family was stuck. This actress could have walked away, but instead she canceled her dinner plans, got the family to a hotel and got them some food. Over the course of the next week she found them a place to live, hired the husband for her company, helped the mom get the kids in school and found a job for the mom as well.

Random Photos Part One

If you get Bette Midler and 50 Cent in the same photo you get the top spot. That is truly a random photo.

Was I the only one who didn't think Ainsley Harriott's show was decent. I liked it. It seemed different from all the rest of the blah talk shows.

I believe this marks a first appearance anywhere on the blog for Bryant Gumbel.

For once I'm not going to get on a celebrity for not smiling on the red carpet. In fact, I have a great deal of respect and admiration for Brooke Smith for showing up at a charity event knowing she was going to be asked repeatedly about being fired. Do you know how much that must have sucked for her, but she still went through it all, walked the red carpet, posed for photos and lived up to her obligations. I'm now seriously reconsidering whether I should have put her in the top spot.

Win a World Series, the next thing you know if you are Cole Hamels is that people actually care about you. Sure you are promoting crystal at Macy's, but its still money.

Look what I found in Australia. It's Chris Isaak. How many of you just started humming Wicked Game? Come on. I know I did when I saw his photo. Damn that it is a good song.

One of my favorite Iron Chefs.

It has been awhile since I have posted Chloe Sevigny, but if she keeps wearing normal clothes like this, you may see more of her.

I figured I owed you a photo of Daniel Craig without the sling. I asked someone the other day if they were getting bored of seeing Daniel Craig. I believe they said, "Umm. It's Daniel Craig."

A blast from the past. Joanna Cassidy. I always hate using that expression because then I have to think of Brendan Fraser and Alicia Silverstone in the film of that same name.

One of my favorite character actors of all time is James Hong.

Had Andy Roddick earlier today so here is another tennis player, Lleyton Hewitt.

Is Matthew Broderick wearing what my Canadian friends would call a toque. I think I spelled it wrong. I always spell it wrong.

Since the last time we saw Mark Ruffalo he has grown a beard. A great big bushy beard.

Razorlight - London

I believe this is also a first time appearance of Regis Philbin and his lovely wife Joy. Have you ever watched old clips of Regis from the Joey Bishop show. It was like 50 years ago, and he looks exactly the same.

So, I finally started reading Twilight so I would know what all the young people were talking about. Good story but I feel like the author only had 12 year olds in mind when she wrote it.

Shows how much entertainment news I know. I didn't even know Sophie Ellis Bextor was even married.

My favorite photo of the day is allegedly a tea at the Dorchester Hotel. I've never had tea there, but I'm guessing that is not the usual waitress for high tea they have there. I just love seeing Slash and Ozzy together. I think it is cool.

An odd pairing of the day is Stella McCartney and Chrissie Hynde.

Snow Patrol - London

Take That - London

Umm. Where Have I Seen This Before?

So, I was looking through various sites to find you a blind item for today when I stumbled across this doozy on the NY Post website from Friday.

October 31, 2008 --

WHICH blockbuster director has only himself to blame for his recent burglary? After a hard day of filming, he decided to unwind with a couple of prostitutes who stole his valuables.

To me that looks remarkably similar to the one I posted a few weeks earlier. I think the date was October 9th. Of course mine had more detail, but you would think that an organization with the resources of the NY Post could find their own blind items, and would have heard about it several weeks earlier. Of course I'm also willing to reveal mine and will do so in January. What will the NY Post do?

I Choose To Believe

There has been a a great deal of controversy over the past two days in the UK about whether or not the Vanity Fair shoot of Kate Winslet has been airbrushed and photoshopped beyond recognition. Whether it is because I love Kate Winslet, or because I know how hard she was slammed for the extensive airbrushing that was done when she posed for GQ, I choose to believe that this time she means it when she said the only thing removed were some blemishes and altering some skin color to make it blend.

In her earlier spread for GQ it was revealed they basically made her several sizes thinner and she came out and apologized for that. Kate has always been on the side of women being proud of who they are and what they have and that no one should shy away from a curvier figure. Obviously as a man of extensive curves, I also find there is nothing wrong with them. To me every person should be proud of who they are and how they look and if someone doesn't like it, screw them. I think she looks great in these photos, but I will let you decide if they have been extensively altered or not. I say they have not.

Definitely Worth Your Time

If you have not had a chance to see Ricky Gervais present the top ten list from Letterman last night, you really should spend three minutes now doing so. Hilarious.

Andy Roddick Decides Not To Get Naked

I guess I somehow missed this blurb from the Elton John AIDS benefit auction earlier this year, but apparently one of the items up for bid was a tennis lesson with Andy Roddick. Pretty cool if you love tennis. But, to make it even better, it was presented as Andy Roddick giving you a lesson while naked. So, of course that enticement got everyone bidding and some woman decided that an hour of Andy naked was worth $11,000.

Well, with the deadline for the tennis lesson approaching, Andy is having second thoughts and doesn't want to play tennis naked with the woman.

He says that naked tennis was not part of the deal, but the woman who bid, absolutely bid on naked tennis with Andy.

"First and foremost, I am not going to be playing naked tennis. It was said in jest and the lady who bid was really cool afterwards."

I'm sure she was cool when you gave her a bunch of her money back. From what I understand everyone bid based on the knowledge that Andy would be naked. I mean why else would you spend $11,000 for a one hour tennis lesson with him? Of course I don't know why people would spend $50,000 to go to lunch with Beyonce so I could be wrong. The only auction thing that has seemed worth it to me is the one where someone paid $5000 or something like that to be the guest of Colin Firth at a premiere. I'm on the lookout for one of those for the future.

Believe It Or Not

When I think of Beyonce I don't usually picture her in the back of the plane with the rest of us "everyday people." But in a recent interview she said she doesn't care if she is back in the cheap seats as long as people leave her the hell alone.

"Even now I sometimes fly economy if I need to. We had a storm in Miami and there was a hurricane coming so we just got out."
She adds, "You know the airlines where if you're fifth in line, you sit in seat five? And then they throw a peanut at you with your drink? I don't care about those kind of things. It's just that people don't give me peace, that's the hardest thing."

So, apparently if you sit in First Class it is ok to bother Beyonce, but if you are like the rest of us and want to see her, then she is off limits. I mean there has to be some kind of screening process right? She has to keep the commoners away somehow. What she didn't say in this interview was that she was probably in a window seat and had ten people surrounding her so I don't know how she wasn't able to enjoy her peace.

I do think also that she does care about those things like the cheaper airlines. Who here thinks she would have married Jay-Z if he always took her everywhere in the back of the plane and never sprung for First Class or a private jet. I think that would have lasted one time and then Beyonce would have moved on to the next person who was willing to to treat her like the diva she thinks she is.

Justin Long Is The New Scott Baio

I would have never guessed that Justin Long would turn into the latest version of Scott Baio or Wilmer Valderrama, but apparently I was wrong. Justin Long has done the impossible. He has gone from A list to I will f**k anything that walks list. As you may remember Justin was doing the hot and nasty with Drew Barrymore for awhile. When she decided to move on to someone who didn't look 16, Justin went with that B list standby Kirsten Dunst. Apparently he tired of her rather quickly and decided to move down the totem pole to, get this..Wait for it. Tila Tequila. Yes friends you heard me right. According to the NY Post, Justin and Tila flew from LA together and hit Vegas where Justin made Tila give him lap dances while she made out with him.

So, the next time your mind wanders and you are thinking about Justin Long and his boyish looks, you might want to take a second and think to yourself that maybe PC isn't so bad after all. Sure, he is a bit of a dork, wears glasses and has a weight problem, BUT, he hasn't had Tila Tequila's tongue in his mouth. I say that, but honestly can any of us be sure who she has and has not been with? I mean if she goes both ways, then I guess she could do both Mac and PC.

D Listers Are The Worst

I want you to know that the headline above refers in no way to Michael K or the great people who read his site. Instead, what I'm talking about is the attitude that most C & D listers take compared to everyone else. An A lister can be an ass. There is no question about that. But, many of them are the victims of their "people" who are trying to justify their jobs by making demands in the name of the person they represent. What I find to be most true is that the biggest jerks and divas are the new rich so to speak. The ones who suddenly find themselves famous after years of trying. The worst diva whether it be male or female is someone who has just a touch of popularity. They generally make the most demands because it is the first time they have ever been in a position to make demands rather than just being jealous of those who do.

The latest example of someone who has let fame go to their head is Kathy Griffin. Kathy, who used to be an accessible celebrity has become more of a diva than her former co-star Brooke Shields has ever been.

The NY Daily News reported today that at a party in NY that was for charity, all the other celebrities including Bette Midler tried to meet every fan that was there. What did Kathy do? Sat at her table in a corner and sulked while her bodyguard shielded her from anyone who tried to approach her and talk. I never understood that behavior. Why go to an event if you are just going to sit apart and just be stared at. Do you enjoy being stared at? Do you enjoy people seeing you have a bodyguard and a table to yourself? Do you enjoy having people approach you only to see your bodyguard turn them away? Is that how you get off? Is that why you went?

One fan even managed to get her when Kathy got up for some reason. Probably to check to make sure someone had heated the toilet seat in the bathroom or something. When the fan said hi, Kathy acted as if nothing had been said and just moved along. Nice.

Daily Mirror Blind Item

Which popular male singer is hiding a hairy secret?

His dandruff has got so bad, his flunkies are having to go out and buy him industrial strength supplies of special shampoo...

More About FW

A couple of things. After the reception Jax got today, I think most of you may want to reconsider those lunch plans with me. Jax has been reading and commenting on the blog forever and also has a very tough skin. I usually let everyone just have at it on the site, but all Jax did was agree to go to lunch with me, and so I feel really bad that she is getting hammered for that. Everyone can take as many shots at me as they want. It is part of the blog, and I'm fine with it, but to give someone a hard time for going to lunch with me seems a bit excessive. Jax, I know I speak for everyone when I say we love you. And if they won't say it, I will, and I would go to lunch with you everyday if you pay for the drinks. And the food. I mean I would be buying the airplane ticket so there has to be some give and take. Jax is funny and smart and I consider her to be a great friend who has always been there.

The hammering someone for no reason made me think of FW. I bring that up because many of you have e-mailed me today asking about FW and that whole situation. I know that I seem like the cuddly teddy bear type and I am, but before everyone thinks that FW would be crazy for not wanting to be with me there is something you should know. Since, FW doesn't write, I want to make sure her side of every story is always heard.

I previously mentioned all the baggage I bring to the table. I once compared it to the luggage hold of a 747. When you have been through as much as I have, and are living in the basement of your parent's home you start to feel like a beaten man. That is how FW found me. How would you like a guy who has no self esteem, hates his job, has a trail of ex-wives and alimony payments and lives at home? Well, she took the chance to be my friend and through literally thousands of hours conversations built me back up to the obnoxious guy all of you love.

It was at about that time that I first decided I wanted to be with FW. At this point we had not been friends that long, but because someone was actually being nice to me, I just jumped right in and basically became a love sick idiot. I would say stalkerish but that is going just a touch too far.
Well, all of that attention was probably not the best thing I could have done, but I worked at it. Everything was going much better until one day we got into an argument. I'm not much of a fighter. I'm a lover by nature. Not a very good one as the ex-wives will attest, but still, a lover. Fighting with someone you love is much different than fighting someone in court and I did not handle it well. I said so many things that were mean and hurtful and became someone I never want to be again. I can't believe I said some of the things I did. It was like all I was doing was trying to be mean and hurtful, which is not who I am or what I ever want to be. All I have to do is think about that day and I am reminded of how miserable I was after, and how miserable I will be forever. You can't take back things you say. God you wish you could and it isn't what you are feeling inside. The day I regret most in my life is that day. How can someone say such hurtful things about someone they love more than anything in the world? Just thinking about it makes me hurt inside.

It says a lot about FW that not only didn't she abandon me, but that she is still my best friend. So, telling her that I want to be with her, is not the same as making it true or making it happen. I don't know if it ever will happen, but I know that if it doesn't, it is not because of anything that she has done or will ever do. It will be because of me, and my failings as a person. Do I hope that she will overlook them? Hell yes. But to me, she has already done more than I ever had any right to expect. If she ever takes that next step, it would make me the happiest guy in the world, but if she doesn't and just stays my friend, I will still be the happiest guy in the world because everyday I spend talking to her is the best day of my life. I'm grateful for her everyday and I hope she knows that. I'm also grateful for all of you who read the blog and comment. I just think that sometimes we need to think about why we are attacking someone and for what purpose. It was lunch. It wasn't politics or whether Denise Richards even needed a costume on Halloween.

Today's Blind Items

Well costumes can be fun for everyone. This actually happened the night prior to Halloween, but costumes were still worn. Our B list actor who used to be an A list action hero was at a party with someone everyone assumed to be his girlfriend. His girlfriend is somewhat, but not overly famous, but this person was wearing a Sue Storm from Fantastic Four mask so no one could tell. Throughout the night the pair spent more and more time groping and kissing in a corner and on a couch and less time mingling. It was during one of these makeout groping sessions later in the evening that the mask slipped off the woman and it was discovered our action star was with another guy.

Random Photos Part One

Shakir Stewart - RIP

Ahmad Rashad and his wife Sale. That must be really confusing when someone asks her about shopping. "Is there a Sale?" "Yes, she will be there."

B-52's - New York

This is some kind of world record. Two consecutive events where Bai Ling has been wearing clothes.

See a lot of Matthew Modine lately. Don't usually see Cari Modine.

Dan Ackroyd. Have not seen him in a very long time.

Dashboard Confessional - Newark

Gabriella Cilmi - Manchester

Gavin Rossdale looks really good here.

While his wife gets in the early Christmas spirit, or she could have just been dressing up the baby as an elf for Halloween.

Heidi Klum wins the award for best celebrity costume.

Probably the best Hayden Panettiere has ever looked.

A blast from the past. Jacqueline Bisset looks amazing.

Ummm. Didn't think through the whole taking a photo with the words on knuckles thing.

Too much Kate Beckinsale, but look at the photo of her daughter. If that doesn't freak you out, then nothing will.

Leonardo DiCaprio participating in one of my favorite pastimes. Pocket pool.

Another person you don't see out much is Lou Diamond Phillips.

Our monthly look in to see if Mickey Rourke is still alive. Check out the smoke ring.

Mrs. Tori Spelling finally had his son visit from Canada.

The odd pairing of the day. Pink and Jeremy Piven.

A pairing from way back in the day. Peter Bogdanovich and Cybill Shepherd.

Plain White T's - Newark

Ryan Reynolds looks pretty damn fresh for just running a marathon. I guess that even though Katie Holmes was in New York this year, she just didn't have time.

Bruno at a Proposition 8 rally. This lasted for about five minutes before he got mobbed so it will be interesting to see if it makes it in the film.

Snoop Dogg lighting up in Australia. But its legal. Probably.

Like father, like son. Probably my favorite photo of the day.

A bunch of SNL veterans.

And why pay money to go to a wax museum when you can just get the Spanish royal family to stand in place for you.

NY Post Blind Items

WHICH sister of a much-photographed socialite should be more discreet? She was at Dorrian's Red Hand the other night, making out until closing time with O.J. Simpson murder trial witness Keith Zlomsowitch, who had a sexual encounter with Nicole Brown Simpson .

WHICH former TV star gets Botox injections when she goes in for hair and makeup? The Hollywood mom avidly avoids the paparazzi, but is very friendly to photographers on the red carpet - after being fully prepped of course.

About Damn Time

Some of you may have been wondering wtf was going on Friday afternoon. No, Four For Friday and everything late. Well, believe me, if you saw some of the peen that I decided to not post on FFF, you would not have had the stomach to worry about any missing blind items. Friday just happened to be a very busy day for me and I also had to leave work early to catch a flight and so things just got frantic at the last minute.

Normally I don't really talk about my trips unless it is to Vegas or some other suitable place of debauchery, but this time I thought I would share a little something. It all started a few weeks ago when I found out I was going to have to go to Vancouver for business. I don't really like flying much anymore because I have been shunned to the two seat section. For those of you who are wonderfully thin, it means the airline makes me buy two seats so some poor thin person doesn't have to get stuck next to me.

Anyway, once I knew I was going to Vancouver, FW told me that I had to finally meet jax. As a frequent reader, FW knows all about jax and said if I was going to be in Vancouver, that the least I could do was to ask her if she wanted to go to lunch. FW is good that way. She has manners and grace and I don't. Before I get into lunch with jax, I need to say that I finally caved and told FW how I felt about her. It was a hard thing to do because FW has a lot going on in her life and certainly doesn't need me to complicate things. I want to make her life easy, but a 400 pound man with six ex wives carries a lot of baggage. FW has a very nice, safe existence right now and getting together with me, is not necessarily a joy worth experiencing.

I think another issue is I have this blog and she reads it. I can say what I want and she really can't. I'm a very big guy, and an adult and am going into this with hope, but again, I bring a lot to the table. If it doesn't work out, it is not FW's fault. It would be 100% mine. I really hope that someday she will write something on here. She is probably the most amazing person I have ever met in my life. She puts up with so much crap from me and so much of my drama, but is always there. Any mistakes that have ever been made in our friendship have all been mine.

Wow, that was more than I intended. And, I know all of you want to hear about lunch. So, I e-mailed jax and she was all for it. One of my friends was going to be visiting Vancouver and agreed to go so that way there wouldn't be any awkward pauses. Well, for some reason Friday night I got my drunk on. I know, I know, but I found myself at a Denny's at 7am, and drinking wine straight from the bottle in my hotel room at 8am. My friend came over around 11 because she wanted to take me to this cool place called Bacchus. Of course there we drank a bottle of champagne and I had two or three other drinks and the next thing you know I am 30 minutes late for my lunch with jax.

Well, lunch started out at the art gallery where we could test the waters in a public place, and frankly it is good for me to walk sometimes. I don't exercise much. So, the three of us walked and talked and looked at feminist exhibit which seemed to feature an inordinate number of female sexual organs in very large sizes.

But, then it was time for lunch. My friend knew of a place that had great drink specials, so we went to some place called Cactus Cafe and my friend and I blew through six drinks each and a massive amount of food while jax just sipped her one drink biding her time. Waiting to pounce.

Well, I guess the plan was to get me hammered, and my tongue loose and jax wanted to be sober for that. Four hours of questioning later, another 5 drinks and a waitress who looked like Reese Witherspoon in Election and about as f**king cheery and it was time for my nap. So, they rolled me out to a cab and shoved me inside. I have to say that I loved meeting jax, and that I appreciate her and all of you that make this such a great place to be everyday. I don't even remember everything I said or revealed, but do know when I left I was sweating even more than normal. So, you never know. If I have some business in your city, you never know when you might get an e-mail asking you out to lunch too.

Just Makes You Eat More

CNN has a story today about how Twinkies are going to be sold in 100 calorie snack packs now. Umm, if you are a person like me who eats Twinkies the last thing you are really concerned about is how many calories they are. I would prefer not knowing actually that a speck the size of my thumb is 100 calories. My main concern with a Twinkie is whether or not I can find a way to deep fry it not limiting myself to 100 calories.

This whole snack pack thing is the rage now because people they figure still want sweets but will just limit it to 100 calories. That isn't the way it works though. The way it works is that it lets you add up the calories you are eating as you open each pack and for those of you who are health conscious you start rationalizing with yourself over each new pack being opened. What is 100 or 200 calories you say to yourself. Eventually when you get to package number 6 or 7 you realize you could have saved two dollars, the environment some paper and using your fingers and toes as a calculator by just buying the regular size in the first place.

Even Kneepads Has A Bad Day

I guess even the most ass kissiest publication in the free world sometimes wakes up on the wrong side of the bed. Either that or the person who edited the story is new and came from someplace like a blog and snark. The above photo is the one People magazine used in their story talking about the wedding of Picabo Street. Besides having one of the coolest names around, Picabo, also has won a gold medal in skiing.

The story came because Picabo or her publicist or someone called and told People that Picabo got married October 25th. Apparently when your 15 minutes are up, good news travels much slower. So slow in fact that many marriages would have been over by this time. It must suck thinking you are somewhat of a celebrity, get married in front of a ton of people, have designers make clothes for you and yet, still no tabloid cares. Well, People does. At least to an extent. If Picabo or the publicist was handing out this "exclusive" don't you think they could have provided a photo that wasn't from the 9th grade ski club yearbook photo. This is the picture she wants the world to associate with her wedding?

Hopefully People will correct this and pay her an obscene amount of money for her real wedding photos. Congratulations to the couple.

Another One Bites The Dust

Somewhere in this vast archive of blind items is one about the relationship between DeAnna Pappas and Jesse Csincsak. Don't know where it is exactly but I will find it. DeAnna announced that she and he fiancee who she found on the Bachelorette have split up and head their separate ways. She will donate her ring to charity which is a nice touch.

So, in my mind I think there is still only one married couple from that show, and one couple that has been together forever but are not married. I just think that in that kind of situation it is very difficult to find any kind of true love because you don't spend any time with that person. It is a game, it is not love. It is about getting as much attention for yourself as possible and getting your 15 minutes of fame and hopefully earning a few bucks along the way. I can't imagine that anyone goes into it actually thinking they are going to get married. I think most people go into these types of show wondering how they can stand out from the crowd so they can end up getting paid to host parties at Vegas clubs.

If It's True You Have To Admire It

When you are Jean Claude Van Damme, career opportunities don't come quite as quickly or easily or pay as well as they used to. So, when the chance to do some press for his new film came along and was going to put him in the limelight for a little while again, you know he was desperate for it. But, according to the NY Post, Jean Claude decided to pass on all the promotional appearances because one of his dogs is in a coma and just couldn't bear to leave it right now.

Apparently, Jean Claude lives in Thailand and he just adopted seven puppies and this is one of those puppies. Now, I know I am always a cynic, but there really is not any reason to lie or make up this story. Jean Claude was going to get a bunch of press for this film so he really didn't need this. He would get more attention for the film press than he will for this.

So, I choose to believe he is doing this out of the goodness of his heart, and also because he knows that he can always get out there in a few weeks. I like seeing actors though putting someone or something ahead of themselves on the priority list.

Fashion Icon?

Two things I never thought I would see together are Mary Kate Olsen and the term fashion icon. Apparently someone must think she is because in an interview she recently gave she was asked what its like to be such a respected fashion icon throughout the world. Umm. Mary Kate doesn't even usually wear clothes. She usually just grabs the first piece of fabric she sees in the morning, grabs her cigarettes, coffee and ten pound sunglasses and heads for the door. I don't think of her as having anything positive to do with fashion.

Not so according to the interviewer who must have got her training at People or by Larry King. According to the interviewer, girls all over the world have rushed to copy every bit of Mary Kate's style and anxiously await to see what she is going to wear next. Is she sure she has the right person? Does anyone you know scan US and People just hoping to see what Mary Kate is wearing and then rushing out to their dumpster to see if someone threw it away.

Here is what Olsen had to say about the whole icon thing. "For me it was laziness. I wore my pyjamas and threw on whatever was warm enough. It still amazes me. It's just layers and it doesn't make any sense to me at all."

So how come if Mary Kate knows that her being a fashion icon is a bunch of crap, the interviewer doesn't. Even after Mary Kate says it doesn't make any sense she asked where Mary Kate got her ideas and her inspiration and totally ignored the fact that Mary Kate just said she doesn't have a style except for laziness. She is like the Adam Sandler of the female persuasion when it comes to clothes. Sandler always wears t-shirts and shorts. He's lazy and doesn't care, but I don't see people running to him and calling him a fashion icon so what makes it different for Mary Kate?

Bye Bye Bridget

Just when I thought Bridget Marquardt might get to be the star this year of Girls Next Door and give me a reason to watch, it looks as if that won't be the case. In an interview over the weekend Bridget was dropping hints that she won't be long for the house. I am hoping that she is going to be in some of the new season because I feel like she didn't get enough attention focused on her. I mean with Holly Madison basically controlling who got to be seen, Bridget seemed to be left out of a great deal. Everything basically centered on Holly and how she was the best and smartest and had the best fake breasts.

Every now and again she would show us Kendra if Kendra looked like an idiot, but Bridget was basically forced to the sidelines all of the time unless it was specifically about someone in her family coming to visit. Of course since Bridget is married, and getting a PhD and is about ten years older than Hef's ideal, it is no wonder she doesn't want to be there anymore.

NY Daily News Blind Item

Which sexy starlet keeps blabbing that she can’t stand her faux boyfriend? The producers of her hit show hooked the young couple up as a publicity stunt, but she says that every time she has to smooch him in front of the paparazzi, it’s like “Frenching a lizard.”