Friday, January 27, 2012

Ted C Blind Item

Meet Soheila Stuff-It. She probably won't remember meeting you, but what difference does it really make?

‘Cause that's the way Soheila likes it—drugged up halfway to Brigadoon to escape the burdens of being the downtrodden diva that she is. And when she's not partaking in a dabble of this or a hit of that, you'll likely find her drowning at the bottom of a bottle.

It's all terribly, terribly sad. Which is why Ms. Stuff-It's peeps are desperate to get the star into treatment stat. To which the always stubborn Soheila says:

Hell, no!

See, Soheila hasn't exactly had an easy go of it lately (despite the fact that she has the most gorgeous hair!).

But instead of trying to get better or, ya know, even just talking about her issues, S2 prefers to handle things her own way. And a trip to rehab is so not on her To Do list anytime soon. Or ever, if Soheila has anything to say about it.

Which, actually, she does.

See, Ms. Stuff-It isn't a pushover. In fact, she's made a name for herself in this town by being a tough chick who doesn't back down.

Which is why we're so sad to see her destroying herself…again.

That's the other terribly, horribly sad thing about all this. This isn't the first time Soheila has spiraled. It's all happened before and even though she slapped a smile back on her face and chitchatted about how fab she was feeling, underneath Soheila was the same damaged, messed up broad she was before.

To which we say: Hey, Soheila, relapse happens. Heck, it's practically expected. But it's time you give up your pride—and partying—and straighten yourself out.

We have far more faith in you than, say, Morgan Mayhem or Mimi Kitten. And we just hate seeing you be so blasé about your life, babe.

Oh, and if you stop hooking up with bisexual men, Soheila, that too just might lead you on the way to recovery, just a suggestion!

AND IT AIN'T: Angelina Jolie, Kim Richards, Mischa Barton

60 comments:

JoElla said...

I'll Take Demi for 200 Alex.

Laura said...

Demi(s) - either one of them.

Manda_kitty said...

Sounds like Demi, but she is in rehab sooo...

SkittleKitty said...

Carrie Fisher? Hope not, but the bisexual men thing kinda fits...

amh.producer said...

I'd say Heather Locklear since I thought she said no to rehab but I just don't think she fits...

Employee News Week 3 said...

heather of course

sunshine said...

what JoElla said...

RenoBlondee said...

Demi M. Didn't Ted say before she was only a costar BV previously, so that would make her ripe for the pickin'.

Love is the Movement said...

Heather - she does the hair colour commercials.

ParkerNosey said...

For some odd reason I read Mariah Carey in this. Especially with the hair comment. Even though it's extentions, her commercials with the hair flying popped in my head. But the blind didn't mention her family. . . Back to the drawing board.

Aimée said...

I thought Kirsten Dunst fit, but either of the Demi's work too.

shelly said...

First time poster- long time lurker. What about Kelly Osborne? She had that ex-fiancé that was bi; and her hair has been recently dyed....

Mother Campfire said...

This isn't blind.

And bitch DOES have great hair.

Mother Campfire said...

ps. The reason I think its Demi over HL is that he mentions 'partying' where HL only drank alone...at a bar or home. Either way, she didn't 'party'. Demi, however, has been 'partying'.

pomme said...

Kelly Osborne? (great hair and bisexual ex-boyfriend)

Laura said...

Kelly is a good guess but her hair is really bad.

rajackson0 said...

Rihanna is my guess

RenoBlondee said...

I'd argue that Demi M is more of a "tough chick that doesn't back down" and "no pushover" then Demi L or any of the other guesses too.

Cheryl said...

The bisexual can't be a real clue because Ted thinks everyone is either gay or bi.

Sylvia said...

I thought it was Demi right away.

So regarding the bi-sexual men does that mean Azzton and Bruce are???

RJ said...

I like Skittle Kitty's guess of Carrie Fisher. Well, actually, I DON'T like it, because I love Fisher and don't want her to be relapsing. The clues fit. Especially the bisexual men and the "chitchatted about how fab she was feeling". She's written more than one memoir and promoted them on tons of talk shows. She was on Craig Ferguson earlier this month and seemed extra, super-duper hyper. My husband even made the comment "I thought she quit doing coke." She might have also felt extra pressure to shed pounds quickly since she's a Jenny Craig spokesperson. Plus, I'd think she was a lot more of a "tough chick who doesn't back down" than Demi would ever be. The "great hair" reference could be about her very famous Princess Leia hairdo. I think Ted's releasing this now so everyone will think it's Demi. I just don't think any of the clues fit as well for Demi except the partying.

EmEyeKay said...

Does Heather have a history with bisexual men?

Heather did the hair color ads, Demi has beautiful hair. All the AIAs are younger than Demi, tho. Both of them have been sober and have been to rehab, right? Not so sure if Heather has been sober for long, but she's been to rehab, I know Demi was sober for years and years.

Mark B said...

Kelly Osbourne makes sense. The hair thing reminded me of Avril Lavigne though (are there any rumours about Brody Jenner's sexuality?)

Mary Stewart-McGovern said...

I'm thinking it's Heather, as well. Plus, "Heather on the Hill" is a popular song from Brigadoon (which Ted references.)

Carrie L. said...

It sounds a lot like Heather to me, too, especially with the hair. Finally, a Ted blind that makes sense!

califblondy said...

No, not Carrie, I won't hear of it! Plus, she has crappy hair, even with the Cinabons, it was crappy.

I'm going with Demi and this is Ted's way at saying I told you so or I knew it all along.

RocketQueen said...

Kelly Osbourne ftw

anita_mark said...

Heather always had those awful roots. I could never figure out why someone who was rich and had handlers, etc would have such bad roots.

Demi has gorgeous hair. The other, young Demi hasn't made a name for herself.

The And It Aint's are really across the board.

yodelay said...

Lady gaga?

MadLyb said...

Heather Locklear.

SueRH said...

Heather.

Lohan said...

This is Rihanna, a magazine ran picture of her dirty house and claimed that it was a result of her crazy lifestyle. She just got that “thug life” tattoo..hence the whole “tough chick”. Also, sorry to say, but “slapped/damaged” sound like Chris Brown references to me.

Bitchette said...

Demi Lovato, for sure.

Kinda OT: Who's Mimi Kitten? I know how Morgan is.

Cathy said...

You guys, this is Ted's way of confirming that Mimi Kitten is Demi Moore, as it's long been suspected. Not sure about Soheila though, but I like the Heather guess.

crila16 said...

Soheila...I'm going to have to agree with the Heather guess. It's true she does Clairol commercials.

BTW...I personlly think Amanda Seyfried has the best hair in hollywood.

crazy/beautiful said...

All signs point to Rihanna, in my opinion.

Bnl1016 said...

Morgan Mayhem is Lohan.

And yes Mimi Kitten is Demi Moore so that's out.

I think Heather is a good fit. The only thing that bothers me about it is teh comment about how a trip to rehab is not on her to do list anytime soon. "or ever".

Ever to me means EVER. and she's already been to rehab.

bubbles said...

For those who think it's either Demi M or Heather, who is the bisexual man in question?

Jeri said...

How about Christina? She has pretty blond hair and she is a tuff b-tch. She's definitely spiraling.

krk67 said...

The Brigadoon thing (along with what others have said) points me to Kelly Osbourne.

Elizabeth said...

Kelly Osbourne already has a Ted C. blind from last year. She was doing drugs at Coachella. I forgot her moniker, but all the clues pointed to Kelly and a few months later Ted said Kelly had a blind

msgirl said...

Now that I've read all the comments, I go with Rihanna.

brendalove@gmail.com said...

Heather Locklear....bi-sexual guy is Jack Wagner

brendalove@gmail.com said...

Not Demi Moore because I don't think she has ever been to rehab. Not that we know of anyway

allisonwonderland said...

didn't Demi go to rehab in the 80's? I really like her for this one b/c of the "ain'ts"- Kim Richards seems totally random, but her sister Kyle is constantly compared to Demi in the looks department...

RocketQueen said...

Rihanna's never been to rehab.

Sis Cesspool said...

Shelly, I was thinking KO as well, taking the hair comment as sarcasm.

SallyAnne said...

I liked what Jeri said what about Christina A. She has been a mess lately. True the AIA are all over the place!!

Beth said...

Could this be pointing in Heather's direction?

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=oCjmDI4AJlk

(This is actually the follow-up to the ad that made her famous.)

Sherry said...

Immediately thought Demi. She did do rehab in her earlier years. If I'm wrong..Well it won't be the first time today.

Sherry said...

One think I think we can all agree on. This BV from Ted wasn't nearly as incomprehensible as usual.

Queen Tidbit said...

Just to toss out something different, what about Courtney Love?

Bubbles said...

um Bubbles, who are you and are you supposed to be me?

And since when is fake hair considered having great hair (Rihanna)

And unless Kelly Osbournes ex dates guys on the regular, I don't know if an isolated incident with a trans girl makes him bi people. Oh and where does Kelly keep her great hair and why don't we ever see it?

therealjadedentrepreneur said...

Lavato.

lutefisk said...

Was Heather Locklear ever considered a diva? I think Demi has always been the one full of herself.

BobNYC said...

Brigadoon Heather for the win.

Cornbread said...

Totally believe this to be Demi M., based on the hair comment alone. It's well known that Demi only washes her hair in Evian water, and never in water from the tap. The "tough chick" comment could refer to some of her movie roles (i.e. "GI Jane" and "A Few Good Men"). I know AK and DM were top suspects for the Smokey Shooter/Mimi Kitten blind, but I don't believe that fits. Mimi has reproductive problems, which Demi does not. I truly believe SS/MK is Jay-Z and Beyonce, especially after the false bump fiasco. Demi M. FTW.

Kimstyle said...

I'm gonna go with heather on this one.

Daya said...

Eva Mendes? She has the hair commercials out now

UNOG News said...

Jennifer Aniston?