Tuesday, July 20, 2010

Excuse Me Sir. The Bulge Under Your Shirt Is Moving


Note to self. Next time I try and smuggle 18 monkeys into Mexico, do not try and out them under my shirt and hope no one notices. A man from Lima Peru was stopped at the Mexico City airport yesterday when officials in customs noticed that his shirt was moving. Noting there was no fan or other hurricane like breeze zipping through the terminal, officials suspected something was amiss.

When they asked the man what he was hiding, he lifted his shirt and revealed 18 baby titi monkeys. He had them stuffed into pockets in a girdle he was wearing. Two of them had died during the trip, but the other 16 endangered animals were alive and being cared for by animal control workers. The man said that he put them in his pockets because they had been in his suitcase but he thought that the x-ray machine might kill them so he took them out. When did he take them out? Did no one see him get on the plane like this? He kept them quiet the entire flight? The man said he paid $30 each for the monkeys.

They sell for about $1,000 on the open market. The two that died were in his socks.


18 comments:

  1. This would be hilarious if two of the monkeys hadn't died.


    Wow! The stupid things that people will do to make a quick buck.

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  2. Titi monkeys!!! The name alone is ultra cute!

    Now seriously, this is disgusting.
    In his socks? And what happened to the man, I hope they didn't just let him go.

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  3. I am amazed he made it as far as he did without being caught. How did no one notice?

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  4. "he lifted his shirt and revealed 18 baby titi monkeys" Did anyone else read that and snicker with another version of "titi" on their mind or I'm I the only sick one?

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  5. and you just know he will get a slap on the wrist for this offense and be on his way.

    ugh.

    taking anything that is endangered should be a big fucking deal and carry maximum sentences, but alas, animal cruelty issues always seem to be dealt with lightly.

    if i had my way i would find a huge giant and stuff this asshole in HIS sock and see how HE liked it.

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  6. yes, giants need to exist so that this can happen :P

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  7. Patty, no my mind always goes to those places right away.

    The only place I've seen somebody with their clothes moving was on the NY subway. Long story.

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  8. What Jasmine said. I'm sick of this shit and don't find it funny AT ALL.

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  9. Poor animals. Can anyone imagine the heat from Peru to Mexico between that guy's shirt? I'm more amazed that only two died.

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  10. I find absolutely nothing at all "hilarious" about this situation, but I also think it's stupid to pay thousands of dollars for any animal -- endangered OR domestic -- when there are millions of critters languishing in shelters all over the country. But maybe that's just me.

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  11. "...there was no fan or other hurricane like breeze zipping through the terminal..." Maybe it was a titi twister? (Sorry!)

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  12. Off to Pervian jail....say hello to Joran Van der Slut for us.

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  13. He'd get WAYYYYY more than a slap on the wrist if I was in charge of dealing with his ass.

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  14. Echo all of those who do not find this funny in the least.

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  15. Agreed. Dead animals = not funny.

    Get a real fucking job, you lowlife.

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  16. No one is making fun of the animal suffering, only the guy's abject idiocy.

    There's enough animal and human suffering in the world to swamp us. A little bit of humor can help us survive.

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  17. Yeah, humor is definitely important in this narcissistic, greedy, fucked up world -- but this isn't farcical. It HAPPENED. Smuggling endangered animals isn't funny, and it's certainly not riotous when a few die en route.

    It's cool. I'm just glad I'm not desensitized.

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