Wednesday, June 11, 2014

Blind Items Revealed

April 24, 2014

This married one named singer who used to be A list back in the day has been doing press for her new endeavor but it hasn't been going well. Apparently the past few stops she has made to television and radio stations she has been treating everyone but who interviews her like crap. At one station she made a staffer cry because our singer had asked for a certain kind of water and it wasn't available without going to a store.

Jewel

61 comments:

FSP said...

Did she get fake boobies?

JMY said...

..but what was so bad with the store?

Kno Won said...

That was a major point with the original posting. Who the hell is so delicate that having to go to a STORE for water makes them cry? Get another job, Bambi.

Kno Won said...

Love the shoes, @FSP

skimpymist said...

No poland spring for her!

Unknown said...

I worked as an exec asst, running to a store is pretty common, not that big of a deal, but Jewel was probably pretty nasty about it.

Zeeky_Boogy_Doog said...

I personally wouldn't mind having to go to the store to buy Jewel some water. That means I would be PAID TO GET AWAY FROM HER! She. sucks. so. much.

Yes, please, yodel a song about smoking pot in a key that rattles my dental fillings, it's wonderful, really. Peter Murphy, I will never forgive you for foisting... that... on your audience!

Unknown said...

imagine it was the nastiness not the having to go to the store and you don't know if that person already had a ton of stuff on her plate but people like Jewel forget that the trip on the way done is a lot faster when you are a nasty piece of work as no one is going to lift a finger to help you

Shelly Shell said...

She's a has been that peaked in 96, and trying pop or country didn't help her.

Unknown said...

LOL Zeeky

You know if you can't survive without your Smart Water by Jennifer Aniston [or fill in the blank overpriced tap water in a bottle brand] why don't you make sure you always have some with you but you know gotta get that bottled water for free.

Now if it was DaSani or AquaFina and she has stomach issues I would understand, the doctor tells you to drink that kind of bottled water, but again you should be carrying crates of that with you in the first place if you had any sense

Lady Heisenberg said...

Told ya Jewel is a fucking nightmare. Sorry for those who buy her I grew up in a van and I'm a sweet litlle SD hippie teeheeeheee bullshit

DavidHowesCREBroker said...

Was she a diva when she was homeless?

Gayeld said...

I guess the water just wasn't meant for her.

Unknown said...

not literally carrying crates, you know what I mean....

Lady Heisenberg said...

And again, major congrats to Dallas Alice for this win

Dallas Alice said...

POW POW!! My first (and very likely last) correct first guess!!

Dallas Alice said...

Thanks Lady H!!

Lady Heisenberg said...

Fuck yeah homegirl. A thousand yodelayheehoos to you

sandybrook said...

Maybe the store was 30 mikes away from a small town with a radio station in Montana or Wyoming? :( where else would anyone care about her?

Unknown said...

Jewel is from Alaska. She's been away long enough to be a complete citified diva now.

Kristin Wigs said...

Nice one, Dallas Alice!

SugarTitz said...

If the water didn't taste good it was probably depressed and Jewel should have sung it a song and it would have tasted better. Gotten rid if the negative energy and all

The Real Dragon said...

I want to be bad singer?

Zeeky_Boogy_Doog said...

If for some reason I ever worked for Jewel, I'd be sure to buy shitloads of her favorite water... then drown myself in it.

LottaColada said...

DRAGON!

Sincerely,Your Friend said...

FSP, u made me Laff. (It's a very important question and maybe in a bl we'll find that they're CONCIOUS UNCOUPLING FUNBAGS.

Sincerely,Your Friend said...

New newbies need water, and not just any kind dammit!

Anonymous said...

Whats with the "crying" staffer? Was she 9 or something?

Grow a pair, FFS...

Sarah said...

The only reason I could imagine someone crying is if they were excited to meet her and then she was very mean.
Getting paid to leave work is awesome.

Jessica said...

She probably requested Voss water because they're teaming up with her and Virgin to support Give a Drop which teams up with her long-time charity, Project Cleanwater, a charity meant to bring fresh drinking water to places that otherwise wouldn't have it.

If anyone's interested: http://www.jeweljk.com/cleanwater.html

Jonathan Andrew Sheen said...

I used to enjoy watching people blow a buck on a bottle of Aquafina. The bottles had stamped on them, Bottled: Ayer, MA PWS. "PWS" stands for "Public Water Supply." I used to live in Ayer, MA, and twice a year, the town used to flush the fire hydrants, and for days afterwards, what came out of people's kitchen taps was orange/brown, and smelled like sewage.

Enjoy your expensive tap-water, though!

rajahcat said...

I call BS

Frosty said...

Being a has-been is tough, yall

califblondy said...

She used to be so sweet and down to earth, but I thought she was pretentious on that a capella singing show. Those fake boobs must have messed with her mind.

Unknown said...

Marsha: [as Grace is bringing water to their table] Oh no-no-no-no-no! Do you have *bottled* water?
Grace Briggs: Sure. Anybody else?
Marsha: I don't want Swiss water. I got sick on an imported Swiss water.
[to her friend]
Marsha: Do you remember that night? As long as it's not Swiss or tap water it will be fine, preferably French, no bubbles. I want it cold, no ice, no glass, just the bottle and a straw. Do you want to write it down? I don't want Swiss water, I got sick on an imported Swiss water once...
Grace Briggs: I'm pretty sure I got it.
Marsha: [later, as Grace is telling her the specials] That sounds so *fattening*. Is every dish here cooked in *oil*?
Grace Briggs: No... some we boil in Swiss water.

kelli grrrl said...

Whenever I think of Jewel, it reminds me of the skit on SNL where a man wins a contest to spend a year in a cabin in the Alaskan wilderness with her. Jewel ends up driving the dude crazy with her constant singing & snaggle tooth.

AJ said...

@Lulu
I love that movie.

Hanwi said...

It's not that hard to understand the part about making the staffer cry. Surely it was just badly written, no staffer would start crying just because they were asked to buy water. I'd imagine that after learning that the right water wasn't available she took it out on the staffer like the biggest bitch in the world. Some people are just hideosly mean assholes and love to yell their subordinates to tears. And some people just are more sensitive to bad behavior.

Unknown said...

Sounds like some bullshit here. She may be a bitch but the crying staffer must have issues of her own.

FlirtyChick74 said...

I read several years ago that the van story was a complete fraud. It was a much better sell than upper class girl from wealthy Alaskan family.

AKM said...

I think I like Jewel. (ducks) Double-secret deets on why she sucks so wicked hard, please!

Kelly said...

Bottled water is a total scam.

Anonymous said...

The Kirchners are the family in one of those tv shows that are all 'back to the land, or whatever. So I think she grew up pretty rugged. I can't remember the name of the show, with Otz and Otz Lee and all of them, they are country bumpkin ranchers.

8====D KermitGossnellKnobjob said...

The kirchners are the kleptomaniacs (only she right now, cuz the husband is dead meat) who rule Argentina.


She is Kilcher, and her rags to riches story is a "load of crap":

http://www.cracked.com/article_16989_6-inspiring-rags-to-riches-stories-that-are-bullshit.html

Krissie said...

@kelli_girl, wow, somebody else remembers that! It was hilarious. The best part was at the end where Jewel's manager tells her she's not popular anymore, and Jewel yells, "BUT I LIVED IN A CAR!" and the manager says, "Well, you're gonna live in one again!"

There is no excuse for Jewel making someone cry over some stupid bottled water. Maybe the assistant needs to toughen up, but I don't care, it's terrible to make someone cry over something so unimportant.

Clark St. said...

Pepsi bottles Aquafina in its bottling plants all over the country using the same water that's in Pepsi.

auntliddy said...

So she goes from being homeless to being all special about her water? I dint buy it. This water snobbery is asinine- just drink out the f* cking tap, idiot, its fine!

NaughtyNurse said...

Please. She asked for a certain type of water on her rider and the station made the staffer get it "or else." She didn't ask for cocaine or midget hookers or even two dozen purple roses.

NaughtyNurse said...

These people need to try to work with surgeons every day. You want demanding prima donnas? Try surgeons.

auntliddy said...

Naughty- oh i hear ya!!! I worked office with 8 of them. Talk about prima donnas!

alb said...

Her family has their own reality show. Alaska the final frontier or something like that. Her dad, brother, cousin, uncle all live on this homestead with no indoor plumbing. Her bro and sister in law are real morons, too. Bad planning.

Krissie said...

At least surgeons do something good. They save lives. What good has Jewel ever done? She yodels. She can drink tap water.

witwritergirl said...

Such a refined palate and discerning taste for someone who grew up pooping in the woods.

MissInfo said...

Amen!!! I am still waiting for her to fix that snaggle tooth!

RowdyRodimus said...

Did Jewel ever get those dead teeth she had fixed? People always mention Kirsten Dunst's teeth but those things look perfectly straight and white compared to those couple of brown rotting teeth Jewel used to have in the front.

KSierra said...

@NaughtyNurse...I have nothing but praise for those arrogant surgeons and Doctors, as one of the saved my 27 year old son-in-law's life yesterday morning! Less than 24 hours ago, he had to have open-heart surgery to fix a heart valve that was bad (he only has 3, instead of 4, a birth defect he only learned of 4 months ago), and to relieve and fix an aortic aneurysm. Those people can be as arrogant as they want, in my book! My daughter still has a husband, and my granddaughter still has her Dad, thanks to that man! :D

WUWT? said...

KSierra, I hope your son-in-law's recovery goes well. I've heard that a haunting depression is very common after heart surgery, so be aware of that and keep surrounding him with love. Best wishes and prayers to your family!

KSierra said...
This comment has been removed by the author.
KSierra said...

@WUWT?...Thank you so much for the good advice. It's a traumatic thing to go thru, for sure. He was living on a "bypass machine" there for a few hours, while they were fixing his heart. I will pay attention, and tell my daughter to do so, too. We've all been love-bombing him and my daughter the past 4 months, and it has NOT been an easy time, to be sure. I'll make sure it keeps up. Jeez, it's just such a RELIEF, that he survived that surgery, and to have that part over. I understand, and thank you for that, that his recovery time is JUST AS important as his surgery was to his healthy survival. THANK YOU for your well-wishes and prayers. That and your heads-up is much appreciated. :D

RowdyRodimus said...

@KSierra I'm not a fan of doctor's in any regard, I have my reasons and I think two people here know why (Count and TTM) but whatever my feelings on them, I'm glad they were able to help your Son-In-law and I'm sending thoughts his way that he gets stronger and stronger until he's better than ever. My Dad had 3 heart attacks within an hour back in March of 2012 and had to be rushed in for heart surgery, so I know how scary and dangerous it can be. Love to you and all of your family during this.

Procrastibator said...

Two things I won't forgive her for - that hideous album (and cover) for her foray into pop, and dating Sean Penn.

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