Monday, March 16, 2009

I'm Guessing Jessica Simpson Didn't Do Well In School


It has been a very long time since I attended any kind of formal educational institution which required me to study and take an exam. Sure, there is an exam when I get done with traffic school every couple of years, and it seems like the satellite company wants me to learn a new set of channels and the numbers they are associated with every few months, but other than that, not too many tests. But, as my channel surfing indicates, if you care about something you can memorize it.

Saturday night was the last stop on the Jessica Simpson "I'm never doing this again" tour, and despite the fact that she must have played 40 dates, had numerous television appearances and had to sing her songs 30 times while recording them, she still can't remember the words to them. On Saturday night she forgot the words to two of her songs. Her songs. Not cover songs, but her songs. The first time, the audience gave her a break. The second time they booed.

All artists forget the words to their songs at some point. It happens. When you are a group that has hundreds of songs, you are much more likely to forget. However, it rarely happens more than once on a tour because it is embarrassing and so they work hard to fix it. Apparently Jessica Simpson has no such qualms about being embarrassed. This is not the first time, or the second time, or the third time. It has happened almost every night she has played. What I think it comes down to is that she honestly doesn't care about giving a good performance. I have concluded the only thing she cares about is making money. There is no other explanation. She is getting paid regardless of whether the audience likes her or not.

The review from Saturday was that she was lifeless and there wasn't much energy. Don't you think if it was your last show you might want to really put your all into it? Really enjoy it and go out with a bang? A show in front of lots of your friends and family? Not in her world. Oh, and if you think the photo above is just me reusing one from last week. Nope. She wore the exact same outfit again that she has been wearing almost every night. Hopefully if there is another tour, Jessica will think less about herself and her paycheck, and more about all the fans who are paying money to see her perform despite the really hard times.

26 comments:

Jungle007 said...

Wow. So... why doesn't she just do like her little sis and lip-synch?

Y'know, dance a l'il jig at the end? :)

Jungle007 said...
This comment has been removed by the author.
ureallyannoyme said...

All her brain energy went into growing those DDs.

canadachick said...

its all just time away from T--O--N--Y....and isnt' that what defines her....her man ? GAG

Goodgrief said...

Who expects anything better from Jess? She is notorious for having to start over multiple times during her performances . She is probably about the most unprofessional performer out there. She doesn't even try. Of course all she cares about is money. You are just now realizing this?

lmnop123 said...

Well this wouldn't be a problem if people stopped attending her concerts. If she's done it over and over again don't blame her, blame her audience.

If they stop coming she'll show some appreciation and improve her performance.

MontanaMarriott said...

I will never forget when I saw Streisand and throughout the stage she had numerous monitors with the lyrics in case she forgot. I ended up lipsynching while she sang, lol

Anonymous said...

The sad thing about Jess is, because her father decided to manage her career from day one, she's been effectively sabotaged from ever becoming a lasting artist. She has talent but no direction and has no clue how to PERFORM. She lacks confidence and stage presence, and she's never found a vocal "voice" of her own. Had she ever been allowed to stray from Poppa Joe maybe she would have had a chance to be something other than a vapid airhead.

Anonymous said...

@Montana She has paralyzing stage fright and it makes her forget the lyrics. Or so I've heard.

lutefisk said...

What type of audiance is she even getting at this point?
She was theopening act--can she command her own audiance anymore? Just curious.

McDooks said...

That is just weak.

Maja With a J said...

She nees to have a public meltdown, like Britney Spears, fire her dadager, wait a little longer than Britney did, go to Nashville and find a real country songwriting partner, and have a glorious comeback with a real, teary, slide guitar heavy, drawling country album. Just completely cross over.

Pookie said...

she may need to step back for a little bit and re-evaluate what she wants to do w/ her life. her heart doesn't appear to be in music, from all accts. i hope she's able to do this w/o falling completely apart.

califblondy said...

I had to have the words to two songs I sang at a wedding just because I was scared out of my stillettos, not because I didn't know the words better than my own name. Why can't Jessica have a monitor or even somebody in the band, back-up singer, or Papa Joe with flash cards, help her out? Oh ya, because she'd have to care I guess. Where's the picture of her in the daisy dukes and black top? She's looked pregnant.

selenakyle said...

Well I'm amazed she has fans who pay to see her, although I've heard some songs and I have to admit she definitely can SING, unlike Asslee.

And I can handle the low-intelligence part, no problem. We're not all geniuses.

But I keep saying her real break-out will be a Playboy cover/spread.

THAT will be when she really get famous and makes a lot of money and she'd better do it fast before the looks go south.

I'll bet it would be the hottest-selling issue in years.

kimi said...

Califblondy, I saw that outfit too, and second that I think she is pregos. She probably has been obsessed with being pregnant since her little sister was.

Jungle007 said...

@ CanadaChick- Agreed. Sad, but true.. her man makes her who she is.

BadFish- So, if she has stage fight, why the hell is she a performer? I used to get stage fright as well (I was once a singer, not so much now that I'm a parent) And after a bunch of times you kinda get used to it... She is a pretty good singer, but her personality sucks.

HannahPalindrome said...

WOW. I can't believe people pay to see her in concert.

Wack said...

i remember when she was so cool and everyone loved her coz she was sooooo dumb, blonde, holy and married to a hottie.

...


i just feel bad for her now and want to burn my shirt that has that damn tuna quote on it.

Anonymous said...

I wouldn't waste my time paying to see one of her shows even if it was on TV free. Really can't stand the Bimbot.

Unknown said...

The reason she wears this so much is probably because it's her "country music costume". She's gotta look country folks, dangnabbit - don't ye all knowe thayt? Ah-huh.

Oh well, now that this is over I hope the world of country music can take this crushing blow.

TheAM said...

NYC2008 - I dont think they did. This show was in Irvine (Orange County, CA) and my brother was there. He paid to see Rascal Flats (I do not condone my brother's taste in music) and she opened for them. He said they were in the parking lot drinking beer when she was on stage, not many people in the audience, but could hear the booing from where he was. This is just sad.

What ever happened to self respect?? Sad, sad, sad.

jax said...

i think she's knocked up and don't give an Eff anymore.

Unknown said...

pregnant!

Fabulous! said...

you're just now figuring out that she wasn't good at school? of course she wasn't good at school, she's never had to think a day for herself a day in her life. that's what her pepaw is for.


and she can thank him for me now that her career is canned. she HAD talent, but what good is that when she doesn't even care to have a good career?

Judi said...

Anyone who doesn't work their craft on a regular basis (i.e., everyday, even if it's not onstage) is not going to be in any shape to perform. You don't use it, you lose it.

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