Today's Blind Item

So, I changed my mind about a blind item. This celebutard has a world of positive publicity right now from every corner of the earth. Know the quickest way to lose it? By dating a married woman. Sure, the woman is a B- film actress but her ticket to A list will die quickly if this scandal hits. Do you know who she is? Maybe. But she has been, and is going to be in some of the biggest movies of the year. You would definitely recognize her face. Our celebutard has serious A+ name recognition right now. Oh, and she is considered a newlywed by any definition which makes this extra juicy, extra scandalous, and extra career threatening.

Four For Friday

There is not going to be a Four For Friday today. I know, I know. Put down the hankies. But, on the good news front, it is only six more days until the day.

Random Photos Part One - With Reader Photos

Eartha Kitt - RIP

John Costelloe - RIP
Unlike some former child actors, Alyssa Milano only passes out food for charity and not as their career.
Bono and his wife at U2's Christmas party. I'm sure the entire evening was devoted to Bono telling the assembled how he should just be sainted right now. At the party was Chris Martin who was without his wife. Where was she?
Ms. Paltrow was at Madonna's Christmas party.
Judging from the look on Cruz Beckham's face he would rather have gone to McDonalds instead of Gordon Ramsay's for dinner.
Just like to throw in a random UK star now and again. Here is Delta Goodrem.
Wow. You know I love Gwen Stefani, but I now know what she is going to look like when she is 80.
Jennifer Lopez was wearing the ring, but all alone doing her shopping. I have not seen her out with her kids in awhile either.
Speaking of kids, what in the name of Santa Claus is Mel B's oldest daughter wearing? And on a side note of snark, how much do you want to bet that Michael Belafonte "borrowed" some money from Mel to get whatever he is eating.
Melissa Joan Hart also serving food, but apparently taking a break while all the homeless wait in line wondering why everyone is taking photos.
Melissa Gilbert looks great. Hell, so does Bruce Boxleitner.
"One more crack about the beard, and I'm going to reinstate debtor's prison."
"Did you happen to see your brother's beard. Why I haven't laughed that hard since his dad had one."

Reader Photo #1
And Reader Photo #2. Are those for me?
If Zara Phillips spins fast enough she can actually get off the ground a little.

Your Turn

Simple and to the point. Worst gift you ever got. I will also accept gift you always wanted but never got, or the worst gift you ever bought someone. Doesn't have to be Christmas. It could be something like your significant other gave you a set of free glasses he got from a free fill up on the way home on your anniversary night.

Strangest Gossip Ever

This has got to be some of the strangest gossip of all time. In the new book Marlon And Me, Marlon Brando's former assistant says that Marlon was so desperate for money in the last year of his life that he met with the shopping channel QVC about selling some kind of product on their network. He really didn't care what the product was, he just wanted to sell something and make some money. OK. So far just slightly wacky. It gets better. What he wanted to sell was either earthquake proof houses which no doubt would have been a huge hit on the channel. "Hey, guess what we have on easy pay today."

His other choices were imported silk or a DVD on acting called Lying For A Living. OK, I could see him selling the last two, so that would not be that wacky, until you consider this kicker.

He was not actually going to sell them as Marlon Brando. Nope. When he had a meeting with the QVC people he told them he wanted to go on air disguised in women's clothing with a grey wig. I don't know if the story is real, but it sure as hell makes you smile thinking about it.

Quick Hits

Tom And Gisele - "Oh Gisele. You got engaged, I'm so happy for you. Where did it happen? How did it happen?" I'll tell you where it happened. Gisele and Tom got engaged on a 25 minute flight from New Jersey to Boston. The flight probably cost more than the ring, and there probably was not enough time for a quickie. Whoops scratch that. Two minutes would be all Tom needed. I'm happy for them, but seriously, I don't care if it is a private jet, that just seems like the most awful way to propose. It's such a short flight they probably didn't even have a chance to get unbuckled. He probably had to yell over the sound of the engines and tossed the ring to her in the air. Well at least we know he can pass.

Come On Get Happy - Shirley Jones' husband was allegedly caught shoplifting hats at a hat store. Yeah, I know there is a fancier name, but give me a break. You know what I mean. I watched the video on TMZ, and I still can't see straight. But, I have been humming Partridge Family tunes all morning so it is probably worth it. Except for the fact that now I can't get Danny Bonaduce and his FFF out of my head. See, that could be worse than the Verne Troyer photo. That image burns as well.

One Final Argument - Kate Walsh and her soon to be ex are arguing over their actual separation date. He says it was five days later than the date she says. Why does it matter? In this case, I can't tell. Usually it matters because you don't get half anymore after that date. If she wants earlier than it's possible she signed some endorsement contract or got some payment that week and so she wants an earlier date so she doesn't have to pay out. Personally I just think they hate each other and will do anything to piss each other off.

Damn You Michael Cera

You might recall that I posted about a month ago about how Michael Cera didn't want anything to do with an Arrested Development movie. My guess it is about money and getting himself a bigger part in it. His camp says that he just felt the show said it all and nothing else needs to be said.

Well the news is that somehow Michael Cera is actually holding up the production of the film. According to a Fancast interview with Arrested creator Mitch Hurwitz, at one point Will Arnett and Michael Cera were holding up production. Will was more of a money thing and has been "gung ho" about the project since day one. But, Hurwitz said that Michael Cera is causing the whole thing to be halted. My question is how? Write him out. Who the hell needs him for the film? I don't know if he is being wishy washy and so they don't know to write him in or out, or if the producers are so desperate to tap into the Superbad crowd that they will give in to his demands.

Honestly, you don't need him. His movies have not done well. He is completely one dimensional and I think the world will be fine if he does not have sex with his cousin on the big screen. Kick him to the curb. Do like the Vacation movies. They did just fine with a different Rusty and Audrey everytime. They were filler and that is what Michael Cera is as well.

We'll Look Like We Didn't Care About The Money

I'm guessing Joe Simpson lost this round, but by God, when Jessica Simpson has a kid he is going to sell photos, video, and if the price is right, have pay per view right in the delivery room. You do realize that is where the whole photo thing is headed right? I think everyone is a little tired of seeing photoshopped parents holding their photoshopped kids in the same damn poses every single time.

How much money would you pay to be live in the hospital room with Angelina Jolie and Brad Pitt as Angelina gave birth? You would not be treated to any NSFW shots, and perhaps not even sound. But how about five or six cameras in the room and you can watch all of them live. Do you know how much people would pay for that? Hell, I might even pay for that. I know it would make a lot more money than selling them to People Magazine. Think of the amount that would go to charity. Of course that would evolve into the actual birth being shown and that would evolve into watching the actual conception which would evolve into which lucky person gets to do it with the celebrity and make them pregnant.

Who Wants To Be A Celebrity Daddy? Great title for a show.

The point of all of this is that Ashlee Simpson and Pete Wentz just went ahead and posted a photo of Manhattan Jungle Book for free. Apparently the money offers were not high enough so they just decided to look like do gooders.

Daily Mirror Blind Item

Which celebrity is torn between her long-term lover and the British gangster actor she's having a hot fling with?

More Boredom Equals Kim Kardashian

When I got done terrorizing myself reading the Lindsay Lohan blog, I decided to become really masochistic and head on over to Kim Kardashian's blog. I mean why the hell not. I was sure it would be filled to the brim with all of her kool aid drinking fans wishing her a happy holidays and probably telling Kim that her Bentley was so much nicer than Paris' Bentley and probably empathizing with her over the fact that Reggie Bush is still no closer to giving her a ring than a year ago. On the subject of that. Umm, Kim. Everytime you get in front of a camera or a guy with a notebook you make sure they know that all Reggie has to do is ask and you will say yes. Without fail, this comes out of your mouth. By now I think Reggie has got the hint. I also know that at the rate he keeps getting injured and the way he is blowing through his money, you may get what you wished for but he might end up marrying you for your money instead of the other way around.

Now, when I went over to her site, instead of the fawning fans, I found a deeply disturbed Kim who said that Courtney Love had defamed her brother and maybe Brody Jenner. Apparently Courtney said that Robert Kardashian broke the nose of Courtney's employee at an altercation at Hyde. I didn't actually realize people still went to Hyde, but hey, it's the holiday's everyone should give to those in need.

Kim says that it is not what happened. She declines to say what actually did happen and instead is going to forward the entire thing to her attorneys. While I do think Courtney is often times out of her mind, it will be interesting to see if the truth matches what Robert told his family. If not, will Kim come back and apologize to Courtney? Probably not. I have a feeling the whole post will just silently vanish much like Kim's career.

I Hate Being Bored

There comes a time on every Christmas Day where you just get bored out of your mind. I think much of that has to do with the fact that with the exception of dinner, the day actually tends to end fairly early. You are left with large gaps of nothing to do but wonder how much one can drink in a day if you started with mimosas at 7am, bloody mary's by 9am and egg nog by noon.

I believe this boredom is why so many movies actually open on Christmas Day and why it is the busiest day of the year for Blockbuster. It could also be the fact that you are so tired of being with your family for three or four days, that everyone needs that two hour respite that a movie offers.

I found myself in such a period yesterday and with not much news to read, I found myself reading Lindsay Lohan's post on her blog more than once. In fact I read it several times. It was slow and it was just so strange.

It was basically a rambler. I think she probably wanted to leave come sweet holiday message but she basically decided to throw her dad under the bus for cheating on her mom while they were married. I believe cheating is pretty awful, but I would be shocked beyond belief if Lindsay had never cheated on a boyfriend. So, I'm not so sure she should be throwing those rocks. She also said that her dad confessed that there is a half sister. Michael still says no. I don't really care about that either.

What is interesting and what made me read it repeatedly is that Ali Lohan has suddenly become Aliana. When did this start? Is this some edict from Mt. St. Dina in an attempt to make Ali sound classier or because she wants to try the whole one name singer thing? I suffered through that Lohan reality show and no one on there ever called Ali anything other than Ali. I swear to you if they try and sell her album with the name Aliana and nothing else, I will go on a Lohan rant fest that will last for weeks.

P.S. Lindsay wants to sleep with Britney, or Samantha does or whoever wrote the blog post.

Ted C. Blind Item

Hot couples earnestly trying to procreate in Hollywood usually get such great, fawning press, just ask Marcia Cross and her man, or Josh Holloway and his gal, if you don't believe. But, what about when it all goes...wrong?

That's the certainly less celebrated coverage you hear about, and for good reason: Smokey Shooter and Mimi Kitten are one smokin' celeb couple—literally. And even though the multitalented lovebirds have a bunch of differences between them (namely, their ages), there's one thing they can settle on: They want a kid. Badly.

But there are two problemos in this offspring sitch:

First up, Mimi's had some issues with her ovaries—they ain't working. So M.K. and Smokey hightailed over to their friendly neighborhood fertility clinic to work it all out with a bit of help from their doc.

A baby would be a better possibility if it wasn't for the second dilemma—Smokey's dabbling in drugs has gone from a weekend hobby to a nearly full-time day gig, and it's messing with the dude's sperm. Too bad, 'cause a baby between these two could give Suri and Shiloh a run for their parents' money.

Get clean, you dopehead! Your woman's got enough probs as it is!

And It Ain't:

Calista Flockhart and Harrison Ford
Jennifer Aniston and John Mayer
Katie Lee Joel and Billy Joel

***Exclusive*** Balthazar Getty Fired From Brothers And Sisters

Wow. Let's see. It is almost 1am here on the west coast Christmas morning. Just got done seeing Jennifer Aniston and the Arquettes chowing down at Mastro's. Poor Alyson Hannigan was also there but no one even noticed her except for me. I have always had a thing for Alyson and keep hoping she will leave her husband and run away to my basement with me. A man can dream can't he? Without dreams then we are just kind of stuck in whatever rut we fall into. Oh, and I am drunk in case you have not noticed.

But, I am not too drunk to know what I heard around town when I was sober and that is that Balthazar Getty has been fired from Brothers And Sisters. I don't know the reason. I don't know if it is because of Sienna or because he was sleeping with someone else on the show or if he just wandered the set looking for twinkies all day and not working. All I do know is his publicist says Balthazar has not been fired, and I of course say his happy ass was canned just in time for the holidays. Balthazar was let go. Dismissed. Given a pink slip. Shown the door. Do you know how hard it is to get fired from a job like this. He must have done something completely f**ked up like snorting mercury or something with Piven in the back room while they looked at porn videos of the daughter of the producers.

Happy Holidays

Happy Holidays everyone. I love having all of you in my life. I hope that wherever you are this week, that you are safe, warm, and filled with the spirit of family and friends. I will see you on Friday.

Today's Blind Items

This B list actor and sometime director, now married was once in a highly publicized relationship. While on location in another country the actor found himself in the VIP room of a member’s only gentleman’s club. Rumors swirled about what happened that night and ended up costing his relationship, but the popular guess was second or third base, at best. What really happened was captured on tape by a security camera of the actor, two ladies, and a lot of um let’s say marital aids of all varieties.

When one of the ladies let it ‘slip’ after the encounter that it was all recorded on security camera the actor demanded the tape from the club owner. After several phone calls and exchanges of all sorts the actor left with tape in hand.

But what the actor didn’t know was that the club had made several copies before the actor even knew it existed and he was just one of several actors caught in the same scam at the exclusive anything goes club. The whereabouts of the other tapes are unknown but I’m sure wherever they are, they came at a high price.

Random Photos Part One - With Reader Photos

I can't believe this. The day after I give the award to Tracy Morgan for shiniest jacket of the year, Ashlee Simpson does this to me. Does she know how difficult it will be to pry the award from Tracy's hands? Damn you Ashlee Simpson.

Yeah. Like the world needed more Clay Aiken.
Does anyone know who the woman with Christina Ricci is? All I know is they have synchronization skills like my favorite Spanish royals.
Well it is the holidays, so I am going to be nice to Denise Richards. Merry Christmas Denise. Oh, and to you too Irv.
Lil Wayne - Oakland
The thing is that they think they look good.
The Griffith family. That is one house I would love to go to for Christmas dinner. That or the O'Neals. Hell put them together and invite me and I would die a happy man.
Another Christmas miracle. Mickey Rourke is actually dressed normally.
Is that wrapping paper or are you just happy to see me?
Who thinks those are real presents under the tree?
Rachel Bilson is on the right and her little sister is in the middle. I have no idea who the woman is on the left.
I almost didn't recognize Robert Downey Jr when I first saw this photo.
Reader Photo #1
And Reader Photo #2
Rob Thomas & John Mayer - New York
This is how you know you are horribly addicted to cigarettes.
A snow leopard at the Bronx Zoo.
A Stephanie Seymour at the Caribbean.
You know what is priceless about this picture? Both of the bags came from the same store. I guarantee you that Will did all of his shopping at one place.

My Favorite Christmas Movies

These are the Christmas movies I tend to watch on a fairly regular basis. Many of them I watch even when it is not Christmas. I don't have them in any particular order. The reason for this is because determining which one is my favorite kind of depends on my mood at the time.

The original Scrooge. Classic and timeless and really hard to find on a channel unless you have it on DVD.


Scrooged is probably my favorite remake of all the Scrooge remakes. Carol Kane is hilarious and Bill Murray can definitely play an ass. Buster Poindexter also makes it really worthwhile.
Wonderful Life. Growing up this seemed like the only Christmas movie that was ever on. I still like it a lot but it is not something I watch every year. I usually need to give it a year off.
If I were to pick a favorite Christmas movie. If someone said you have to pick one. I couldn't. I have a tie among three, but The Ref is in those three. Incredible movie.
Santa Clause is about one of the only things I can bear to watch with Tim Allen. It is a good movie but is the kind you usually watch while wrapping presents and it doesn't matter if you miss five or ten minutes here and there.
You won't believe this. But this was the first year I watched Nightmare Before Christmas and I really liked it. Not in the top three but much better than I thought it would be.
I threw Love Actually in here to make a point about Christmas movies. Love Actually takes place around the holidays, but that does not really mean you should call every movie that does, a Christmas movie. Die Hard is a great movie, but I'm not sure you would consider it a Christmas movie. Same with Batman Returns or whatever the hell that movie is with Katie Holmes.
Barely out of my top 3 is Joyeux Noel which is the true story of a truce during World War I. If you have never seen this movie, you need to.
Home Alone is a classic and I never get tired of watching it.
I like Elf a lot. Not in love with it. Although if The Zooey showed up at my basement in her elf outfit I could be persuaded to change my mind.
Christmas Vacation is definitely in my top 3. Love this movie.
I used to love Christmas Story. Loved it. Then TNT or one of the cable channels started showing it for 24 hours straight and now they have Wonderful Life'd it for me. It is down to a once every three year viewing now.
Definitely in my top 3. I absolutely love this movie.

That's Toys For Tots. Not Toys For Ti*s

Ahh, you have to love the holiday season. Everyone wants to get into the spirit. This of course means the adult industry wants to be involved as well. Sure, there really is not a lot of demand for Christmas porn. There is the classic Mrs. Claus Does The Elves and of course the sure fire winner, Santa Claus and Rudolph's Red Nose.

One strip club in New York is trying to get involved the best they can. Instead of just the usual dancers in Santa Hats they decided to give back to the community and at the same time make more money by getting their patrons drunk off their ass. Turns out that Sapphire West is offering free booze to any customer who brings in a toy for the toy for tots program.

I think that is a great idea because what kids wouldn't want to get a gift from a strip club. I just know though that some guy is going to read the promotion all wrong and some mom on Christmas day is going to have to explain why the package says rabbit, but there is not a furry little creature inside.

NY Daily News Blind Item

Which pop star won’t even throw away her own used hankies? When she gets a case of the sniffles in the recording studio, the high-pitched princess forces an assistant to do it.

Quick Hits

Birthdays - How about this birthday party? Ricky Martin, Ryan Seacrest and Lemmy from Motorhead all share today as their birthday. So, what I want for Christmas is all three of them in a room drunk off their ass with a camera rolling. That would be some fun reality television. You kind of have to close your eyes and imagine it. It makes everything much more fun.

Catwoman - Kate Beckinsale has been telling anyone that will listen that she wants to be Catwoman in the next Batman movie. What she should do is send a bunch of oysters over to Brangelina and hope they work and Angelina Jolie gets pregnant because that is about the only way Kate is going to have a chance to play Catwoman.

Funny Or Die - Will Ferrell's Funny or Die series will be around for awhile. Turns out the company got $3M from some anonymous benefactor. I would think that the website would not need to go out asking people for money. It's not like they are making thousands of films. Will Ferrell should be able to foot the bill. Hell, for making the movie Blades Of Glory he should be just thankful he can still find work.

Worst Movies of The Year - FOX News compiled their list of the worst movies of 2008. They said Seven Pounds was by far the worst. I know it is the most depressing movie of all-time but I had never heard that it was Razzie worthy.

Snot Pays - Some stupid person decided that he (had to be a guy) wanted to catch a cold given to him by Scarlett J. Knowing he would never get her to even acknowledge him because she only acknowledges herself in a mirror several times daily, he decided instead to bid on a kleenex she had sneezed into on Leno. He paid over $5000 for the privilege. Yes, the money went to charity, but is he really going to hang it on the wall of the living room and admit to the story? Well, yeah, if it is a guy he probably will.

Samantha Makes Money Off Lindsay

Ever wonder why Lindsay Lohan is always tagging along with Samantha Ronson when they head off to some dj gig in the middle of nowhere. Oh sure, it could be love and they just can't stand to be apart. It could be the fact that Lindsay doesn't really have anything else going on in her life and so she tags along. But, according to the Daily Express in the UK, they did a little study of how much Samantha was making for her gigs before and after her relationship with Lindsay.

Turns out that a year ago you could get Sam into your club for a night for about $1500. Not bad for a night's work at all, but she wasn't getting rich or anything. Next thing you know she is dating Lindsay Lohan and her fees have gone up to $25,000 for a night plus airfare and expenses and any other goodies she can get. Turns out that although her contract doesn't say Lindsay is going to show up, all of the promoters and club owners know there is a very good chance Lindsay will show up and thus are willing to pay the extra fees.

So, maybe this is how Lindsay is making her money and why Sam keeps Lindsay around.

Now That Is A Classy Christmas

I have always said that nothing quite says the Holidays than sisters with body paint on their breasts. Added to the festive spirit is they are wearing the name of the guy who pays them to be his girlfriend. Hey, but it's Hef right? He can get with this kind of stuff. You know what I find most disturbing about the picture? With all of the airbrush professionals at Playboy and all of Hef's rules, somehow one of the twins managed to hang on to her phone during the actual photo. Is her life that important and that all time consuming that she could not put down the phone for one second while a photo was taken? I can just see her now.

"Yeah. Old dude in the bathrobe. Could we get this over with in the next couple of minutes. My BFF is telling me about this great party I want to go to. God this pain itches. Hey, I'm going to need a few thousand because I told her I would pay for everything tonight. I promise when I get back I will pretend I like you for a couple of hours."

Thanks to Huffington Post for the photo.

When Did He Stop Dating Kate Hudson?

When I was reading all the stories today about Lance Armstrong and his sperm, it occurred to me at some point that his desire to have children may have caused the split between Lance and Sheryl Crow.

Judging by the way Lance likes to impregnate women, I'm wondering if he and Sheryl tried to have a baby and for whatever reason she could not have one naturally. They broke up and she adopted. Don't know why Lance would not want to adopt, unless of course he feels he has to show the world his sperm is stronger than everyone else in the world.

Then, after I got done reminding myself that he has always done the dumping in his relationships and basically acting like an ass, he gets a free pass because of all the work he does for cancer research. His baby is due in June which by my calculations means he and his girlfriend did the deed around September. Ummm. Wasn't Lance dating Kate Hudson in September? If he wasn't dating her, then it must have been like a first date pregnancy thing with his girlfriend and future baby mama. Perhaps Kate Hudson scented out that it was not the Burger King cologne Lance was wearing, but the scent of another woman who he dared sleep with while dating Kate Hudson and spending time with her family. Maybe it was not Lance who dumped Kate, but instead it was she who did the dumping when she found out she had been betrayed by Lance. She threw her hand to her face and declared something about having the vapors and threw him out.

Oh. I forgot. After Kate was Mary Kate Olsen. He gave that a shot but probably decided that as much as he wanted a kid, Mary Kate might not be the best idea for a mother. Mary Kate begat Tory Burch but she was on the Pill so, he moved on to Anna Hansen, who despite the similarity of the last name is not related to the baby factor Hanson family of MMMBop fame.

Wow. He has been busy. I'm too lazy to do the timeline though to see when he went out with all of these people and if he was dating any of them when Anna became pregnant.

Does She Boil The Pies?

The local Fox affiliate in Dallas snagged an interview with Jessica Simpson yesterday. Not that they really had to work hard to get the interview. Unless having Joe Simpson call the station every five seconds to see if they wanted to interview the actress from a #1 movie. I know, I know it was in Russia, but that doesn't mean she isn't billed like that anyway.

Anyway, because it is the holidays, Jessica did her aww shucks routine and said she would rather be home with her man Tony than going out to clubs. This is probably also to avoid being laughed at and mocked, but it is what it is. Then she delivered what is perhaps the best quote of the day.

"Believe it or not, I like to bake pies. Tony’s favorite is pumpkin pie and I haven't mastered that yet. Maybe I'm more of a baker; I like to make cakes, more fattening. I make a good carrot cake."

I just can't get over that whole "I'm more of a baker" thing in the middle. She said she likes to bake pies but then kind of indicates that perhaps baking is limited to cakes which would make a person wonder if she is trying to grill her pumpkin pies. Perhaps she is trying to use a real pumpkin left from Halloween. What is there to master about making a pumpkin pie except to not burn it? All you do is open a few damn cans, dump it into a pie crust and bake the thing. How can you not master that? Can you not figure out how to turn on the oven? What the numbers mean?

NY Post Blind Items

WHICH television newsman is said to be having an affair with his female executive producer? She's getting a divorce, but it's still a bit sticky .

WHICH gay Broadway director made the most of it when one of his principal actors left the show? He picked a handsome young replacement who's been seen having dinner with the older man .

WHICH television actress has more to deal with than her recent divorce? Spies have spotted her leaving AA meetings in Hollywood.

Today's Blind Items

Do you remember the A list film actor who was almost caught by his wife when he was spending time with his girlfriend at the family ski cabin? Well, it turns out that since that crazy incident, he and his wife have reached an agreement. Now our actor spends the week before Christmas with the girlfriend and the rest of the holidays with his wife and family. As for the rest of the year, it is pretty much about 50/50 also. This would shock the hell out of his fans.

Random Photos Part One - With Reader Photos

If you are going to send in a reader photo you need to do so before December 30th. If you don't you will have to wait until the next cycle in June.

So, since everyone enjoyed the Amy Winehouse photo so much from yesterday, I thought I would go ahead and include another of her. This time, still on vacation and also fully clothed at this point. It does seem as if she is interested in her new friend though.
I sure hope that cat is declawed or it could be very painful.
When I first saw the photo, I thought that Dustin Hoffman had mittens hanging from his coat.
I think Eva Longoria is telling Santa that she wants a career once Desperate Housewives ends.
The new poster from The Fast And The Furious
Gisele Bundchen can apparently ride a stationary bicycle drunk.
Well Hilary Duff has the duck walk down. Now, Tom Cruise just needs to divorce Katie Holmes.
These are baby Java Rhinos. Researchers found four babies of the most endangered species of rhino on the planet.
Samantha Ronson would probably rather be in the hospital than on another shopping trip with Lindsay Lohan.
This is Paula Abdul coming from seeing a movie. With my luck I would have sat right behind that guy. I love how they both are wearing sunglasses at night. Sing it with me people.
I didn't know Paris Hilton sold Mary Kay.
Reader Photo #1
And Reader Photo #2
You don't usually see people wearing long pants in the Caribbean. Apparently though Simon Cowell does.
Tracy Morgan wins the shiny jacket of the year contest.

Quick Hits

Here are some items I found interesting today, but just don't care enough about to muster up a full post about each.

Pete Wentz And Breast Milk - Apparently Pete decided he needed to share with the world, or at least the people who listen to SIRIUS program The Morning Mash Up that he has tasted Ashlee Simpson's breast milk. He thought it tasted "soury" and "weird." Yeah, but what did Joe Simpson have to say about it.

Speidi - After the AP busted The Hills and the Spencer Pratt/Heidi Montage fake wedding, someone wrote into the script that Spencer should just back out and give Heidi the real wedding she has always dreamed about. Of course that doesn't mean Spencer doesn't want to procreate immediately though. He says that he wants to have a kid ASAP. Since I don't think Heidi can have it before the season finale of next year's Hills season, they might have to fake that whole thing as well. Not that anything they ever do would be real anyway.

Michael Jackson - I still don't understand this story. Apparently some biographer of Michael Jackson said Michael needs a lung transplant or he's going to die. Michael's spokesperson Dr. Thome Thome (yeah, his parents loved him) said there is no truth to the rumors and then made some claim that Michael is going on tour and about to sign a huge deal with a huge entertainment company. Uh huh.

Twilight - Apparently the book and movie is now going to be a television show. Can you feel my enthusiasm?

Daily Mirror Blind Item

Which TV presenter is decidedly less popular with his over-worked behind-the-scenes colleagues? His constant bullying and screaming have earned him the nickname Mussolini...

Must Have Injected Botox In The Brain

This is what is has come down to. With no news in the gossip world I have resorted to writing about Sharon Stone and her attempt at attention. According to TMZ, some guy came to Sharon's house and said he was a delivery guy or making some kind of service call. She thought he was suspicious looking. What she probably didn't realize was that her regular botox guy was on vacation and so this guy was probably just filling in.

But to Sharon it looked probably like some headline grabbing time so she called the cops. Specifically she called the Beverly Hills cops. The problem is that Sharon does not live in Beverly Hills. She lives in Los Angeles. I'm sure she would all want us to believe she lives in Beverly Hills and maybe she feels that when you reach a certain level of celebrity status that you just automatically are entitled to call the Beverly Hills police department, but they didn't see it that way.

When the Beverly Hills police department told her she needed to call the LAPD, she never did. Here's the thing I find intriguing. If she was at her house and dialed 911 she would have got the LAPD. The fact that the Beverly Hills police department was called means that Sharon must have looked up their number in the phone book and called them on some general number. Guess it wasn't that big of an emergency.

More On The Model Who Fell To Her Death

So, yesterday in random photos I posted a photo (duh) of Miss Asia 2007 Sahar Daftary. I also wrote a little blurb about all I knew at the time. That she had fallen/pushed/jumped to her death after discovering her boyfriend was in fact married. Now, there is so much more.

Turns out that the model actually got married to her boyfriend. Yep. They got married despite the fact he was married. She had no idea or clue about the other wife or about the fact that the guy also just had a baby a few months prior to getting married to Sahar.

After Sahar found out about it, she moved out of the apartment the "married" couple shared. When she plunged/was pushed/fell to her death she was at the apartment to just get her stuff. Apparently the couple fought. Now, the police did arrest the boyfriend, but that was just for questioning purposes and he has not been charged with a crime...yet.

Sahar's family of course all wants revenge and to not rule the death as a suicide. If I were her family I would be out there ready to kick some ass. I also want to see photos of the woman the boyfriend was married to and to get her side of this whole thing.

Now, just to be fair and honest here and to show both sides. Sahar is not completely innocent in all of this. Apparently she made a sex tape with a guy who was not her boyfriend/husband even though at the time she thought she was married. The sex tape is somewhere online and there are reports that this is what caused the breakup and not the whole bigamy thing.

Here is the entire article and lots more photos from The Daily Mail.

What Do You Think?

The NY Post is adding fuel to the rumors that Jennifer Lopez and Marc Anthony are calling their marriage quits. I think I was the first to point out that Jennifer Lopez showed up at an event without her ring on and very much alone. I didn't have any information, so I am not trying to give myself a big pat on the back or anything. I just made an observation. Since then though, reporters have been digging and digging and have discovered that Marc Anthony doesn't wear his ring either. In addition to that, in the Post report, they claim that Jennifer sent her assistant on the road with Marc to report back to her if he cheated.

Wow. First of all if you think someone is cheating or going to cheat enough to send someone out on the road to watch him, than you know there must be some serious trust issues going on in that relationship. I wonder if she was worried that Marc would just give the assistant a few thousand dollars to shut the hell up or just end up having sex with the assistant.

Although I love the Post, I wonder about how accurate the story is. If it is true, than Jennifer must have told Marc that was the reason she was sending her assistant which means that he must have cheated on Jennifer in the past. I doubt he would really go for the idea otherwise. The second reason why I think this is dubious is that can you imagine Jennifer going through her daily routine without someone there to kiss her ass all day and tell her how great she is? Yeah, me either. I think the marriage is about over. What do you think?

Download Music To Your Heart's Content

Knowing they were ultimately going to lose the fight, the RIAA has announced they will no longer sue anyone who is caught illegally downloading music from the internet. Instead they will focus on new technology to make it impossible to download music illegally. Good luck with that. Instead of suing everyone and trying to justify the huge damage awards they had got written into law, they will instead warn internet service providers that someone is illegally downloading music and hope the internet service provider will pass along the warning and then if you continue will try and have your service turned off. At that point of course you will simply find a new internet service provider so that doesn't really seem to be in the ISP's interest.

So, if you have been meaning to download that Alvin And The Chipmunks holiday album illegally but were afraid of having your neighbors find out about when you were sued, go ahead and do it.

Paris Hilton Is Now Doing The Cover Yourself Dance - Or Is It US Weekly Being Lazy

In case you are unfamiliar with the cover yourself dance, it is something politicians do on a regular basis. They spin a bunch of stories that are very similar, but not exactly the same from a variety of sources and try to give themselves some wiggle room down the road by saying they didn't know where the story came from. It is also used by guys when they change clothes before coming home from a strip club.

Yesterday I posted that, the Los Angeles Times reported Paris Hilton's front door was unlocked at the time of the burglary at her home. Yes, the Times makes mistakes, but I'm pretty sure they are more reliable than US Magazine when it comes to having sources in the police department.

But maybe Us Weekly's source is not in the police department. I want you to read something. In my never ending quest to work my big fat butt off for you, I found this.

The first is a quote from Paris Hilton to E! News yesterday.

"I think whoever did this definitely has been there before. We have some suspects that I'm thinking of. I'm missing jewellery, watches, every ring I own. All my necklaces, jewellery that my grandmothers gave me that I'll never be able to replace.

You know, it's just an invasion of privacy and it's happened to me before. It's really scary but they're doing a huge investigation on this and we're going to catch this person."

OK, did you read it carefully. Read it again to just be sure. Remember it is straight from the mouth of Paris Hilton and it is interesting how she keeps referring to herself and the police as we as opposed to just saying the police are going to catch the person. It almost sounds like Paris is out there in her heels with her wonky eye as her superpower. The only thing that can stop her is when she runs out of Valtrex.

Sorry for the distraction. OK. The next quote is from an unnamed source that US Weekly found who disputes the LA Times' assertion about the unlocked front door. Yeah, right. But read the rest of the quote and see if it sounds familiar.

"All of Paris' diamonds, necklaces, rings, watches, old family heirlooms from her grandmothers was stolen. They have the thief caught on tape since she has surveillance cameras set up in every room in her home. In the tapes the thief knows exactly where to go, almost like he's been there before. Detectives are doing a big investigation and will catch this person."

I think there are two options to as who US Weekly's source is. I think we would ll agree that we can eliminate anyone with any intelligence whatsoever, as well as any professional publicist. My guess is that the source for the report is Paris herself with a little creative editing by US. I doubt Paris or any of her friends would use the word heirloom in a sentence. I love the last line. Paris said huge and her "friend" said big investigation. Since it is almost word for word, it was either Paris who said it or US just got really lazy and took the quote while watching E! and edited it and gave it a source. The fact that the source was the person who watched E! is irrelevant.

The reason I am leaning towards US just using the E! broadcast as their source is the line about the grandmothers. Paris is obviously referring to both her grandmothers. US Weekly's source though thinks it is just one grandmother or they would have used the word were instead of was. The person watching E! over at US must have been in a hurry and just assumed Paris only had one grandmother who loved her and gave her things.

NY Daily News Blind Item

What red-hot TV starlet is an in-the-closet lady lover?

Today's Blind Items - With A Kindness

#1 - This kindness is not anything spectacular, but since it happened this morning, I thought I would share it. B-/C+ television actor with about six years on the same crime show. Also one of my all-time favorite characters from one of the biggest films of all time. Anyway, our actor was in line at LAX this morning at the ticket counter with about 100 "everyday people" in front of him. People in line were asking for photographs and getting autographs and so a ticket agent asked our actor if he wanted to be moved to the front of the line. Our actor said, "Why?" The ticket agent said they had a special policy for celebrities which caused our actor to say, "Let me know when you see one."

#2 - Speaking of airports and airplanes. Well not speaking really because I am writing. It seems that this former B+ 80's actor and now known for indies and his best friend was on an airplane this weekend and forgot to lock the bathroom door on the plane. Word of advice. If you are going to defile the plane by doing a #2, your fellow passengers would probably at least not like to open the door and see you do it. The woman in her 20's who happened to open the door didn't know who the actor was and just said sorry. When our actor emerged he was just as embarrassed as the woman.

Random Photos Part One - With Reader Photos

Robert Mulligan - RIP
Everyone keeps saying Britney had the comeback of the year, but I have to give it to Lily Allen. She realized on her own she was making an ass out of herself and did something about it. If you look at her transformation from January-December it is pretty incredible. The reason I give her the edge is that she has done it on her own. If Britney was left to her own devices, I'm not sure she could do it. Plus, Lily looks smoking here. No, not the cigarettes, but just her whole look.
Love him or hate him, Adrian Grenier does a charity event about two or three times a month and you just have to admire that about the guy.
Tied with Verne Troyer or is Verne still on top for I'm going to be sick photo of the year?
Two things. I can't remember the last time I saw Christina Aguilera without her wig or extensions. Also, note to Christina. Umm. While you seems to change clothes several times daily, your husband has worn that Mickey Mouse shirt about 10 times in the past month. Now, I know Jordan is just like most guys who wear one shirt repeatedly. I do it as well. The difference is that I don't have my photo in the tabloids everyday. So, please get him a new shirt.
A first time appearance for Chase Johnson who immediately has moved into a tie with Billy Bob Thornton for skinniest dude in Hollywood.
"So, then Charles said, "he who smelt it, dealt it."
So, what's the point of the writing on Gavin Rossdale's leg? It is hard for anyone to read. Although I'm sure he would love to hear, "hey can you adjust your d**k, I can't read all the writing.
Hugh Jackman. I know. I got nothing. He has been in too many times lately.
Josh Hartnett on his last night doing Rain Man. Well not actually doing him because they are brothers and that would be wrong.
Jeffrey Osborne - Atlanta
Jordin Sparks - Perth
I love Kristen Scott Thomas.
Madness - London
I can't believe there is not video of this somewhere on YouTube. I just know Mary Kate Olsen must have fell at some point and I want to see it.
Oasis - New York
Glad Portia and Ellen got over whatever hump they were having. They look great together.
Reader Photo #1
And Reader Photo #2 &3
Robert Pattinson looks completely different. Glad to see him with the haircut. I was really getting tired of the Edward Cullen look.
I want to know at what point you just say to yourself, screw it, I'm going to go completely fake.
This is Sahar Daftary. Most of you won't know who she is, but she won the Face Of Asia competition. She killed herself over the weekend when she found out her boyfriend was married. She did so by jumping off a ten story balcony. The boyfriend was in the apartment they shared when she did it. I know, I know. Married and living with two women in two different places. I want to know why he didn't try and stop her from jumping.
Is Vanessa Hudgens doing the middle finger thing on purpose or by accident.
Whitesnake - Tilburg, Netherlands

Daily Mirror Blind Item

Which pin-up pop star has an embarrassing snoring problem?

His elephantine grunting is making a relationship impossible - and even his one-night stands are disappearing fast...

Ewwwww!! - Brent Bolthouse And Eliza Dushku

The Ewwwww!! part of the headline was the first word of a text I got over the weekend. Apparently the person who sent it found it quite disgusting that while on the set of Dollhouse that Eliza Dushku and Brent Bolthouse were making out. And when I say making out, I mean kind of similar to the Rachel Dratch/Jimmy Fallon making out on SNL. I asked if it was the Brent Bolthouse who does the radio show with Danny Masterson every week and owns Hyde and they said, "I don't know." They knew Brent from his two episodes of The Hills. Aaaah. Well I had never even seen a photo of him, so of course had to Google him to see who Eliza found so attractive that she had Production Assistants groaning at the pain and misery of watching the couple have at it in a wet slobbery, groping kind of way.

Hey, she works a lot. Maybe it was the only time the two could get together. At least they were making out and not just sitting next to each other holding hands when the cameras turned their way. If you don't get that last line, read the entire site today. I'm sure someone has written about them as a couple before but I didn't find anything. Of course I didn't look very hard because although I find it humorous that the crew found the affection a little overwhelming, I just am not that interested in who either of them is dating. But for you Hills fans, this might mean something to you, so I'm posting it.

The Butler Did It

I don't really care that someone made off with $2M worth of jewelry from Paris Hilton's house. I mean it is interesting that she tends to get robbed more than any celebrity ever, but I just can't work myself up into a post writing frenzy about it. Oh sure, I'm writing one now but that is because I wanted to tell the burglar to make sure you wash your hands before handling the jewelry and also that we live in a very sad world when Paris Hilton can afford $2M in jewels. Hell, she probably has them insured for $5M so she is probably thinking to herself that she doesn't have to host as many parties next year.

The reason I wrote about the heist besides warning the robber to adhere to safe hygienic practices is that I think Paris and the burglar know each other. According to the police report, someone broken in at 5am. Paris wasn't home, but I believe she was in town. So, this person knew that. 5am is a time when "everyday people" can wake up so you have to know she is not going to be there. Plus, she has 14 million dogs. Sure, they probably don't like Paris anymore than the rest of us, but their barking would have woken her up. Third, the front door was unlocked. I mean either this is the most lucky burglar in the history of the world or they knew the door would be unlocked. Oh, and if I am the insurance company I am going to make Paris' life miserable because she did leave the door unlocked. Finally, Paris has a security camera but the burglar wore a hooded sweatshirt and kept his face away from the camera.

When they catch this person, it is going to be very interesting to see who it is. I just hope they go over to Joe Francis' house and give him what the last Paris burglar gave him.

They Held Hands!!!

I can practically feel the collective orgasm over at US Weekly. They ran a story this morning about Reese Witherspoon and Jake Gyllenhaal celebrating Jake's birthday Friday night. All they could come up with was the pair ate some food and drank some wine and then they had this line.

"As for PDA? The couple held hands at the table!"

Holy F**k? Are you serious? Well that means they must be getting married. I mean no one holds hands at the dinner table unless they are getting married. I am giving you the link to the photo. It is from Flynet, and although they are wonderful people I don't really want to get into a lengthy discourse with them about Fair Use today, so I would just prefer, if you click, then look at the picture and come back.

OK, have you looked at it? Seriously. Go look. OK, I think you just have to love how they are both sitting next to each other so both can have their faces seen by cameras. Also, have you seen a couple sit next to each other and look more far apart? Ever? They also look thrilled with each other's company. Yes, it is one moment in time, but Reese looks absolutely bored out of her mind, while Jake seems enthralled with whatever has caught his eye. Reese is thinking about all the wrapping she has to do for Christmas still and Jake is checking out the ass on the busboy.

But they held hands!!! That has to be worth a few cover stories about engagement and weddings and baby plans and whatever else they can think of..

Yay For Mercury

You would think the headline would be a post about Mercury, the forgotten planet. Well I guess that really isn't fair because at least it is still a planet. Poor Pluto out there is now just a big ass rock. I guess scientists really don't have any feelings. Didn't they read The Alchemist? Pluto has feelings just like the rest of us.

Anyway, it turns out that the other two members of the play in which Jeremy Piven was starring before his sushi obsession brought him down are overjoyed that he is gone. Makes me wonder if someone wasn't a little too hands with the dropping of mercury into that half caf-mocha grande soy latte of Piven's. Not content to just bad mouth Piven to the press, both Raul Esparza and Elizabeth Moss took pot shots at Piven after the curtain call yesterday in front of the audience.

"I’m sure you’ve read the headlines about the silliness in our show. Today was the first time I really enjoyed playing this show. I hope you weren’t expecting a big TV star.”

Nice. You don't see that kind of hatred except when you celebrate Christmas at the Sheen house.

Well He Needs His Rest - Planning The 19th Kid

So, I decided to do a little followup to that Duggar family piece from a few weeks ago. Since my post a few weeks ago Michelle Duggar gave birth to their 18th child and has already got pregnant with twins, delivered those and Jim Bob hopes to have her pregnant again by the end of the week. Needless to say it has been a busy few weeks at the Duggar house.

Seriously though, the Duggar's were on the Today Show today. Funny how that works. Your try typing today a couple of times a in a row like that and you feel like you said something wrong. Today on Today. Yeah. Anyway, apparently dad says the four day old baby is already sleeping through the night. Michelle said it was Jim Bob who was sleeping through the night and mom who was awake. Wow, a little fight. Interesting. I did see in a print interview though they are definitely having another kid after this one.

I also note that now that the Duggar's are celebrities they have decided that they are allowed to also name their baby whatever in the hell they want to and think they can get away with it. Their daughter's name is Jordyn-Grace Makiya Duggar which makes use of a hyphen and an extra middle name which no one can pronounce. You know it won't matter anyway because everyone probably just will call her 18. See, that way you can give everyone like a jersey with a number on the back and the front. Sounds like a good way to keep track of who is whom and also not to tick anyone off if you can't remember their name. Now who in the hell got lucky #7.

Visit msnbc.com for Breaking News, World News, and News about the Economy

Maybe Her Finger Got Tired

In the first time in probably the recorded history of the planet, a DJ was admitted to the hospital for exhaustion. Now, I'm not talking about a DJ who works a four hour shift on the air and then because they have a radio station with no budget also have to do 18 other things before or after their shift, make appearances, and generally be a nice person wherever they go so as to not offend any member of the listening public who has a ratings book. They work hard, and usually for not much money and very little job security.

No, I'm talking about Samantha Ronson. You know. She of the standing up for a couple of hours chatting with Lindsay while she puts on different records and mishes and mashes. She then can go home and sleep for 20 hours. Yet, somehow Samantha had to be admitted to the hospital for exhaustion. She said it was "travel and working." I think it is probably Lindsay Lohan. Think about it. Can you imagine having Lindsay jabbering in your ear 24 hours a day. Lindsay does not ever shut the hell up. Lindsay talks and talks and talks and none of it has any relevance about anything. If Lindsay is doing coke, it sounds like Alvin and The Chipmunks sped up about ten times normal speed but it never shuts up. If I was Samantha I would have cracked up a long time ago. The combination of Lindsay yapping 24 hours a day and her having no career and being forced to follow Samantha while Sam works and Lindsay does, well, nothing, must have been grating on Sam.

Get better Sam, and stop plugging everyone in your blog posts. It kind of defeats the point of sympathy when you are shilling for free food and a gig for you or Lindsay.

But It's Ron Jeremy

Ron Jeremy was allegedly attacked by a pap while eating dinner over at Mel's Diner. No, not the Mel's Diner from Alice which really should have been called Alice's Restaurant, but a different one. Ron was eating one of his six hamburgers. What can I say? The guy can eat and I think he learned a very long time ago that the porn industry was not hiring him for his good looks. The pap in question walked up to Ron and allegedly pepper sprayed Ron in the face. I say allegedly because of course the guy could very well be innocent. I mean it could have been water that he sprayed which made Ron cry like that or it could have not been anything at all and Ron just happened to have a can of pepper spray in his pocket.

Seeing that he had the chance to get a pap sent to prison, at the exact same moment that the pap brought up the can to allegedly spray, Ron threw down his burger, reached in his pocket, and sprayed his own face. He had been practicing this moment for years and it finally paid off. All the years of training and this was his moment. The pap never had a chance. The cops came and the pap was arrested for criminal use of tear gas.

I'm guessing what really happened is this pap guy auditioned for a porn shoot, and didn't get hired. So, he pulled a Tonya Harding. He was hoping that perhaps Ron would be so disfigured that the pap would get the role. Again, Ron is not hired for his looks Mr. Pap Guy.

NY Daily News Blind Item

Which Oscar-winning actress always must be a drain on hotel maids? The now-taken beauty always asked her former flames to perform a golden shower during romantic interludes, and we hear she had a few takers.