Thursday, July 26, 2007

Ali Lohan Is A Pawn



This is my interpretation of what must have been going through Ali's mind prior to e-mailing the guy from Best Week Ever.

"Hi, I'm 13 years old and like every 13 year old in the world I know the e-mail address to the host of Best Week Ever. I decided on my own to write to him to tell him my side of the story about Lindsay. Just like my mom and our friends and my uncle and my 2nd cousin and 4th cousin and the step nephew once removed have all been e-mailing press contacts and telling them anything and filling their head with doubts. Now we have people convinced that (1) Lindsay wasn't driving (2) the pants she was wearing with cocaine in them weren't her pants (3) that she is cursed by Dori Cooperman (ent's note--actually that one is probably true) (4) my dad is a jerk and doesn't know what he's saying (also probably true) (5) Lindsay was just trying to counsel her assistant because Lindsay is a healer, (6) wanted to give her mom an escort home because Lindsay is a caring person (7) confronted the mom in the parking lot because Lindsay could tell the mom needed a hug, and that the SCRAM was working until two hours before her arrest. (that's a whole bunch of drinking, driving, chasing and changing pants in two hours)"
Now, for the actual e-mail. I think she and Lindsay must have had the same spelling teacher.
Hi david this is ali lohan, i want everybody to know the truth out there. My mom is a single mom of four children she has always been there for us, she was my mother and father and still is. My father is telling all lies to people and saying he was such a great dad and was always there for us, my father was never there for us, My mom was always there souporting us. i think that the whole reason why my sister is upset with her self and not as cofident, is because of my dad not being around, and always staying out late and not coming home for days, he would come back home never himself, he was always was making excuses for his bad behavior . And would always blame my mother. He just wants everybody in the world knowing that he was a great dad. He wasnt that is all a lie. I just want my sister to stick throught this okay, and my mother and brothers and i are there for my sister 100% and have always been. I’ve wanted to say this for so long and get this out there and let everyone know that our family is like a normal family but of course we are put under a microscope because of lindsays fame, lindsay will be fine she is just going through a rough time right now but she will be fine. i know this for a fact. My sisters is just like a normal sister. her and I have so much in common. My mother and sister are huge insperations to me, they have made it through so much in there lives.Thankyou for your time god bless, Ali

10 comments:

  1. Yeah, she's already screwed up. Her mom and sister are inspirations to her? Yikes.

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  2. Someone please enroll this child in an English class.

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  3. Dear god someone please take all remaining Lohan children into some sort of protective custody. Anywhere but with their mother.

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  4. Anonymous11:10 AM

    I think Britney would do a great job w/the Lohan kids :)

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  5. I sincerely hope that the plans of giving Dina a show on E! has been cancelled by now!

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  6. This little girl hasn't the first idea of what even a SEMI-NORMAL family life might be.
    By all means blame it on Dad, he must have put that coke in Lindsays pants, forced the alcohol down her throat and made her drive after her assistant. Oh yes, none of it could possibly be Lindsays fault.

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  7. Jebus I thought the Lohan's were a good Catholic family?

    Well maybe its time Dina taught her kids a lil thing about FORGIVENESS.

    Ali your father was a cokehead, you were better off he wasn't around but shit happens and hes sober now..get over it and stop pointing fingers. Life ain't fair lil girl.

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  8. Hey, leave the 13 year old alone. She's defending her sister. The dad sounds like a real fuck-up and the mom has had to do what she can. She just hasnn't done enough. At least Lindsay WORKS for a living. She's not a parasite like Paris or Kim. Sure, Ali has a skeweed view of the world but give her a break. She's THIRTEEN.

    Oh, and thirteen year old couldn't be bothered with spelling. They're too busy abbreviating everything.

    LOL

    TTYL

    Cyn

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  9. gotta throw in that god bless. she should've just put KTHXBAI

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  10. i think ent is a girl...

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