Funny, But Probably Not True
The NY Post has a little blurb this morning about John Mayer and what he did for the one birthday he spent with Jessica Simpson. Well, actually he didn't spend it with her because he was on tour. The Post says that Jessica had a party at Ken Paves house and that at some point during the party a gift arrived from John. What was the gift? A DVD of John on tour which Jessica then proceeded to play on a loop all night so she could be with him. Uh huh.
So, lets analyze this. Would John Mayer send a DVD of himself on tour as a birthday present? I think we can all agree he would do that. There is no one John loves more than John himself. Would Jessica put a DVD on a loop all night so she could see him? I think she would do that. I can see her saying it. It doesn't mean she was sitting in front of the television watching it all night with some blank look in her eyes. Lots of people play CD's in a loop, and I'm guessing if you have a child there may have been purely by accident a time that you put a DVD on a loop for your child. Purely by accident though.
The thing that seems not very John like is that he sent it to Ken Paves house. That part seems kind of odd. I think it is a great tale, but I think that because she got dumped on her birthday eve that people were looking for some other birthday stories about her they could share.
to quote the great Yoda:
ReplyDeleteCaring , I am not.
just one more way to keep her name in the press. I think Pimpa Joe sent the DVD and then leaked the story. Tony's been out and about and poor Jess is left to tweeting about how glad she is to be another year older. I didnt even know she could count that high!
ReplyDeletepoor girl can't catch a break. i say let her mourn the loss of her relationship in peace. regardless of how we may feel about her, she must be hurting right now and it must suck to see all the made up crap in the tabs.
ReplyDeleteAm I the only one who feels utterly sorry for Jessica Simpson? She's just become such a sad, pathetic caricature of a woman. She needs some full-power female friends who call her on her obsessive boy nonsense, boost her confidence, and get her out from under Papa Joe's thumb. She seems like she'd be a lot of fun if she just had a little self-confidence.
ReplyDeleteInstead of saying "Eeeewww!" to that alleged Mandy Moore (or whomever's) come-on that was a Blind last year, she should try some full-on female/female action for once!
ReplyDeleteIt might empower her or at least expand her sadly small mind for once (as well as give a huge eff-you to dear ol' Dad...)
I agree with you Miranda...my God, I'd be mortified if all my break ups were in the press!!!! It's bad enough that everybody at the tavern knows!!
ReplyDeleteSo will she be replacing Jennifer Aniston as the new tabloid "sad, divorced lady?" I wish I were sad, divorced and had millions of dollars to throw away on pretty pool boys.
ReplyDeletewell said Miranda! i concur, i don't care to hear all the BS.
ReplyDeleteMaybe I'm the slow one in the class(which I highly doubt), but why exactly are were supposed to feel bad for her? She cheated on her husband with a couple of losers the minute she got mainstream popularity and a few movie deals. Now she's the butt of jokes about her disasterous love life in the tabloids. I guess I am missing where I am supposed to feel bad for her.
ReplyDeleteI want to dislike her, I do. But everytime I see her I just want to pat her on the head and tell her to go and buy an ice-cream. I guess it is the mom in me but that child needs some serious help finding a nice guy. Obviously she has no idea what one acts like.
ReplyDeletethey deserve eachother
ReplyDeleteAhaha! I really got a kick out of this. If John really did that, I can't decide if he was having a laugh at her expense or if he's really just that much of an egotistical jerkwad. For some reason, if it's the former, I kinda admire the fecking BALLS. Unbelievable. Having anyone on a string like that prolly gets old fast.
ReplyDeleteI wouldn't put it past JM to put this story out there himself. I would guess that he is trying to cultivate a bad-boy-that-no-woman-can-have mystique.
ReplyDeleteBut yeah, who cares. I doubt she's all that desperate or miserable, just kind of clueless.
Really tho, it must feel pretty bad to have had some measure of fame, and then to grasp so desperately at it as it as you age (by H'wood standards) and the acclaim fades away.
ReplyDeleteYes, in the grand scheme of things I realize it's not exactly huge suffering. But I just kinda feel sorry for her and others like her. And then I always think the same thing: gather all your money, put it in the hands of a very good, honest financial planner, leave LaLa Land, and go live a comfortable life somewhere away from the spotlight. She's never have to work again if she played it right.