Today's Blind Items - The Breakdowns
This celebrity has always been one of my favorite people. Take away one really bad boyfriend decision and the rest is golden. Despite reaching at one point, almost superstar status, this celebrity has now settled won to a comfortable C+ where she can be a celebrity and an actress and still enjoy solid A- name recognition without the pressure that goes with it. Everytime she tries to do something or start working more, the same demons come back to haunt her. Our celebrity has had several complete breakdowns requiring hospitalization, but she is very good at keeping her private life private. She has had some miscarriages with her husband that have even brought more pain and the doctors think her medications might be interfering with her attempts at getting pregnant. The problem is that when she stops taking her medications everything gets crazy for her and she goes through depression so bad that she is almost catatonic for days on end and then yells and screams at people for the next week. You would never know it by looking at her and how kind she is to everyone while on meds, but when she is off them, she is unrecognizable.
134 comments:
Damn everyone actress Enty likes is either all TV, not married, or A list so I got nothing.
Catherine Zeta Jones, but I don't know who the boyfriend is.
I don't think CZJ - she's a little beyond getting pregnant I think. But otherwise, I've got nothing.
Whomever this is, it sounds like a terribly sad situation. :-(
Mandy Moore?
Mandy is an awesome guess. Bad BF decision = Wilmar Valderrama.
Ugh. I recently tried (for the third time) to go off my anti-depressant. I had never been on them prior to my ex leaving, but when she took off I was freaked out. Now my life is stable again and I don't need the drugs to manage depression, but trying to get off them is a nightmare. For a week or so I feel amazing - side effects start going away, etc - but then it goes downhill fast. I take a very low dose, so it amazes me how hard it is to stop. I feel for whomever this is.
I've had miscarriages. I wouldn't wish them on anyone. My heart goes out to her.
Drew Barrymore
@Lucas - are there any homeopathic things you can do to help with the effects? Acupuncture? Supplements? Exercising on a regular/daily basis? I have a very difficult time forcing myself to go to the gym (I'm fatigued almost 100% of the time due to poor sleep and constant pain), but I feel great after I start working out.
@Lucas I was on them for about a year when my ex was being nuts. I tried to get off and same thing happened. What got me over the hump was SLOWLY reducing them. I took a half pill for about a week and then a half every other day until I finally stopped. It worked for me. (I also drank a little more than usual, hey it helped!) Of course, talk to your doctor and all! Good luck!
Go @Alice Tate! I think you got it!! Found an old article where she talks about depression Mandy Moore Depressed
I was thinking Mandy Moore too, but I don't think she ever quite reached "almost superstar" status. I think she's also had multiple bad boyfriends.
Mandy Moore is a great guess
Brooke Shields? I have no clue.
Lucas- I have some bipolar and depression issues. I started taking 100mg 5HTP every night before bed. It has worked wonders! I sleep well, wake up rested and virtually no side affects, if I don't take it I do turn into a demon. :) otherwise it is the phucking bomb! And it is cheaper than anti depressants. 30$ for a bottle of 120 pills, which last 120days.
Definitely sounds like Bipolar disorder.
Emily Blunt?
Keri Russell?
Smash- you take the 5htp for that reason? My sister in law takes it for weight loss. If it helps for your issues I may want to give it a try. I quit taking my depression meds and have to keep biting my acidic tongue.
Thanks for the comments/advice all! You guys are awesome. I am going to meet with my doctor to try a more structured program than "I ran out, maybe I won't refill".
@Amber - I bike to work regularly, though not as much as I'd like. The problem with the pills is I am taking a SSRI (sertaline/Zoloft) and it changes your brain chemistry. When you go off abruptly your brain starts freaking out, and no amount of sunshine and sweat will fix that.
@Renoblondee - that's my next plan.
@Smash -are you in Spokane? I saw you post something about Dick's Hamburgers on Oscar night. If so, where do you get that?
I feel for her as anyone who has experienced a miscarriage will.....the depression the guilt...awful...
Brooke Shields fits kinda. But other than that I got nothing.
@Lucas - Bummer. Good luck :/
I like the Mandy Moore guess, and feel terrible for her, she always looks so sweet and kind. Hope things get better.
Lucas, me too. I've been off and on Zoloft for 11 years. I just stopped taking it again, as I gained 20 pounds on it. I am starting to feel better 1 week off the meds.
I'm iffy on 5-HTP, as I can't tell much difference from it. I do like L-Theanine for sleep.
Weight loss?!?! I have never! EVER heard that it helps lose weight. Cinnamon and Green Tea naturally help break down and regulate blood sugar. I have used those to help lose some water weight and help digest sugar. If it helps her with weight that is awesome, but it is really for the brain chemistry. You really sure get pure 5htp like source natural. It has really saved my relationship. :) my PMS was super bad now it is one day of crying than I am better.
My Mom's a psychologist and she has always advocated a slow reduction of SSRI's to wean off of. How is your doctor not telling you this? These are meds that affect brain chemistry, not antihistamine's. It's foolish and potentially self destructive to treat them as such. A slow weaning off of any anti-depressant when the depression is gone should always be made aware by the doctor prescribing and fundamentally reiterated. Slow wean.. Nothing else. Believe it.
Helena Bonham Carter? Kenneth Branagh as the bad boyfriend. She has battled depression and other mental problems for years.
@Lucas You might want to check out the homeopathic route while you're in transition. My fave reference book is Gillian McKeith's "Food Bible." It lists almost every health concern/disease known to man in alphabetical, and also what to eat and what to avoid to help with the problem. She's a tad bit controversial, but I've used that book more than once with great success!
My Mom's a psychologist and she has always advocated a slow reduction of SSRI's to wean off of. How is your doctor not telling you this? These are meds that affect brain chemistry, not antihistamine's. It's foolish and potentially self destructive to treat them as such. A slow weaning off of any anti-depressant when the depression is gone should always be made aware by the doctor prescribing and fundamentally reiterated. Slow wean.. Nothing else. Believe it.
Lucas I am pretty much in the Udistrict in Seattle. I have farther north but same side of Seattle. There is a dicks on lake city and one on Hollman rd. both are close to me. I haven't had fast food in over 3 years. Even dicks!!!
Kloie- how much are you taking? Sometimes the body can build up an immunity to it. I was taking 50mg and that was not enough. I tried 150mg and that was TO much, I would feel quizzy in the AM. I have been taking 100mg for a year and if I miss a night it is hell the next day.
Lisa Kudrow?
I am further north* lots of typos from my sausage fingers today! Wheat is a slut whore and should be burned at the stake! (Or yeast, whichever whore is making me swell up if I eat her!)
Smash, are you paleo? I swear I talked to someone here who was paleo...
Well, whoever you are, paleo person: I was watching an episode of the US version of Being Human. One character suspects she's been turned into a werewolf. Another character sits by her in the cafeteria, looks at her plate and says, "So that's how you stay so thin! Eating raw meat!" Werewolf character stammers, "Well, um, you know, it's that ... new diet. The paleo diet. You know, eat like a caveman and run from the dinosaurs!" The other character looks dubious and WW character says, "I know, it's a beast. Hey, can I have one of those chips?" Hahaha!
I suffer from depression also - thank you all for the extra info. I'll check with my doc first, but any extra insight is welcome. Love this site!
Izzie- yes I am a paleo nut! I said upthread my hate of wheat and yeast! Since doing paleo now I can't drink without getting violently ill and bread! My delicious soft fluffy bread! Out of the question, I had a BLT yesterday and have been kicking myself since. It makes my hands get swollen! :( I do love a juicey steak! Can't wait for grilling season!
Q- after suffering for 20 years and finding a healthy solution I love to pass it along! :) like I said upthread it works for some people, others can build a natural immunity to it. Some people only need 25-50mg other need 50-125mg. It depends on your brain chemistry. Also, you MUST try it atleast 1 month for results. I felt it within a week but sometimes it takes up to a month.
@Lucas, as others have said, wean off slowly. Also, it's very important that you work with a doctor while doing so--I worked with a (good) psychiatrist to get off SSRIs (after years on them) and she said there can be serious health problems to going off fast.
I know, the *ping* *ping* *ping* feeling is horrible, but it does go away eventually. I got off, it can be done. But I described it as feeling like you're in a dark room with a disco ball/strobe light with people flicking you with their index fingers randomly all over your body.
I'm paleo, too, since last fall. It helped an autoimmune condition I have by about 95%, I lost weight, and I have way less problems with being bipolar and having GAD. I recommend that ANYONE with ANY health issues try it for 30 days and see what happens. (And I'm a former vegan. Go figure.)
Never ever EVER just STOP taking your meds! You HAVE to wean!
Also, I know a LOT about meds and supplements, but I've never even heard of this 5htp stuff. What is it?!
All this paleo talk is fascinating. I bought the book "It Starts with Food" by the people who also advocate the Whole 30. Haven't even read it yet, but want to, as I am horribly "addicted" to sugar.
@Shinobi- my doctor would never recommend I go cold turkey. But that assumes he is aware. I didn't meet with my doctor, I just ran out of my Rx and decided to give adventures in psychopharmacology a whirl. I can picture the look I will get from my doc when I tell him.
Griffonia simplicifolia is what the source natural is derived from. That is also VERY important. The synthetic stuff is crap! Do not try it, I wasted money on trying lots of different types. I wish I could do clicky links on my phone!!!
http://en.m.wikipedia.org/wiki/Griffonia_simplicifolia#section_1
@smash - there's a really great paleo bread that's sold at Whole Foods & New Seasons (or you can buy it online). Of course it's ridiculously expensive but when the sandwich urge won't go away... :) It's gluten-free and low-carb, too.
Julian's Bakery Paleo Bread
Steak, oh my zorks, I have been craving one since I saw this bit of food porn with Gordon Ramsey last week. Mine would be medium instead of that rare, but he gives a really good tip on how to determine if the meat is rare, medium rare or well-done, using the pad of your thumb. Warning: you might drool a little bit.
Gordon Ramsey How To Cook a Steak
@Lucas and Smash - Damn you! I haven't had Dicks hamburgers in two years since moving from Seattle to Phoenix. Sure, I get In & Out now, but Dicks had that greasy quality that you can't beat. There was one in the U District off University en route to the Zoo area and then the notoriously sketchy one off Broadway. Ahhhh, memories! I loved living in the U District. Best part, in my opinion, if you're going to live just outside Seattle. Downtown is too crazy for my taste. But Edmonds was always my second favorite :)
Figgy doing both diet myself and also being a sugar lover I would say Paleo is much easier! :) they do have dessert options like coconut milk pudding, different kinds of crisps and 70% cocoa chocolate is Ok!! That is what saved me. A big hunk of dark chocolate takes away a sugar craving real quick.
@Kloie- I have gained about 50 pounds since I started on the zoloft about three years ago. It is one of the things I hate about it.
Lucas, with certain antidepressants, it can be dangerous going cold turkey. I am on Effexor, if I were to stop now, withdrawal could include seizures. I'd suggest speaking to your doctor so you can taper off the meds.
Yes...I think this is totally Mandy Moore. She seems to be super sweet. I also have heard that she's super duper sensitive.
@Bravura - I've never had Dick's in Seattle, only here in Spokane. Also, one of the funniest evenings of my life was getting burgers from Dick's with my lesbian besties (after a few, well... more than a few, beers) and making all the inappropriate puns in the world.
dont know who it is.
@lucas Hope everything is okay.
Izzie- I was lucky enough to be raised my chefs. :) so I started working in resteraunts at 15. To get a perfect burger medium rare cook it on one side until it it bloody on top, flip it ONCE! And cook for 3-5 more minutes. bAM! I am hungry now! :)
figgy, that book is wonderful! Melissa and Dallas are too cool. Check out Melissa Joulwan's book, WELL-FED, too, as well as her blog, The Clothes Make the Girl. LOVE her!
smash...85% dark here! It's such a lovely treat, isn't it?
Best wishes with whatever you try, Lucas. Finding the right meds/Tx is a sticky wicket, to say the least. Hugs, brother.
Brav- well damn! In and out is WAY better!!
@Lucas - I got off my antidepressant the way RenoBlondie described - 1/2 pill a day for 2 weeks, then 1/2 pill every other day for 2-3 weeks. It helped that things were going really well for me at the time. Good luck with withdrawal!
AKM- I didn't know you were paleo!!! :) yay!!! It kicks ass. I love eating as much as you want with veggies meat. My favorite fix is chocolate and NUTS! The bigger the better I say ;)
I think this is Sarah Michelle Gellar..
Sorry to hijack y'all!!! It is fun to talk health sometimes, which is why I love this blog! You are all so cool and unique, like snowflakes :)
I know a few people on the paleo diet and they say they feel great. It's certainly not for vegetarians! I need to go gluten free, see if it helps my MS, but oh how I love spaghetti, and cake!
smash - GREAT tip for the hamburgers, woohoo.
Msgirl I think paleo would help your MS. I felt like garbage before transitioning. I would wake up grogy and sluggish. Then I would feel puffy and swollen all day. I ate bread last night and my hands are now swollen. :( it will go away. But it takes a few days of not eatting gluten, wheat, yeast.
Mandy Moore is a good guess, although I think Zach Braff would be almost as bad a boyfriend as Wilmer. She gave an interview to People in 2007 where she discussed struggling with depression.
I'm not totally paleo, but I eat mostly paleo-ish. I go to Practical Paleo quite a bit for ideas.
Two recipes I love that help you get a sweet fix:
Primal Fudge
Paleo Breakfast Bread (I add craisins to mine!)
@msgirl - I will try to find the recipe online somewhere (or I can email you the scan if you like), but we make an AWESOME spaghetti squash bolognese that uses the spaghetti squash in place of noodles. It's seriously legit.
I read this as Meg Ryan.
Mandy Moore. Back in the late 1990's/early 2000's, she was being touted as the next Britney/Christina.
I've also heard of her troubles having children with Ryan Adams. Sad! She's one of my favorite celebrities, too. Anyone catch her on Grey's Anatomy? The infamous mass shooting at the hospital? She was a guest star. Her scenes with Chandra Wilson gave me goosebumps.
@Amber, I LOVE spaghetti squash! The rest of the family eats regular pasta, so I get all the squash to myself!
Nom Nom Paleo is a good one, too. Her lettuce wraps are a family favorite.
@msgirl & smash, I have a form of RA. I've been gluten-free and mostly sugar-free for years. Paleo'ish (not totally, I still eat cheese and yoghurt) has really helped with the flares. And I get to have red wine!
@Smash. Thanks for the tips I have "winter depression" if I could regulate that....(wistful smiley). Lucas? Take it easy on yourself, Cold Turkey has Never even sounded pleasant. Why not try "Warm weaning" instead? ; )
Thank you for the link, @Izzie! Bookmarked. :)
Sounds like this one would make a wonderful mother right now! And why would anyone get her pregnant at this time? Irresponsibility at it's finest. Miscarriages happen to most women. It's common. There is no guilt. It's a natural function of the body when things aren't right. No big deal. Get healthier and try again. No need for the drama. Of course, the drama and depression and guilt are better for the medical industry......
@Figgy- LOVE that book!! I'm on my 2nd Whole30 Challenge. It's AMAZING!!
Smash if you crave a BLT just make a BLT salad. Everything but the bread. I use 4 slices of crumbled bacon,one cut up tomato a handful or two of lettuce and a tablespoon of mayo. All of the flavor none of the refined carbs.
Oooo I would love the recipe for spaghetti squash! I know there are gluten-free pastas but they are also made of grain, and too many don't know that too much rice is bad, it becomes sugar in our bodies.
I have cut out most gluten except for occasional pasta and noodles when I order from a Chinese restaurant. But paleo is no grains at all, unlike gluten-free. There's always quinoa and buckwheat which surprisingly is not wheat!
I'm sorry if i phrased that in a way that implied you needed weight loss. She said it was on Dr Oz as a "miracle weight loss product". She only took it for a week or so though. She did say it helped her sleep though.
@msgirl - How should I get it to you? Are you on twitter? You could DM me your email address. I have notes to go along with the recipe, because we've played with it a bunch :)
Amber how do I DM, I don't even know what that is? I don't want to announce my email or FB addy here!
@msgirl - I am @berstreet on twitter. Follow & tweet me, and then I can initiate a DM to you :)
DM = direct message, btw
Thanks for the links amber! Everyday Paleo is another good blog with recipes. My BF is a carb lover! So he eats bread all the time, it is hard not to slip up but I try to resist. My theory is if its not in the house you can't eat it. So I never buy junk food, or try not to!, because I will devour it. Once you open up your receptors for sweets when you ingest sweets it just makes you crave it even worse.
Steampunk- vitamin D helps in the winter. When you are in the sun the body naturally produces it, but in the winter our bodies are lacking it. Tanning beds as unhealthy as they are once a week can help naturally boost the bodies vitamin D. :)
Thanks Amber!
smash - you are so right, I used to have to have sweets every night, then I purposefully didn't buy some and it was hell at first but by the 5th day I didn't miss it at all.
Vit D3 not D2! The drops are the best way to absorb. You should take with K2 which also helps your body absorb.
I used Gluten Free Mommy for sweet treats for my kiddos when they were younger. She doesn't post anymore but all her recipes are there - love the angel food cake!
Are we all on twitter? I'm @ViPblonde_ (had to put the underscore at the end because someone who never tweets got to my moniker first)
@steampunk I have seasonal affective disorder too! Moving to a sunny climate got rid of it for me. Failing that, there is treatment: Light Box SAD
Mandy Moore has been hinted at in blinds before about having several miscarriages.
Dicks Hamburgers are good when you're drinking and/or hung over.
They built a new Dicks, thought it would be South of Seattle but it's North also, in Kenmore/Lynnwood area.
Pugglewug, I'm very happy you know about Effexor's "fun" side.
A friend of mine was on that, then one day at work forgot her morning dose. She knew something was wrong... it felt like electricity was zooming around in her brain. No seizures, but the side-effects were very obvious and strange.
Sorry, Edmonds/Lynnwood, not Kenmore.
Everyone give up on the blind?
There's a really great book that explains the science behind Paleo called "Wheat Belly." I read it before I got into Paleo stuff and it was FASCINATING. Wheat that you and I eat today is COMPLETELY different to wheat that our great-grandparents ate and many people have differing spectrums of sensitivity to wheat/gluten, etc.
I'm not hard-core Paleo at the moment, because I fell off the wagon (and rolled down the frigging hill!), but am trying to get back to it. It take discipline, but I always feel SO much better following the principles of the diet and the weight loss is quick and almost effortless. Gotta get back to it!! (Le sigh).
For all you on the weird dinowhore diet. ;) //eatdrinkpaleo.com.au/under-25-mexican-naked-burrito/. Not sure if this will come out all linky....I'm a technophobe..
I have tried damn near every antidepressant there is. The only one that I didn't gain weight on was Wellbutrin XL. But I wouldn't recommend it for everyone. For the first few weeks it made me horribly sick. I have come to the conclusion that because of my condition my depression and rage issues cannot be treated 100%, so I just try to deal. I give major kudos to my husband for putting up with me cause lord knows its not easy some days.
Good luck to all that struggle and I hope you obtain a happy way of living.
Check out Henry Emmons 'The Chemistry of Joy' and 'The Chemistry of Calm.' I did a three-month mind/body class at his Center, and he also recommends 5-HTP along with Vitamin B, Fish Oil, and other supplements. He's a psychiatrist and knows a shit-ton about brain chemistry.
I weaned off of 10 mg of lexapro over two months time- maybe longer. 10 one day, 7.5 the next. For ten days to two weeks depending. Then ten days of 7.5. Then again 7.5 one day and 5 the next. For two weeks. Until it was 2.5 one day and 0 the next. If I felt I needed longer at any stage, I took it. It was successful and there were no bumps in the process. I think most docs want you to go off much too fast.
Concur. I took triple the time the dr suggested. I just needed to.
@smash- just ordered some source natural 5htp. I've seen you talk about it before but today was the push to try. Thanks!
Thanks for sharing your struggles and successes everyone! I was having a shit day (for no reason) and I love seeing that I'm not alone.
Thanks to all who've shared their stories. Whoooosh...I've been crazy mood-swingy the last few weeks: crying and raging. My situation doesn't help, but I've made up my mind that I can't do anything to change what someone is doing. I can only change how I'm reacting to what they're doing. I've read about 5HTP and had already made up my mind to give it a try and reading this thread has helped to give me the extra push to give it a try.
All the peace and light to all of you!! <3
@Zeeky, the electricity feeling is termed "brain zaps". I ran out once, could not get a hold of my doctor, and ended up missing two days of work. It was absolute hell. I will never try cold turkey. My doctor told me if it were to ever happen again, call the emergency line, due to the rare chance of seizures during withdrawal.
I was a guinea pig for awhile, trying various antidepressants, effexor is the only one that has worked. When we start trying for babies, there is no way I will stop cold turkey, after those two days. Weaning ftw!
I was on various antidepressants for a 4 yr period riight before and after my hysterectomy. Finally got off of them the early part of last year. If not for those pills, I'd have probably been jailed,or put in an institution for bloody murder. My GP, who is awesome, weaned me off over a month's time. The only problem I had was muscle pain, I was on Cymbalta, and it was apparently masking some pretty awful shoulder pain for a while. The worse pill was Lexapro, which turned me into a zombie. I could've cared less if the planet caught fire. That's not really a good mind state, but it's better than the Killabitchcrybaby state I was in before.
I read this as Mandy Moore as well.
Several miscarriages/infertility issues, has been hinted at.
Enty's said before he has a crush on her (as do I, so good taste Enty.)
She seems like she's super nice, has that reputation, but she's also admitted to struggling with depression before.
C+ with A- name recognition who almost hit superstardom - Seems about right.
Awesome rejected!!! Like I said upthread, give it a month but after that I bet you will notice a difference. The sleeping it was really I love! I take it 30 minutes before bed and I am conked out after that.
Jenn I hated Lexapro. Weight gain, indifference, constantly tired, suicidal thoughts; I just wasn't there. Now I take Buproprion and while my emotions still get the better of me sometimes, I like it so much better than the Lexapro. I feel like myself, like I am there, but still under control. I can feel, I can hurt, but the hurt and the darkness is manageable and doesn't seem as menacing as it did before meds and during the Lexapro.
When I went off the Lexapro I wasn't smart about it. I had had enough, I wanted to be done, so I stopped. I have never experienced so much pain before, I felt like I was going to stroke out at any second and had such severe lightening headaches and pains shooting through my body that I would loose my vision, loose my grip, loose speech, just totally loose all physical control.
When I was on Lexapro was also when I hit my rock bottom. I wanted to die, to not exist anymore and I would drink heavily, every single night to accomplish that. The only time I have ever considered suicide was when I was on Lexapro, I just lost the will to live and didn't care who I hurt, or what I did to myself and others. I actually crushed my Lexapro and snorted it and tried to smoke it. Obviously there were other issues going on there, but before I started the meds I had the will to live and valued my life, despite my depression. On the meds, I thought I was worthless, useless, and a waste of a human being. Instead of coming out of the darkness I felt like I was only getting sucked further and further into this sticky black tar that would never let me go, and I didn't want it to let me go. I wanted it to pull me further down and never let me resurface. Thank the flying spaghetti monster I pulled myself together enough to change my life, I honestly don't think I would be here if I hadn't. I changed meds and although alcoholism was still a problem, I wanted to live. I wanted to be here, I was motivated to get up and motivated to keep moving. I cared again.
I am not a doctor but I highly suggest doing tons of research when considering medication. Talk to your doctor, talk to a psychiatrist, talk to everyone you can. When I came to my doctor I only mentioned having anxiety, she didn't even bat an eye before writing a script for the Lexapro. She didn't ask me any questions about how and what I was feeling, she just wrote me off and sent me on my way. I will never make that mistake of letting someone do that again because it almost cost me my life.
Oh bobbi. :) I wish Internet had what my face was doing when I was writing, I didn't think you were saying I need to lose weight. I just haven't heard it helps for that. I did loss weight but that was a combo of running and paleo. But maybe the 5htp has had an affect that way.
JSierra makes an excellent point. Do NOT be afraid to speak up and advocate for yourself! If a doctor suggest X mgs of some med and you think the med might help but you want to try less mgs, speak up. If you want to try something more homeopathic and natural first, speak up. YOU know better than anyone how you feel, and you and your doctors/counselors/whomever should be a TEAM.
Psychotropic meds have literally saved lives, but they CAN have wicked nasty side effects, and I still worry that we may not know everything about the newer ones. Do your research, ask questions, and find what works the best for YOU.
I wish health, happiness, and success to all of the CDANers, especially those of us facing MI (and it seems like there are a lot of us). We're not alone, and help IS out there. Hugs to all.
@ Smash, I take 100 mg of the 5HTP a day. I haven't been taking it very long, though - maybe a week or two.
I've been on various meds since about 1999ish; right now it's Wellbutrin XL (300 mg) & Effexor (75 mg). I was on a higher dose of Effexor last year, but had to drop down because it was making me horrifyingly dizzy all the time, and I already have enough trouble w/vertigo as it is. (I was told by someone at Mass Eye & Ear that I'm an atypical migraineur in that I have headaches not as bad as your usual migraine, but usually "just" vertigo. *sigh* There's theoretically a migraine diet, but considering it's basically everything I eat, well...I don't see that happening, and I'm not convinced it would make a difference.) When I tried to go off the Effexor last spring, my headaches & dizzy spells were so bad that I could barely get around my apartment; fortunately, some of my friends came by to laugh, tell stories, and otherwise keep me sane, bless their fuzzy little hearts. I've found out over the past few years that my depression issues are at least partly genetic (both parents, although they'd never admit to anything other than "being down" and "getting over it"), but there's been a lot of other crap as well. :-( I'm really tempted to start wearing a silver ribbon on my coat or something; apparently that's the mental illness ribbon color, which I learned from reading The Bloggess (aka Jenny Lawson), who's also dealt w/depression, self-injury, etc. People just don't understand that it's not just a matter of "snapping out of it"; it almost literally wears grooves in your brain just like an old record w/the needle left on too long. (Boy, do I feel old using that analogy!) Fortunately, I do have friends who get it, but it definitely sucks, and being unemployed, single, etc. hasn't been helping, although all things considered I'm doing OK right now. One of Jenny's best lines is "depression lies"--it tells you all kinds of horrible things about yourself and other people, and when you're that far down, you tend to believe them. Not to get too drama queen about it, but it's definitely a struggle, and probably one I'll be dealing w/for the rest of my life for some degree; it's a chronic illness, just like some of the other ones I have that I won't bother getting into.
Anyway, *hugs* to everyone reading who's dealt w/these kinds of problems, and I wish I could hug the subject of the blind...hey, Enty, I don't suppose you could point her (if you do in fact know her) towards Jenny's blog, could you? Most of it's funny as hell (google "Beyonce metal chicken"), but there's definitely a serious side written by someone who's Been There and Done that.
Hugs to you robin! Thank you for sharing.
Kloie- you might want to bump it up to 150mg. And taking it before bed is really important. The brain while its sleeping needs to heal. Hugs to you as well!! The dregs of winter do not help!
Longtime lurker, first time poster (Hi Everyone! :::wavy:::) finally coming out because of all the talk about 5HTP.
My beautiful, smart, funny 17 year old daughter has been diagnosed with depression - and after one visit, her therapist recommended an evaluation for antidepressant medications...which I have to say, stunned me. While prescription medications for depression are a lifesaver for some, I personally feel they are used as an option of first resort far too often - and it should only be used as a last resort, particularly with adolescents.
To her credit, the therapist figured out pretty fast that this was not going to be happening unless there were some clear benefits to offset the risk. I think she thought recommending 5HTP was better than nothing...because I made it pretty clear we were not going the prescription med route until all other options came off the table. :o)
Anyway, after a lot of review of the benefits/risks of this kind of supplement, I started her on a low dose of 5HTP and I have to say that it's been very helpful. It doesn't erase the depression, per se (at least I don't see that yet), but it does take enough of an edge off things (at least so far) to allow her to talk about her feelings.
I even started taking it to get a sense of how it might make her "feel" (many report feeling kind of lightheaded/zoned out if the dosage isn't correct) and I have to say that the quality of my sleep has improved drastically after only a week. Could be a placebo effect - but, hey, I'll take it.
So, thanks @Smash for opening this up for discussion!
We now return you to your normal CDAN. :o)
@robin "depression lies"--it tells you all kinds of horrible things about yourself and other people, and when you're that far down, you tend to believe them"
Just read that and it took my breath away.
I understand.
After reading all your posts I don't feel alone struggled with depression for years. As time has gone by I have noticed being menopausal has lessened the depth and length of the dark days. I have been on lorazepam for the past three years, and I have the occasional dark day, but not weeks of hiding and waiting for it to end. Thank you for sharing, and the diet tips I am going to try those. I quit smoking and gained 40 pounds, went into a cycle of self loathing started again but have a new target date.
+1
SSRIs are a bitch. Every single time I've tried an SSRI, it's turned me into an overweight, exhausted zombie. The brain zaps coming off are a bitch, too. I said goodbye for good a few years ago. Now I take Wellbutrin and try to get as much fresh air and exercise as possible. Rainy climate isn't always the best for that, but you do what you gotta do. (I also have a light box on my desk, I don't know if it helps but I like it.)
Welcome Bad Mousie!
Robin thanks for sharing, I hope that we CDANers can provide the same comfort that you guys have given me when I was coming out of the haze. I have seen you here ever since I started actively commenting a little less then a year ago and I never would have guessed at your struggles. Stay strong, a lot of us are feeling the same way that you are, please don't hesitate to vent here. I only hope that I can provide a fraction of the support that you and so many others on here unknowingly gave me. May the force be with you!
RedRonnie I just started up WeightWatchers again and I highly recommend it! Plus, no sign up fee until March 16th. We can all keep each other in check, this site has proved to be such a strong community in the past and a little encouragement goes a long way. I would be more than happy to share point values, recipes, etc for anyone who doesn't think the program is within their financial means, or simply not an option right now. Here's to sexy bikini bodies by June!
Thanks so much everyone for your info....
Anyone out ther have long term experience with Trazodone? Can't sleep without it and wondering if I've set myself up for problems down the road....
Thx!
That sounds so sad. Best wishes to those coping with depression in any form. It can be so frustrating.
As an FYI-I've taken cymbalta and needed to taper off it because it wreaked havoc with my blood pressure. The medical literature doesn't mention this, but even tapering verrrrrry slowly off it can cause "brain zaps." They go away eventually, but are very disconcerting.
In and Out is awesome, don't get me wrong, but there are some things that don't beat the stuff from your hometown. Don't even get me started on the coffee down here. The southwest has nothing on Seattle coffee and the seafood is best left at places near the ocean. I had a hard time getting used to not seeing coffee stands all over the place. What I wouldn't give for a Cafe Umbria out here :(
It's comforting to know that even in a smallish community as this there are so many people who have this in common.
I've dealt with severe depression to the point of agoraphobia. I have taken Effexor, Paxil and currently I'm taking Prozac and Wellbutrin. The Effexor was the most awful medication I've ever taken. I tried a couple of times to get off and got sick, vomiting, zaps, fevers. I finally started daily to open the capsule and take out two beads a day. It took me a couple of months, but the transition was so slow I managed it without side effects.
Smash, we are neighbors! I am at the north end of the udistrict. I avoid dicks, because I prefer my burgers to have real meat.
I took antidepressants on and off for years and weaned myself off of Zoloft a few years ago. When things got too stressful at work and I was having trouble sleeping my doctor prescribed lorazepam, which helped with sleeping at first and then made me twitchy as hell, so I stopped taking that, too, about a year and a half ago.
Right now I try to get as much sleep as possible but I wake up at various times during the night and very rarely sleep a whole night through and I usually wake up tired.
Smash, I am going to try the 5HTP. I don't know why I haven't before. I used to drink to be able to sleep, but that led to drinking for drinkings sake--not good. And it only ever helped me fall asleep, not stay asleep. I don't drink alcohol anymore and I don't smoke weed so to get to sleep I rotate between benedryl, melatonin, or a few other OTC remedies, and if my b/f isn't sleeping with me I need to have some sort of noise to help lull me to sleep (a fan, music, TV).
I don't know if anyone is even still paying attention to this thread, but WARNING! I had been taking Wellbutrin for years following a horrible separation/divorce. It can cause sever damage/breakage to hair and hair loss. It is not on any listed side effect, but I am a a testament to it. My hair was getting so thin on top that I could see my scalp. I went off of it last summary, and I am finally seeing improvement in my hair. I have tons of "baby" hairs now that are growing back in, which is bringing back thickness, and am back to getting complements on how shiny and healthy it looks. My mom also took it, and her hair was breaking almost at the roots. If you google it you can see tons of other people who say it is a side effect. I don't know why they don't list it. I know as a woman, it was devastating to me to be losing my hair. I honestly thought I was going bald. So if your doctor would prescribe it, just be aware of that. It is great for weight loss and sex drive, though. But I'd rather be chubby with hair. Than skinny and bald. No offense to any bald people out there.
Mango I have the same sleep issues, I am going to try that Nyquil Zzzzz hopefully tomorrow and see how that goes. You would think working from 8-5 and jogging 3miles 5 days a week would wear me out, but nope. It takes Grey's Anatomy to finally lull me into snoozeland.
Superstitious this sounds horrible but I am so irritated that I have yet to see the weight loss side of Wellbutrin. Maybe it's because I take Buproprion HCL, the generic version? Meh who knows, but thankfully I have yet to experience the hair loss/breakage *knocks on wood*
I should clarify that, I am irritated because I have been busting my ass to loose the weight I gained from the constant drinking I was doing and have only lost 10lbs so far, 2lbs of that in two weeks.
My diet changed drastically from wine/liquor+mixers every single day, on top of eating complete shit (burritos, chips, spoons and spoons and spoons of peanut butter, pizza rolls, chinese take out, huge bowls of pasta, etc) from 10pm-4am with zero exercise and lying prone on the couch for hours on end, to eating nothing but greens, fruit, protein, and small amounts of carbs, being on my feet the entire time I am at work, and then jogging/power walking 3miles 5 days a week. Also, I drink absolutely nothing but water and coconut milk in my smoothies and skim at dinner. Grrrrrr I don't understand!
Sorry for the food rant, I am just getting frustrated with my lack of progress.
JSierra - I think it is the difference with the generic. When I first started it, it was the brand. I lost 80 pounds. Of course, it was also the worst time of my life, so I'm sure that had to do with it as well. I also have PCOS - which makes you constantly hungry - so for me it just made me have a normal apetite. I ate smaller portions. I evened out, though, once on it for a while and switching to the generic. I've gained a lot back.
I don't think everyone has the hair loss, but it is better to be warned. You will notice the difference when washing your hair. You'll look at your hands and think, "I could make a wig for a small child with all this."
I feel like, as embarassing as it is for me, I should also warn you that it can cause severe constepation. I mean like impaction level constipation.
Don't get nervous about it, just be aware of it in case you see any of those, you'll know what the cause might be. I actually hate that I can't take it anymore. It saved my life. Literally.
My guess for the blind is Hilary Duff.
I also was on Effexor for over 3 yrs. I was up to 300 mg and a complete zombie. When I tried to get off several times, I got the brain zaps so bad I could not work. When I lost my job, I could not afford them anymore. I ended up in bed for 2 months coming off of this. Now I am off of everything and have never felt better. I feel for anyone that has to go through this. It is hell.
Mango my BF is the same. If he does have a few beers he has a tough time falling asleep and staying asleep. He works out, runs atleast 5k everyday for 4 days then 3 off. And he STILL makes me watch tv until he falls asleep. I can just pass out after 30 minutes of silence since taking it. I wish he would! :) but he is a very even keel person he doesn't need to be more mellow.
Bad mousie!! Welcome and awesome! I hate a lot of anger as a teen. Now at 26 it has gone away and I realize I make my life how I want it. :) it is a great feeling. I just got into a new meditational drawing called Zentangle. It is a great stress release, time killer, free expression tool. Your daughter might enjoy that. Thank you for being a wonderful mom and being open to helping her. I didn't have that with my mom. So it makes my heart swell to know you are holding her hand in this tough transitional time. Have a great week!!!
I've never been on anti depressants but I've always read that you have to taper off these meds... same goes for anything that can cause withdrawl.
Hey seachica! The BA (bonapeptite) deluxe burger recipe is the closest I have come to in and out at home. The BA deluxe sauce is what is the clincher. I wish dicks fries were good!!! But they are soggy mush!
I'm about to turn in now (it's 12:15am in Mangoville) and the thing about falling asleep to TV for me is that I have to find something good to watch. I can't fall asleep to crappy TV. Makes no sense, I know. Right now The Closer is on (love Kyra Sedgewick!) but I've seen this one before, like 3 times but it will do.
G'night, friends. :)
This screams Sarah Michelle Gellar to me
Jerry O'Connell being the bad boyfriend decision
Helen Hunt
@superstitutous: take silica and horsetail supplements. It helps strengthen hair and nails.
http://www.puritan.com/silica-582
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