Tuesday, January 01, 2013

Blind Items Revealed

July 27, 2012

#2 - This now almost A list television actress on a hit network comedy recently split from her husband. He said that her most annoying habit is that when she has sex she sings. Really softly, but she does sing and does it the entire time. Even if you tell her to be quiet she starts again after a few seconds.

Zooey Deschanel

80 comments:

cinephreak said...

Lmfaon
I remember this. Wasn't it obvious?

hunter said...

Nooooooo!!! That is so goddamn annoying! Who would actually do that? Seriously?!?!!!

CarrieL84 said...

Bwahahaha. Amazing!

KPeony said...

Hahaha I loved this blind. Glad it's her. She's annoying.

mynerva said...

This was well guessed. I wonder what she sings?!

Betsy said...

Maybe that's how she keeps the beat.

Momster said...

Hopefully it's not the song about cotton. . .

Mari said...

You mean he didn't think it was adorkable?
Imagine that. ;)

libby said...

I wonder if she does "It's Cold Outside", like in Elf, because she has a date-rape fantasy?

That's the joke (Rainier Wolfcastle voice again)

Shocky said...

I hope she sings Baby, It's Cold Outside all year round.

Lisa said...

that's sooo funny! her show is her life!

Shocky said...

One mind, @ Libby

Candyland said...

Nice one Momster!

LottaColada said...

Lol this is crazy, what an annoying habit.

Pip said...

She annoys the crap outta me. This is hilarious!

T said...

AHHHHHH!! I feel like I should like her and sure she's cute and quirky but damn - she is way more annoying than cute. This would annoy me to no end!

Anna V. Xol said...

This one is hilarious! Does she sing about what they're doing? I keep picturing the way she sings on the new girl. Like her ring tone. Now i have the giggles. All the other blinds were meh but this one is awesome!

ChasingHeaven said...

I'm seriously dying to know what she's singing.

Norte said...

I think it could be quite lovely and tender actually.

MacAttack said...

She can do that all she wants if i was with her. Love me some Zooey!

libby said...

I really can't stay
Baby it's cold outside
I gotta go away
Baby it's cold outside
This evening has been
Been hoping that you'd drop by
So very nice
I'll hold your hands their just like ice
My mother will start to worry
Beautiful what's your hurry?
My father will be pacing the floor
Listen to the fireplace roar
So really I better scurry
Beautiful please don't hurry
Well maybe just a half a drink more
Put some records on while I pour

The neighbors might think
Baby it's bad out there
Say.. what's in this drink?


http://www.salon.com/2012/12/10/is_baby_its_cold_outside_a_date_rape_anthem/

Unknown said...

I can see her doing this, just like in Elf. Wonder if it is the same song?

Meanie Rhysie said...

I can only hope she doesn't sing like me...well, I don't sing...I caterwaul.

Maybe it is a rhythym thing...? *shrugs* Not the strangest sex thing I've heard.

timebob said...

i'm not much of a fan of this oh im so adorkable trend but wow that must be annoying in bed

HolidayinCambodia said...

Well, whenever he - you know, when he came... he would scream out, "Surrender Dorothy!" That's all! Just "Surrender Dorothy!"

Instead of saying something normal like, "Oh, God," or something normal like that. I mean, it was pretty creepy! And I told him I thought so, but he just, he just couldn't stop, he just, he just couldn't stop, he just... couldn't stop.

Alicia said...

I find her cute and annoying at the same time. How is that possible?

Anonymous said...

Yeah I'm LMFAO too," la la la LAA la,,, the hills are aliiive... "honey ssshhh you're ceeping me out,..." hmmmm hmmm hmmhmmmm... so frickin weird. "

Amber said...

karen got it in 2!

Jules_345 said...

This makes me laugh...such silliness!

libby said...

I read this recently, just wanted to explain what seemed to be a date-rape joke.

I copy/pasted the lyrics; I think it's really misspelled.

Betsy said...

Maybe she sings some whack songs to freak him out. Like "Hit 'Em Up Style" by Blu Cantrell.

Anonymous said...

Holiday in Cambodia: For serious? That's hilarious, You've got me rolling on the frickin floor with that one! Surrender Dorothy??!!!! seriously, tears, rolling, down, my cheeks, so funny! Surrender DorothYYY!!!!

badhatharry said...

Ben Gibbard knows ball gags exist, right?

teg said...

Grody + hilarious, but so not surprising.

Fluffy White Clouds said...

Singing in bed. While doing the deed, beyond strange. The line between the characters she plays and her life are very blurry apparently. I was sure she was the one who liked bondage!

Jason Blue Eyes said...

@Holiday - AWESOME After Hours reference. LOL.

Chismosa Street said...

I bet she wears opaque tights in bed as well.

Pip said...

Libby, that song has always creeped me out. She and Him do a version where She (Zooey Deschanel) sings the rapey verses. It isn't half bad!

Eeekalicious said...

That has got to be one of *most* annoying habits I have ever heard of.

Shit You Can't Buy said...

HAHHAHHAAHHAHHAHAHA
Omg, if it was a scene from New Girl I wouldn't have been surprised.. but really? That anyone does that.. And such a turn off, imagine it!
'I am almost there, lalalalalalalaalalalalaaa *voice goes higher and higher*' TERRIBLE

Kloie said...

@ Libby, my husband is always like, "uh, do people actually listen to the lyrics to this song?"

MaxineAlisha said...

She's too awesome!

libby said...

Hey, Puggle--That link I posted has RICARDO MONTALBAN singing it in an old movie, when he was young.

It IS creepy.

(Yes, KAHN in all his forms is always all-caps.)

Anonymous said...

Okay, I get it now, @Holiday, I thought you were making a personal reference to your own life experience, definitely gave me the giggles though!

JSierra said...

hahaha I remember this being a really obvious one, but hilarious none the less.

I can picture her singing Christmas carols and trying to harmonize with herself.

JSierra said...

Betsy that one has me rolling on the floor laughing with my New Years day cocktail.

discoflux said...

The touch, the feel of cotton. The fabric on our bed.

Mari said...

My Mum, just upon my mentioning the name, just used an old Scots expression "Creepin' Jesus, I would never tire of punching her in the face. What a daft woman!"
Tell us how you really feel Mum!

Agent**It said...

"Baby it' s cold outside" Ella and Satchmo version, on my top 10 list.

libby said...

lol, disco!

...'the fabric of our Hanes'

Kinda romantic.

JSierra said...

Jason Blue Eyes comment original comment on the post has me giggling now that we know Kaley reads the site.

HolidayinCambodia said...

@ Anna: I saw that movie in 1986-87 with my now ex-wife. I had been a virgin when we started seeing each other, and I did that for a few weeks after we saw the movie and then from time to time over the next 20 years or so.

Leah said...

"Creepin Jesus" will be added to my repertoire, a cousin to my "Christ on a cracker" quip.

Linnea said...

So what about making out? Is she just humming then? Trying to picture this (not in that way!)

Kelly said...

You guys are on a roll today! HAHA

annanaannnaaaa said...

Haha anytime I've called it the date rape song, I've been frowned at.

Alicia said...

Haha! Almost all my comments are done in a Dave chappelle as Rick James voice .. It's my automatic go to. Bitches!

Mari said...

Awesome, it's a favourite in my family. Just be prepared for people to ask if you're from Glasgow (online only, since, if it's in person, nobody can miss Glaswegians)!

Anon said...

Or stick his penis...or put a pillow over her face.

Alicia said...

My favorite comment of the day!!

Anonymous said...

Howard Stern had a parody of that song a few weeks ago making fun of the lyrics it's crazy how date rapey they are......the parody has lines
Iike ...." the handcuffs are here" , " the duct tape is near" it was funny only because it highlighted how bad the song is not because date rape is funny.....Anyway I remember Zooey being the main guess for this blind it's pretty strange

manifestDensity said...

Yeah the singing would be weird, which is odd because I'm usually a big fan if a woman wants to do a little humming...

Sarah said...

The first time maybe. It would be very off putting to me.

a non a miss said...

This is funny to me. I get irritated by her and when she is described as 'adorkable' I see red. I dunno why.

Kelsey said...

I can't stand her or her fake little band. I love M. Ward's music when he's solo but she's such an awful singer that she ruins She & Him. Plus I love Ben Gibbard so there may be a little more hate going to her than warranted hahahah

LOL @ manifest!

Jamie 2 said...

Finally someone I have heard of! I watched Elf last night on Amazon. I'm more familiar with Zooey from the tabs and several movies than as a TV actress.

@Agent**It: Ella and Louis rock that song. How anyone can think of it as a date rape song is beyond me. It's totally flirtatious and of the time. The "nice" girl must make all the requisite protests to protect her reputation before gleefully succumbing to his charms.

Olive said...

Still love Zooey (music, movies, tv) but I will a tiny bit less if another blind I read was about her. Not scandalous, just rude.

mannyv said...

I guess she could go all kinky with her songs too:

Singing in the Rain
Cleveland rocks
I Get a Kick out of You
The various Oompa-Loompa songs
Whistle While you Work
My Favorite Things
Working in the Coal Mine

It's amusing and horrifying at the same time. Maybe she should just stick to the "no/yes" song from History of the World?

Mango said...

She is too precious for her own good.

DontRainOnMyPrada said...

Well, Colbie Caillat and Gavin DeGraw really bring the date rape aspect of this song to life, especially if you know how creepy he was in interviews this past summer when promoting his summer tour with her....

Henriette said...

But she is just so adorable! Isn't it cute when a nearly 40 year old woman talks baby talk and sings? I bet she wears a tutu too.

Jazzy said...

Poor Zooey. I tried, but I just can't with her. I've always been suspicious of her infantile act, but now I'm wondering if she's actually mental.

OneGirlRevolution said...

@Betsy...LOL! I picture her singing Marvin Gaye's "Let's Get It On" in her annoying kid voice.

She irrationally irritates me...but I love her sister.

Anonymous said...

Maybe he's not good in bed so she sings "My Favorite Things" Whenever he does _______, I simply remember my favorite things, and then [it] doesn't feel so bad."

Tara said...

Heh. I was just thinking of that scene. LOVE Afterhours.

Lelaina Pierce said...

I think she has a lovely singing voice, but this is a little weird.

Picturing Zooey singing Blu Cantrell made me giggle. :)

Lelaina Pierce said...

@Libby - I had never thought about that song being date rape, but it is a little creepy in reading the lyrics.

I found this link on Cracked, 8 Romantic Songs You Didn't Know Were About Rape.

Blake said...

If she has enough composure to sing while they're having sex, he's definitely doing it wrong.

Zeeky_Boogy_Doog said...

She irritates the crap out of me! I think I watched ten minutes of "New Girl" when it premiered, but it made me cringe instead of laugh.

There's a woman I know that reminds me of her. She always posts photos of herself being cute and quirky, with "look how cute, quirky and original I am!" -type captions. I'm all for a person being unique, but this just goes into vapid, exhibitionist, Narcissist territory.

Scallywag said...

I was thinking she was singing The Wheels on the bus go round and round...

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