Johnny Depp & Vanessa Paradis Have Split

One thing I will say for Kneepads, they rarely go for the good gossip, preferring instead to kiss as much publicist butt as possible, but when they do, they are always right. Their cover story this week is all about Johnny Depp and Vanessa Paradis and how they live separate lives and how after 13 years of being together, it is over. So, dig through your closet and find your best clothes because you never know when you will have your chance to get some one on one time with Mr. Depp. You might even want to clean the dust off your well worn VHS copy of Private Resort and explain to those younger than you what exactly a VHS is. Oh, while you are at it, cassettes too. Don't bother to explain an 8 track because you will just blow their mind and look at you like you came from the future.

I guess the cleaned up Johnny Depp knows he needs to do something to look nice for the ladies. He is just like any guy. Let yourself go to hell after you find someone and when they dump you for passing out on the sneeze guard at their sister's wedding, then you clean yourself up and drop one or two pounds.