Tuesday, August 21, 2012

Edinburgh Fringe Festival - Celebrities


More from Amanda at Edinburgh Fringe.

There are two kinds of celebrity sightings at the Comedy Fringe. (Before I continue, I promise I will try and get some actual photos of celebs in the next few days)

1. The real celebrity sighting- Given the amount of people, well like EVERYWHERE, it is always surprising that celebrities, even big ones, can walk down the street relatively unnoticed. In the years I have come here, people like Damien Lewis, Emma Thompson, John Malkovich, Sam Waterston, Ricky Gervais, Ian McKellen just walk by, totally unmolested. Everyone else is too busy being distracted by the craziness. Only the lucky few will even notice them walk by. That doesn’t mean they never get recognised- they do, especially in bars where there is less distraction. So far this year my celebrity spottings have included:

-BBC legend Nicholas Parsons (he must be about 80) walked by me in a venue (slowly, with a cane), and a fan (lady, about 75 years old) jumped on top of him with excitement. No joke. We all thought he was going down. I had my phone out ready to call for an ambulance.

-Greg Proops bombing it around the edge of George Square just before his show

-Stephen K Amos in the Loft Bar at Gilded Balloon, Teviot

-Richard Bacon and his unbelievably adorable 9 month old baby boy Arthur

-Amy Lame near the Meadows

-Sue Perkins getting ready to do a piece-to-camera right outside St. Giles Cathedral

-Jeffrey Archer looking lost (let’s hope he stayed that way)

-Politician David Blunkett- and this really happened - who I totally thought was staring at my boobs till I remembered he is blind.

2. The ‘holy crap, is that (insert name here)?’ speculation-game sighting. These are much more fun. These usually happen in the bars, or in the queues that proceed each show. There’s a lot of people standing around at the venues, drink in hand, paying no attention to the conversations they are in because they are too busy looking out for famous people. And there are both famous people and people who look like famous people EVERYWHERE. This has happened three times to me already- one guy looked like Perry Farrell (I must admit falling victim to the game because I am such a huge Jane’s Addiction fan, and nearly had a heart attack), and another, who I am pretty sure was Skillrex, but I cannot be certain. People around him were freaking out. Yesterday I thought the guy smoking next to me was Ian McCulloch (can you guess my age yet?) till I heard his disappointingly not-Scouse accent.

Of course, I have three ultimate celebrity sightings I really want this year- Rich Hall, who has been one of my favourites since about 1984; Eddie Izzard, whose protege Trevor Noah is performing, so it is not too unrealistic to hope to see him; and The Hoff, who will be here performing in a few days (bars are his natural habitat, so I remain optimistic). Rest assured, my children, that if I see any of them, there is little I wouldn’t do to get photos and perhaps an interview out of them. Yes, I will look like a fool, and probably spoil any chance I have of eventually settling down with Eddie in a slick NYC pad (second house in London) in a lifetime of blissful conversations where he pours me another glass of ridiculously priced (but organic, and diverting funds to poor orphans in Namibia) wine, and he says to me ‘Darling, you are the funniest, wittiest, most lovely girl. And what a rack. I am so lucky to have you in my lif-

Hang on, I’m digressing here. *ahem*.

The point is, I am willing to forgo all this happiness with Eddie, just so all you fellow CDAN readers might get a little personal attention from him. You’re welcome.


27 comments:

  1. Greg Proops? I haven't seen him in forever - used to love him on Whose Line Is It Anyway

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  2. I barely recognized any of those names. Sorry.

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  3. I like Greg Proops too, what does bombing it mean? At least I recognize his name. I love the writing and look forward to more updates.

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  4. LURVE Eddie Izzard...

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  5. good job! thanks! good luck with Eddie!

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  6. As much as I love Eddie, I am willing to share him with you just for your description of your future life together. How could I deny anyone such bliss?

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  7. Thanks for taking one for the CDAN team with Eddie...LOL Loving your updates and thank you so much for sharing! Enty - thank you too!

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  8. I have no idea who any of those people are, but it sounds like you're having fun so carry on!

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  9. Nicholas Parsons is about 86 and still working, god love him.
    I can't Sue Perkins. I hope lorry came by and splashed her.

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  10. Just checked, Mr Parsons is 90 next year.

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  11. Amanda, you're my kind of girl! Not been to Edinburgh for a year or two, but I share your taste. Seen Rich hall many times. My sightings over a decade or so:

    Noel Fielding outside the Pleasance sucking a lollypop (there were women fainting....)

    Alan Davis in the audience for a play

    Matt Lucas in full costume (some sort of princess with full skirts and hat) getting soaked in heavy rain in a taxi queue. He was behind us and i still feel guilty for not letting him in front. God knows how he got the dress dry. Very stoic, never complained.


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  12. Califblondy, bombing it, means rushing. Not sure if it is a British or a Scottish term

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  13. I would not let Damian Lewis walk by unmolested. Just saying.

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  14. Hi you guys! A few responses to comments, which you have been lovely to post!

    SusanB- If you love Whose Line, check out my upcoming review on Paul Merton's show in like two days. Basically the same thing. X

    Meg- get out more. Wait, no, watch more tv.

    Califblondy- bombing it is running. Thanks for the kindness- glad you are enjoying it!

    Domestic (design) Chicky, timebob, Maja Witha J., Stacey Charter and Angus Parvo- let's do drinks like ASAP.

    ms_wonderland- You had me at Noel Fielding sucking a lolly.

    Yvie- thanks! British.

    Momster- Right with you babes. I touched his arm once. It was nice.

    Jax- I don't think I will see him! Besides I am a Stephen Merchant girl. Smerch is the sweetest thing ever. X

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  15. Oh, and Andrea- thanks for doing Parsons google! You are fab!!!

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  16. I had to google Jeffrey Archer - the only one I know with that name is the author. I don't care for thrillers but was bewildered by the comment. Didn't realize there's a Jeffrey Archer who is a British politician, a rather shady one evidently.

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  17. Trevor Noah is hilarious. Wishing him well.

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  18. Love me some Eddie

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  19. Amanda - I'm really enjoying your posts! Please get some secret pics of these goofy celebs or just goofy pics of crazy peeps on the street. We live vicariously through you!

    Love me some Eddie too! You should jump on him like that other lady did to Mr. Parsons.

    Enjoy!

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  20. SusanB - your two Jeffrey Archers are the same person! His life has more twists than one of his pulp novels.

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  21. Anonymous2:51 PM

    Can't wait until the celebs are saying:
    "Holy crap - is that? Wait..? No.. it is isn't it? It's Amanda from CDAN! No f***ing way! I'm like a TOTAL fan! Can we get a picture? Hey, you there - you, who looks a bit like Ricky Gervaise, get a photo of us!"

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  22. My Eddie Izzard brush with fame:

    Went to LA to see him in "Circle" and through my connections got in the audiences at Politically Incorrect and the Craig Kilborn show (tells ya how long ago this was). In the PI audience, there were others that had come just because Eddie was on the panel and we cheered wildly when he was introduced znd they mentioned his show.

    The next night, I went to CK. When Kilborn mentioned that Eddie was in town for his tour, I expected the same wild applause as at PI so I yelled out "YEAH!" and clapped. NOBODY ELSE DID. Craig and Eddie both looked in the direction I was sitting and Craig said something like "They know your show!" and Eddie said drolly, "Well, one person does."

    When I got home and watched the tape of the show, you can hear me shout "YEAH!" and clap! When I went on Eddie's website to talk about seeing the show, etc., I told this story and the other fans said they wished they were me because he acknowledged me. LOL

    I later wrote about DTK coming out on DVD and I know that his people have used it in promotional materials.

    That's probably as close to Eddie that I'm getting :-D

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  23. @nunaurbiz, that was hilarious ! He cracks me up .

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  24. I did a show in the 2008 Edinburgh Fringe - I met Joan Rivers in the lounge of the Balmoral Hotel. She was quite nice and chatted a bit. And I saw Orlando Bloom walking on the Royal Mile.

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  25. I am SO jealous ~ sounds like you are having an AMAZING time! What I wouldn't give to see Eddie Izzard, AHHHHHHH!!! And The Hoff? Wow. That would definitely be a celebrity sighting :)

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  26. Love Nicholas Parsons--go to an "evening with" if he's doing it this year. And what's Arthur Smith doing this time around?

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  27. ugh love me some Eddie Izzard

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