Friday, June 08, 2012

Fun With Tom Cruise Movies


This ridiculous photo of Tom Cruise led me to think of some movies that might provide some great captions. I'm going to try and come up with 10 so Letterman can take it from me. And I know you must have some great ones that would fit too.


"Is that your Top Gun or are you just happy to see me?"

"Oh, have you been drinking? Looks like this might be Mission Impossible."

"We will make All The Right Moves if The Color Of Money is green."

"I was Born On The Fourth Of July which is why my name is Sparkler."

"Don't tell anyone but I loooooove a nice Firm Cocktail."

"If you pay us extra, we will give you Days Of Thunder and Endless Love."

"You need to use protection because this is a Risky Business."

"This is the first time I have been with a Legend. It is kind of like Losin' It all over again."

"Is it ok if I call you Jerry Maguire in bed?"

"Lions For Lambs sucked."



64 comments:

Vicki Cupper said...

lol @ the last one

annabella said...

very funny and clever enty!

kriss_t said...

Somehow, eyeliner on a dude looks good to me. I put eyeliner on my b/f for a Halloween party as Bret Michaels, and he still had it on when he woke up the next morning. Thought it was kind of hot.

pilly said...

Are you (an) OUTsider!

hothotheat said...

He's got that Far and Away look.

hothotheat said...

Endless Love of money

Sherry said...

kriss_t: I did theatre with a friend who did corporate sales and he couldn't get all the eye makeup off from the show before. His clients were a bit curious about that.

Yeah I'm glad someone else thought this picture was ridiculous. I'm just not getting the "hot" from this at all.

FSP said...

No Few Good Men references?

Elizabeth said...

I see that picture and the girl putting her hand in the top of his pants and all I think is he's limp as a wet noodle because he wants to be the girl.

Vicki Cupper said...

His face looks....odd.

Comma Chaser said...

"Don't let this pic fool you, this three way always has room for A Few Good Men."

Too soon?

#IMayHaveSmokedABigFatBluntBeforeTypingThis

Vicki Cupper said...

^^WIN^^

mannyv said...

"I was looking for a few good men."

curlyhairslacker said...

Hahahahaha, Comma Chaser! :D

Vicki Cupper said...
This comment has been removed by the author.
hothotheat said...
This comment has been removed by the author.
EmEyeKay said...

Enty, those were great. @CommaChaser, yours too.

Vicki Cupper said...

Em, lmao @ your pic!

Seachica said...

"You have me Bewitched. Oh crap, I wasn't supposed to talk about that!"

Shallow Gal said...

I'm trying so hard to get turned on by this photo but it's just not working.

Vicki Cupper said...

Shallow Gal, you must be an angry man-hating lesbian like me and Nanners.

According to the $cientolotrolls on here, anyway.

curlyhairslacker said...

Em, that pic is priceless! Yesterday I thought it was Lindsey but this morning I saw a story posted on fb about her.

Sylvia said...

His Gayness comes out big time LOL

Oh Look I am an Outsy LOLOL

crila16 said...

More like...Unless you're a dude, it looks like this Mission will be Impossible.

I still like him though.

Redheat said...

His tats look as fake as they really are.

supapimp said...

Photoshopped

Denise said...

Ok, Sure looks just like him. I'm sold now.

Steppy said...

The miserable man haters are back! Must be sad to be so filled with hate all the time.

*karen* said...

Must.Not.Feed.Troll.

Beth said...

He looks so bored in this picture.

Vicki Cupper said...

Of course he does, Beth. He just wishes it were Derek Hough and Ryan Seacrest.

misspoppypants said...

There's nothing Firm down there.

misspoppypants said...

Hi, I'm kd lang.

Beth said...

I can just imagine a pic with Hough and Seacrest. They'd probably be all giggly and free.

I bet the waxing bill for that shoot would be huge.

sussique said...

are these press on tats going to stain my thong?

nolachickee said...

I cannot wait to see this film. I laugh so hard at the commercials that my innards hurt. Alec Baldwin alone is so funny. I love how they don't have Tommy Girl speaking in the commercials. That shit is going to be so bad it will be great! I don't know if I'll make it through the whole thing. I'll most likely be escorted out of the theater.

Vicki Cupper said...

Nola, I saw a trailer for it on Tuesday and he...."sings".


*shudder*

nolachickee said...

@Vicki - did you suffer any hearing loss??? Oh my, I don't know if my heart can take me watching this. I may have to take a sedative before entering the theater.

Sis said...

Lol... can you say super photoshopped!

I was trying to come up with "Show me the money" line but failed :) I've got nothing!

love/hate said...

You want the TRUTH??? you can't handle any of these holes.

Vicki Cupper said...

Nola, lmao no, it was very, very quick.

anongkhla said...

This is going in my folder of pics that are never not hilarious. We all need pick-me-ups sometimes.

Ingrid Superstar said...

He's the Vasectomy Kid.

O'Really said...

I am so proud of myself for never, ever finding Tommy Girl attractive...not even in the 80s. I just could not see what my friends saw in him. I was more of a Judd Nelson circa Breakfast Club fan. Mmmm...Judd Nelson

EmEyeKay said...

Thank you @vicki @curly...

Vicki Cupper said...

O'Really, Judd Nelson was a hottie in that movie. Also loved him in Cabin by the Lake, a surprisingly good and creepy TV movie.

Nattery said...

@Steppy. Thinking TC is an overated, control freak midget doesn't make you a man hater or a lesbian. You appear to be the one filled with hate. Chill girl.

Another Josh said...

Did I say I was in "Magnolia?" I meant "man oiled up."

Brenda Love said...

Does anyone know if this is supposed to be a comedy? Seriously.

Denise said...

Brenda...you mean it's possibly not?

Mooshki said...

Cabin By the Lake is a great little movie. The sequel(s) sucked, though. Big surprise.

CK76 said...

"Don't tell anyone but I loooooove a nice STIFF Cocktail."

Topper Madison said...

I'm going to go out on a limb and say I actually *like* Tom Cruise in movies. Repeat: IN MOVIES. I think he's a much better actor than he gets credit for, and I'll see anything he's in. He's great in both comedy and drama, and that's extremely rare. And he does have that killer smile.

That said, I don't like hearing about his personal life, thoughts, opinions, etc. When he's interviewed as himself, he is completely annoying.

I also feel this way about Catherine Zeta Jones. I ADORE her in movies, but whenever she opens her mouth in an interview, I just want to stick a sock in it.

So, yes, I will be going to see Rock of Ages. By myself. At a matinee. And I will enjoy it immensely. (Is Meatloaf in it? 'Cause he should be.)

O'Really said...

Now that I think about it....there is one movie where I enjoyed TC....Tropic Thunder. He was hilarious as Les Grossman.

Sherry said...

Well Topper bravo to you for being honest. And god bless you for seeing it for us all.

Steppy...Half the time you're normal but damn you should know by now that anytime you defend creepy midget you will not be adored. Just give it up. Jeebus, did you have a head injury at some point in your life? Get a clue!

Em-OMG! Girl, that picture...LOL

ardleighstreet said...

There are some men you couldn't get FIRM with a bucket of Viagra and a lifetime of lapdances.

Far and Away this is the most ridiculous photo of Tommy ever.

It takes A FEW GOOD MEN to really make this photo interesting.

I'd rather keep my EYES WIDE SHUT, then them pose this way again.

Let's see if Tommy is a TOP GUN or a MINORITY REPORT.

Aoife said...

I'm still laughing at the comments and the picture. Is he supposed to be sexy there? Asking "don't you wish you were me" with his eyes?

Sorry I have to catch my breath.

anongkhla said...

Yep, I thought he was the best thing about Tropic Thunder. And was pretty shocked by that, after years of finding him competent but not really memorable as an actor. Unremarkable.

An hour and a half of Les would have been just fine by me.

old ;ady said...

Is he standing on a box in this photo? It would take a Few Good Men to make him normal height.

Cosette said...

i just can't look at that picture without snickering.

Mission: IMPOSSIBLE!

Steppy said...

Stop the hate! Men are people too.

lutefisk said...

He looks like a more feminine version of Ali Lohan.

Agent**It said...

Heard from 2 that saw it in LA. They BOTH said Tom C was wonderful and they are no Tammy lovers. Still can't see it from the photos, but the reviews will be interesting !

Lelaina Pierce said...

This might be my favorite picture of him ever. Look at those eyes!