Blind Item #5
This former B- list mostly television actor who was on a hit show that ended quite some time ago now does very little for a living. He has a show but doesn't have to do much. Anyway he was drunk at a party this past week with a woman on either knee and was telling the group that he took the anal virginity of this A+ list celebrity/singer while she was engaged to her current celebrity husband.
Kirk Cameron
ReplyDeleteMariah Carey
Nick Cannon
Don't laugh but I thought of Chace Crawford and Carrie Underwood.
ReplyDeleteWait a cotton pickin'... Isn't Kirk Cameron all super evangelical though?
ReplyDeleteMatt Leblanc for the actor? No idea on the singer
ReplyDeleteDammit Kristen! But Kirk is probably wrong the other 2 def!
ReplyDeleteMehki Phifer & Beyonce??
ReplyDeleteGot to be wilmer valderama - sounds like his mo. Don't know who victim was.
ReplyDeletethat one is tempting!
ReplyDeleteWilmer for the guy. Current show he doesn't have to do much (voiceover).
ReplyDelete@ Bacon Ranch - Yep. "Handy Manny"
DeleteLOL Where the hell did Kirk Cameron come from? That made ma giggle
ReplyDeleteNic Cannon was in Chgo last wknd at Underground Bar dj'ing. He seems to be away from Ms. Carey alot
ReplyDeleteDammit texas rose
ReplyDeleteShit Bacon - I would have posted 5 minutes earlier except I had to google the dick and get the pricks name right. I really want to know who was the backdoor virgin that got her dirtchute paved.
DeleteMekhi Phifer
ReplyDeleteActor
Mekhi Thira Phifer is an American actor. He portrayed Dr. Greg Pratt on NBC's long-running medical drama ER and had a co-starring role opposite Eminem in the feature film 8 Mile. Wikipedia
Born: December 29, 1974 (age 38), New York City, NY
Height: 5' 9" (1.76 m)
Parents: Rhoda Phifer
Spouse: Reshelet Barnes (m. 2013), Malinda Williams (m. 1999–2003)
Children: Omikaye Phifer, Mekhi Thira Phifer Jr
Welp. Unless Mekhi was cheating on a wife he just married this year, can't be him...
Omg, it is Wilmer, isn't it? Tragic.
ReplyDeleteOh goody, anal virginity story.
ReplyDeleteI suck at finding the word clues inside the story :/
ReplyDeleteBut Kirk Cameron is so much more fun to picture. You know he took a scalding shower after and softly weeped until The Lord savior forgave him for his transgression.
ReplyDelete@kristin.. lol you just forced my mind to replay that scene from Da Vinci code with that albino monk in the shower
ReplyDeleteCue Count in 3...2...1...
ReplyDeleteI think the key is now "he has a show but doesn't have to do much".
ReplyDeleteGuesses for A+ celeb/singer???
ReplyDeleteThat pup is adorable, SaintsFan! What kind?
ReplyDeleteWell by not having to do much, I think that's where the voicework comes in. All he has to do is cruise in for probably 30 minutes of the day and read lines into the mic.
xoxo
Ravens fan
Mariah Carey and Nick is the correct answer for the couple.
ReplyDeleteThis comment has been removed by the author.
ReplyDeletewere Mariah and Wilmer hanging out around the Nick-engagement time?
ReplyDeletematt le blanc was my first thought, he doesnt do much for that show episodes, right? mariah carey doesnt strike me as the virgin type though... at least not while she was engaged to nick canon
ReplyDeleteGiggling like a maniac over the Kirk Cameron guess, and even more so at the idea of him crying in the shower!
ReplyDeleteI got nothing. None of the gueses seem spot on for me but this is a juicy bi, Enty. I hope you will grace us with a reveal on this one.
ReplyDeleteProbably Wilmer and Carrie Underwood. Her husband is a sports guy - that's a celeb to Enty.
ReplyDeleteKloie - makes for a juicier blind than Mariah imho.
DeleteYeah, where's The Count? Right up his alley here!
ReplyDeleteRenoblondee - you mean right up his hershey highway:)
DeleteThis comment has been removed by the author.
ReplyDeleteHere I am.
ReplyDeleteAnal virginity is the only virginity worth taking. Take the other one and it might be difficult to shake the broad. Plus, by the time she's getting her chocolate cherry popped, she likely knows how to move and fuck, so it will be a better time for you.
You have to make it special though, no drunken doggy style butthole surprise. Wine, candles, bath, massage, salad tossing, slow and loving strokes in that O-ring. Also best to give the chick an orgasm ahead of time as that helps relax everything down there.
Have a vibe on hand too. Not to DP her, to work on the clit while pumping her posterior. The ensuing assgasm is a remarkable thing to experience. It may take a while for the orifice to release you, as it can clamp down pretty tight, but that is fine since it allows for cuddle time when you can stroke her hair, caress her body and tell her how good it was and how wonderful she is to have shared that with you.
Just like regular fucking, the more enjoyable you make a broad's first backdoor experience, the more likely she will want to experience it again. With any luck you can turn her into a Dirtpipe Diva.
Easy there, Miss Rose. You wanna fuck my butt it will only happen if I am the meat in an anal sandwich. Also, the strap can me no larger than my own dick, so you may have to cut one down and carve a new head on it.
ReplyDeleteCount - just a little wordplay- no disrespect intended- I will defer all anal expertise to your capable hands/fingers.
DeleteOh, and I'll guess Wilmer, in the Marmont, with an 8-ball.
ReplyDeleteMariah and Nick were never really publicly engaged though. They just stated dating and all of a sudden they were married and no one they were dating. And nick had more than one show still on the air that he is the host of. So this doesn't really fit them. I also don't think nick should be considered A list because none of his shows are that big, he's more famous and powerful because of his marriage to her. I like the Beyonce guess better.
ReplyDeleteJust noticed it doesn't refer to the husband as an A lister. But nick and Mariah were still never really engaged, didn't they supposedly only date for like 6-8 weeks before they got married? Just doesn't seem to fit. Carrie could be a good guess but chase is supposedly gay so he wouldn't be the tv actor the right?
ReplyDelete@Bacon, she was a lab mix. Passed away last April. I used to take her on that hiking trail and it was her favorite.
ReplyDeleteDon't forget the tongue, Texas. It is as important to the tush as it is the cooch.
ReplyDeleteScott Baio.
ReplyDeleteKirk Cameron wouldn't be taking anything. He would be giving it.
ReplyDeleteWhy?? Why is it always the bum?? Why???
ReplyDeleteOh Saintsfanm I'm so sorry to hear that. Beautiful dog and beautiful path
ReplyDelete@TTM: Cause chicks nowadays give up the pussy for 2 glasses of wine and an appetizer at Ruby Tuesdays. Not that I have a problem with that.
ReplyDeleteThe butt is a fun challenge once you are comfortable and know you are otherwise sexually compatible. Then there is the taboo naughtiness of it, so it makes it kinky. Plus it is a different feel, both in and around.
Those are just where I'm coming from. Dude like Wilmer it is probably an attempt to "use" a chick to the fullest extent and something fun to tell his friends the next night out at the club. Coke Narcissist thing.
Allow me to speak for everyone, Count: you are dating the wrong women
ReplyDeleteTell me about it, TTM. A lifetime of Mrs. Wrongs while on the quest for Mrs. Right. Only other option is to date dudes, but I have no interest in man ass or learning how to give a BJ.
ReplyDeleteAt the time this occurred I think it was Avril.
ReplyDelete