Tuesday, May 07, 2013

Lindsay Lohan Says She Is Straight

Even though Lindsay Lohan does not like labels, she is willing to finally answer the question whether she is bi or straight or a lesbian and she says she is straight and that she was only with Samantha Ronson because Lindsay was lonely and then Samantha controlled her and Lindsay could not leave the relationship because she was basically Samantha's prisoner and that the relationship was toxic and that despite all that she really still loves Samantha and was in love with her but does not want to be with any other women again except to kiss them and to maybe make a porn with them if she can't get her career on track because she is saying to herself that if some barely relevant reality star can get a paycheck that Lindsay has not seen in years that maybe Lindsay should try something like that too and would probably make three or four times what Farrah made. OK, so that last part was not in the Piers Morgan interview she gave, and I don't think Lindsay would make a porn despite the big check because if she did, she would blow through the money and then she would be forced to do more porn.

27 comments:

Jacq said...

So who forced her to stalk Ronson?

Lucas said...

Bet she'd get extra for ass-to-ass.

Bruised Leg said...

If you are bored or lonely sweettart just march right down to the vivid offices. I'm sure they can find a nice transgender person for you to make a video with. Then you won't be lonely anymore or sexually conflicted.

FSP said...

That might have been the longest run-on sentence I've ever seen. Congrats Enties!

Karrots said...

That girl is so messed up on drugs she has no idea who she really is inside.

car54 said...

It says a lot that she chose Piers to bare her soul too. Worst interviewer EVER.

Meanie Reese said...

All I could make out was blah blah ass2ass blah blah... You know, the usual. ;)

libby said...

STOP TALKING ABOUT WHAT I AM COMPLAINING ABOUT. Don't you know who I am? What I like? What about ME?

kidding, all. Sorry I can't ass2ass y'all today. BF on vacation, needs attention.

Patricia said...

She also said she isn't on drugs, doesn't have an alcohol problem, and doesn't understand why all the media attention. She's clearly lying to herself about everything.

Seachica said...

Patricia beat me to it. LiLo claims she has only done coke 4 times, doesn't do drugs and is misunderstood. She is in complete denial.

froggygurl said...

And she never steals only wears other pants

Steampunk Jazz said...

and y'all say she can't act. maybe she can be nominated for a Grammy, cause she sure can sing the blues.

__-__=__ said...

It might be time to hang up blogging when 20% of any post consists of had, has, that, the, and. Good luck!

Diana G said...

That's exactly what I thought @_@

scratchy kitty said...

Uh, she has made a porn already Enty--"The Canyons."
And poor SamRo--imagine how she felt hearing that Blohan basically used her.
And BTW, last but not least and certainly most important of all---SPEED KILLS, Enty! Lay off the Starbucks or the Adderall or the meth or whatever it was that caused you to create the longest run-on sentence in world history. (Though I imagine Lilo probably talks like that, so maybe Enty was just doing a Blohan impersonation?)

Cee Kay said...
This comment has been removed by the author.
Cee Kay said...

I kinda liked the run-on sentence! I believe this is EXACTLY how LL's mind works.

Andy said...

Good Lord that was one illiterate run-on mess of an entry, even by your usual sloppy standards, Enty.

Jennifer H. said...

LOL, you were gettin' all "Witherspoon-y" there for a sec!

Don't you know who I am??? :-P

Jacq said...

@Libby - it's your right as an American citizen!

Nope said...

*eyeroll* Whatever, guys. Anyway, I thought the Ronson relationship was interesting and pretty brave of her. And also toxic and very much an early 20s kinda thing. She didn't try to hide it really, which I thought was kind of cool.

Gayeld said...

Enty, for the love of God, STOP! This is supposed to be our 90 Lindsay free days. Unless she breaks out or kills someone, can't we just enjoy them a bit? At least the first 30 or 45?

Sherry said...

Like I said that was the most amazing piece of fiction ever, that interview. She's probably going through withdrawal in BF right about now.

And SamRo's family tried like hell to get Lohag away from her. SHE was the toxic one, not Sam.

JoElla said...

I was up really late or very early ( you pick) and the late night ABC news said LiLo wanted out of the Betty, and wanted to go to one in Hawaii or Auruba. :facepalm:

Ray said...

@FSP: THANK YOU!

jimmyPx said...

What's interesting is that supposedly she has said in the past that she prefers women to men but men pay her bills.
Truthfully Ronson was the only "real" relationship that she ever had that I can remember.

Also she doesn't do coke but was on the nasty floor in a club in Brazil looking for any coke that dropped down there--no she's not an addict like all of our mothers are virgins.

pickwickianmom said...

I don't know what's wrong with me, but I'm starting to wonder what Lindsay has done that is so bad that she causes such a reaction.

It's like it all started when she got photographed drunk and passed out in that car someone else was driving and wrecked. And then went downhill from there to one after another parole violations for things so minor the court doesn't really deal with them.

Yes, she's probably entitled and horrible to know and certainly to work for. But so is most of Hollywood, I suspect. And many rich trust fund brats. Doesn't Johnny Depp have his own weed island or something? He has all the pirate money in the world to sail off and do drugs and be protected except the one time he fell over in the street.