Monday, March 30, 2009

Angelina Jolie Could Just Buy Octo-Mom's Kids


Star Magazine is reporting this week that Angelina Jolie is considering giving money to Nadya Suleman. Yeah, and I'm considering cutting back to five meals a day. Just because I'm considering it doesn't mean I am going to actually do it. I hate articles that say someone is considering doing something or might be doing something. None of it has an ounce of truth in it. It is just a magazine that didn't have enough news to make up an entire issue and since they probably had Jennifer Aniston considering getting pregnant or adopting a baby last week, they had to have some celebrity considering something different this week.

Would Angelina give money to Octo-Mom? Who knows. Nadya will let us know if she ever does though, because she will probably have it copied, framed and then tattooed on her body. Angelina, her hero giving her money. I think what Angelina should do is just buy the babies off Octo-Mom. Just make her one big offer and add them to her brood. 14 + 6 = 20. That should keep Angelina happy for a year or two, and Nadya would have the money to get some more IVF treatments and start the whole process again.

Do you think Brad and Angelina could handle 20 kids? They would have to lease a larger plane and hire a few nannies, but other than that, the only thing that would change much is learning new names and just having a once a month birthday celebration rather than celebrating birthday's individually. You know, have one of the nannies run down to Baskin Robbins and get an ice cream cake, and everyone can sing a half hearted happy birthday to whatever kids are a year older. Yes, I know the octuplets were all born on the same day, but if you spread them out evenly over the course of one per month for eight months they will probably feel at least a little more appreciated.

The way it stands now, Nadya will probably give them a joint card and take herself out for some spa treatments because it was after all, she who gave birth to them. Yeah, I bet she thinks that way.

13 comments:

Lizzie said...

I'm getting pre-tty tired of the whole baby momma experience. I live in a house where sixteen children were born, fifteen of which lived, grew up and married from here. Nobody made a big deal about it then. These days, it's like earth mother Ange et al invented frickin' childbirth and mothering. I'll be glad when the baby collecting fad passes and they go back to being shallow wombless vessels. lol

Mooshki said...

Ugh, it's true. Octomom will make the kids spend their birthdays making up to her for the pain and suffering they caused her.

lutefisk said...

I don't know if Angelina has enough arm space left to tattoo 14 more birth coordinates.

Mooshki said...

Good point, Lutefisk - she might have to actually eat something to make herself big enough to hold 'em all.

Cheryl said...

It's like these celebrity moms want a big pat on the back for being mothers. Lots of us Gen Xers gave up careers to stay home and raise kids and live on one salary without nannies. (please no mommy wars with stay at home moms vs. career moms. I'm not a hater.)

Catherine said...

she looks like the bride of Frankenstien here.

Elizabeth T. said...

I don't know why everyone acts like Angelina is the first person to adopt kids or have a lot of them. Plus she employs like 14 nannies. If they were going to go to someone else I would want it to be some nice couple who won't force the kids to travel thousands of miles everyday. Anyone but one of these publicity whores.

selenakyle said...

I'll go with my usual for $300, Alex...

Bleeeeeccchhhh.

Goodgrief said...

Brad and Angie could buy Candy Spelling's house and then go buy Octocrazy's 14 kids. I think a house over 56000sqft would accommodate 22 people rather nicely. That's over 2500 sqft per person. As for the coordinates, she could put them on a leg. Having 20 kids would probably put the kabosh on globe trotting. Just a thought Angie, are you reading this?

ardleigh said...

Heck think of all the PR that would bring brangelina. Heck they'd have to just get their own mag. With 20 kids you could almost never see one on the cover of a mag 2x's in 2yrs. Octocrazy would agree if she got to meet Angie and then Angie could just diss her to.
Sounds like a win-win to me.

shakey said...

Ha, Ent - you know my mother?

Diana said...

What they (the Jolie Pitts) have done with adoption is no big deal in the 'real people' world- but it is a big deal because they are celebrities and people watch everything they do.

Yes, they travel and I hope travel with help. I remember my first big road trip with my one infant son (at the time) and, boy, was I glad I had my Mom along!! So if you can afford a nanny to help :-) (If I could have afforded or justified the expense I would have tried it - a real helper- just for the extra set of hands. Yes, I work more than full time - I WISH I could have stayed home but with our circumstances it would not work.)

So, I guess what I'm rambling on about (sorry) is that all of the kids in the Brange family appear to be healthy, happy, and pretty well adjusted. The parents seem to take turns working (wish I could have 'taken turns'!!)

I only hope that the "octoplus" family (can't forget the other kids) have a halfway decent life - that mom does NOT give me a good feeling. I truly wish there was a good family who could swoop all eight of them up and keep them together, healthy and happy. It'll be quite a task for someone emotionally and financially fit-- but there are many out there who are able.

I have a friend, my age, with seven kids. None are multiples. Happy, beautiful family. They take care of themselves. They just wanted a large family and they made it work, and are doing a darned fine job of it. They drive a Club Van for trips and load the luggage on the top of the van. Kid one stands on the roof - Dad tosses the bags up, they tie them down and make it work. Hard to imagine HOW they do it, but they do. Together.

Well, talked too much, but if she (the one who gave birth) was going to have a litter she should have been ready. She needs to get away from the TV - who has time for TV with one infant much less 8 plus six more kids? Garbage. Agree - it is all about her in her small polluted perverted mind. Someone needs to watch out for the welfare of those babies.

I'm hoping when things quiet down she allows them all to be taken off together to a good home to be brought up together in an environment where they are loved and left alone to be kids.

Judi said...

And you, Enty, needed something to fill space in today's column? Please. None of this is even worth thinking about.