Sunday, December 08, 2013

Blind Items Revealed

April 24, 2008

#2 - This used to be B list actor on a hit comedy network show is now C list and hopefully fading fast. BIG dater this guy. Decided that he wanted to give the ladies a little something extra and so had a piercing inserted into a place that 99.999999999999999% of guys would say no thanks. Since he got it installed (is that the right word?) it has just been one big infection, and numerous trips to the doctor. Needless to say, unless his plan included giving the ladies a pus infected mess, he probably ain't getting any for a very long time.

Wilmer Valderrama

79 comments:

Ms Cool said...

Good God.

auntliddy said...

Hope it fell off so he cant continue his douchery ways.

fancyscreenname said...

I'm okay with this.

His penis being an infected mess, that is.

Seven of Eleven said...

Something extra from Wilmer?

TalksTooMuch said...

A Prince Albert is kind of confusing to figure out from the other perspective. I remember sort of circling it trying to suss out the safest point of contact. Should not be attempted whilst extremely drunk the first time

Eloise said...

I assumed Wilmer gave the ladies a pus infected mess without a piercing.

fancyscreenname said...

^5@Eloise

dawn bee said...

Just... No. I did not need to know this.

Rach Around said...

Here's hoping it becomes necrotic & drops off.

RangersGirl said...

AHAHAHAHAHAHAAAAHAAAAAAA!!! This made my day!!!! Karma is a bitch!!!!

Wendy Davis said...

God stop trying to be cool. There is no such thing as a cool late thirties chubby mom. You are embarrassing yourself luv.

Derek Harvey said...

I'm sure Franco would still do him

TalksTooMuch said...

Um, Wendy, fir the record, I am 40, NOT late 30s! Mayne if I was younger I would understand why people want to insert so many metal pieces into their bodies

Derek Harvey said...

I am always on the computer and you can not see whom addresses whom on the computer--enty fix that asap please. SOOO Wendy suck my prince-albert ohhzy gohhzy dick bitch---
I wasn't sure if chubby mom was a prince albert nickname that only cool kids use and I was hesitant to jump in at first lol

Unknown B said...

Wendy Davis folks, the biggest cunt here. Back for your monthly shit drop BITCH?

Harlow17 said...

and this is why i don't understand crotch piercings. not the cutest place to have a raging infection. but obviously he deserves this

TalksTooMuch said...

No, Derek, I would be the chubby mom in question, but I kinda like the fact it could be used as code for a pierced penis

Derek Harvey said...

what a rude bitch---just ignore her! I think you look really pretty in that pic and its not like your kid reads this site

Lucas said...

@Wendy - maybe she just IS cool and isn't pretending to be anything. Kind of like how you don't have to pretend to be bitchy.

Bacon Ranch said...

RangersGirl beat me to it:
HAHAHAHAHAHAHA Suck it Wilmer (just don't expect anyone else to do it)

Though this was 5 years ago and with all Dr.s can do, he's probably fine now :(

Seven of Eleven said...

@Wendy Davis: there's no such thing as a cool judgmental jealous mom who uses her real name, "luv".

Sugar said...

Haters gonna hate, TTM. Wendy is a jealous Prince Albert puss infected mess.

Meanie Rhysie said...

Hey Wendy...so nice of you to drop in and spread your particular brand of misery. Not! Haggy ol' cunt.

TalksTooMuch said...

Thanks, Derek, that's really nice! She's an angry, unhappy lady, and I get that. I WISH my kids could read, we're still at the sounding out letters stage. One day!

TalksTooMuch said...

I don't pretend to be anything other than what I am, chubby 40-year-old mom fits pretty well, so no worries. But I wasn't always, you know, people shouldn't ever assume soccer moms started out that way. She's got a lot of hate. But when did "mom" become a pejorative??

Sis said...

@ Talks...ignore the negative comments ... you look fantastic for forty and your child is a cutie....

I, for one, would have loved to have watched you trying to unlock, unhook, undo, a metal anything(?), from a mans privates, lol, there would have been much laughing involved and most likely more alcohol, of course, maybe some picture too!

From a woman in her 50's with a warped sense of humor and I'm a REAL chubby woman.

Rach Around said...

TTM: take it as a compliment : you don't look your age, you're not chubby and Wendy is just spreading her vitriol because people here like you and she's jealous.

Rach Around said...

I'm still young(ish) & I've never encountered a dick piercing sexually, but seen them done. Just shows that mums have lived lives before settling down & having kids.
Wendy, you really do expose yourself to be a dad cunt & I almost feel bad for you.

TalksTooMuch said...

Sis, thanks, chubby represent! And it was just so strange! It had like an earring backing, I don't know if that's normal, but looked so uncomfortable! For both of us! This was a looong time ago.

lesbianeatwhat said...

vagina/penis peircings are such a turn off to me. Just no. I have walked away from hot chicks bragging about their clit rings, i didnt need the visual. @TTM trolls gona troll, you look cute for any age!

Rach Around said...

TTM; serious question : did it snag on anything?

Jennabean said...

@TTM I've seen two and both were just a bar going thru the peen. But your right the first time you see one you kinda rethink your approach lol

Jennabean said...

And I'm a 30 year old chubby mom so I guess we still can do things. Who woulda thought?

TalksTooMuch said...

Thanks, Rach, but I am chubby, and am okay with it. I do my best to keep healthy, doesn't always translate to slender.

Tru Leigh said...

I call that karma.

Seven of Eleven said...

@lesbian, I've always wondered what's the point of genital piercings. Do they change sensations in some way, or is it for show? I wanted to get an eyebrow piercing but decided I'm not up for that kind of commitment - it's enough to maintain metal allergy in earrings, I can't imagine an infected eyebrow, much less... well, yeah.

Rach Around said...

TTM : you have kids, you look great, you've got a rad sense of humour & unlike some here, guessing you've got a great life waiting for you when you're not at the keyboard.

Count Jerkula said...

I would never get a Prince Albert. No way I'm putting anything in there that will affect my ability to aim my pee or pee standing up.

I would consider getting some of those stainless steel ball bearings implanted if I was committed to a broad who wanted some extra stimulation.

Amazing the lengths people will go to replicate genital warts, huh??

Rach Around said...

Seven: my friends who are tattooists and piercers cla they enhance sexual experience, but having observed a dick and 2 clit piercings, I crossed my legs and felt my eyes water. My BFF from Uni had her clit stud removed because it kept causing infections, swelling and a lot of pain. Now she claims it's numb down there. I keep my metal on my face!

Count Jerkula said...

@seven: Clit hood piercings do serve a purpose. Ladies with tiny clits get the vertical barbell and ladies with more pronounced clits get a door knocker hoop. Both increase the stimulation.

I don't understand a chick piercing her taint. I have seen it in pics a couple times. Seen a pierced pucker a time or 2 also. I don't know how you make it through that w/o infection.

Sis said...

I've had a fish hook stuck right above my eyebrow, does that count?

My sisters and I were in a fishing tournament, yes, we are all hoping to win the $50,000 fish or at least a tagged one. I was laughing, my sister who was trying to get it unstuck was trying not to laugh and this was only two years ago.

And we're all moms too!

Oh yea, and I know the persons who thought me uncool would be my own teenage sons, accompanied with an exaggerated eyeroll, please.












Mary Brian said...

what a dumb bastard.... lol

sandybrook said...

As I said the other day when Talks Too Much pic was published--she is cute! Wendy go suck some ass!

FS said...

TTM, you are a lovely, friendly, tolerant, patient, confidant woman (in this forum) and some women can't stand that. Just keep rockin' yourself and ignore the haters. :)

Kristin said...

And here I thought this thread had 44 comments bc everyone is sharing pee-hole infection stories. But no! Some bitch tried to put @TalksTooMuch in the corner. You're like the Gary Sinise of CDAN.

Ignore that trash box.

Bravura said...

I had one experience with a prince Albert and it wasn't enjoyable at all. I kept worrying the entire time the condom would rip and it wasn't anything to write home about. It was a turn off to say the least. The guy had no other piercings or tattoos so why he decided of all things to get that done, Ive no clue.

Brenda L said...

well I was fired up ready to defend TTM, but I see you guys have it all covered. Good job.

I had a young whippersnapper ask me once why I was at a concert...because yeah, you people below 30 invented rock and roll, right?

Sherry said...

I'll stand in TTM's defense as well. Just because she mentioned the experience at this juncture doesn't mean it happened last night. We were all young once and some of us had a lot of fun (read: experience). Nothing wrong with sharing it later on. I'm sure Wendy is the vision of youthful beauty who will never, ever age or be "uncool".

Count I would think the ball bearings (is that correct spelling?) inserted would cause more problems that a Prince Albert. Ugh. Don't hurt Mr. Penis ever!

And Wilmer is a big pus infected dick.

TalksTooMuch said...

Thanks, you guys! I hope Wendy has some more wine and feels better.

marie-ski said...

Fuck wendy, she's just mad cuz that was hilarious!

Count Jerkula said...

@Sherry: Nah. Lil slice, then they pop in a sterilized, stainless ball bearing, they make stuff out of silicone too, I think. No long term healing like a piercing. Couple days with a band aid, maybe some stitches.

Google image search "genital beading"

CanadianMiss said...

@TTM. I'm assuming you didn't have a tongue piercing? That story may have had a tragic ending... :)

TalksTooMuch said...

Sparks flying in ALL the wrong ways! No, no interesting piercings or me whatsoever. Just ears.

I know a woman who had the beads inserted under her skin, she keloided really badly and her body rejected it. And that was on her collarbone, I can't inagine what it would be like it that happened in the goodies

Gary T. Burnaska said...

What does DEMI LOVATO see in this tool? I find this story to be just too freaking hilarious. DUDES please to not mess with your own dong. Maybe He needs to do one of those Celeb awareness campaigns.

Kristin said...

@TTM You feeling the love? Gone are the days when readers were assigned days to eff with other readers.

Now you can be told you're pretty and complimented on your oral skills all in one place. :p Such is the circle of life.

NaughtyNurse said...

Back when I was smoking' hot and not a somewhat chubby-yet-still-hot 40-something year old mom, I got my belly button pierced. Thought it would look good decorating my rock hard abs. Worst mistake I ever made. That thing was always inflamed or infected. Didn't get it out fast enough, and I still have the remnants of that stupid hole in my belly.

RowdyRodimus said...

Wendy, you stupid, obviously hipster cunt. Yous should know you don't attack one of our own just like we wouldn't go to your Apple Bar and try to explain you can get better equipment for a much better price by not not buying anything Steve Jobs saw in a store and then added the I prefix to.

You ESPECIALLY don't fuck with Talks Too Much. To paraphrase Liam Neison, I have a set of skills that would cause you pain seven ways and death in three depending on how I did them. Would you like pieces of your sternum coming up with every breath you take? Do you like being able to move without using your breath to control a wheelchair?

Just remember Steven Hawking and how glad you aren't in that shape yet the next time you want to be a shit on this site.

Pip said...

Wendy is a miserable person who makes her daughter's life hell by being a bigoted cunt. I hope when your daughter leaves the nest, she chops her hair off, becomes an atheist, and befriends tons of gays and lesbian.

Hammer_Girl said...

And the final score
TTM-8(including myself)
Wendy-???? You ain't got to leave but you can't stay here, get to stepping bitch

Renoblondee said...

And Wendy shows up again to be a horrible person. Got your back too @TalksTooMuch, you cute, funny lady, you!

TalksTooMuch said...

Thanks, Reno and Hammer. V glad to see you aboot, Rowdy

NaughtyNurse said...

TTM, I've been here a long time. The best strategy is to completely ignore the ignoramuses.

AD said...

Ha! I dated a very similar dude!! I made him take it out

RowdyRodimus said...

I heard from a little birdie you were worried after my comment earlier in the week, Talks. It just worked out that my brother messed up his leg somehow so I've been taking care of him, then we got snowed in (in fact the pipe to our septic tank is frozen, going outside in 30 degree and less temp to use the bathroom SUCKS lol) and the reason I was kind of down that day was the fact that today is the one year anniversary of my Mom passing, so I had that on my mind.

Its just U said...

Oh Wendy, just coz nobody wants to stick their junk in your trunk doesn't mean you should be a bitch.
Hey TTM, us mamas know what's up. Usually our man's bits looking at our fine, Big, round asses.
I'm late 30's, SAHM and I am a freaky bitch.
You don't have to retire your personality when you hit 30.
Then again, Wendy, you gotta have a personality in the first place.

Its just U said...

Oh, and I'm a big girl. Big everything. I really can fill a space. And I know my freak flag is better because of it.

marie-ski said...

STOP IT! I'm swooning over here, call me sick
but you got my juices flowin.
GoRowdy!

TalksTooMuch said...

There you go, that makes way more sense, Jennabean! Remember, extremely drunk was part of the occasion.

TalksTooMuch said...

I know, right? And I bet the single ones of us (unlike moi) date and everything! Thanks FS, Reno, Jennabean, ItsJustU, Seven and Brenda. And Kristin, I think...why anyone would get their panties in a bunch about a middle-aged chubby mom is beyond me.

TalksTooMuch said...

Glad to see you back,, I knew this was a tough time of year for you so I just wanted to see if you were otay.

JSierra said...

Oh boy what a busy day! Looks like Wenty got the clicks they were looking for. At least you know everyone likes you TTM! And at least you know not to take the haterade too seriously, it's weird but for some reason online burns hurt so much more than real life ones it seems like.

Leo said...

Burrrnnnnnn ladies

TalksTooMuch said...

No doubt, JSierra. I remember when I first started commenting I got smacked down pretty hard by a regular and it bothered me for MONTHS. I think Wendy has a history of messing with people and being pretty aggressive, though, and it was so random and out of the blue.

CUNextTuesday said...

Once a cunt always a cunt. Drop dead Wendy do the world a favor.

Kristin said...

That's one thing that's changed on this site for the better, non? I went back and read some of the comments from a few years back and forgot how vicious people were.

Kristin said...

*some people

Not cherub-faced angels like you TTM. ;)

Gayeld said...

Is it that time of the month again, already?

TalksTooMuch said...

I dunno, Kristin, I bet there's more than a few on here that yearn for the mean girls reign of the past. It's always evolving, right?

di butler said...

Windy Wendy back to attack with 12 yr old behavior. Urgh. Demi Lovato has GOT to get free of this penis pus ball. We need a #FreeDemi campaign.