Monday, December 23, 2013

Off Topic

I need a duck recipe because my mom doesn't want to cook a duck. She will cook a turducken but not a duck. I don't get the difference.

33 comments:

OneEyeCharlie said...

Ooooh, sumbitch. Let's do this.

MISCH said...

O.K first of you'll need at least 3 ducks just for yourself….

OneEyeCharlie said...

Get your duck, and brine it for at least a day; longer if you can. Use about a cup of kosher salt and a couple of gallons of water. Throw in some lightly crushed peppercorns if you want.

Prior to roasting, slice the skin/tendon at the base of the drumstick. Truss the legs together. Roast at 350 for about 3.25 hours. Pour off and reserve the fat. If you throw it out... you're a np-good-pinko-commie-bastard that makes baby jesus cry.

Eat the skin (for the same reason that you don't discard the fat). Rehydrate dried cherries, or get raspberries to make a compote to serve on the side.

Use yukon gold potatoes for mashed potatoes. Add a stick of butter, some Half&Half, and a couple tablespoons of the duck fat as you're whipping it in the KitchenAid.

Eat, eat, eat, And then undo the top button of your pants.

Sugar said...

We are making cioppino for Christmas eve. It's so delicious and we do it every year.

Im just sayin said...

Can you come cook for me?

LA Native said...

damn charlie, thats hot. ever been to NE FL? ;)

Jacq said...

A friend was talking about a Tur-pork-en. Which, is like a turducken, but with a pork tenderloin instead of a duck. Duck's too fatty for me.

OneEyeCharlie said...

@ All the ladies. This is just a subtle way for me to get you to unbutton your pants. "Just one more slice want hurt. C'mon, it's the holidays."

OneEyeCharlie said...

Won't

OneEyeCharlie said...

Addendum: If you use the packet of orange sauce that comes with the duck, I will have to go Amish on your ass and shun you. Just don't do it.

Kelly said...

I'm doing a spiral ham. The duck I tried made me wanna hurl.

Kept in Cages said...

Brine the duck in a high fat milk to soften it and to remove any of that "gamey" taste. The lactic acid works wonders on any meat of that sort, like venison or the like.

Prepare next as you would like. My family hails from the land that originated the turducken, btw, if anyone wants a recipe for that?

OneEyeCharlie said...

@ Reno. I'm sorry to hear that. However, that is like saying "I had sex with a guy once, and it made me want to hurl". Not all ducks are the same, Sugar. In fact, you should try getting ducked again .-)

Sugar said...

yes?

amulbunny's random thoughts said...

Duck is too greasy for me. We're having a spiral ham with pecan maple glaze, sushi for the fish friends, and sammiches for those of us who need it. Since half the people in each home are germy I'd prefer to put it off till we feel better.

Seven of Eleven said...

Oh, Charlie, food literotica! I will be oh so happy when this damn cold goes away and I can taste food again.

On the rehydrated cherries note, I'm not sure I can forgive MichaelK for posting the Jodie Marsh terducker. :/

OneEyeCharlie said...

Love ya, dear.

Bessie Smith said...
This comment has been removed by the author.
Bessie Smith said...

Dear Enty: I am allergic to kitchens. Not a good cook. I cooked a duck once that my uncle had shot. Mercy. It smelled really bad, as in gamey. I had even made a sauce for it of canned cranberry sauce, brown sugar, frozen condensed orange juice. The sauce was yummy. The duck was inedible, and it smelled up the whole house. We were astonished. I have since heard that one could braise the duck in wine beforehand to get the gaminess out. But, I don't think you want to take cooking hints from me, generally. How about epicurious.com? Or the internet. Anyway, there must be more pleasant ducks than the one I had. We had a turkey once that my dad shot on my mother's land that had been eating peppers. Don't know where the turkey got the peppers, but that turkey was hooooooooot! I wish you bon chance.

OneEyeCharlie said...

Ahhhhhhjj! My eye, my eye. Oh dear god.

AJ said...

@OneEyedCharlie
Yum Yum.

Sherry said...

There is a food truck in the bay area called Rolli Roti that makes amazing rotisseried chicken. The Opster said they had some ducks roasting on Sat. and I can only imagine that would get rid of all the fat (sadly you wouldn't have any for those delicious duck fat fries later) but would be good for those who find the bird too fatty.

Sounds like our Hotty McOneEye has the right idea for the home cook. I don't eat duck but would love to make it for friends who do enjoy it.

Charlie where do you stand on the milk soak? Can't call that a brine since no salt is involved.

Sherry said...

Oh yeah, Roli also had pig kunkle. That's right, the spelling comes from a Chinese restaurant we were at once and has always stuck as a joke.
But it is a knuckle.

OneEyeCharlie said...

@sherry I would use the milk soak if you're using wild duck: mallard, canvasback, etc. Their natural diet is of a more suspect and varied nature; leading to the potential gamey flavor. You shouldn't need it for a store bought pekin or muskovin. With them, definitely go with the brine. The long (3.25) hr roast renders off most of the fat for those who think duck is too greasy. Leaving behind warm, tender succulent duck that you slowly wrap your lips around.

OKay said...
This comment has been removed by the author.
OKay said...

I used to know a woman who stuffed her duck with sauerkraut. She said it soaked up a lot of the grease and made for a tasty side dish. I dunno...still can't say I ever want to try duck.

OneEyeCharlie said...

Oooh, Cee Kay. You're breakin' my heart .-(

My children won't eat chicken anymore; they say it's too bland.

I almost forgot. Save the neck and the carcass. Use it to make stock. Then use said stock when you're making risotto. Fuck me raw, soooooo good. Duck stock risotto with porcine mushrooms, garlic, and pine nuts. Try that and you'd be begging to marry me.

OneEyeCharlie said...

Porcini mushrooms - swear to god, spelchek, you doubt me again and I'll kick your ass.

Sherry said...

LOL! Charlie...Porcine mushrooms might be a good mix as well.

califblondy said...

Damn, what's for dessert?

Redd said...

@amulbunny- is there a recipe for the pecan glaze that you might recommend? that sounds delish.

OneEyeCharlie said...

@ Caliblondy I could make creme brulee. I usually grind French Vanilla coffee beans superfine and incorporate it in the brown sugar to make a quasi- coffee creme brulee

Kelly said...

Love it! @OneEye! I shall take your advice.

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