Parenting Advice From Michael Lohan To Jon Gosselin

When I saw that Michael Lohan and Jon Gosselin were double dating in the Hamptons this week, my first thought was, "wow, my life is complete, and when did The Hamptons turn into Dewey beach?" I kid. I kid. I mean there are very few confluences of nature that would allow for this type of low rent gossip love. The forces of nature, or in this case Star Magazine have brought together the two guys you would least like to spend time with. I'm sure Michael feels like he can provide some great parenting advice to Jon. It probably goes a little something like this.

Michael: Here's what you do Jon. You line all the kids up and see if any have shred of talent. Then you quit your job and you take them around to casting call after casting call until they are getting some work. Don't let them stop working until they are paying all your bills. Let them hang out with drug dealers and mess up their life if they want. The only thing that matters is that they keep earning for you. Now you are lucky. You have 8 to choose from. I only had four and I had to work hard to make a living off Lindsay.

Jon: Dude. Look at my new Ed Hardy shirt. I got it for free. Oh, and I have two girls fighting to have sex with me even though I have 8 kids, no job, hair plugs and am out of shape and overweight.

Michael: Does Ed Hardy make a fishnet t-shirt? I need a new one. I have been working on my pecs and stretched out my old one. The ladies love that shirt. You should hear the sounds they make when they see Mikey rolling by in that shirt.

On this trip to The Hamptons Jon wasn't accompanied by his 22 year old girlfriend but instead was with that woman from Star he was hanging out with over the weekend. Do you want to know what kind of person Kate Major is? She is friends with Michael Lohan. Yeah, that should tell you that when is giving quotes to magazines the past day or so calling Jon her boyfriend that she probably has one agenda in mind. Her own.

"I didn't mean it to happen, it just did. I went to do a story on Jon and ended up falling for him."

I think she ended up falling for the fact that she would like to be on the front cover of the magazine she works for instead of writing for it.

Hailey Glassman is back at home in Manhattan still wanting to be a stepmother and wondering if she should have told Jon about the whole option thing. It looks like he is exercising one of his options this week. I hope when he exercises it he is wearing protection because the last thing this guy needs is more kids.