Friday, September 25, 2009

Four For Friday

This B+ television and movie actor has had some issues at home over the past year. A lot of it has had to do with his infidelity. Publicly everyone is getting along great. Behind the scenes though, our married actor has been having sex with the D list actress daughter of this A list actress. Oh, and our actor is also married to a C list actress.

#1 - B+ actor
#2 - D list actress having sex with B+ actor
#3 - A list mom
#4 - C list actress wife

Random Photos Part One

Top spot for Gerard Butler & Jon Bon Jovi. A random combination for sure and I don't think you will have any complaints. If you do, I think I might have some more pictures in here to make it up to you.
A picture of Bill Murray and an apple is probably not going to make it up to you. The goofiest smile ever though.
How about Bruce Willis and his wife? Does anyone else think she looks really similar to Demi?
So, if you shaved all of Rumer's hair off how close would she look to her dad?
Apparently someone just told a Billy Bob Thornton joke.
Cate Blanchett and her husband Andrew Upton.
Candace Cameron Bure looks great.
Even Denise Richards looks nice. I think I said two nice things about Denise this week. I need to make up for that somehow.
Gisele Bundchen walking down the street. Everyone excited now?
Oh, Hugh Jackman needed a ride and none of you volunteered? How could you leave the man to get around on his own?
Has anyone actually seen Extract because I am thinking about going this weekend?
Check out the shoes. Have you stopped laughing yet? I believe the current price on those shoes is $400, but the douchiness is priceless.
John Prendergast and Andie MacDowell. Oh and I had Bill Murray earlier. It is like Groundhog Day again but without the Groundhog or the drinking that I normally do to accompany a viewing of the movie.
Joe Perry still looking like a rocker. Close to a rocking chair, but still looking like a rocker.
I think Kristin Chenoweth is my new most likely to be invited to the basement.
Kathy Ireland with the big hair.
Some definite randomness. LaToya and AnnaLynne McCord.
Patrick Dempsey in Spain promoting Subaru.
Also in Spain is the Princess which makes sense since she lives there. Here she is thinking she is talking to her husband before she realizes, it is in fact, an actual mannequin.
Mickey Rourke goes for the sly crotch grab.
I still don;t understand the whole Rick Fox Eliza Dushku coupling. They seem like an odd match.
I always have room for Tia Carrere.
Vince is back. He is in a new movie with Jason Bateman.
One of the greatest bands ever. Wolfmother - Melbourne.

Bad Flirt Hits The Torrid Fashion Show - Maximum Snark

It seems like only a few months ago when the band from Montreal came to stay at my place for a week. Well, thanks to the invitation of my mom, they are back. This time though I told them they would have to earn their keep and sent them out last night to the Torrid Fashion Show which was at The Fashion Institute Of Design & Merchandising or FIDM. The entire event was used to showcase not only the work of FIDM students but also to raise money for breast cancer research and honor plus sized women and designers who make a difference. It is a great event.

Here is their report. They didn't take any pictures but I am going to try and find some from the event and post them later.

The FIDM breast cancer research fundraiser was a strangely put together affair that brought the likes of Carnie Wilson, David Hasselhoff, Brooke Hogan, Lisa Ann Walter and ANTM cycle 10 winner Whitney. So yes, it was a Michael K wet dream. It was put together by Torrid clothing, which you may know as basically a Wet Seal for plus sized girls. The night was a celebration of overcoming breast cancer and girls embracing their curves.

Brooke Hogan kicked off the event performing 4 terribly written, horrendously performed "songs" backed up by some greasy looking b-boys and some super awkward back up dancers with bad posture. Brooke breathlessly spoke to the audience about the importance of breast cancer research, but was mostly concerned with where her bottle of water had gone and that the LA air was 'messing with her voice' Brooke Hogan is a lot like the Staypuff Marshmallow man from Ghostbusters if the Staypuff Marshmallow man was an obnoxious airhead who couldn’t even lip sync for 6 minutes or remember where she put her water. Her nervous rambling in between songs was so dreadful it became hilarious. Her performance was not very current due to her channeling Britney circa 1998 with ridiculous costumes and dancing. C’mon Brooke!

David Hasselhoff was in tow to present a humanitarian award to his smarmy, dimwitted but well intentioned daughter. He seemed pretty drunk, but spoke audibly and wore a very slick grey suit and a super ugly hat that some stylist got for him. His daughter, who is currently the face of Torrid, has apparently become a role model to plus sized girls across the country because of her modeling and charity work.

The absolute highlight of the night was Lisa Ann Walter who also received a Humanitarian award. Walter is the producer and creator of the wonderful and inspiring "Dance Your Ass Off". She spoke about her weight battles with honesty and humour and dropped the only F bombs of the night. She also started crying at one point and they were genuine tears. An amazing woman.

Finally, some soon-to-be-shelved Fefe Dobson type took the stage to sing her terrible single “Dollhouse”. We didn’t hang around to watch that train wreck, opting instead to grab some of the free food and booze that was in constant supply all night and our swag bag which had a cool shirt but was completely offset by the fact there was an Ed Hardy sample sized perfume. Really? At a fashion show? Ed Hardy?

Your Turn

Over the past few weeks I have received lots of requests to have another anonymous week on Your Turn. People want to share things but want a place to do it where they can't be identified. So, since it has been awhile and there are lots of new readers since the last time, go ahead and reveal a secret you have not shared before or something else you would like to get off your chest or just vent about whatever you want. It is your forum so have at it. I will leave the anonymous feature on for a couple of days to let everyone have a chance.

Lee Greenwood Headed For Divorce #4 - Cheating On Wife #4

Talking about Lee Greenwood makes a nice change of pace. It is good to see the people who don't get in the news much be just as scandalous as everyone else. Greenwood who sings the song God Bless The USA was spotted leaving a Hilton hotel in Tennessee with an ex girlfriend and most definitely not his wife.

"The woman and Lee first dated a long time ago, but they've recently rekindled their relationship after she went through a divorce," a source confirmed to The Enquirer.

They have been seeing each other once a week for the past five months. Lee is currently married to a former Miss Tennessee who is also President of Lee's company so that won't be messy when they divorce. The Enquirer actually got a hold of the woman Lee has been cheating with who confirmed they had met at the hotel but had just been talking about her divorce. Uh huh.

Lee's people just said the woman is an old friend. They didn't even try and deny the story. I mean why even bother? The guy has been married four times and probably cheated on all of the wives so it isn't like this is anything new. I do hope he gets some kind of frequent divorce discount from his attorney though.

I'm Actually Supporting Aubrey O'Day

Tuesday was the debut of Aubrey O'Day in Peepshow which is the show on Vegas that also stars Holly Madison. During the show someone took a photo of Aubrey and Holly when they were topless and then of course posted them online. No big deal right? I mean each of them has been in Playboy and lots of people have seen them topless. I mean Aubrey barely wears any clothes when she is on a red carpet so this was nothing new.

Well, Aubrey didn't look perfect in her photo and some bloggers and one specifically that she mentions in the video said that she looked ugly her body looked horrible without retouching. According to Aubrey that made her feel really insecure about her body and she was going to quit the show and even took Wednesday night off from the show because of how bad the comments made her feel.

As I said yesterday I think all people men or women should feel comfortable in their own skin and there is absolutely nothing wrong with Aubrey's body. In her video she shows off her body and says that she is proud of it and that anyone who doesn't like it can f**k off.

Whatever you may think of Aubrey and hopefully you are not thinking of her too often, she at least is willing to stand up for how she feels about herself and is sending out a positive message to others about how they should feel when it comes to their bodies.

In the video she drops a couple of f bombs and also strips to a see through bra so you may want to think about that before watching it from work.

Michael Ausiello Blind Item

Being an insanely plugged-in member of this biz called show has its disadvantages. Case in point: I just found out that one of my favorite on-screen duos doesn’t get along in real life. Truth be told, they despise each other, and it’s causing serious conflict on the set.

According to a well-placed insider on this unnamed smash hit, the male half of this twosome claims his leading lady is unprofessional and extremely difficult to work with. Even worse, he has accused her of behaving “inappropriately” at times. He’s made it known to TPTB that he doesn’t want to be in scenes with her, least of all love scenes.

But there’s no getting around those anytime soon. “They told him the love scenes are unavoidable,” says my spy. “Their characters are supposed to be having a torrid affair.”

Agents for the pair are attempting to defuse the situation by promising to make sure both actors maintain professional standards in future scenes.

Care to guess the identity of the quarreling lovers? Head to the comments! (for Michael's comments click here)

Santa Monica Policemen Are Personal Bell Boys For LeAnn Rimes

I don't know how I missed these pictures from last week but they blow my mind. I am trying to think in what world I would ever have two policeman ever help me unload anything from my car and carry my suitcase and golf clubs for me. Well, I don't play golf anymore because I can't really get my hips to swing. I can play putt putt though as long as someone else picks up the ball for me out of the cup.

Anyway, here is LeAnn Rimes coming home after a vacation with her suitcase and golf clubs and the assistance of two Santa Monica policemen who apparently have nothing better to do than to help her with her bags and get her inside and maybe they can come back later and unpack her bags for her and mow the lawn and do some light house cleaning.

Obviously since there are pictures there must have been paps there and maybe they were driving by and saw LeAnn there and decided to help her out. I mean you never know how long her relationship with Eddie Cibrian is going to last and so the police want her to know they are always available. Oh, and Eddie's mom hates LeAnn and thinks she is a homewrecker so the end may come sooner than you think.

I have some trash that needs taking out when I get home. Do I call 911 for that or just flag down a cop? How exactly do they know to come over and do some of my chores?

Davy Jones Says His Wife Doesn't Beat Him Up And His Kids Love Her. Uh Huh

Remember The Monkees? How about that very special Brady Bunch episode with Davy Jones? Yeah, so Davy was the lead singer of The Monkees and he is 63. He got married last month to a woman who is 32 named Jessica Pacheco. Before getting married the couple were together about two years. According to recent reports it was alleged that Jessica had been beating up Davy on a pretty regular basis whenever he didn't do what she wanted.

This week in The Enquirer, Davy laughs at all of that and said, "Jessica is the love of my life. I've never been so happy." Of course if he had said anything else she would have beat the crap out of him later. Jessica says that she is thinking of giving up acting to join World Wrestling. Acting career? Have you heard of her?

So when Davy and Jessica got married last month none of his four daughters came to the wedding. Basically they were pissed that dad was marrying a 32 year old woman who beats him up and isn't their mom. Davy says that all his daughters love Jessica and they are happy but that all four of them had commitments they couldn't get out of.

That last line should show you why you shouldn't believe a word that comes out of Davy's mouth. Is he trying to say that despite his kids being all for this marriage that none of four kids could make it to the wedding? None. All four had other more important things to do than watch their dad get married? I don't buy that at all.

Kelly Rutherford's Husband Scares Me

This whole relationship between Kelly Rutherford and her soon to be ex husband Daniel Giersch is a little scary. At one point in this whole process I thought maybe Kelly was overreacting because it seemed like both were normal and people say crazy things when they are trying to get custody of their kids.

Over the past few months though I have come over to Kelly's side and think there is something wrong with Daniel. Like something scary wrong. Like lock the doors and don't tell him where you live wrong. Kelly got a restraining order against Daniel because she says he has been following her, her mother and her nanny and scaring them. The nanny quit because she was so scared of her confrontations with Daniel during children exchanges.

Kelly's mom says Daniel would just show up at places when she was with the kids and keep them from leaving and Kelly says Daniel often shows up when she is out with the kids. If Kelly is telling the truth then this is really scary because this means Daniel isn't doing anything all day except following them around. Another word for that is stalking. If you are spending all day doing that, then you scare me and everyone around you should be scared of you.

It Sounds Like An Episode Of COPS

Bad boys bad boys, what you gonna do, what you gonna do when they come for you? Ahh, I miss COPS. Sunday nights on FOX with COPS and The Simpson's and even back in the day Married With Children. Now that was programming.

Anyway, Randy Quaid and his wive Evi were caught yesterday by police in Marfa, Texas. Marfa is way out in the middle of nowhere west Texas and when the police arrested them, Randy and Evi put up a fight. It was probably a better fight than you really ever got to see on COPS. According to Marfa police, Randy verbally and physically assaulted policemen but the police decided to not press charges. As for Evi, the police had to wrestle her to the ground as she struggled while being arrested.

This is some crazy stuff. According to documents the Quaid's sent to TMZ they paid their hotel bill. Of course they only got the cashiers check on Tuesday so it wasn't like this was all some big misunderstanding. They also hand wrote a statement to TMZ which you can read here.

Ted C Blind Item

No, this isn't the soapy made-up stuff on ABC. This is real-life desperation, babes, Hollywood-style!

There's an aging celeb couple in town who have been pretty damn lucky with their love life, for many years. Sure, they've had their ups and downs (both professionally and personally), but Perka Penis-Player and Schlamm Butt-Wiggle have still managed to stick it out for the tabloid-headlined long haul—miraculously so.

Everybody said they wouldn't make it. But so far, they have—at least for appearance's sake.

Maybe that's because Perka's a broad who's willing to do whatever it takes (in her rather sex-kitten-ish, stereotyped eyes) to hold onto her still-doable guy, despite the fact that his very nice ass has dropped as much as his box-office appeal these days. So what does "whatever it takes" require Perka to engage in? Plastic surgery, perhaps? Oh gawd, that was years ago.

No, now it's time for crafty Ms. Penis-Player to move on the next part of her bod that needs lifting. Can you guess what it is? Ass or eyes, you ask?

Wrong! Her hands! OMG, what will these Frankenstein Beverly Hills plastic surgeons think of next! Is a knee lift next? Don't tell me: It probably already exists.

Nevertheless, it's Perka who's now gone through the recent and incredibly weird process of having her hands lifted, as if that's the part of her anatomy that's gonna get Schlamm's schlong in gear. Maybe it will—I don't know what the hell makes people hot for each other, anymore.

But dare I say it's all a waste of time? You see, as of late, Schlamm's own digits are notorious for touching everything but that Penis-Player he's been shackin' up with for eons.

Why do couples go on like this? Just call it a day and go screw who you like, already!

And It Ain't: Lisa Rinna and Harry Hamlin; Rita Wilson and Tom Hanks; Calista Flockhart and Harrison Ford

Thursday, September 24, 2009

Today's Blind Items

What upper list celebrity parents have only seen their child/children for a total of five days over the past two months. The parents feel like the child/children get in the way too much and our parents have way too much going on in their lives to be concerned with their child/children right now.

Random Photos Part Two

Why not? It's been awhile since CDAN's mascot Ben Affleck was on the top of the photos and he is making a new movie so here you go.
Did you honestly recognize Ashlee Simpson?
Ashanti got a little dressed up to go sightseeing on the Empire State Building. I prefer Zubaz and Crocs myself.
I actually think Anne Hathaway looks great here.
I'm guessing Bai Ling didn't drive over in a Mini-Cooper.
One of the funniest guys around is Bill Maher.
Christina Applegate looks gorgeous.
Courtney Love in a very sweet moment with Oliver Stone. She then probably forgot who he was.
Eric Dane's hair just keeps getting whiter.
Eve looks great.
Elijah Wood looks like he ran 10 miles to pose in this picture with Lisa Love.
Foxy Brown has died her hands red.
An Indonesian baby was born yesterday and almost topped my birth weight. The baby weighed in at almost 20 pounds.
We owe Flava Flav a lot of love for bringing us all the Of Love shows.
Fred Willard at a Sam Kinison tribute.
Much better than yesterday for Jessica Alba.
Even Christina Aguilera looks good.
JC Chasez is just hoping someone remembers his name at this point.
Everyone knows Janet Jackson's name.

Random Photos Part One

Two parts again, although Jane Lynch is definitely worth of the top spot. Watch Glee.
This combination is also top spot worthy. Jamie Lee Curtis and Sigourney Weaver. How about some type of Halloween meets Alien movie. It could star Verne Troyer & Paris Hilton.
It seems like ages ago that Christina Applegate was married to Jonathon Schaech. Here is with Jana Kramer.
Kid Rock enjoying a cigar.
While Mischa Barton enjoys a cigarette. Smoking is alive and well in Hollywood.
Despite the broken wrist, Megan Mullally looks great.
Method Man and I believe that is velvet he is wearing.
Mark Wahlberg & Will Ferrell on the set of their new movie.
"Pssst. Two more drinks and I might not have to wash her feet tonight."
I have to admit that Paula Abdul looks great in this picture.
Judging by the number of e-mails I receive, a surprising number of you are huge fans of Rob Dyrdek.
I just want to sit somewhere and have a few beverages and listen to Rosie Perez talk.
Samaire Armstrong back to her normal hair color. I'm glad.
The best picture I have seen of Shia in a very long time.
Two of your absolute favorites, Stephen Moyer and Anna Paquin.
Steve-O has lost a lot of weight but he looks great. And healthy.
Tom must be standing on a stool.
From L to R there is Allison Beck, Alicia Witt, Topher Grace and the amazing Jennifer Howell.
A classic Woody pose.
The very lovely Zhang Ziyi.


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