Thursday, October 31, 2013

Chris Brown Will Be In Rehab For Three Months - All Charges Might Be Dropped

Apparently Chris Brown's "anger" issues are going to need three months to get straight. All the tabloids have finally figured out what I have told you the past few days about Chris Brown escaping the mandatory drug testing after his arrest while his co-defendant wasn't so lucky. This is why you get special treatment if you are rich or a celebrity. Combine the two and probably nothing will happen to you. Chris is hiding out in rehab until the coast is clear and he won't test dirty. I don't think he cares about getting sober. What he cares about is keeping his butt out of jail and not being available for people from the probation department is a great way to do just that. When he finally emerges and gets tested he will be clean. At the same time he will tell the world he dealt with his anger problem head on and when he gets out Kneepads will be right there waiting for him with a cover about how he has changed.

There is some talk that Chris is going to walk away from all the charges and throw his bodyguard under the bus. Chris would still stay in rehab though until he gets clean for a test.

34 comments:

The Fox said...

Bay-budabud-dum-bam

Beetlejuice said...

*That* is why I won't do two shows a night anymore, I won't.

Jack S said...

Q: Why is a skeleton so mean?


A: He doesn't have a heart.

Regan MacNeil said...

I need you, Chris Brown. We got special work to do here, you and me

ConfirmationStation said...

What do you call two witches living together?

Broom-mates!!!!!

The Fox said...

Mama-dum-day-do

Regan MacNeil said...

A true warrior needs no eyes

Beetlejuice said...

I call that a good time

Burn Book said...

Oh, look, the new Enty was right about something that everyone else in the world had already guessed. Congratulations, New Enty!

Wooooooooo

The Fox said...

Abay-ba-da bum-bum bay-do

Paint Chips said...

I suppose it's better than nothing. Stay tuned to see if he can make the three months without making a spectacle of himself.

Jack S said...

Q: What do vampires take when they are sick?


A: Coffin drops!

Anonymous said...
This comment has been removed by the author.
Robert said...

His problem isn't that he has "anger management" issues. His problem is that he is a spoiled, self-entitled a$$hole, and no amount of rehab's going to change that. The "rehab" charade probably will keep him out of jail, though since he's rich and a celebrity, there's little likelihood that any southern California court would've sent him there anyway.

Numbskull said...

@Freddty, but look at Beaker's eyes

surfer said...

Except Enty, you're forgetting that he met with his probation officer as soon as he got back to L.A. So much for avoiding him.

His motives for running off to rehab are beyond transparent, and I hope you're wrong and the judge sees through this.

Regan MacNeil said...

Ninja warriors have calm

AJ said...

How effective is rehab for 'anger management' ?
It sounds like his people are pretty smart and took control before the judge could throw the book at him.

Himmmm said...

Ryan Fuckhead Oneal. And if there's a hell - they have a special suite awaiting him. Not just for this, but for the HELL he's caused me and so many others. I'll not name his victims, but his filmography and dating history should show that clearly. I learned to let the hate out of my heart many years ago, but some people deserve to reap what they sow. Ryan Oneal is the fucking antichrist. I know, believe me.
When you manage to piss off Steven Speilberg, Aaron Spelling, Tippi Hedren, Brian Depalma, Robert Evans, Charlie Bludhorn, Lew Wasserman, and about 90% of the then-powerful William Morris Agency? You're career is fucked.
The "teen" in the blind is NOT a teen today. The perp IS Ryan O'Neal. Somehow, he still gets TV work. Amazing.
and FYI - Ryan's "peak" was in the late 70s through the late 80s folks.

Cleodacat said...

I thought CB had a valid MJ medical card issued by the state of CA. Wasn't that how he got off last time he was dirty?

ProfBraaaaaains said...

I think what you "mean" is that Chris "Brown" might not "make it back" in a way you are "comfortable" with. He may not be the "A++++" singer we all "expect" him to be

av control said...

@jack s: thanks for the early morning halloween jokes/laughs.

cb looks like a younger version of so many lost souls i have to dodge on the streets of san fran's tenderloin district - talking to themselves, searching the sidewalks for loose rocks. he's got the look down. hope he can shake it off...

ProfBraaaaaains said...

Worst

ProfBraaaaaains said...

"O"

ProfBraaaaaains said...

Face

ProfBraaaaaains said...

Ever

Numbskull said...

@Himmmm, trust me, there's a hell. I live there.

Him said...

Dun dun DUNNNN!!

Nicotina said...

Chris Brown scares me.

Anonymous said...

I have this need to shove myself in his mouth until he chokes.

CarrieGraceMoretzbetches said...

I want to set his bitch ass on fire, I can and I will.

car54 said...

I wonder if Oprah will pay him a million after he gets out of asshole rehab.

Anonymous said...

I like turtles

di butler said...

Calling it, Breezy's got a serious case of the Faces of Meth. Now, doesn't that make this all seem so much better? Angry ass boil on tweak. Jesus.

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