The Year Is Running Out

When Jennifer Lopez gave birth to her twins back in February she told the world, or at least those who shelled out $5 to see her airbrushed photos in People that she was going to complete a triathlon by the end of the year. Wanting to one up that other Scientology princess at her own game, a triathlon seemed best at the time. Now, there are just a few months left in the year, but apparently she is going to do it. The only thing that is holding the entire process up is finding a swimmer to replace her during the swim, a bicyclist to tow her and a weightlifter who will carry her during the run.

Now, she never promised us an Ironman Triathlon, but I will still be shocked to see her do it. I'm surprised she has even brought it up. She could have just ignored it and everyone would have forgotten until someone else brought up some stupid athletic promise.

"It's really tiring and like spending time with the babies... it's really challenging. But if I have to crawl across that finish line, I'm going to crawl across that finish line. It's for the kids. I keep telling myself that when I'm training, I'm like, 'This is for charity, your kids are going to know about this. Don't embarrass the family. Really get it done, Lopez'."

I don't think she has been training for it. Sure, she has probably got on the treadmill a few times, and maybe she has taken a spinning class or two, and even done a few laps in the hot tub while running away from Skeletor. The problem is, she never leaves her house and this whole triathlon thing takes place outside in real water and on real roads.

There is not a triathlon that takes place in indoor pools and on exercise equipment is there? Maybe the first annual Marc Anthony, "My Wife Did It" Triathlon, held in their Long Island Rec Room.