Monday, November 18, 2013

Justin Bieber Had Sex With A Brazilian Porn Star

Taught from a young age to always go for the hookers, Justin Bieber did just that on his recent South American concert tour. He was taught that hookers always come with condoms and that they won't spill the beans about who they were with and what you were like. I think Justin is going to discover that much of what he assumed to be true in the US is not even close to being true in South America. Most of the hookers he had sex with have talked about him.

One of the hookers even filmed him in bed. It turns out the Brazilian hooker who has garnered international fame is no stranger to cameras because she is also a porn star. Shocker I know. The other shocker is that she is telling people that she did not use a condom with Bieber. Yeah, so ladies you might want to be real careful before you go exploring the hairless one. Most of the porn star HIV cases have some kind of connection to Brazilian porn. So, that is some other potentially good news for those of you wanting to have sex with Justin.

37 comments:

Erin said...

eew

aemish said...

*hurl*

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Harry Knuckles said...

Dead man walking.

Bacon Ranch said...

Those boobs look fake. Like throw a dart at the fair and win a prize fake.

Who is shocked that he's an idiot? He's not even smart enough to hire intelligent people to think for him.

27 club..plan ahead.

FrenchGirl said...

i just hope he uses condoms

Bacon Ranch said...

...speaking of not being smart enough to hire spam filters..

WTF Temple person?

At least give me a legit number to call.

MontanaMarriott said...

I still say she is a post op transexual

MISCH said...

I swear his dick is going to turn black and fall off…..gross

Mari said...

I'm going to sound awful here, but...
I keep going back and forth on that idea, Montana. On the one hand... Her appearance. On the other hand... Brazillian cosmetic surgeons have the reputation of excellence, so... Her appearance. I suppose it's a case of the starting gate determining the finish line. ;)

Kelly said...

She's thick.

trainrides said...

On a more positive note, Bieber has joined other celebrities who are now helping the Haiyan relief efforts.

Dirty Red Pagan said...

By fucking them?

Patty said...

Dear Dr Temple,
You may want to hire better spam writers. Ones that will make it sound a little more, oh I don't know, like regular English. You may want to reach out to some Nigerians who need to transfer their funds to a US bank account. They sound like they could use some help too.


PATTY
USA

plokzy said...

Ok seriously, she's a BRAZILIAN porn star. All of us would literally kill for that chance, even more one that looks like that (those hips...)

GET IT, BIEBS!!

Anothergrayhare said...

laughing @Patty

Sherry said...

Excellent Patty. I always wonder who actually answers these emails. I do legitimate ones all day long and I never get a reply.

Beiber's an idiot everyone knows that.

Mila said...

I'd like to see the studies that show that "Most of the porn star HIV cases have some kind of connection to Brazilian porn".

selenakyle said...

Damn, she's got some thighs on her, huh? Would prolly break that poor lil' twig in half!

D Brown said...

Mila

You can start by Googling Lara Roxx.

DontRainOnMyPrada said...

Isn't this story a day late and a dollar short? By the way it's doubtful that penetration occurred, so the risk of transmission was probably pretty low...

Count Jerkula said...

This is old. She tweeted a pic of a stack of 100's w/ something like "Thank you Justin". I think saw that on a porn site like 2 weeks ago.

So much for not liking curvy women. Of course he may just like curvy whores and wants keepers to be lean.

Anna Katherine Nonymous said...

I dont care about a kids sex life. None of my bizness

cece said...

Ugh. Those look like my thighs. *sigh*

NapAssasin said...

You are an amazing writer. May I suggest forwarding your shining examples in literary excellence to the New York Times for review? I'm sure Dr. Abracadabra would give you a glowing reference.

ms snarky said...

@Patty .....+234 is the country code for Nigeria. Those poor folks just can't get their money out of that country.

plokzy said...

That's a good thing

Unknown said...

Couldn't they find a picture of her with her strapon?

Unknown said...

What parent would allow a kid to download or listen to the turds music? I don't get who is going to see him in concert or how he's making any money from his you tube career. Seriously he's disgusting. I can't believe a parent would suffer through his music or bring a kid to his concerts - who are these people?

Steampunk Jazz said...

I went back and looked after reading your comments, @Montana, I think your right. S he has got to be a post open. Check out the stomach's muscle structure, the shape of the upper arm and the V of the pelvic area :-) . Once you discount the screw on tits, her frame is very " young male".
@mary, maybe s he went to a cheap plastic surgical clinic.

Steampunk Jazz said...

I went back and looked after reading your comments, @Montana, I think your right. S he has got to be a post open. Check out the stomach's muscle structure, the shape of the upper arm and the V of the pelvic area :-) . Once you discount the screw on tits, her frame is very " young male".
@mary, maybe s he went to a cheap plastic surgical clinic.

Anonymous said...

Beibers sex life is none of my biz, but he should use a condom...ALWAYS.

He gets (or can get) more action than the typical (non famous) young lad and he should b careful.

bellaluna said...

Who (what?) would want to have sex with that pre-pubescent-looking brat?

SueRH said...

Why would you want him back after that?

Aoife said...

@DontRainOnMyPrada

Day-um!

Alita said...

That makes no sense, @NapAssasin, why PAMELA is as American as apple pie! Didn't you see the 'USA' in her signature?

《 confused :( 》

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BARBARA from USA

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