Monday, February 10, 2014

Chris Kattan Arrested For DUI

Former SNL actor and bad movie mainstay Chris Kattan was arrested for DUI very early this morning. Apparently Chris was driving all over the highway and people called the police. The police didn't get him pulled over before he rear ended a Department Of Transportation truck that was parked beyond some cones on a closed off section of the highway. Yeah, you know someone is blitzed when they run through cones and hit something. Chris is always fighting to stay clean and doesn't do a very good job of it. He usually looks like he has been up for days doing drugs and probably has. He is the star of five or six blinds but could be twenty or thirty if I wanted to write about him more. There is one about an assistant he hired just because she could get him the best drugs. That was while he was married. I don't remember if the blind talked about the sex he would have with the assistant.

23 comments:

ethorne said...

Bad Mango!

Steampunk Jazz said...

he's lucky no one got killed. Next relapse? Get a driver...

Seven of Eleven said...

Sucks when your last name isn't Lohan. And boo-hiss to drunk driving!

Violet said...

Is that him in the photo in the bird t shirt? Cos it looks nothing like him or else he's got a bizarre looking wig on ( even given that he's not blessed with the best looks anyway).

Seven of Eleven said...
This comment has been removed by the author.
Seven of Eleven said...

That's him all right. And here's the video of him trying and failing miserably to walk a straight line - the cop at one point had to hold him up. He's very lucky he survived, that car was jacked up.

discoflux said...

Got on a plain white tee when you're pulled over for DUI? Liven it up! Put a bird on it!

Steampunk Jazz said...

Morning seven, I Hate it when the cops make you do the walk/ road tests. Just take me to jail...

Ginger said...

Is that really him? With that hair style he looks like Moe from the Three Stooges.

parissucksliterally said...

He looks like Howard from "The Big Bang Theory" in that pic.

Alex Tuttle said...

all the blinds say he is gay and hiv+?

aemish said...

He was soooo disappointing on Celebrity Cook Off.. I think he's manic depressive..

auntliddy said...

Get help buddy. You are worth it. :)

Celeb Friend said...

Chris Kattan admitted to police he was on prescription meds,but I say he is doing more than that.

Car is toast,he is lucky he did not kill himself or someone else.

Sherry said...

@Discoflux..I was thinking the same thing! Hahaha..
He has unfortunate hair.

JoElla said...

@ethrone hahahahahahaha!

The subject isn't funny, he really could have killed someone.

But the Bad Mango! comment, totally cracked me up!

Linda K said...

He got written off The Middle and I wondered if it was because of his drug use.

brittiany said...

LOL @ discoflux love it!

Rhody said...

I hadn't heard he was an addict. Then again, I don't hear much about him at all. And I agree that pic looks nothing like him.

teresa crane said...

BAWHAHA this picture is too much. And @discoflux LOL!! Perfect.

Yeah he's fucking lucky he didn't kill himself or someone else. This weekend was for some reason a big one for drunk driving accidents. Did you guys see the news about the two that happened on Sunday? One in FL, the other here in CA. Shit like that scares the hell out of me. Get a cab (or Uber!) people!!

kpist said...

Officer: Mr. Kattan, have you been drinking?

Mr. Kattan: nooooooo, yeeeesssss, thanks for the setup

GPS74 said...

That is very unfortunate hair he is sporting.

Wasn't he the popular guess for a blind about a guy with a drug problem living in the closet?

Princess Nobody said...

Love that Portlandia sketch! Sad thing is, Kattan could be doing great comedy work if he was sober and he's throwing it away.