Wednesday, May 28, 2014

Blind Items Revealed

April 7, 2014

This Mad Men actress was at Starbucks this past weekend and spent 10 minutes ordering one item. She literally asked about every drink and food item and said she couldn't decide and took out her phone and called someone and asked what she should get. Apparently she was drunk and looked like a mess.

Jessica Pare

38 comments:

Unknown said...

No idea who she is but I'd have been pissed if I was stuck behind her.

ladybaus said...

oh god her that lisp...

OneEyeCharlie said...

Back in my twenties, I may have had some similar episodes. Of course, I didn't have the luxury of being able to whip out a cell phone and asking for backup. Kids these days have it too easy.

missKWyumyum said...

shocked it wasn't January Jones. But it sounds like they'd make good drinking buddies.

Kno Won said...

I can't think of anything I loathe more than some random asshat squandering *my* time in the middle of an otherwise ordinary day.
Who the ĵ¢k do they think they are?

SlowShine said...

Larry David would be pretty, pretty pretty upset

SlowShine said...

Larry David would be pretty, pretty pretty upset

Kno Won said...

I just realized the other day that I practically chant "get out of my way, get the f@ck out of my way" while I'm driving. Courting a rage coronary.

sandybrook said...

Back in the day Denny's was the place to feed your drunk on., not a douchy place like Starbucks

missKWyumyum said...

@SlowShine well at least she wasn't sampling all the flavours. And it doesn't sound like she tried the old chat and cut routine

Riven said...

I have my own chant of "You are all assholes. I hate you all."

Also I get sarcastic too. Like "Oh hey good for you, you finally found your friggin gas pedal. Oh no wait, false alarm, THAT'S STILL THE BREAK."

No rage issues. I swears. I'm incredibly pleasant to be around.

Riven said...

Obviously she couldn't decide what to eat, she's not used to eating solid foods.

Unknown said...

Don't recognise her face or her name this time,,,but it's a shame and I hope she gets help,

MikeAdamson said...

I've seen her on a couple of talk shows and I think she's fabulous.

Jason Blue Eyes said...

Zou Bisou Bisou.

Seven of Eleven said...

LOL @JBE, stole my line!

In return, here is Drunk Megan Draper.

Dena said...

I think I was behind her at Redbox last weekend.

SugarTitz said...

thank god don draper had the good sense to dump her!!
@sandybrook.. one time in dallas @19 i was soooo drunsky on goldshlager i ended up at dennys at 4am and it ended up all over my then bosses car aboot an hour later. i had to work a few hours later at pork bbq restaurant and kept running to bathroom to vomit all day long!!!
love dennys!!!

Gayeld said...

OMG, I got so so lucky that the first time my daughter decided to repeat what Mommy had just said in the car it was "Go, go, GO!" instead of "Pick a fuckin' lane, already." Major commute potty mouth clean-up after that.

Gayeld said...

@sandybrook. Taco Bell!

Unknown said...

Okay, okay, imma gonna let you finish, but let me just say (rambles incoherently for 20 minutes)...

Gimme a cake pop.

Sincerely,Your Friend said...

Laffin.
Sometimes I worry about my interior "sarcasm" .
If it's an inferior female driver I say, "get out of my way, u probably have the smelliest c u next Tuesday". (But, I use tbe word "cunt" or sometimes "twat" or "pussy"!)
Cringe!

If male inferior driver, then naturally I have to say, "U fucking jerk, I guess u need that Monster truck cuz ur dicks so small" or " yeah, ur dicks so small u gotta take it out on tbe road, and u prob would, too, if u could find it!"

Good thing Im not a soccer mom.

Toodles

nurysp said...

hope we never have to see her raggedy ass teeth again!!

Paint Chips said...

Hilarious blind - I actually like her on mad men.

Sherry said...

Oh Nurysp..I was just watching that scene and thought "THOSE TEEFS!!"

Here's what a bitch I am...I've had people argue over a few pennies off coupon at the Walgreen's . I tell them I'll GIVE them that just to go away. 25 cents off? Here ya go. Ring her up. Seriously I know people are on a budget and all but the pennies people bitch about astound me.

NaughtyNurse said...

Gayeld, I feel your pain. For a long time, my little girl would say, "dammit!" every time she dropped something.

califblondy said...

When did it become okay to drive 45 in the passing lane? OMG, one of these days I'm running right over granny hogging my lane.

cece said...

Ugh. I do that too. Get the fuck out of my way, people. :(

cece said...

Haha - Krystal!

OneEyeCharlie said...

My daughter was similar, Naughty, but she misheard us. So every time something went wrong when she was playing, she would say "oh, damage!" It was at that point that I started to say "shoot" and "fudge!"

RowdyRodimus said...

On Christmas Eve back in 1991, we had just left my Grandma's house and went to the ice cream place through drive through. Mom, Dad and my bro had already ordered and I asked what flavors they had. The woman named off about 50. I then ordered Vanilla. We still laugh about that, wasting 10 minutes of the woman's life. It was mean but funny and honestly, I didn't mean to do it but that was all that sounded good at the time.

biteme said...

Hey Califblondy! I have the same issue. Where in California are you? I swear everyday I go to work and come home, some idiot is in the middle lane of a 3 lane road (left is for commuters) and just putts along like there is no one else out there. Every day I see this.

Sprink said...

JBE, why don't you sing like that?

Trilby said...

See, the difference between an indecisive drunken mess Trilby at Starbucks and an indecive drunken mess Pare at Starbucks is that I would have told them to just give me one of every damn thing. To go.

Trilby said...

Shit. "indecisive".

Hegg said...

I've seen her around a couple of times and she always seemed quiet and actually nice. She has lost so much weight, though. No wonder she gets tipsy! She has lost over 25 pounds that she didn't need.

Robin the Mad Photographer said...

A friend of mine realized she needed to watch her language while her 2-year-old daughter was in the car after one fine day when she slammed on the brakes, and a cheerful little voice in the back seat piped up "PIGFUCKER!"

Unknown said...

OH MY GOD, that's just AWESOME!

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