Thursday, December 16, 2010

Kevin Spacey Talks About His Sex Life


In an interview with The Daily Beast, (via New York Magazine)the interviewer went flat out and asked Kevin Spacey about his sexuality. The reporter offered to put the questions off the record, but Kevin agreed to stay on the record. It is an interesting exchange where you get the feeling that Kevin admits to being gay, but strongly feels that he wants it kept private. Maybe I am just reading too much into it. Apparently the whole thing was very civilized. No yelling or screaming or anything.

May I talk to you man-to-man? We can go off the record for this if you want.

You're conducting this interview so you can stay on the record if you wish. I don't mind.

Okay, but at any point you want to go off-the-record let me know ... We gay men have always proudly claimed you as a member of our tribe, and yet you don't proudly claim us back. Why?

Look, I might have lived in England for the last several years but I'm still an American citizen and I have not given up my right to privacy.

But that's where we differ. I don't think being gay is a private matter. Heterosexuals don't consider their heterosexuality itself a private matter. I'm not asking you what goes on behind a locked door anymore than I would ask a heterosexual. I'm not asking if you're a top or bottom. That's none of my business.

..People have different reasons for the way they live their lives. You cannot put everyone's reasons in the same box. It's just a line I've never crossed and never will.

...I stopped being an actor after I left Juilliard because I couldn't live a lie to enable myself to pretend. That was too much of a double whammy.

I don't live a lie. You have to understand that people who choose not to discuss their personal lives are not living a lie. That is a presumption that people jump to.

There are lies of omission. But I have never heard that you are at all hypocritical in your daily life with your close friends and family...But you've been great to keep this all on the record. I appreciate that. That speaks to your innate integrity.

Look, at the end of the day people have to respect people's differences. I am different than some people would like me to be. I just don't buy into that the personal can be political. I just think that's horseshit. No one's personal life is in the public interest. It's gossip, bottom line. End of story...

I encourage you to read the rest of the interview on The Daily Beast because Kevin discusses bullying and does it in a very eloquent way.

37 comments:

sunnyside1213 said...

Well said Kevin.

bits of moxy said...

I adore him so. He always seems so calm and collected. I wish there wasn't the park incident though.

I am not going to lie, it is sometimes interesting to get a truth nugget of "is he/she gay?" In a society that mostly accepts with open arms regardless either way. Why is it even brought up at all?

Jackie said...

I agree with Kevin. You don't see actors/musician/celebrities on the cover of magazine pronoucing that they are straight. It's really nobody's business, especially since it doesn't matter one way or the other in their line of work.

MISCH said...

I'm with you Kevin..

Cheryl said...

I get what he's saying. Just because you don't talk publicly about your sexuality doesn't mean that you aren't open in your private life. I definitely respect that.

von said...

I agree with everyone else, I don't think he needs to openly proclaim it to the public at large. Its a good interview.

Err said...

I like him even more for that interview.

Seachica said...

I hate when people assume that every gay man has to publicly yell that he's gay. I don't yell out loud that I'm straight - frankly, I just don't talk about it alot. Just as long as you're not publicly gay bashing, who cares if you're gay or straight?

nancer said...

there are celebs who keep their private lives strictly off limits, which is a good thing, IMO.

thing is, if he revealed one thing---like who he's dating/lives with---the whole cat is out of the bag. then the fact that he's GAY becomes the focus and is all anyone talks or cares about. it's not like that for straight people.

this is why i think he keeps all of it private, and it's certainly his right to do so.

sunnyside1213 said...

"I wish there wasn't the park incident though."

What park incident???

RocketQueen said...

Wow, well said, Kevin. Such unapologetic dignity. And such a terrific actor. I think my favourites are American Beauty, The Life of David Gale and GlenGarry Glen Ross.

BigMama said...

I think the interviewer was a little annoying but Kevin S. handled it very well. He should give lessons to other celebs closeted or not.

__-__=__ said...

Yes, well said. K-Pax was good too, a sweet story. Do you think that in our lifetime people will stop worrying so much about if someone is gay or straight as long as they are not bashing? I do wish it would end.

MontanaMarriott said...

He should have asked him about his alleged passes at straight masseurs at ritzy spa's throughout LA. Which would add to the reason he moved to London, he got tired of being banned from everywhere lol

Sue Ellen Mishkey said...

Personally, I think it's good when people come out so that it might, one day, become so mainstream that is no longer an asked question. However, I do understand his reasoning behind it and can't disagree.

Aly said...

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USUAL SUSPECTS............brilliant
USUAL SUSPECTS............brilliant
USUAL SUSPECTS............brilliant
USUAL SUSPECTS............brilliant
USUAL SUSPECTS............brilliant
USUAL SUSPECTS............brilliant
USUAL SUSPECTS............brilliant
USUAL SUSPECTS............brilliant
USUAL SUSPECTS............brilliant
USUAL SUSPECTS............brilliant
USUAL SUSPECTS............brilliant

bits of moxy said...

@Sunnyside
In 2004 while in London he claimed to have been mugged in a park while walking his dog. It was much rumored he was trolling for a good time. Later he came clean about it.

http://articles.cnn.com/2004-04-19/entertainment/spacey.london_1_police-station-london-s-old-vic-mobile-phone?_s=PM:SHOWBIZ

jess said...

Great answers, I like when he implies that is his personal life not of public interest, not everything is of public interest. Good interview from a talented clear headed actor.

Audrey said...

I agree with Sue Ellen, but it is his life. And I know from personal experience that he is completely flaming.

Anonymous said...

LOL@Aly

That was a great movie. I bought the DVD because of that.

nunaurbiz said...

I don't think he admitted to it either way. It sounds consistent with what he's said all along. saying that he's "different than some people would like me to be" just might mean that he's NOT gay but that the gays claim him. I love love love Kevin Spacey. He's a brilliant actor and he's so smart. Definitely on my all-time Top 10 people to have at a dinner party. I don't care if he's gay or not though I suspect he swings both ways. I love how he's kept his sex life private.

Anonymous said...

Leave Kevin Spacey ALOOOOOONE!

P.S. Whatever became of the Leave Britney Spears Alone guy?

RocketQueen said...

@Aly - my bad!! How could I forget the Usual Suspects?!

Missy said...

This guy has always creeped me out. There`s something unsavory about him.

Amartel said...

Amen, Kevin Spacey. So be it and well said. Far too many people presume that they have the right to answers about other people's sexuality, usually in the name of the Great Gay Cause. Well, that's just pure self-serving sanctimony. No shy lesbians or wallflower gays are going to suddenly come bursting out of the closet just because some movie star has been finally hounded into talking about his sexuality. Stop kidding yourself. You can ask, but you're not entitled to an answer, nor are you entitled to be asked back for more prying. Also, calling such people "closeted" is insulting. Try "dignified." Because maybe a gay man or lesbian doesn't want to be "that gay guy from The Usual Suspects," or whatever, maybe he doesn't want to be defined by his sexuality as opposed to his talent.

jax said...

totally gay and totally private.
well said of him.

Miss X said...

I'll believe it when I see it. They may be "separated" but I don't expect any sort of announcement anytime soon. (Hoping I'm wrong).

Barton Fink said...

Gosh, this is a tough one. I think that because homosexuality is technically illegal in many parts of the world and gay people throughout the United States face employment discrimination at a variety of places (schools and the military come to mind, but corporate America too), it is still something that people should be able to avoid speaking about if they desire to avoid speaking about it. That said, I don't like Kevin Spacey much. He's made some good movies, but he's made a lot of movies that just bore me.

Mari said...

I love this man, he is a fantastic talent, and beyond that, the work he has done to preserve and revitalize live theatre while introducing children to the arts is so much more than a lot of the public know, and a gift for culture in the future. I thought his interview was wonderful as well. We live in a world where we are either expected to answer questions about our finance, sex lives, political beliefs and religion, or are told to be paranoid and keep silent since the government and corporations are spying on you. I truly don't think either way is healthy, and I admire the way some people, like Kevin are pleasant, polite and serious, and they stick to their guns. I also adore 'we're here, we're queer' gusto. That makes me happy too.
People should be free to be who they are, no matter who that is.

I also LOVE "Beyond the Sea" and the soundtrack is awesome!

mooshki said...

I always think of his line in 'Midnight in the Garden of Good and Evil': "I rather prefer not knowing." I think that sums up his feelings on the subject. Talking about stars' sex lives, gay or straight, affects how we see them in movies. I often wish I didn't read so much gossip, so I could enjoy Gwyneth Paltrow and Ashley Judd in movies the way I used to!

KellyLynn said...

I've always thought he was a classy guy. It's too bad more stars don't take the same stance. But, then again, there aren't too many stars who can stand on the merits of their acting talent alone. Most of the stars who whore out their personal lives don't even have their acting talent to stand on.

Just sayin'.

kathrynnova said...

the interviewer is a bit aggressive. kevin is extremely dignified. he reminds me a bit of dirk bogarde regarding all of this. he didn't hide or lie, but felt that he had his right to privacy.

i really respect kevin. always did. he's amazing and one of my absolute favorite actors.

Pookie said...

well said. idc if he's gay, straight, or martian.

keep bringing me good movies.

xoApril said...

I don't see this as a confession. I think he is keeping his personal life off limits completely and isn't scared that people will assume that privacy means closeted homosexuality.

Meg said...

@kathrynnova - I agree!

I thought the interviewer was a bit of an ass.

Bethan said...

don't you think it's ironic.. all of these people on a gossip/blinds site saying 'well said Kevin'.

Tiredallthetime said...

This is a really weird blind to read knowing what we know now. 😕

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