Monday, June 17, 2013

Nigella Lawson Choked By Her Husband At Dinner - Moves Out

British celebrity chef Nigella Lawson has moved out of the home she shared with her husband Charles Saatchi after he was caught choking her at their favorite restaurant. The couple, who always sits outside so Charles can smoke got into one of their regular arguments and just like he usually does, Charles got violent. The 70 year old grabbed Nigella by the throat as she pleaded with him to stop. Nigella left the restaurant in tears. The couple have been married ten years after her first husband died of cancer. No police report was filed, and the owners of the restaurant are playing dumb like it never happened, but police are investigating. I'm just glad she moved out and she should have moved out years ago.

59 comments:

DontRainOnMyPrada said...

Horrible. I'm so glad that she's getting out...I just hope she *stays* out!!! I have doubt, since she's already put up with this for ten years.... :(

Meanie Rhysie said...

If he could do this in public, I can only imagine wtf he does behind closed doors. Run, Nigella...run like hell and don't look back!!!

Rowan said...

Ms. KillJoy, I thought the same thing when I read the story yesterday. I have complete sympathy for Nigella.

Kelly said...

That is terrifying!

Tempestuous Grape said...

Whoa, that's crazy. I would have stabbed the old man in the cheek. I can't believe how disgusting some men are. I've even more appalled that any woman of any stature would allow someone to treat them that way. I'm glad she moved out.

HannahBanana said...

Jesus, this man has mayjah cojones!!!!! I'm scared of what he does behind closed doors. Run nigella ruuuun!!!! I used to really like her cooking show...so I know he can't be mad about her cuisine!

Unknown said...

this makes me sad because i really like nigella and her shows. i hope she finds peace.

Anonymous said...

you never know what you'll accept or deal with when you're actually in the situation. it probably started small then got worse and worse, and was easier to just let it go and try to move on then make a big fuss and demand that he stop, which she probably wasn't able to do. It's easier to just dry your tears and act like everything's ok than face it, face him and make big changes in your life.

MISCH said...

I'm guessing the onslaught of dementia....

Wendi P said...

Well said, and exactly how it happens.
:-(

__-__=__ said...

And nobody stood up to help her in the restaurant while this was happening. What does it say about society when animals are allowed to harm humans with nobody even dialing 911? Lock the animal up.

DontRainOnMyPrada said...

@misch, i guess its possible, but I think that may be just giving him way too much credit. I think it's more likely that he's been this way all along.

Anon said...

I'm so loving this shit. This will be Sheen in 20 years.

erika said...

i love nigella, ihave her cookbooks, what an elderly douche, if he chokes her in public, what the F does he get away w/ in private. senile F****r!

Susan said...

God, this is so upsetting. I am the BIGGEST Nigella fan (despite her involvement in The Taste, which was an absolute snoozefest, IMO. Ditto for Bourdain) and this is just shocking to me. She always seems so fabulous and happy and carefree. Guess this just goes to show you may think somebody has an envious life, but really, maybe not. She's already been through so much personal turmoil, this just sucks. It's tragic too in that she is so incredibly gorgeous and is with a man who does this shit. Gah...

Anon said...

Oh, he only has one hand around her throat. She must've said something he didn't like.you gotta watch that "old man" strength .

Anon said...

She looks like she's enjoying it actually.

Stellina said...

@Anna nailed it. She may not see it now, but this is a big blessing in disguise for Nigella. Generally, once the truth is out you're free. I can't imagine a reconciliation; she doesn't need him in any way like so many women who eventually give in and return to their abuser. I wish her the best.

Pogue Mahone said...

He even does it in PUBLIC,too,right in front of everyone? He probably thinks he isn't even doing anything wrong. Unbelievable!

Anonymous said...

No excuse. Dementia does not work that way. I've worked in aged mental health as well as domestic violence counselling. This has just made it public.

NomNom83 said...

Sad. This appears to have been an open secret.

I'm glad she's out. I really hope for her and her son's sake, she doesn't go back.

MrsAmiss said...

That's how it happens, I know from experience. Never thought I would end up in one but I did. I came from a good family, great father figures(dad and step dad). I think you kind of are in denial that you find yourself in that position. I got out but tend to fall for controlling men. Don't know why. Hopefully she stays out.

MrsAmiss said...

I know, they could take a picture and not get up off their asses and help???

M52799 said...

No excuse at all but there is some that have Dementia with aggression. My grandmother had it and she was very aggressive and would get physical toward me. Once she tried to hit me with a cane because she felt I stole her remote. This was right before she went into a nursing home. It does exist. It's a long and drawn out disease though. This guy is just an abusive asshole.

sylmarillion said...

The restaurant could at least have kicked him out. I hope she stays out and takes him for everything he's got!

ms_wonderland said...

Nigella married this shit right after her first husband died, with first hubby's approval. Maybe she wanted a father for the kids, or she's the type who needs to be in a relationship. She should have taken some time before committing.

Anyone remember Nigella on the beach in a burkini - a cover-up costume? Could have been covering bruises.

La Descarada said...

I cannot believe the amount of witnesses who easily and openly SPOKE to the press about seeing he incident along with all the details....FAILED TO DO ANYTHING!!!

Gah!! This pisses me off beyond words. Actually the entire situation pisses me off: that she would put up with it that long, that she didnt shank him at the table, that no one intervened, etc.

The one thing I am glad about was that she moved out. Hopefully for good. No one should have to live through something like that. No one.

Unknown said...

In response to no-one doing anything you may want to consider that people were probably in shock seeing such behavior. The patrons were maybe expecting the staff to intervene also. Just a thought.

Freya said...

Love Nigella. Hate the situation she's in.

auntliddy said...

she should have kneed him in the groin and walked out. Anna is prob right; starts small then gets out of hand. asshole.

Count Jerkula said...

No yoke up??? No backhand?? How do you stop the yappin???

joymama said...

What a horrible incident whether by intended abuse or dementia related abuse. That on one intervened on her behalf is scary. There is a picture of him scrunching in her nose!

On the snarky hand, I wonder if he is picking on her recent remake of her face for American television?

If so, perhaps he is a jealous a**hole who does not support her successes.

Go eat a bowl of frosting, Nigella, and stay away from him.

Mango said...

Charles Saatchi is very rich. The restaurant managers probably didn't want to offend a well heeled customer. Jerks.

shopgirl said...

+1 Susan. She seemed to have such a great self-image. I always looked up to her. Hope now she can see the forest for the trees and live a great life on her own!

delete account said...

This is totes why Im not married. I used to want a family so desperately, but its like my grandma always said--you never know what a man is like until you live with him. I've seen soooooo many of my female friends get into relationships with nice wonderful men and then as soon as they said "I do" everything changed. Whats really horrifying about this is that the whole restaurant just watched it and was like, hhhmmm. People never ever want to get involved, theyd rather sit there and watch a murder go down.

Sherry said...

Scratchy Kitty: That's sad that you feel that way. I have been in a few relationships and overall the men have NOT been controlling or abusive. I find men are generally nice and respectful. You deserve happiness in a healthy relationship and I wish it for you. Please believe there are very, very nice guys out there.

Nigella didn't deserve to be physically abused and certainly not in front of anyone. We can only guess how much more he does behind closed doors. And it is sad that no one said a word to stop him. I'm trying to think of how one would do that. You always fear the person abused will turn around and tell you to mind your own business. Just glad police are investigating.

8====D KermitGossnellKnobjob said...

She is cute, he is old (70 freaking years! Almost doubling her age), he beats her up...
She has to be a gold digger or he must have some great things inside (huge dick or something) for her to have suffered so many years with that dipshit.

Count Jerkula said...

@scratchkitty: the problem with getting involved is that 90% of the time the chick is not going to be thankful. Instead she will tell the cops her and her man were having a quiet lunch until you burst in out of nowhere and started a confrontation. Just like drug addicts needing to want to quit, the responsibility is on her her get up and leave the table.

Count Jerkula said...

@scratchkitty: the problem with getting involved is that 90% of the time the chick is not going to be thankful. Instead she will tell the cops her and her man were having a quiet lunch until you burst in out of nowhere and started a confrontation. Just like drug addicts needing to want to quit, the responsibility is on her her get up and leave the table.

NaughtyNurse said...

Personally, I would like to know the name and location of the restaurant that is trying to protect their "image" from this situation so I can never go there.

Stature and socioeconomic level have nothing to do with finding yourself with an abusive spouse. It happens slowly, insidiously, after you have been mentally worn down and are feeling bad about yourself. One day he gets rough, and you are so embarrassed that you hide it and make an excuse for it. Then it happens again...and so on. Having a career and a support network makes it easier to get out...yes...but it does not keep a woman from being a target.

Andrea said...

Nigella is not a gold digger!She's an Oxford educated heiress and daughter of a life peer. She had a successful career as a journalist and TV chef long before she married Saatchi.
Does Saatchi have a history of violence? If not, the dementia aspect may be true.
Also I'd like to echo NaughtyNurses sentiments in the post above mine.

ForSure said...

So many thoughts on this...

First, I hope Nigella stays out. Both her son and her daughter have probably witnessed this behavior for years, who knows what this has taught them. Hopefully, if she leaves for good it will be the best lesson for both of her children.

I read a lot of British press about this story yesterday. It seems Nigella admitted recently that her mother was abusive and that as a child she would just stand silently and take it until her mother's mood passed. Perhaps this has something to do with her tolerance of Saatchi's behavior.

As for why no one intervened... please, I don't think anyone here would have said anything either. He was choking her with both hands in some of the photos, they were arguing, according to witnesses. He is a big man, she is a celebrity, they were at a famous, well heeled restaurant. Besides the disbelief that this scene is playing out right in front of you, there is the fear that either one of them would turn on a 3rd party that keeps people from intervening in a situation like that. This is common behavior, to the point that sociologists have a name for it (which I cannot remember). I am a little bit surprised that no one spoke to her after he left, but it's probably because she is a celebrity and they were just incredibly uncomfortable because of that. I love Nigella to death, but I am not sure what I would have done in that situation (and I've stuck my foot in a number of places do to my own misguided sense of indignation).

I really really really hope she stays away, but I will not be surprised if she goes back. Such a sad situation.

car54 said...

I feel so sorry for her that this happened in public, but I suspect it is a good thing it did--if it had happened privately (which it might have) she might not have taken action to get out. With it being so public, she did what she needed to do to remove herself and her son from that situation.

I like her a lot and she seems like such a sweet, mild mannered person on her programs, I hate the thought of anyone treating her this way.

Susan said...

Nigella was born and bred with hard-core cash so there's no way in hell she's a gold digger. Plus, she's made a fortune on her own with her cookbooks, TV shows and cooking line of products. Isn't she one of the most well-known celebs in Britain?

FS - I agree with you 100 percent. It's so hard to know how you would react if witnessing this situation.

Honestly, I've been a fan of hers for a million years. My husband gave me her book, "How to Be a Domestic Goddess," for Valentine's Day when we were young lads dating. Hee. I know many of you may be like, that is the lamest gift ever, but I am obsessed with Nigella and all things cooking. I seriously read cookbooks like novels, and she is such a fabulous writer. I really would love to meet her one day. I would totally throw a dinner party for her, Jon Bon Jovi an Isaac Mizrahi. Off to daydream....

Snapdragon said...

Did anyone see his lame-ass public statement about this?:

About a week ago, we were sitting outside a restaurant having an intense debate about the children, and I held Nigella’s neck repeatedly while attempting to emphasise my point.

There was no grip, it was a playful tiff. The pictures are horrific but give a far more drastic and violent impression of what took place. Nigella’s tears were because we both hate arguing, not because she had been hurt.

We had made up by the time we were home.


Sounds like bullshit to me. She looks fucking TERRIFIED in those pictures. And if your go-to place to emphasize a point is to GRIP SOMEONE'S THROAT? Sorry, you are a bag of dicks, Mr Saatchi. Don't care how rich you are.

As for the restaurant, the same article says:

A spokesperson for Scott's said: "The staff and management at Scott's are aware of the reports in the media and would like to make it clear that they did not see the alleged incident nor were they alerted to it at the time."

Snapdragon said...

Also, Nigella Lawson is 53. Her husband is not nearly double her age.

Susan said...

Snapdragon - Yeah, I saw all the pics and read the British articles. She looks terrified. And I was SHOCKED to see her so upset and clearly crying. I always thought she was all about her image. Were the pics shot by paps?

feraltart said...

As shocking as it is that no-one intervened, the photos meant that it could not be denied. A man who rushed to the aid of a woman being beaten here in Australia was murdered by the abuser. I would definitely ring the authorities, but not intervene myself. Also, a lot of abused people are too petrified to side with the rescuer & will side with the abuser.
Just with cheating, no abuse, I have a friend who didn't want to know & pines for the arsehole 14 years later. Sometimes you can't help other people.

Sherry said...

Absolutely to all that said intervention can be a dicey proposition. In the US when the police answer to a domestic situation both parties are now taken in to discern between abused, abuser. No guarantee that the abused won't defend or drop charges against the abuser.

digal704 said...

I am surprised, yet not , at the tameness of the reporting of this story as well as the comments. However, when speaking of Chris and Rhianna they are called disgusting and all kinds of horrible names. Wow.

Jessie said...

Her first husband pretty much set these two up. It's sad that it has turned out like this but I'm glad she's left him.

FlirtyChick74 said...

I'm truly heartbroken for her and all that she's gone through. The fact that it happened in public and no one helped makes it even worse and she must be feeling utterly alone and embarrassed. If I could give her a hug, I would.

The British press is something else. I read that one paper did a play on words and called her artichoked. Another one made cooking references. SMH.

summary of articles

anon said...

This is so sad. Could this be a reveal? I remember a recent blind about a cooking show and a wife beater

Jenn said...

This type of guy doesn't change. I lived with that crap growing up. My old man is exactly the same, just more vulnerable now that he's old. It's tempting. A shove down the stairs etc. This is why I don't see him at all. I'm a good person, but I ain't perfect.

Jaxxxy said...

About people not intervening: three of my neighbours listened to me screaming while my then-husband was beating, raping and trying to kill me. I was screaming for my life for almost an hour. Two of the couples did nothing, while the third finally called the police. They didn't come to my aid though. They just listened and waited for the police. Afterwards I asked the one couple why they didn't do anything. Their answer: oh you know, it's better to mind your own business.

That's people for you...

Susan said...

Jaxxy - that is terrible. My husband called the cops on neighbors during a domestic. He thought better safe than sorry. I hope you're not in that situation any longer.

Snapdragon said...

@Susan -- yes, I think it was paps taking the pics.

@Jaxxxy -- UGH, I am so sorry...

Pini 27 said...

Once again this is an example of Enty's two second perusal of an item and then reporting on it. She didn't move out, she took a suitcase and left by taxi with her son. Her husband said he told her to get away for a bit to avoid the media scrutiny. Her moving out would be a truck loading crap up.

"Dementia" seriously? You know, wealthy, highly educated men can be abusive pricks too. They have a history of an "volatile" relationship and he put his hands on her throat several times during this "discussion".

I have an issue with the fact that she has exposed her children to this type of interaction and they may now think that such "passionate" interaction is part of a relationship. Her Mother abused her and I guess whatever therapy she had afterwards wasn't enough. What a sad, disgusting story.

Jaxxxy said...

Tx guys. Nope, after that evening I couldn't be in denial about him any longer. Kicked him outta the house and only dropped the charges to get him outta the country. I'm in a loving caring healthy relationship now. Which is what I wish for Nigella. Denial can only get you so far - she needs to be tough now and kick his sad arse out of her life.

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