Monday, December 09, 2013

Your Turn

So, you are at a coffee shop and it is pouring rain and packed and you are late. The person in line in front of you motions for his friends to join him in line. How many friends are acceptable? Does it make a difference if they are all deaf? This happened to me. There were about ten people he invited. Yes, they all ordered drinks.

46 comments:

Kassandra said...

Patience is a virtue.

Derek Harvey said...

I would have said something! One or 2 people fine but it does not matter if they are deaf...deaf people should have manners as well

Renoblondee said...

It's not worth the stress and drama to say or do anything about stuff like that.

Violet said...

Christ no. None is acceptable. But then I'm English and queue jumping is just unacceptable here. Although of course we wouldn't actually say anything. We'd just stare daggers and mutter passive aggressively under our breath.

Kristin said...

What does being deaf have to do-- never mind.

It would depend on if I was hungover or not.

auntliddy said...

Not acceptable, deaf or not. Just say, excuse me, i was next and im in a bit of a hurry and order. If not in rush up to to you. If they challenge you just talk really fast and they'll get confused and give up, lol. TOTALLY KIDDING. TOTALLY KIDDING. TOTALLY KIDDING. I have hearing impared folks in my life and they have a sense of humor!!

WareCat said...

like 2yrs ago, i had to waitress a table of 10 clowns.
like, legit clowns.
it was fukn weird.
none were deaf tho.

Pip said...

If it's a wife or significant other, that's one thing, a few friends is another. I would be nice but firm in saying I need to be somewhere and if they could wait like the rest of us, I would appreciate it. If that didn't work, I would talk over douchebag in front of me, to tell the barista about the whole gang of friends cutting. If it's a long line, I doubt I'd be the only one complaining.

Pip said...

Deaf doesn't mean mentally challenged, they know cutting in line is rude, just like everyone else. I don't understand why that is even a question.

Seven of Eleven said...

You get a lot of line jumpers in LA.

Earlier this week, I had a CDaN deja vu - an older lady, obviously frustrated with the long lines, asked me if she could get in front of me. She was holding a card and what looked like a candle. I said sure, go right ahead of my very full cart because really, it would be a delay of maybe 5 minutes at the very most, but there was no delay at all - by the time I finished unloading my cart, she was done and the clerk had already started ringing me up. Lady paid in cash and asked the clerk that the change go toward my receipt. It wasn't much, maybe paid for a couple of apples, but she didn't have to do that and she took off before I even knew about it and could say thank you.

I don't know... maybe not look past a reason to be kind if a situation allows it. But I don't see how people being deaf plays into it. Deaf people don't need coffee more than hearing people.

Sophie Helene said...

I totally would not mind. This sort of thing rarely happens anyway.

I hate queue cutting, but my approach to it is to always make a point of letting someone go before me when a new register opens, just to show everyone that this is how it should be.

I am Canadian and I live in France where queue cutting is a national sport. They are totally uncivilized about it here.

Eros said...

Enty you're nice. Deadf or not they should have made some motion to you prior to them bumrushing the line. Thats effin rude

Violet said...

I wear hearing aids. My manners are impeccable. I'm trying to work out the scenario where my poor hearing would mean it would be ok for me to jump the queue. Unless people feel sorry for me? I wouldn't mind if it saved me some time.

Bessie Smith said...

Violet and Aunt Liddy - totally with you on this. That is not acceptable. Everyone has something in their life to bear, no? And everyone is supposed to have been taught manners. Does having a handicap oneself mean that one doesn't have to be considerate of others? No, it doesn't. And I have been in a situation where I felt like my business was just as important as the other person trying to cut in line. I was in line first, was late, said, I'm sorry, but I am late and I need you to let me go ahead as I was here first. Ten friends? There's no excuse for that. And if they are deaf, one can always tap them on the shoulder and shake your head no. Sorry that happened Enty. It's times like these I bet you're glad you have a blog.

menadensch said...

So basically, you got screwed. People took advantage of your kindness and because the suspect parties were deaf you couldn't verbally call out this ratchet behavior without looking like an ass yourself. Methinks they've done this before.

Paint Chips said...

I would just leave - I'm not a confrontational kind of person.

FSP said...

I want to know what One-Eye Charlie would have done.

Jason Blue Eyes said...

Oh, If that happened to me I would be all like this.

S.joy said...

Something like this has never happened to me. I know asl though, so I would def have no problem signing "excuse me, I was here first."

OneEyeCharlie said...

Well damn! I didn't realize having a physical disability granted asshole rights. This has the potential to be a HUGE time saver. At the market, at the DMV, waiting at the theater, toilets at sporting events. I'm gonna milk this emm effer for all it's worth. Maybe I could tip less at strip bars?? "Sorry, Chica. I'm only catching your bewbs in monocular."

I probably would have plucked out my prosthetic and "accidentally" dropped it into one of their lattes.

Sherry said...

Agreed one or two is one thing but 10 is pushing it. I always point out that others are waiting and it's not fair to them. That way I have the crowd as back up! And if they protested I would ask if they would be happy if they were the ones being cut in front of. Honestly if everyone tried walking a mile in other peoples shoes this world would be a much kinder place.

WTF with the Deaf question? I still can't understand what that's all about.

msgirl said...

Disabilty doesn't mean not acting like a decent human being.

Count Jerkula said...

After the first one, I would have put my arm out to cut them off, and given em the thumb to the back of the line. They get the good parking spots, they don't get to cut in line.


P.S. If anyone is into deaf chicks, there is a REALLY hot blond who did a Bang Bus scene a couple years ago. She even brought her sign translator into the van (the translator didn't participate, just watched). Good scene. The deaf chick on FacialAbuse long ago was fucking disturbing.

sifichick said...

I have a disability, legally blind, & I also have manners. Just because someone is disabled doesn't mean they get to be rude. Cutting in line is rude. They should have asked if all their friend could cut in. It takes 2 seconds to do. Even for a deaf person.

If someone tries to cut it depends on the situation. Just 1 I might say something depending on if I need to be somewhere or not. If it's a ton of people I tell them to move their asses to the back of the line like everyone else.

OneEyeCharlie said...

This just reminded me of a traffic incident long ago. There was a stretch of road where it when from two lanes, down to one, and then back to two. Clearly marked by road signs. Some asshole in a big pickup decided he would circumvent all the cars patiently queed by zipping along the merge lane. He thought he would cut in front of me. Uh uh, Charlie don't play like that. I kept goosing the gas just enough to keep the gap just too narrow.

He tried several times and then gave up. He then managed to ease in several cars back. Looking in the rear view mirror, I could see that he was seething. When the road widened to two lanes again, he shot back over and was running parallel with me. Shortly thereafter we came to a red light. I saw his window go down and him emphatically gesture for me to lower mine as well.

The first words from his lips were "I was trying to get over. What are you, fucking blind?" I sat for a second before it occurred to me that I was wearing my RayBan Aviators. I took them off and pointed to my patch. I then said "As a matter of fact, I sorta am." His window went right back up and he refused to make any eye contact from that point on. The only downside was hearing my daughter chirping from her car seat "Daddy, why that man use bad word?" for the next half hour. Ha.

aemish said...

If it's all one ticket, he can have as many people he wants.. If it's more than one ticket, they need to wait their turn.

Looziana Magnolia said...

That's really nice!! I had a friend who was at Target and had a bunch of baby stuff in her cart for her newborn. A random lady struck up a conversation with her, asking about the baby, etc. My friend said later the woman was at the check out on front of her and paid for everything in her cart! She was so overwhelmed. Random acts of kindness are the best!

MadLyb said...

I'd go to my happy place after killing them all in my mind.

Actually, I'd just stare intently at the pretty baked goods and try to think of images you could create with coffee foam as if nothing out of the ordinary had happened after doing the quick "glance" at them all. Because here in Seattle, we're passive aggressive like that, and besides, once you live here long enough, you develop the keen capability of telepathically conveying your displeasure with a subtle look. The down side is you can feel it when it is directed at you. The thing is, I'm only half joking.

NomNom83 said...

@OneEyeCharlie: I almost did a spit-take. That is priceless.

Devon said...

He should have just ordered for everyone. Taken just as much time, but not pissed everyone off in back of him in line.

Snapdragon said...

1-2 = OK
10 = NOT OK, is rude, and they shouldn't even be asking, deaf or not (WTF).

Being run up once or ten times hardly makes a difference. There are still ten drinks to make, and that takes time.

car54 said...

I probably wouldn't say anything--if I was in a hurry I'd have gone to the drive-through. It's not that big a deal to me.

Eros said...

Violet, you sound like such a sweetie. I like your name choice. Not quite lavender but just as pretty.

Eros said...

Enty, your experience sounds like a curb your enthusiasm episode. You should have went all Larry David on their asses. Lol

redronnie said...

no, my time is as valuable as the next person, since I'm old maybe more. People have tried this on a number of occasions and I simply tell them the end of the line is back there, I am polite but firm and use a smile, but have been told my fangs are dripping with anticipation

Worstcompanytoworkfor said...

That is so rude!

califblondy said...

It's very common where I live, one person gets in line and then multiple folks and carts show up and cut the line. This works for the ten items or less line too. Each person in the party takes ten items and they pay separately until the cart is empty. It's rude and frustrating as hell, but I'm used to it now. What I hate are the men in line who keep whistling for their people I guess to signal them that it's time to pay.

Tenisha said...

Not acceptable at all and I would have said something. 10 people?? That's bullsh*t! Mayyyyybe one is okay...but any more than that is straight up rude.

NaughtyNurse said...

I'm going to go out on a limb and say they weren't deaf but played on your sympathies by pretending to be deaf, figuring (correctly) that you wouldn't stop them!

aemish said...

I think you guys are really forgetting that maybe the single-ticket whole-party payer may not have rememberized every individuals beverage of choice and merely held the single-paying place in line and called them only up to the counter to deliver their individual preferences of beverage. It wasn't directly implied that each individual was granted individual order and cash register access; merely access to the order taker and beverage preparer. No different were he to rattle off orders himself or each one by one as long as it was all on the same bill.

Beth said...

No cutting in line. I have no problem reminding people there is a line and where they can locate the end of it.

But I tell people with fewer items than me to go ahead of me ALL the time at the grocery store--I love to see the surprised expressions on their faces, and it really is a nice thing to do.

Craig said...

I'm in a coffee shop? Is there a gun to my head? Am I under the influence of drugs and have no idea what I'm doing? Am I sleepwalking?

This is a queueing issue. I'm from the UK. There are rules. It's not ever likely to happen here unless it's a tourist. The etiquette of queuing is sacrosanct!

If someone cuts in line you have the right to murder them on the spot. If they invite others I think you can also kill at least 3 generations of their immediate family.

Get a grip people, this is civilisation. Where you live by the rules and stop spelling English words incorrectly!

__-__=__ said...

The ability to let that which truly doesn't matter slide.

timebob said...

If I wasn't in a rush, I would let it slide. If I have 2 minutes to catch my train and is suffering caffeine withdrawal then someone's gonna get cut.

That shit wouldn't fly in my NYC.

Rome said...

I've had that happen. I simply said, look, if you're going to invite people to butt ahead of everyone else, start with me, because I'm not waiting. The guy said, sure, no problem and let me go first. It was a fairly pleasant exchange, actually, but I could see it getting ugly too.

NYer said...

please, life is too short. why does it matter whether or not it was raining?