Thursday, April 03, 2008

Ummm. Do You Smell That?


Do you smell it? Smells like manipulation to me. Lots and lots of photos of Tom and Suri Cruise out at the playground. Problem is they were all taken last Tuesday. Today is Thursday. So unless they were taken by some guy on a family vacation who still hasn't mastered the digital age and used film, these photos are a setup. I have no doubts they are a highly paid setup, as the words that Bauer Griffin uses to describe them is nothing short of Kneepaddish which is often the case when someone says there are more where they came from if you give us a crapload of money right now and say nice things.

I don't know if Suri is talking right now but you know she must have been asking why she was the only kid at the playground who was wearing a dress, and why dad was always posing with her so his bright shiny wedding ring was being displayed. I love how they make all the photos look like they were taken from some pap photographer who no one saw, yet all the photos are posed. It is a nice touch. Hell, I wouldn't even put it past them to have built this playground in the back of Tom's house just so it looks like he is taking Suri places.

Does anyone find it odd that even though Katie has not done any work in six months that she couldn't find the time to head out on this family excursion? We have had separate Katie photos and separate Tom photos. No photos together since the double dates.

Anyway, if you want to see all the other candid photos, you can click here. If you decide to read Bauer Griffin's commentary which accompanies the photos, bring a barf bag, because it honestly puts People to shame. I have never seen so much kissing ass in one hundred words or less. They opened their mouths so wide they had room for the entire COS.

25 comments:

Shoko Valensi said...

is it weird that their playtime is only pics of them walking around? why is suri never on the swing or actually playing..did i miss some pics?

sauvage said...

Yaaa... If I had a daughter of that age, I'd sure have her wear WHITE to the playground, wouldn't we all?

jax said...

Suri version 1.0 hasn't been fitted with the Play program.
This problem should be fixed in time for version 2.0 that launches later this month.

DBF said...

That's one big "two year old". I don't know if the scientologists have a play program. I read that sci children are not allowed to play with toys but maybe that doesn't extend to playgrounds. I think it's interesting that the celeb sci spawn are never seen out together, like you never see a playdate with Suri and Ella Blue or even the Beckham kids or Willow Smith.

wildflower said...

There's one when they are heading towards the playground and Tommy-boy's looking at the camera like "Oh shit, do I really have to go over there and interact with people?" But of course he doesn't, because his kid never actually plays with the other kids. Just skirts around the whole area prancing and looking good for the camera. Poor kid.
And by kid, of course I mean robot/alien. ;)

Kristen S. said...

That kid ain't no alomst-2. That kid looks to be almost-3 or almost-4. Maybe you don't spend a lot of time around kids, ENT, but that kid is not how old they say she is.

Amber said...

I wouldn't even put it past them to have built this playground in the back of Tom's house just so it looks like he is taking Suri places.

I cracked up hard at that one hahahha

Do you think Tom's penis has ever been close to Katie's vag?

Irishstayc said...

lol jax! What are the chances that every single man woman and child in that playground is a scientoligist...hmmmmm.

And really not a lot of smiles from tommy boy or suri either... talk about forced

Little Miss Smoke and Mirrors said...

Suri's almost as tall as her "dad." And the reason she doesn't look "almost 2" is because she was born about 5-6 months earlier than they claim. She's got 6 months on Shiloh, not 6 weeks.

Angela said...

Kristen S. and DBF, thank you!! She is HUGE for two. I know that babies all vary but these are the same people that passed a child that was at least 4-months old off as a newborn. At the end of the day, it's all very sad.

jax said...

ya we all know Suri REALLY turned 2 in November/December.

Twisted Sister said...

Oh my God - the middle one on page 2 where he's look over like, "Are they catching this?" is funny -

BUT

this one takes the cake. His head is down as though he's looking at Suri, and his eyes are looking out like he's trying to catch who is watching.

http://bauergriffinonline.com/2008/04/suri-cruise-surfaces-with-tom.php?bfm_index=33&bfm_page=3


A tad too obvious????????????????

captivagrl said...

who believes this crap? who? his publicity stunts are lame. they(tom and katie) are setting up for something. we'll know soon enough. tom wants to be seen as doting daddy without katie?

Trix said...

Mark my words that lil baby has some Filipina in her.

Irishstayc said...

come to think of it on the age thing - wasn't she born the same day as Brooke Shield daughter? (or was it son?) I wonder what the size diff would be - ok off to find a pic of Brooke and child...

mngddess said...

First of all - that kid is 3 or almost 3. I still wouldn't be surprised if that guy Katie before Tom was the father.

And Jax, that was one of the funniest lines ever..V 2.0!! LOL

Irishstayc said...

Found a current pic of Grier - brookes daughter that she had on the same day as suri = BUT it's on wireimage so i can't get a good look. If anyone wants to see it it's from the Horton hears a who premiere at wire image - what do you think?

Grace said...

I too couldn't believe what Suri was wearing -- all the other kids on the playground are in jeans and t-shirts, but Suri is wearing a party dress. In white, no less. She sure stands out, doesn't she, for these "candid" photos?

Every day out with Suri is a photo op day. She is being paraded around like a monkey with an organ grinder.

If Tom really wanted to have Suri play, he would have dressed her up like the other kids and let her walk to the playground on her own, holding her hand.

As it is, this smothering of attention and having her stand out from the others in an all-white party dress is just accentuating her difference -- "I am American royalty..."

sheetrock said...

Everyone is talking about what Suri is wearing. What about Tom wearing Mr. Rogers' sweater? It's equally just as odd.

Alpine Summer said...

She's cute as can be, but way too big for not-quite-2.

As an aside, I laugh every time I see the Church of Scientology referred to as COS. Maybe it's just because I'm a Potter reader, but COS is also Chamber of Secrets . . . which fits nicely. That's where they've been keeping Suri.

francesca fiore said...

I'm behind the curve on the rumor mill, because I didn't know there was word out there that she was older than they claim... I kind of try not to pay attention to the Cruise. But YEAH that kid is ginormous for a two year old!! And we know her dad is not especially tall, so the genetics seem off somehow...

Even though I laugh at these guys, this makes me really sad. Like, isn't there anybody that loves that little girl? And feels really weird about this whole Easter dress playdate bullshit? Like her mother even? I do not get it. What is wrong with these people that they feel like it's ok to have a child solely to be used as a prop??

Grace said...

Granted, these rich, famous people can dress their kid any way they want -- and can afford to. But even Victoria Beckham dresses her boys like normal kids, and she's a fashionista.

I think the "where's Kate?" question is a bit of a drama here and not relevant.

But T is dressed wierdly. I don't know of any parent who wears a sweater and 'dress up' shoes to the playground.

How long were they there, I wonder?

All this would be for naught if Suri stayed for at least an hour and got really dirty and had a bunch of fun.

Ellebee said...

When my daughters were that young, they were always on the small side of the growth charts. However, I have had clients whose children were quite large for their ages-like wore size 3 or 4 toddler clothing and were much younger. I taught pre-school and operated a day care center.

I am willing to give the benefit of the doubt on this one, not knowing the genetic backgrounds of the parents.

Judi said...

Uh, no thanks.

Moonmaid said...

that kid does not look happy, and she isn't playing with any of the other kids.

Sad.