Friday, July 03, 2009

Amy Winehouse Banned From Swimming - Not From Meeting Kendra


If the resort where Amy Winehouse is staying keeps banning her from certain activities, the only thing left for her to do all day will be to drink and do drugs. See, she is already doing those things but they don't take up her entire day or night. Nope. She finds at least an hour a day to sleep and another hour a day or so for other activities. Previously these other activities included playing is this the crack house, whereby she would go knocking on the doors of the other guests and asking if they had any crack. When the hotel banned her from that practice she started rounding up stray dogs from across the island and letting them sleep in her room. When they needed to go outside she let them all out at once and they terrorized the other guests. So, guess what? Yep, banned from having any more dogs or pets in her room. What is left? Well yesterday they banned her from actually swimming in the pool. I can't imagine anyone wanting to go in the pool after she has been in there, but it wasn't a hygiene ban. Instead it was a safety ban. There is apparently no lifeguard at the pool and one of Amy's favorite games other than Scrabble is Marco Polo and so she gets liquored up and then jumps in the pool in the middle of the night and plays by herself. Loudly. That wasn't the problem either. The problem was that when Amy was swimming at night, then the next morning she would be found in the grass next to the pool passed out. The hotel is scared she will drown and so have banned her from using the pool unless she isn't drunk. So, in effect a total ban.

Of course she could solve all these what to do during the day issues if E! would only find her and let her hang out with Kendra and Hank. If you were a producer of Kendra's show wouldn't you go make every effort to find Amy and have the pair meet? I would love, love for them to play Scrabble against each other.


17 comments:

  1. hopefully she'll ignore the ban and be found face down in the pool.

    i'm so sick of this bitch.

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  2. Why doesn't the hotel ask her to check out and leave the premises?

    Her behavior must be detrimental to business, I wouldn't want to watch this drunken nightmare of a woman stumble around followed by a pack of flea ridden stray dogs.

    Is the hotel sure she can pay her bill?

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  3. she WAS too talented for this shit. now i don't think she's got any thing left in her but drugs, alcohol and self loathing.

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  4. if i were at the hotel i would be SCREAMING for a refund.

    nancer, cold man, colllld.

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  5. kitty litter I agree with you.

    nancer please don't wish her dead, if she dies of drugs or suspicion due to drugs, she will just get more sympathy.

    I can't bare having her in the news everyday like we are now doing for celebrities who die under the influence of street or prescription drugs.

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  6. LOL I would love to see Amy and Kendra hang out too Enty! would definitely tune in for that!

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  7. Well, even on her worst cracked-out day, drunk off her ass, Wino could sound more intelligent than Kendra.

    And please for the love of all that is holy do not make Kendra laugh. Sheesh.

    But her hubby sure is hot!

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  8. now you KNOW e! is there pitching a reality show idea to her...

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  9. She needs some type of handler. Couldn't they arrest her for public drunkeness or something? Did her family wash their hands of her?

    She needs an intervention. Where is Dr.Drew?

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  10. Kendra playing scrabble with anyone would be funny.

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  11. That's a good question, where are her parents?

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  12. can't say i disagree with ya on that point Nancer!

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  13. Look at the ABS on her! What kind of crack addict has abs like that???

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  14. Amy's dad was there on the island with her for a while, but he basically threw up his hands and said there's nothing more I can do; she is a grown woman and will do as she pleases. Unfortunately, if she is "just" an addict and isn't also bipolar or mentally gravely disabled like Brit Brit, I don't think he can put her under a conservatorship. Just look at all the addicted homeless wandering the streets of your average city.

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  15. she had a promising start but that's all she ever had. the only thing anyone thinks of when they see her name now is what a train wreck she is.
    she'll blow (or snort or drink or shoot) through the money eventually.

    as for abs, all i see is a bloated little tummy when she's standing or walking. she's got to be malnourished unless alcohol and crack have nutritional value.

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  16. well, there is usually fruit in those resort drinks, so at least she shouldn't be suffering from scurvy.

    ABS- anti-lock braking system?

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