Wednesday, December 10, 2008

Maybe Xenu Has It


According to Canada's National Post, Tom Cruise has dispatched assistants throughout Toronto searching for a missing Blackberry. That's right, Tom Cruise has lost his Blackberry. I don't even want to know what is in it. I would love to speculate what's in it though. Can you imagine if someone had the balls to actually post online everything found in that Blackberry. That would be priceless. I know of course it would be a violation of Tom's privacy but it would be really interesting to see what he had on there besides phone numbers. Oh, think of the crank call possibilities for the first few days. It would not take long for everyone to get new numbers but in the meantime, have you ever wanted to call Leah Remini's house in the middle of the night? Would you like to have some one on one time with Katie Holmes and find out what in the hell she is really doing with Tom? I don't even want to think about the e-mails he has on there or possibly photos. This, if true would be the most viewed item in the history of the internet. The stories would go on for months and months.

I'm surprised he doesn't have some kind of stress meter attached to it so when someone picks it up it automatically sends a signal to the grave of L Ron which immediately sends out a signal to everyone in Scientology that someone unauthorized has picked up the phone of Tom Cruise. OK, probably not, but this story is fun and I so much want it to be true.

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