Sunday, May 20, 2012

Greatest House Listing Ever


If you know me, you know there is nothing I enjoy more than a great dating profile or some other bravado that some person has written. This is the first time though I have seen that in a house description. This was sent in by a reader who lives in Iowa and it comes from a flyer of a house for sale. Here is a link because the person also made a blog about their house. To appreciate this listing you really have to read it closely and feel the I am better than you way they write. Basically, the bottom line is that they have a price and no matter what is wrong with their house, that is the price you will pay. Notice how the open house is by invitation only. Umm, then how is that open? Even though the electrical wires are almost 100 years old, they will "probably last a few more years," so no price reduction.



58 comments:

timebob said...

you can't rationalize crazy people. Or does Kanye West own the home?

Anonymous said...

La di da

MISCH said...

Now where to begin, new kitchen, bathrooms....grounds need a lot of work and all that furniture please remove as soon as possible....

Rose said...

Lol. That is a lot of information. Granted, you rarely ever sell a home by an open house, it comes off as pretentious. Also, in this market/economy they shouldn't be so black and white about no price adjustments after inspections. What a turn off. You want someone to back out over $500?

seaward said...

I love the cat in their bathtub.

El Roy 13 said...

As I clicked on the blog, You Can Hate Me Now, by Nas came on. It was as if the house was sending out the energy ;)

All I have to say is, whoop di do, we had an ice rink in our side yard every winter in my youth too and I am pretty sure that wasn't included in the real estate info when my dad sold the house (although I should tell the new owner's to include it in theirs, and maybe the house will finally sell). And really, the only thing I found appealing about this house was the cat in the tub.

timebob said...

I love they refer to their backyard as "park-like"

Katie said...

I see nothing wrong with this, except that they are too cheap to have a broker list it. When you're selling your house, you don't walk around saying that "our house is ok, I guess. Ours is just one of many homes available. We hope you choose us"
you play up the upgrades, you give monetary value of the upgrades, and you downplay the shortcomings.

Has this Enty never been a homeowner?

Elizabeth said...

The end is the best part. They are including the attached carpet, the shrubs, the doors (!), even the hot water heater. How lucky can you be?

farmgirl said...

I agree with Katie.
All of this is very important and good information to include in a FSBO listing.
And Elizabeth - this is an offering for sale. If they had gone through a broker, all of that would have been in the fine print. As it stands, it is necessary for them to include that info so there are no problems later.

This post is only offensive if you have no experience with real estate.

msgirl said...

I think it's a nice house, especially the club foot tub, oh my.

I still have the knob and tube electrical. So far it's fine, and an electrician said there's no reason to change it. Yet. It will be at least 25k to fix, and I don't have that big a house! So we'll wait.

I think all that's required to get to see the house is a phone call. If I had people traipsing thru my house I'd want to screen them first.

HOWEVER, I'm not interested in no negotiation, especially since they mention after an inspection, FU.

Rose said...

MSgirl, I think the no negotiations is really dumb considering most of the time people ask for small amounts.

bits of moxy said...

Well call me pretentious, because I see nothing wrong with this listing. Otherwise what Katie said, agree 100%.

Elizabeth said...

farmgirl - Yeah, okay. It makes me think of an old movie with Richard Pryor called "Moving". The seller makes jokes about the windows "are coming with us" among other parts of the house. When Richard Pryor's family arrives, the owner really had taken all the doors, windows, etc. with him.

mannyv said...

Knob and tube am be grandfathered into the code, but the reason you should change it is that It can be unsafe given the current electrical loads. I'm surprised they could get homeowners insurance.

That said, it looks nice, though cramped. Love the attitude, reminds me of California.

Now! said...

Yeah, I've moved into places where the previous tenants basically took the light bulbs with them, mirrors off the walls, etc. So it's a positive to mention that this all comes with the price.

I also didn't think this was out of bounds, although I don't think I would have called the other homes that sold for more an "inferior location." There must be some nicer way to say that.

I sold a home a couple of years ago, through a broker. I actually had to stop them from pumping the ad full of huge exaggerations that I would not have been able to defend in good conscience.

Anotheramy said...

Ive seen lots worse in Craigslist ads for an old couch. It comes off a little pretentious but...

timebob said...

Talking your house up is one thing saying you will not negotiate is another. The housing market has bottomed out so to say your house is so special above all others is insane to not negotiate and claim the 100 year old electricty is your cost to fix after the sale.

I don't know De Moine but $325,000 seems pretty pricey for a lower tier market.

Clearly they love their home. Like a fat toddler in a pagent. You think your kid is the best no matter what.

RenoBlondee said...

Yeah, good luck with selling it without negotiating. Let's see how long that takes.

Othere then that I really didn't see much wrong with the listing either though.

redfishbluefish said...

Having bought and sold a couple of time (including buying our first house thru a FSBO) this is actually fantastic to me. You need all that info when making a decision. While I'm not sure I agree, as others have stated, about the "no negotiation" clause, they at least did state it clearly. If you are an interested buyer, you know what you are dealing with.

I also think the approach here comes from a book called "How to Sell Your Home in 30 Days" or something like that. I remember flipping through it at the library back when I was selling my last one, and I distinctly remember the "by invitation" open house approach. I could be wrong, but I think this seller is following a game plan along those lines.

It's a nice home--I wish them luck. You would have to pay ME $325K to move to Des Moines! (Nothing against Iowa-it's lovely. But it *snows* there!

<-------Florida Girl

redfishbluefish said...

Meant to add also, indicating which fixtures and stuff stay with the house is pretty standard now too. In FL (and probably elsewhere), people have been known to go so far as to strip the copper wiring out of the house before leaving, especially in a foreclosure situation. It's happened multiple times in the n'hood I live in now. So better to be clear up front than have someone assume and end up in court. Lawyers get paid enough as it is! ;)

Ms Cool said...

We made an offer on a house and had an inspection. One of the owners stuck around for the inspection and after we found that the basement walls were going to need a lot of reinforcement, he stupidly said that they weren't going to be fixing anything. We rescinded our offer and the house was on the market for 6 more months. Guess what they fixed?

It worked out for the best. We have a much better house in a better neighborhood. In fact, I love our house so much that I would brag about it when trying to sell it, too!

Florin said...

Huh. I grew up about 20 blocks from that house. For Des Moines, that's pretty pretentious.

anita_mark said...

I read the entire listing waiting for the pretentiousness, I didn't read it. I didn't see anything wrong with that at all.

In my city, in a neighbourhood like that, that house would be listed at double that price, at least. And the ice rink would be a major selling point.

I think mocking this is a stretch. They're trying to sell something, of course they're going to talk it up.

And I liked the kitty in the tub. Their furniture was God awful.

GladysKravitz said...

1. Who the hell wants a neighborhood ice rink in their back yard? Goodbye privacy, hello vandalism, no matter how upper crust your neighborhood is.

2. What is up with that basement bathroom? "(the kids can use it)" OK, that's nice that the kids can use it. May grownups use it too?

3. No negotiations. 'nuf said above.

4. Wallpaper in tiny kitchen. If there's anything that buyers want, it's a kitchen that allows entertaining. Take some of the ice rink and add it to the kitchen. And strip that wallpapering off before you try to sell the place.

5. The elitism of the ad's tone is what's offensive, not the info. There's this tone of "this is THE best neighborhood in Des Moines" (which it may be), which comes off very nouveau riche. It's like talking about how expensive your engagement ring was, or the price of the art on your walls. It's not polite to talk about other houses as "inferior," nor go on and on about how fabulous the neighborhood is.

6. My partner and I decided yesterday that we don't like industrious neighbors---the kind that are out there every weekend with their fingernail clippers on their lawn, casting dirty looks at our lawn that was mowed last weekend (that was our old house, and we moved in part because we got tired of living next door to Barbie and Ken). These people make this house sound as if it's in that kind of neighborhood--Yard Nazis. Not only am I with redfishbluefish regarding never moving to a snow state, but even here in sunny California, you couldn't pay me enough to live in a neighborhood that didn't espouse the live-and-let-live rule.

luckylass said...

I think they edited the listing to be more straightforward. I didn't see anything wrong with it, except that they indicated that they will include the electrical and trees with the house sale. Odd.
I can't throw much shade their way, I made a blogger site to sell my 1998 Subaru and I was able to sell it in one day, with it's full blue book asking price. I had better pictures though.

pusssykatt said...

How do they move in that living room with all of the furniture in it? They should have let some of the other remodeling go, and do the kitchen...it's horrid....and the best bang for the dollar.

slab99 said...

All the information is great, and I don't mind the bragging about the neighborhood and all. But listing the price for every repair or maintenance item is over the top, especially when it seems like they got shafted.

msgirl said...

manny - yeah, the electrician told us that when we want to sell we should change the electrical.

And you're right - that's probably why there's no negotiation after inspection - because the inspector will say that needs to be changed.

I don't know if they can sell the house like that, maybe they can. So between a kitchen remodel and the electrical another what, 60,000 additional? That's nothing for Seattle, but Iowa?

Anonymous said...

Good luck selling a house when you're unwilling to negotiate after inspections. That's not a red flag at all. At the end of the day I think they're trying to sell the neighborhood more than the house. You want to live here b/c people will think you're special so it doesn't matter that it's our responsibility to replace the electrical, you'll pay whatever we want and on our terms b/c if you're not in this neighborhood, you're a loser and everyone will know. And don't try getting a cheaper house a few blocks away b/c that side of the neighborhood is totes inferior.

Cornbread said...

I'm an insurance agent in Florida, and I can tell you that if your home has knob and tube wiring, you're NOT going to find homeowners insurance with any standard carriers. Get ready to pay out the wazoo for a policy with jacked up deductibles through an excess and surplus lines market. Granted, homes in Florida aren't usually 100 years old (our house was built in '78, and is considered "old") so maybe it's no biggie up north.

Agree on the inspection clause - they know an electrician would want that stuff updated to the current code.

yodelay said...

You nailed it Wonder Woman.

NaNa LaLa said...

Lol, I'll be laughing when that blog is updated and they are begging people to buy it for half that price.

Pretentious? Completely for here in Iowa.

House not worth the price and neighborhood not that great. People are not moving into Des Moines, they are moving from it.

All I can say is "good luck" and I was never so happy as the day I moved out of Des Moines.

Redd Penny said...

I wonder if that basement bathroom has a 4-foot ceiling.

Lilies are regularly gilded in real estate listings. It sounds like these folks may have overimproved the house for the market and are trying to recoup those expenses.

Per Zillow, the house was originally on the market for $368,000 and has come down $43,000 already. No wonder they don't want to negotiate.

Zillow's 'zestimate' is $227,000, probably because they are homes within a few blocks for well under $300,000 and a number of foreclosures well below that. The owners posted a rebuttal to that on Zillow.

http://www.zillow.com/homedetails/1065-44th-St-Des-Moines-IA-50311/794569_zpid/

__-__=__ said...

Isn't this a Sears Catalog Home? (Check Wiki)

billybob said...

I’ve worked in places where the electrics fail miserably and the place was only build in 1978. I would only move into a house that had recently been rewired. Definitely wouldn’t want to move into one that was rewired in more than 50-60 years ago.

feraltart said...

I am allergic to cats, so the cat in the bathtub put me right off.
Their taste is different to mine, but I hope they sell, sounds a bit desperate to me.

iknowpeople said...

I see nothing wrong with this whatsoever. In fact, if I was house hunting I'd appreciate the info.

Perhaps Entry has real estate envy since he purportedly lives in mommy's basement.

Sian said...

Don't get it.
I liked the photo with the cat in the bath through :p

Bit dams said...

aww, this is a family that's sad to leave their home. it's like a love letter to the life their leaving behind. i'd live there, sounds great. leave the kitty in the tub!

JSierra said...

That cat is an excellent photobomber. If you click on the additional photos he appears in a few of those as well.

Jessie said...

325K for a four bedroom home is amazing!

Anonymous said...

$325,000 for a living room that small? I would be able to live with the kitchen and the bathroom with the cat. But not the living room. And I would not want kids in my backyard ice rink. Hell, I don't even want any kids of my own.

Sherry said...

No Misch I believe they listed the kitchen as original galley kitchen which means that, while they redid the two bathrooms, they did nothing to the most important room in the house.

MommaBear said...

I'll go out on a limb here and say I really liked the house. With the exception of needing a kitchen remodel, it's still got all it's original charm. And the yard, well we'd kill for a yard like that. Where I live, houses like that, in "historical" neighborhoods, renovated, with that size of lot usually list for $750,000.

reticulation said...

It's really not even that nice on the inside. It's OKAY but nothing to write home about. The floor in the "foosball" room is ugly and the backyard is completely empty for bragging about its flowers. Eh, I've seen nicer. You'd think all that bragging would lead to a stellar set of house pictures.

Moms Who Vax said...

You know, I live in a 100-year-old (plus!) house with knob wiring and my insurance agent didn't blink an eye at that (American Family). I would love to get it rewired, though we haven't had any problems at all. But there's no way we can afford it. Been here five years, everything has been okay. Fingers crossed.

ChasingHeaven said...

My problem with the listing is how they tore down that 75 year old tree because they planned to build a deck but then never got around to it. Well done. Those pesky trees and their leaves falling....it had it coming.... Geez.

Middle-aged Diva (Carol) said...

I don't see anything wrong with the listing blog, except maybe it's TMI and it will work against them. Oh, and that house is cramped and tiny with too much furniture. Too bad they weren't smart enough to get a realtor.

WUWT? said...

Those neighborhood kids making dog biscuits....how very, um, monochromatic they are. Wonder if the "open house by appointment" keeps the neighborhood that way?

Also, why even mention a tree you cut down? *Oh, our yard had a 75-year-old tree, full of leaves. Lots of shade. But it's gone now. Maybe you could build a porch where it used to be?* Why even bring it up?

Sarah J. MacManus said...

It's a nice house, though the listing is a bit TOO detailed. You want to leave SOME mystery to get buyers in the door.

On the other hand, they now have national exposure thanks to this blog, so it really wasn't a bad idea, was it?

I'm not going to run comps, so I have no idea whether or not it's a reasonable asking price.

Vivster said...

My family has been in the real estate business for many many years and I would never even bother with this house. First of all, the appraisal is out-of-date, they are not going to negotiate on price and you will have to replace the electrical at your own expense sooner rather than later. If you are an electrician making a cash offer then maybe consider buying this place. Also I didn't know people bragged about living in Iowa like this.

Anonymous said...

The only thing that really puts me off (besides their insistence that knob and tube wiring is A-OK) is their refusal to negotiate after an inspection. It is almost guaranteed that an inspection on a house that old will turn up some things. It's SOP to renegotiate after that. I think they will find it VERY hard to find someone who will be fine with whatever the inspector finds.

I love the kitty in the tub. I have one who likes to curl up in the sink. But the kitchen is a nightmare and the living room is tiny. And the basement has NO character at all. Plus, for all their bragging about their "parklike" lot, the neighbors on the left seem very, very close.

Lori said...

appraisal is waaay out of date and they should have staged the home for pictures (at the very least).

WUWT? said...

I am getting more and more angered by that "adorable" picture of the kids making dog biscuits. I commented last night about how "monochromatic" the neighborhood appeared to be and maybe the open house by appointment helps keep it that way. Now I have come to believe that that photo is given such a prominent placement SPECIFICALLY to advertise to and reassure potential buyers that the neighborhood is still "pure." I mean, when EVER has a housing listing said, "oh and here are the neighbors!" complete with a photo?! Sure, they want to show they have a good, cohesive, close-knit, socially active neighborhood, but if they ALSO had wanted to show they had a diverse neighborhood, they would have. They specifically wanted to show that they had a NOT diverse neighborhood, and they didn't want to SAY it in those words. So they used a picture. As well as codes like "farther from University." I met someone today who was familiar with the area, so I asked, and she said the neighborhoods get "darker" the closer you get to University. She did not use that word on accident. These home-sellers did not just "happen" to include these details either. To me, this is not a neighborhood that just happens to be mostly white. This is a seller capitalizing on that fact, and the subtle bigotry is infuriating to me.

Anonymous said...

I've got "attitude radar" and I'm not seeing that much of it on the house listing, honestly. It's a bit too much info, but eh, they're house proud. Big deal...

Lori said...

@WUWT?- I got that impression, as well.

Lelaina Pierce said...

I kind of love all the detail, actually. I love looking at real estate and I don't think this is that far off for an FSBO listing. They should have rewired the house instead of some of those other projects. The no negotiation stipulations are going to put a lot of people off.

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