Sunday, December 02, 2012

Hugh Hefner And Crystal Harris Are Getting Married Again

Apparently Hugh Hefner didn't learn his lesson the first time and Crystal Harris figured out a way to get more stuff while still being with who she wants because the couple announced they are engaged again. The first time ended in disaster with Crystal cheating on Hef with Dr. Phil's son and breaking her 9pm curfew and not being the type of girlfriend who was willing to accept her place in the assembly line of sex with an 80+ year old man. Crystal managed to find his Viagra for Hef though and worked his way back into his good graces by pre-chewing his food for him Alicia Silverstone style and going to bed with him every night by 7p. It also goes to show you that no matter how old you are or how wrinkled your body, if you have enough money a 20 something will be willing to marry you.

29 comments:

MISCH said...

Old fool...

PuggleWug said...

I read this on Dlisted last night. I am so in the know, guys.

hazel I girl said...

I knew this would be your 1 story today, lol

Christopher Cruz said...

I just threw up in my mouth a little. Okay, a LOT. Grandpa balls on my chin? No thanks!!!

mynerva said...

I think Hef is smart enough to have his money well protected.

FrenchGirl said...

i don't worry for Hefner:he's a cleveer guy ,he has a huge pre-nuptial agreement

Christopher Cruz said...

Did I say chin? I meant chest...

LottaColada said...

If I remember correctly, he wasn't going to have Crystal sign a pre-nup the first time around. Lets hope he changed his mind this time around. I still think he should've stuck with Holly.

auntliddy said...

I dont even think he has that much money. Anyway, there isnt enough money in the world to make me, as a 26 yr old, embrace this scene, nosiree. He's too old for m enow, lol!! and its not just the age- its the multiple partners, and all the other shit that goes with it. ugh.

ReesesPeace said...

That's the power of pussy, folks!

My *F* key kinda-sorta works. It depends on my patience level (-5...that would be minus-phive) for stabbing the key a kajillion times.

ReesesPeace said...

@Christopher Cruz...Hahahahaa lmfao Yeah, that is a gross visual there. I'm going to have nightmares when I do finally get my ass to bed.

Terri said...

At his age, it's not so much a pre-nup she needs to be concerned with, but the will. He can leave all his belongings and money to whomever he wants.

Did he ever get officially divorced from Kimberly?

goes in circles said...

I am sure he has that much money.

I agree, he should have stuck with Holly. I think she truly loved him. I was a huge Girls Next Door fan. You could tell she was genuine.

Carmelean Karma said...

This old Grandpa has been around the block more than a few times. It's not his first rodeo and he knows how to play the game. He knows her, knows what she is, what she does, and he just doesn't care. Isn't this what most shallow immature men say, that they just want to be rich enough to have an anna nicole smith look alike in their bed when they're in their eighties? Too emotionally immature/crippled and shallow to want a real commitment and emotional bond these men sell themselves short and settle for a pretty face and an empty head. Sad, because it sounds like just an extended prostitution arrangement. How is that fun, hot, or anything good? I guess he can't, is unable, or won't open himself up to real love and is settling for the devil he knows. The only person he's cheating is himself. It's interesting and pretty ironic that the man who is the most responsible for objectifying women in the modern era is himself being objectified for his fortune, in his last years when he will be almost as helpless as an infant, dependent upon a traitorous malicious gossip mongering vapid plastic child woman for eating, diapers, outings, medicine dosage/frequency etc. His dumbing down of the value of the american female as a gold digging sex objectified plastic titted uneducated fashion accessory is going to bite him in his old dependent perverted grey ass. I actually feel sorry for him. No one deserves that in their old age, but as all horrible life lessons inevitably go, he's done it to himself. Sad. What an empty, empty house. No amount of drugs, booze, money or pretty women can fill a home with love and warmth.

Alma said...

I hope this is just a commitment ceremony and he's just pulling her leg but i am his people made sure she can't do crap. Oh well! Dude is old. Probably just wants someone around in these years.

Tuxedo Cat said...

I wonder what Dr. Phil thought of Crystal dating his son...Probably not much.

Farmer Ahn said...

Wow! I never would have thought that but then again I don't believe PR people ( worked for a famous one in Hollywood and we made up stories all day long and we would laugh at the people who believed them) reality tv is fake and game show have casting people. I was several game shows, my agent booked my reality shit with the script. I knew who was the winner before the taping, plus multiple takes in surprised face. Don't give so much, it's fake.

Farmer Ahn said...

Phil is scammer in his own right. Douche!

gr8p said...

Treat 'em mean, keep 'em keen! Can't fault Crystal in this. He clearly likes being humiliated.

Tuxedo Cat said...

@Farmer Ahn

Dr. Phil is?? Tell me more, I had no idea...

Della said...

what happened to Hugh's son? Didn't he get into trouble for hurting his girlfriend. Hugh is never going to get back what he had on that 1st season of girls next door. No one cares now. He is a joke. She is a idiot. She won't be changing his diapers because she will be out shopping.

tamarind said...

loved holly too. that chick saw him as the moon and stars.
poor old hef.

Topper Madison said...

I still have this crazy fantasy that Hef is actually gay and has been all his life, and "Playboy" is the ultimate beard.

I just have this warm visual of him at the mansion on an average Wednesday night playing backgammon with his long-time manservant in kimonos with pekinese dogs on their laps laughing about how gullible the world is to believe that he is actually having sex with all those young women.

When I think of him as the biggest con artist of the century, well, he gets pretty sexy.

DBZee said...

Thank you, Topper, that is the best scenario ever!

ReesesPeace said...

Love Topper's scene up there. I spewed out coffee. I wouldn't be too surprised~what better bearding situation could there possibly be?

Mango said...

I wonder how she worked her way back into his good graces? Or should I say sucked?

califblondy said...

My faith in true love is restored.

mell61 said...

assuming the pre-nup is air tight, it must be time for another round of 'the bride as centrefold', either playboys figures are dropping, or she was that desperate when her singing career didn't pan out. Lets hope they don't have kids, that much stupid shouldn't be passed onto another generation!

Cornbread said...

Topper, I'd totally believe it. Hugh was the top guess for the old Ted C. blind vice "Petered Metered."