Tuesday, March 04, 2008

Since When Is Lindsay So Damn Picky


I guess Lindsay Lohan does have a few preconditions you must meet before you get to have sex with her. Not many of course, but enough to where people like me wouldn't have a chance. Hostel director Eli Roth wrote on his MySpace page about how he was judged wanting by Ms. Spread Her Legs. "I was having drinks with a friend at the Beverly Hills Hotel the other night, and Lindsay Lohan walked by our booth with a girlfriend, checking us out. She then went out to the bathroom, turned around, came back and walked by us again, and mumbled to her friend "too old", and kept walking.

"Now - she's absolutely correct - but it was still pretty f***ing hilarious. Especially since we were in the Polo Lounge at the Beverly Hills Hotel - where the average age is 97. If you look too old in there you're f***ked! Time to hit the Botox!"

Now I am not saying that Lindsay needs to sleep with Eli, and Eli probably wouldn't have slept with her either, but Lindsay also needs to work, and so you shouldn't be saying things out of the side of your mouth to people who could potentially hire you. Now, I'm sure Lindsay has been told that she snubbed Eli and his friend and has probably called them or texted them and offered to go ahead and sleep with Eli and his friend to make it up to them. What she should do is stay aloof in this situation and hope that she wasn't drunk off her ass or doing something else that night. Eli is a nice enough guy that he won't care that she snubbed him. He will be more concerned with if I hire her is she going to be there everyday and be able to scream really, really loud when I need her to.

Still, an apology and a lap dance probably wouldn't hurt.

20 comments:

  1. I never thought I'd say this but Lindsay can do better than Eli Roth.

    He's kinda scummy. Actually, he's a lot scummy.

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  2. Bitch acts like she's shopping and the guy has no say in the matter. Personally, I hope nobody ever hires her again.

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  3. Ironic, given that she herself looks about 167 years old

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  4. Anonymous11:01 AM

    Funny how theres been no news since she's been back, about being CAST in anything.

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  5. bruce wasn't too old when she was barely ,almost not, 18.

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  6. Anonymous11:34 AM

    Yeah, and neither was Brett RATtner when he took her virginity at 17...or so the story goes...

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  7. I don't think Brett was her first. I thought Ashton Kutcher was...and then she dated wilmer...and then they broke up and she went nuts (in terms of sex).

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  8. No one's gonna cast her in ANYTHING without a TON of insurance. Lindsay, the money doesn't last forever, hon. And you've got a bad rep with just about everybody you need to continue your career.

    I would rather see Jax in a film, anyway.....

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  9. As a potentially working actress, why doesn't she know what Eli Roth looks like? Why couldn't she simply be adult and go to his table to say hello instead of viewing him as a potential f-buddy? Lame.

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  10. ITA, MNGoddess. Infinitely more interesting.

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  11. Judi, she's too self-involved. I'm sure if she'd known it was someone in the business she would have given him a blowjob.

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  12. Anonymous1:13 PM

    khemenu, you're probably right. She probably just fucked him, is all.

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  13. you left out Aaron Carter at 16

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  14. Exactly, Twis. And too stupid to work the schmooze to help her career - which is in the toliet.

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  15. Lindsey totally belongs in one of Eli Roth's torture porn pos movies. It's the best she could have hoped for. Now she's blown it because she didn't blow it? H'wood is eee-vil.

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  16. i was just reading through..and wtf???

    get my agent on the phone!

    hilarious.

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  17. Just an fyi - people are gonna want to see boobage.

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  18. I'm sure it doesn't help that he looks like Ben Stiller and his eyebrows could eat her face.

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  19. LOL, Duncan. You're right.

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  20. He went home and wrote about this on his Myspace?

    Uh yeah. Real winner there.

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