Saturday, November 17, 2012

SNL Intro Supercut


Blind Items Revealed

May 5, 2008

#2 - Our B list film actress who happens to be married to a real winner was on a recent modeling shoot. Our actress loves crack and had arranged to meet a friend of a friend while she was in this city not her own who was going to supply her with everything she needed. He did show up, and she bought enough rocks to get her through the day. Unfortunately she didn't have a crack pipe because she didn't want to carry it on the plane. Her dealer didn't have one either. To say she was upset was an understatement. She sent her dealer and her assistant out to get one. They came back a short while later with one they had got from a homeless person for $100. Our actress didn't even bother to say thanks. Just spent the next hour in kind of a haze, the photo shoot be damned.

Brittany Murphy

Blind Items Revealed

April 29, 2008

#2 - For some reason this famous co-star couple continues to pretend they are a couple, when in fact it ended quite some time ago. My guess is because they don't want to make the guy look like he was after only one thing.

Hayden Panettiere & Milo Ventimiglia

Blind Item #3

This B-/C+ list actress has A list name recognition. She will do any kind of acting and has done so. This week she told a co-star that she had made out with a guy for the first time in five years. As she was saying this she was jumping up and down and laughing and everyone apparently was ecstatic for her. Everyone assumes she will pass out from happiness once she has sex again.

Blind Items Revealed

April 17, 2008

This is probably not the guy daddy wants her to bring home, so she didn't. The daughter of this fashion guru was spotted at an event getting hot and heavy with a B+ rap star. They had been doing the bathroom runs all night and spent lots of time groping and kissing, but decided not to use the bathroom for doing the dirty. Instead, they made their way outside, got into his limo for 20 minutes and then came back inside looking, well, like they had just spent 20 minutes in the back of a limo doing the nasty. Shortly thereafter, our rap star took his leave, and a different woman home with him.

Ally Hilfiger

Raising Sextuplets Mom Is Pregnant

Jenny McClendon has been pretty quiet since she got married earlier this year to the guy she was cheating on her husband with. Of course her husband did beat her, so I'm glad she left him. Anyway, Jenny was on the show Raising Sextuplets. That was at the peak of if you have multiples we will give you a television show and they had one and it was pretty interesting. Jenny is now 30 weeks pregnant with a boy and says that even though she has 6 kids of her own and her current husband has 2 kids of his own that they knew right away they wanted #9. Apparently Jenny has also been pushing to have a new reality show and was disappointed that a network didn't want to follow her once she found out she was pregnant. It kind of makes you wonder if this was a reality show thing or a wanting to get pregnant thing.

Blind Item #2

This A list country singer got more than he bargained for this week when the fire alarm went off in his hotel while he was in bed with his boyfriend. Because the closeted singer who has been in some high profile heterosexual relationships didn't want anyone to see who he was with and the way they were dressed in bed, they decided to ignore it. Well, the management didn't ignore it and used a key to come into his room and order the couple out. In their leather outfits. Our singer said the couple were going to a costume party. At 2am. With their singers hanging out if you know what I mean.

Kim Kardashian Weighs In On Middle East Conflict

Despite the 5,000 people in London who showed up to see Kim Kardashian, she knows, and the rest of her family knows that she is struggling to find relevancy or new crowds of people to like her or buy her products. Apparently yesterday she decided that she was some kind of Middle East peace broker or thought that people around the world would care what she had to say about the situation there. She sent two tweets, the first, telling people to pray for people in Israel and then another telling people to pray for the Palestinians. When her Twitter exploded with people trashing her and telling her she didn't know what she was talking about she deleted them. Later she posted an apology to her website and said she should have explained further before Tweeting. Or she could have just stayed out of it and killed another 10 or 15 animals so she would have something to wear tomorrow. Whatever plan she and her mom hatched at the beginning of the year is clearly not working and her decline has begun. The thing is the decline has not begun for her sisters which is interesting and which probably causes her to scream and yell every night and tell them how much money she has compared to them and how she is her mom's favorite. Until she stops earning the most.

Blind Item #1 - Easy Easy

This former A list tweener and now just an A lister in his mind had just sat down to dinner with his former B list tweener girlfriend when she asked to see his phone. He said no. She got up and left the dinner and said she never wanted to see him again.

The Hollywood Reporter Reviews Liz & Dick

Last night after reading the review The Hollywood Reporter published about Lindsay Lohan's Lifetime movie, Liz & Dick, I had to Tweet it. This week is obviously the golden week of reviews when you have Guy Fieri's restaurant review and this gem about Liz & Dick. Some excerpts for you before you read the whole thing here.

It should come as no great surprise that Lifetime’s Liz & Dick movie starring Lindsay Lohan is spectacularly bad.

Lohan is woeful as Taylor from start to finish. But, whatever you do, don’t miss Liz & Dick. It’s an instant classic of unintentional hilarity. Drinking games were made for movies like this. And the best part is that it gets worse as it goes on, so in the right company with the right beverages, Liz & Dick could be unbearably hilarious toward the tail end of the 90-minute running time. By the time Lohan is playing mid-’80s Taylor and it looks like a lost Saturday Night Live skit, your body may be cramped by convulsions.

Anyway, on to the parts of the film where people walk and talk. The talking part doesn’t turn out so well for Lohan. There is not one minute in this film where she’s believable.

The only downside to the review is he does not really provide any suggestions to what parts repeat in order to make a great drinking game.  If you see someone that has a positive review of the movie it probably means that Lindsay owes them money; it is their first day on the job; their cousin is a drug dealer and don't want to lose out on business; or it's Dina pretending to be a reviewer.

Friday, November 16, 2012

Random Photos Part Three

Ben Affleck ended up on top again, but this time it is an accident. He is watching the kids while Jennifer Garner is filming in New Orleans.

Dakota Fanning goes goth in NYC for the Twilight premiere there,
Ashley Greene and Kellan Lutz were also there.
Even Howard and Beth Stern showed up.
Gary Busey at the airport. Not sure if he flew or wanted to see if he could fly.
The US Women's Gymnastics team reunited yesterday for the first time in awhile.
Halle Berry picking up Nahla from school.
Well hello, Jennifer Aniston.
She is really good at that practice laugh. How come she can't do it in a movie?
Jen was at an event honoring Ben Stiller. Still not sure how he got Christine Taylor to be his wife.
Eugene Levy and Martin Short presented Ben with the honorary key to Canada.
Laura Dern was there too.

Random Photos Part Two

Jonah Hill wanted to show off his love for Channing Tatum and ended up with a nasty paper cut.

Jessica Simpson filming a Weight Watchers commercial yesterday.
Kristen Bell on set and probably going to be filmed from the waist up.
This is a very happy Kevin Spacey leaving dinner in London with a guy you can barely see in the background. Bill Clinton.
I think Liberty Ross forgot to button a button at
Kate Moss' birthday party.
Miley Cyrus on her way to pick up Liam for dinner.
Miranda Kerr looking amazing.
Mila Kunis is
a flosser.

Random Photos Part One

Three parts today. Nicole Richie taking Harlow to ballet class while Nicole's friend pretends to be interested in what Nicole is saying.

Olivia Wilde gets really intimate with Jason Sudeikis.
Tina Fey going really risque for her.
Of course if you bring out Tina Fey, you know SNL cast members will follow.
Padma Lakshmi in Playboy.
Ryan Gosling learns a song on a conch shell.
Rihanna in Toronto last night on her 777 tour.
Snooki doing some good work to help the people of the Jersey Shore region.
Tyra Banks brings out her top knot. That is some big hair.
Vince Vaughn on the set of his new movie.

Ellen Talks About Ellen On SNL

If you have not seen Kate McKinnon's portrayal of Ellen on Saturday Night Live, it is hilarious. On her show this week, Ellen decided to break down the impersonation and discuss.

Blind Item #6

This always A list singer is fighting for his life and is losing the battle. No matter what treatments he tries and no matter what he does to try and improve, things don't. Everyone is shocked that he has a chance to make it through 2012.

Blind Item #5

This Victoria's Secret model is not one of the big names of the company, but she did walk in their recent fashion show. At a party last night she was drinking heavily among other things and took a butter knife and slashed her throat in front of everyone leaving a huge gash and blood pouring down her body and she just wiped it off and kept partying.

Jeff Lewis Is Suing Jenni Pulos

For years, Jenni Pulos has been Jeff Lewis's assistant. In case you don't recognize the names, Jeff and Jenni co-star on Flipping Out. It is one of my favorite shows and the pair split as boss and employee a few years ago and Jeff called it a divorce. They got back together and apparently this is going to have a very nasty ending. Jenni has been in the process of writing a book which she says is a self-improvement type book but apparently Jeff thinks it is going to include things about him and their work together and wants to stop any sales of the book. He would also love to read it, but Jenni as been advised to not let him. I doubt Jenni would say anything nasty about the guy she works for, especially since she has signed two separate confidentiality agreements. Now, when Zoila finally comes to her senses and leaves, then there will be a book worth reading.

Four For Friday - The Family Man

It's Friday. That must mean announcements. Not too many. I will be here all weekend and just as a heads up, I will be posting on Thanksgiving too. I can eat and booze one handed. Just hand me a turkey leg while I type. Tomorrow I will reveal a blind item or two from the archives. If you are looking for extra blind items and some things not on the site, you can follow me on Twitter. @entylawyer

This actor is A list. He is everyone's best friend and everyone loves him and the world feels like it would die without his movies. If there was an America's Sweetheart for actors, he would be at the top of the list. Always the family guy he has been married for quite some time. He has kid(s). It is that easy, heartwarming kind of thing he has going that makes it so easy for him to talk that teenager back to his room or his condo which he keeps just for that kind of thing and see how open they are to things. And by things I mean, our actor has a very dark side which never shows itself in public. It has showed itself in a role or two and in an interview you will sometimes see a brief flash and wonder where it came from. He loves finding teens. It is always teens for him and he loves to see what he can talk them into. Loves seeing what they will do for him that they never would consider. He can be extremely rough and violent but always makes sure everything is consensual. He finds a teen and they go to his place or hotel. never anywhere in public. Ever. Room service and then he does what he does. It can be anything from convincing them he can get them in one of his movies to helping them with their homework. Whatever it takes to get their clothes off and his kinks satisfied. It is really interesting that when he was first starting out in movies he actually starred with one of the most sexually violent actors working today. Who knew they both would become such big stars.

Your Turn

Favorite season of the year.

Blind Item #4

This C+/B- list actress should be way more famous than she is. Hit television shows and huge, monster hit movies, but still not really reaching a level of fame you would expect. Most of it is her own doing though. The actress, who is gay, and not really closeted, but not open either, just likes living a very private life. She says that most people know she is gay, but when she got what she considers her big break, the director didn't think she could be sexy heterosexually since she was gay so he told her to prove it to him. They were at lunch, sitting across from each other in a booth. She came over to his side of the table, whispered in his ear, and then proceeded to manually stimulate him until completion while at the same time whispering in his ear. She got the part and has played some very sexy heterosexual women ever since.

Lindsay Lohan Is Delusional And 50

Lindsay Lohan was on Good Morning America this morning. If you ever are asking yourself whether you should chain smoke cigarettes, just listen to Lindsay for about 30 seconds and you will have your answer. This is the same as almost every other Lindsay interview where she thinks everyone is to blame for all her problems except for herself. The thing I found most crazy and where she was obviously lying is she said that she had never heard that her dad might have fathered a child years ago. Are you kidding? This story has been in the news for years and when the reporter asked about it is the first time she has ever heard of it? This is why you can't believe anything she says or Dina says or Micheal says. She could have said that she didn't know her dad had been discovered to be the dad. That would have been a lie, but believable because it might not have reached her. But claiming she never heard anything about this is a lie which is not only unnecessary but makes everything she ever says most likely false too. After her most recent disasters, she is going to be very lucky to ever get hired for anything ever again. I hate writing anything Lohan twice in a day, but I just don't understand how anyone can be a fan, and really have a tough time understanding how anyone ever hires her.

Katie Holmes On Jimmy Fallon

Sunday would be the sixth anniversary for Tom Cruise and Katie Holmes. Think she is happier now? Watch her on Jimmy Fallon.

Blind Item #3

This barely out of her teens all movie actress is probably B list, but she is fairly anonymous about it. She just seems to mash in with all the others that are exactly her same age and all compete for the same roles. Her name is memorable and opens doors though. That is what makes her stand out. Anyway, she had a fling with an almost A list all movie co-star recently who is well over twice her age. She was madly in love with him. he just wanted the conquest because of what happened a couple of decades ago. Once he had taken her he never spoke to her again except while actually filming.

Jason Aldean Says Everything Is Fine Again

Yesterday, Jason Aldean and Jessica Aldean appeared on CBS together and Jason said that despite the fact that he cheated on his wife that everything is good. Whenever Jessica would start to say anything, Jason would cut her off and make sure she did not say anything that would embarrass him or hurt his chances with the ladies in the future. This interview just made him look even more like an a-hole than we already know he is.

Blind Item #2

This A list all movie actor has banned his house sitting girlfriend from his movie set. He is in a foreign location and she is watching his place and that is exactly where he wants her because he has been sampling a different woman every night since he has been gone. He says that it will help him remain faithful when he gets back home and he wants to get it all out of his system. The sad thing is, he could just tell his girlfriend and she wouldn't go anywhere because she is that crazy about him. Sure she would yell and scream and knowing her, might throw some things at him and threaten to cut off his manhood, but eventually she would relent. Yeah, his girlfriend has a bit of a temper.

Gretchen Rossi Gets $500K

It took three years, but Gretchen Rossi was awarded $500K in damages in her defamation suit against her ex-boyfriend Jay Photoblou. Jay had said that he was Gretchen's real boyfriend and that Gretchen  was only faking her relationship with Jeff Beitzel to get Jeff's money before he died. Gretchen had always said Jay was a friend even though she had his name tattooed on her and that their relationship ended before she started dating the dying millionaire.

Blind Item #1

This actress used to be on the cusp of A list. She is still a B now. Always movies. A very good actress with lots of awards. She has been in some very very high profile relationships and even crazier breakups. At an event this week, our actress was talking to herself throughout the entire evening, even during presentations. At several points she would get loud enough where the entire room could hear her. She would repeat the same things constantly and would stand up and sit down frequently. People tried to calm her at the beginning but she would just get louder if they did, so they just let her be. She didn't speak to anyone the entire night except herself and at the end of the night left as if nothing had happened. People will be talking about this one for awhile.

Grant Bowler Is Not A Fan Of Lindsay Lohan

If you read between the lines of the interview Grant Bowler did with the NY Daily News, you get the feeling that he hated every second of working with Lindsay Lohan. Of course this would assume she did actually work, which it sounds like she didn't. I don't think it is any shocker that the producers of Liz & Dick hated Lindsay as did the producers of Scary Movie 5. You know, when you are trying to get work, it is probably a good idea to not make everyone who can possibly hire you or offer you a job, hate you. It makes it very tough to get work. There are way too many people looking for work in the movies or on television to have to work with someone who is going to be a pain and is not that great of an actor to begin with. Anyway, Grant says that he grew up in a hard working family so he works hard at what he does and puts in hours and hours of labor. He said that Lindsay's approach is instinctive and that she just kind of shows up and expects everything to work out well.

Goodbye Hostess

After almost 80 years of turning chemicals into wonderful goodness, Hostess says it is closing. A strike has forced the company to close its doors and lay off 18,500 workers and sell all their assets. This of course means that if you need a Twinkie fix you better rush out and stock up. It will be a personal decision for you whether a certain day or occasion becomes Twinkie worthy. Goodbye fruit pies. I will miss your frosty goodness and the disappointment I felt when I hit actual fruit and realized all my lovable heavily sugared frosting was gone. Donettes. Your one bite of powdered sugar buzz were gone in an instant and your five fellow brethren followed in short order making it necessary to buy multiple packs at a time. The chocolate were never quite as good as the powdered. Ho'Ho's. Unwrapping you one layer at a time. Your soft, cake embraced by chocolate which would stain my hands for days if I was not quick enough, will be missed. Cup Cakes with your mystery frosting on top that seemed to be part glue and part sugar and never wavered in its pattern of strange loops. You will be missed. Wonder Bread. How will grilled cheese ever taste the same.

Cesar Millan Says He Attempted Suicide

In a new documentary that airs later this month, Cesar Millan says that he attempted suicide back in 2010 by trying to overdose on pills. He says that when one of his dogs died and his wife left him that he was at his lowest point and that he tried to kill himself. Umm, didn't his ex-wife leave him because he was cheating on her and he had to pay her off so she wouldn't tell the world all about his cheating? He makes it sound like in this documentary that he was some kind of innocent. To me, that sucks. I think he also paid her off about sex tapes and other things he made. Attempting suicide is horrible and I encourage anyone to get help, but, I do wonder if he is blaming factors he wants to make public, rather than the actual factors involved.

Selena Gomez And Justin Bieber Are Having Sex Again

And just like that, Selena Gomez has forgiven Justin Bieber for hitting on all the Victoria's Secret models and taking one on a date which he definitely tried to make not platonic. I really don't understand Selena. She seems like she is smart and strong and capable of being independent, but lets a tiny little ant walk all over her and do what he wants, when he wants and she just lets him back. On Wednesday night the pair spent the night at Selena's house and because they didn't have enough privacy they went and checked in at the Four Seasons in Beverly Hills yesterday. You know, because Justin likes to get freaky and the walls at Selena's house are not thick enough. Can you imagine Bieber actually getting freaky? The guy has a really bad 4th grade drawing of a cartoon owl tattooed on his arm. Let me know when it says I am the God of Hell Fire and I will give it some respect.

Drug Charges Dropped Against Jon Bon Jovi's Daughter

The District Attorney responsible for prosecuting the heroin and pot possession case of Jon Bon Jovi's daughter Stephanie, has dropped the charges against them. Because of an amendment to the penal code that was enacted back in 2011, anyone who calls for help because of a drug or alcohol emergency can't be prosecuted if police find a small amount of drugs in their possession. It is to encourage people to call and get help rather than be scared of getting help because they will end up in jail. Her boyfriend, who had also been charged, called police because Stephanie had overdosed on heroin. She was alive in her dorm room when paramedics arrived and was rushed to the hospital, where she remained as of yesterday.

Thursday, November 15, 2012

Random Photos Part Three

Ben Affleck gets the top spot because it has been awhile and because this is a pretty adorable photo of him cleaning his daughter's face because of

this.
Beyonce goes makeup free.
Christina Milian at the Clippers game last night.
All hail Henry Winkler. This is him with Alicia Silverstone at the premiere of their new play.
I love when Angelina Jolie gets her serious face on.
Javier Bardem and Penelope Cruz strolling through Europe.
Look who is coming back to The Office. It's Jan.
This really could have been on top. If you are a 70 year old Judge Judy and can rock a bikini like this, you really should be the top photo.
Apparently Jennifer Love Hewitt has just shared a joke. The guy should laugh. Jennifer is his boss.
Jonathan Rhys Meyers shows off his co-star and now girlfriend.