I'm not sure that stealing bacon should be a crime. I think if something is so wonderful and amazing like bacon that it should be shared with the world. I think even Ron Swanson would agree with me that there should be a certain kind of socialism when it comes to bacon and that the whole world should be allowed to eat and enjoy, depending on your religious preferences. While I would not eat turkey bacon, it is a substitute for those who cannot eat pork. For you vegetarians out there, well, at least the smell is nice. Bacon perfume? Free to everyone.
The woman above was arrested for stealing bacon. I don't know how Bossip found her, but they did. She was also charged with some other things because she got out of hand with the store employees who tried to keep her from stealing. She pepper sprayed them and also punched them and spit at them. See, none of these things would have happened if bacon was free. Yes, she also tried to take beer and chicken wings and some cheese, but we all know it was the bacon she wanted.
Sunday, May 27, 2012
See that smile on her face for her mug shot? Bacon was the meal they were serving for lunch.