Tuesday, October 27, 2009

Bradley Cooper To Mark Philippoussis Isn't Much Of An Upgrade


Here is a new rule of life to live by. Never marry someone who hosted a reality show where 20 people were all vying for their attention. This is especially true if you are a woman marrying a guy who had a show. Would you marry Bret Michaels? Didn't think so. Flavor Flav? Probably not. So, why on earth would Jennifer Espositio marry Mark Philippoussis? Mark's spokespeople say he is engaged. Jennifer's spokespeople had no comment and are probably as shocked as I am. He once starred in a show where he had to choose between 20 year old kittens and 40 year old cougars. I don't remember much about the show except that it seemed like he had sex with lots of them. Oh, and then he picked one of them to be his future wife and that ended. He has dated Tara Reid. I mean this guy doesn't seem like a lets get married one woman for the rest of my life kind of guy.

I'm such a f**king gossip expert that I didn't even know the 32 year old tennis player was dating Jennifer. I like Jennifer. I have had a crush on her since Spin City. To see her go from Bradley Cooper to Mark just seems like more of the same. She can do so much better. He had sex with Tara Reid. Hello. If you already had one marriage which is in the same ballpark as the length of Britney's first marriage then you really need to be more choosy the next time. Marrying Mark is not being choosy it is a divorce waiting to happen when he cheats on you from the road or at home or any other place he can find a cougar or kitten.


14 comments:

  1. If he's 100% straight and not abusive he MIGHT be an upgrade?

    ReplyDelete
  2. Anonymous11:13 AM

    He also dated Paris Hilton. Just saying.....

    ReplyDelete
  3. I always liked her too.

    ReplyDelete
  4. Jennifer, Jennifer, Jennifer...the first time is for love, the second time is for money! That's what my Nana told me.

    ReplyDelete
  5. i have no idea wth this guy is...but those dimples are the yum. i wouldn't mind waking up to them, i imagine jennifer thinks the same.

    ReplyDelete
  6. Anonymous11:42 AM

    He dated the Parasite and Tara....I see sirens hahahaha

    ReplyDelete
  7. Cro-magnon eyebrows. Michael K would have a field day with them.

    ReplyDelete
  8. She was only married to BC for 4 months. I think Britney and KoverFed lasted longer than that.

    ReplyDelete
  9. @Sunny I think he means Brit's Vegas wedding to a friend that lasted about 48hrs.

    Ms. Espositio could do SO much better.

    There are other fish in the sea Jen --- you need to stop fishing in loser swamp.

    ReplyDelete
  10. Mark's definitely straight but definitely not marrying material. When it hit the headlines here in Oz about a month ago it was definitely wtf. I just love that it took US a month to pick up on their engagement.

    ReplyDelete
  11. Philippoussis: is that his name or occupation?

    ReplyDelete
  12. Anonymous4:48 PM

    He was a talented tennis player who was too caught in fame and fortune to take his career seriously. Earlier this year, his home in Australia (where he's from) was in foreclosure or about to go into it.

    Yes, he's a real catch. (rolls eyes)

    ReplyDelete
  13. He also got hurt a lot, but he was yummy to watch play tennis (along with Patrick Rafter!)

    ReplyDelete
  14. He appeared on A Current Affair in Australia moaning about how broke he was: he couldn't pay his mortgage repayments, he had no income and was living with his mother at her place. He was blaming it on bad management - maybe it had something to do with having a bad temper, matching attitude, mediocre talent and BIG BIG ego. Not a very popular guy in Aus.

    ReplyDelete