Friday, February 17, 2012

Your Turn

Have you ever needed a vacation from your significant other? What is your biggest pet peeve about them?

75 comments:

anita_mark said...

I used to travel a lot for work (weeks at a time). At first it's nice, bed to myself, tv to myself, etc. Then I'd miss him. I squeeze the toothpaste from the middle, he always fixes it. Plus he kills spiders.

My pet peeve - he twitches in his sleep. I don't know if it's restless leg syndrome but I can't sleep when it's going on.

EmEyeKay said...

I LOVED it when my ex went out of town on business, frequently. Week or so at a time. It was FANTASTIC.

I don't like being smothered. And now, I don't have to worry about it at all! :)

RenoBlondee said...

^My husband's a twitcher and thrasher in his sleep too. He's also an ice cruncher. Ick.

When he goes out of town for work occasionally I'm just like what anita said. Thrilled for me time at first, then I miss him terribly.

So I guess the answer is yes, but only briefly, once in a great while.

Ms Cool said...

No.

He is much better at arguing than me. Any peeves I have are minor as Mr. Cool is pretty dang awesome.

Jolene Jolene said...

^Same. On the rare business trip my husband takes, I love not having to watch sports and having complete control of the remote, no judgment if I want to eat sour patch kids for dinner, etc...but after one or two nights of that I miss him and can't wait for him to come home.

timebob said...

my mom used to take "personal vacations" it just alienated her from the family. We resented her as children. But as an adult I could see why she would want a break from it all.

Pogue Mahone said...

My hubby and I always take separate vacations; I go to Europe,Africa, or wherever and he goes to USA. Only once did we vacation together, to Hawaii, but we like different places and he doesn't really even like to travel anyway.

luckylass said...

I need more alone time that the hubs. Luckily he travels enough, and I get it. For all his amazing talents, what bothers me the most, is that he cares so much about what others think in all aspects on our life. The man actually wants me to frost the glass on our porch lights so our house won'y look "trashy". Aye!

Patti said...

My husband hogs up the bed. He is twice my size and we have a full size bed. I think it's time to invest in a king size bed.

mikey said...

Funny you should ask - I am leaving on the 23rd to vacation without my DH. He doesn't like to leave home and makes me miserable when I do make him leave the house. I've come to terms with it - we've been married 25+ years. It's way more fun for me to be alone with friends than with him.

I am slightly envious of you who married well. I married for money and security, and that's all I got.

Nosey said...

I am not married, and I have a semi long distance relationship with my bf, so i get weekly vacations! I am always excited to see him, and definitely miss him when we are not together. My pet peeve: hes a smoker. yuck!

Sue Ellen Mishkey said...

1. No.

2. Biggest pet peeve would be how I have to repeat myself repeatedly because he's lost in thoughts of work. But, that only goes on for the first hour he gets home from work, so it's dealable.

Kimberly said...

1. Lazy.
2. Does not help around the house at all. Does not pick up clothes, dishes, take out trash, do dishes/laundry, mow grass, pick up dog poop when the dog poops on the carpet.. will sit there 4 days before he touches it.
3. Fat. Because of 1. He has dented the couch because he sits on it soo much and broken two chairs with his weight. He has gone from 210 ten years ago to 390pounds and does not care!!
4. Vicious, cruel nasty evil heartless insulting mean sob.
Tells me daily how i cannot do anything right, I half ass everything, etc..
5. Watches slut o vison and girl gone wild constantly. I get pissed off about it because I'm an old fat prude that can't handle women prettier than me.

alyssastinks said...

I liked the vacations from my ex more than I liked being with him. Haha.
I think vacations or mini- vactions, weekends or even an evening apart are very important just to relax and reset.

Kimberly said...

:(

Sue Ellen Mishkey said...

Jesus Kimberly. Why don't you start over?

Momster said...

@Anita, the spider remark made me lol. To me, bug killing is an important trait in a man!

My DH used to travel quite a bit. He was in China for 16-18 days at a time, and that was when our kids were little bitty, and that was tough. Now he only takes the occasional day trip to Houston.

It always amazes me how the little noise at night are magnified x100 when hubby is gone.

@ Patty, invest in the king-size bed. It's the best thing we ever did.

Biggest pet peeve: He is a neat freak. His underwear drawer is neatly divided by brand. You should see his side of the closet vs. mine. Weak pet peeve, but sometimes it's hard to live with!

/novel finished

Kelli said...

not so much a vacation, but I like doing things w/my friends. He hates when I make plans and he is sitting home so he sulks.

My biggest pet peeve w/him is his talking with his mouth full, and he eats like a heathen, food all over his face, I can't stand it. I literally cannot look at him when he eats.

Momster said...

@ Kimberly, you deserve better, dear.

Sue Ellen Mishkey said...

^She sure does!

CridChild said...

Have I wanted one? Yes. Never taken one. He is a gum smacker. Can't stand that. But, if this is the biggest problem, life is good.

EmEyeKay said...

KIMBERLY! Honey, what are you doing?

SusanB said...

Not only do my husband & I live together 24/7/365, we also own a business together. We're only apart 4-5 hours a day at the most. I have to admit I wish he'd need to go out of town occasionally.

My biggest peeve? He'll use that damn remote and constantly change channels over and over and over and over. I finally got a remote of my own, and when it gets to be too much, I put on a channel and tell him if he changes it I'll break his arm. Usually works.

Seachica said...

I get a vacation every few months when I travel for cribbage tournaments. I think it's healthy to have time away and some separate interests - it keeps things more interesting and less predictable.

Biggest pet peeve - hard to say. Last night I was running late so he went ahead and made dinner for both of us. It's hard to come up with pet peeves when your SO steps up so nicely :)

Seachica said...

Oh wait, a pet peeve - he watches MSNBC (which I find biased). Every now and then I'll change it to Fox News just to get a reaction (but shhh....don't tell him that's why I do it. LOL)

SueRH said...

Kimberly,

Run! He's nasty because he's unhappy with himself. That's not going to change unless he gets his act together.

shakey said...

I'd miss my husband if I spent a week without him even though I have enough pet peeves about him to not miss him so much.

Sometimes when he eats, his chomping teeth are quite loud. He eats with his mouth closed.

He's like a "sauvage" - doesn't like to do things with friends or should I say, doesn't like to do anything with friends of mine, doesn't really like me to do things with my friends (even though I let him do whatever he wants, no questions asked because I *trust* him).

Has told me the day I bring home a dog is the day we get divorced. (Nice that our entire relationship hinges on something so petty.)

Whenever I've been out of work (or on sick leave because of anxiety/depression) he's unleashed rather hurtful comments that relate to him "having to pay for everything".

He'll hold a grudge forever. I better stop now, because I'll be here typing for a couple of hours more.

He does have his good qualities, and lately he's really trying to be a kinder person.

Cali Girl said...

My SO worked out of town 4 days a week til now. LOVED it! But he just got transferred back to in-town job and is now here 7 days a week - can you say, holy re-adjustment, Batman?

Love him dearly, but my pet peeve is that he is not a big kissing person. I want full-on necking and making out and he is more into pecking :-( I need to do more training!

shrevemom2 said...

Been married 20 years and he is STILL the loudest snorer I've ever heard. Even his buddies who snore make him put his tent away from them when they go camping.

When the kids were little and I was exhausted, just his breathing irritated me. Thank God the kids got more independent before we killed one another.

RJ said...

Yes. My husband has a very strong and outgoing personality. Thankfully, usually in a very upbeat way. He always has to be doing something. Relaxation, peace and quiet are not his things. I am shy and somewhat withdrawn. (I know that seems a little hard to believe given how much I post, but in real life, I couldn't be so "vocal".) Sometimes I just need a break. I've never actually taken a seperate vacation because luckily his work schedule gives me some much needed quiet time to myself. I would LOVE it if he would go somewhere without me for a few days. Just for the quiet.

And Kimberly, if what you say is true, LEAVE!! Damn if I'd put up with that.

Doc Girl said...

Yes once in a great while I go on a mini vacation without hubby. This April I'm going to NYC for 4 days with my best girlfriend. I also don't hesitate to take a weekend trip with the kids if the notion strikes me. He's fine with it.

I prefer to vacation together, but that's not always possible.

He travels a little bit for work - every 3rd weekend or so he is away on business. We miss each other like crazy when we are apart.

Syko said...

I don't have a significant other, and when I read about those belonging to Kimberly and Shakey, I'm glad.

It would be nice to have a bug killer.

pilly said...

O M G. YES!

When he snores the windows shudder in fear of breaking. Yes I've tried ear plugs and yes I have slept through the alarm

After so many years he has learned not to piss me off and to let me win every now and then at Super Mario

kelly said...

My husband retired at the end of November and, although through almost 30 years of marriage we only argued 2 or 3 times, he is driving me CRAZY and we bicker like my Grandparents used to. All of a sudden he wants to take control of what I have been doing (cooking, paying bills etc) and is critical of everything I do. Thank God I still work. I have started hinting that he may have to take a part time job that does not include arguing with me. Yes, I need a vacation for the first time in our married life together.

Christine! said...

#1, my husband is an excellent Father and would, as Dr Laura puts it, swim across a shark infested ocean to bring me lemonaide...except he would never ask me if I was thirsty- I owuld have to ask him to bring it to me.

My husband is:
a restless sleeper- he is like a dog who dreams and runs in his sleep...and snores. I wear earplugs- problem solved.

isn't romantic in anyway shape or form.

is faultlessly inconsiderate- it would never occur to him to ask me what I want to do with the rest of MY life, when complaining he only has a few epic hunts left in his...

farts like he ate the dead squirrel out on the road- after he stuffed it with rotten garlic and turnips.

was raised by a woman who did everything for him, from removing the foxtails out of his socks...she once asked if I wanted her to show me how to clean up after him- and she was SHOCKED when I asked her why she just didn't SHOW HIM.

I could go on and on...but the point here is I married him and he puts up with ME, so I guess its for life <3

Pogue Mahone said...

My pet peeves? He's an uncultured loser, has poor manners, is uncouth, anal retentive, likes sports,arrogant and condescending,dismisses and demeans me, what he wants always comes first even before the kids,puts his white trash family and redneck hobbies before OUR family,and is just an overall dickhead.

Maja. With a J. said...

It's not so much that I feel like I NEED a break, but we both have our own things that we do and sometimes I go away for a seminar or he goes to a competition and it's kind of nice to have some time apart. We just don't spend all our time together, although I do enjoy hanging out with him. I don't think I laugh as much with anyone as I do with him.

HAVING SAID THAT...he can be quite negative at times and it drives me NUTS. Also, he'll put the duvet between his knees at night, and then he rolls away from me in his sleep, taking it with him. When he is not rolling away while stealing blankets, he pretty much sleeps on top of me. I can't win! *L*

BigMama said...

My husband works shifts so every two weeks I get a 4 day break from him, more or less.

My husband is a great guy, but he is completely useless around the house unless you finally get fed up and start doing whatever it is he said he would do. Then he gets all PO'd and does it. Love him but damn, I have enough to do without having to climb up a ladder to clean gutters.

Bitchette said...

Biggest pet peeves about my husband:

A) He's the whiniest little bitch in the morning. He never gets out of bed without throwing some sort of woe-is-me tantrum first. If he knows we have to be somewhere at a certain time, he won't get up until the very last second, and my heart is in my mouth and I'm stressed out of my brain. If he has to get up for something *he* or his *buddies* want to to do, he jumps up out of bed with no complaints and is super organized. Bugs the hell out of me, especially the childish whining that can verge on a temper tantrum most days.

B) He's totally unmotivated and shows no initiative unless it's something that is urgent, important or meaningful to him.

C) He dresses like he's homeless and takes pride in this. He almost has this 'reverse snobbery' about coming from a working class family, and has some weird need to always dress like he's dirt poor. He sees my wanting to do better than our parents did as some sort of affront, like I'm a snob for wanting more than the very hard, blue-collar lives our parents lived.

Christine! said...

Pogue- instead of uncouth- try SLOTH, thats my favorite.

I wonder what my husband would write about me????

Sometimes I wonder what I would think of me, if I met me...haha.

Great topic!

Christine! said...
This comment has been removed by the author.
MISCH said...

everyone needs some time to themselves...everyone.

Sue Ellen Mishkey said...

When my fella does the dishes he never does them "properly" and there's always something left on them, so instead of making him feel terrible and telling him, I wait until he's not in the kitchen, and under the guise of putting the dishes away, I re-do the dishes and everyone is happy.

Sue Ellen Mishkey said...

Don't tell anyone, ok?

Kimberly said...

Pogue..i didnt know you were my sister in,,law lol

La Pachuquita said...

I love taking vacation alone or with friends, sans sweetie. Last year I went on a 5 day vacation by myself, had a blast, called him every day to say I loved him. I have always been an independent traveler and he knows and accepts that.

Biggest pet peeve: his mother did everything for him, and I told him to stop expecting a fairy to clean up after him or to take care of the logistics in the house.

and he farts in bed, under the covers. eww!

JoElla said...

In fear of jinxing myself.. I really like my husband right now. I love him dearly, but I seriously like him right now!

Hubby used to work nights, and then went to days. That was a culture shock!

After years of me doing the homework/shower time ect.. the kids have learned the difference between Momma being pissed and Momma is just yapping, sooner or later she will hush up LOL
The kids and I (3 of them) are a boisturious bunch and well.. that was hard for the hubby to get used to. He would get stressed out and we would look at him like he had a 2nd head!

His most annoying habit, sometimes he isn't the best listener on the planet.

time away. Usually I zoom off to see grandmama with the trio, and he has to work. On occasion, I can zoom off with girlfriends. Rarely we can go off together.

He recently went to visit family and the kids and I slipped so easily back into our 'dad works nights' routine. It was nice to do the sunday night facia thing without scaring him LOL. His working hours are so crazy, we really didn't miss him until day 2.

Hubby who is more used to being left at home, really missed us. Of course he would miss us, but it was really nice IMO that he realized how much he missed us!

I just thought of another quasi pet peeve.. would it be really naughty of me to list is crazy ass family as a peeve?

JoElla said...

Facial, I meant facial. I do an ugly green thing that scares the kids LOL

angie said...

my husband is 14 years younger than me. Marrying younger isn't all it's cracked up to be...BEEN THERE DONE ALL THAT ALREADY. But on the flip side, this also keeps me young in many ways.

Biggest pet peeve...not putting stuff away & saying the F word too much. I throw that word out now and then, but how many times do you have to use it in a sentence...grrrr.

angie said...

oh and my hubby's family gets on my last one...

Moosefan said...

Pet Peeve-He plays video games for hours and it's usually when there is something I want to watch-of course.
He smokes-like a chimney-quit for about 5 years then started up.
Those don't really matter to me because soon, He is retiring from the military after 21 years of service and we will be moving. It will be awesome to have Him here to fix things, kill the random rogue spider, go to the various sporting events of the little Moosie's and will just be home.
I am thankful for the service He put in, our family is very lucky. Now, its just a new chapter in our book.

feraltart said...

My husband works away a lot. I am very independent, but I would like him home more often.
Pet peeves: he can be lazy around the house. I call him a cyclone, whenever he comes home it looks like a storm threw stuff everywhere. he is nt romantic. When I had my hysterectomy he didn't think to buy me flowers.
I love traveling with him. Have gone away with friends wthout him when he has to work and vice versa, it is not as much fun as when we are together.

kelly said...

Oh yeah, biggest pet peeve - has allowed his family to treat me incredibly poorly and never came to my defense. It got so bad I stopped talking to them all almost 2 years ago, life is peaceful for me, but he still doesn't get why I hate them and keeps telling me they werent so bad (I should win some kind of award my family can't believe some of the shit they have done to me and he says it wasn't so bad) I am starting to see why people get divorced later in life

Brenda Love said...

Some of these gals on here need to get a divorce. I have never been happier in my life.

hammyjam said...

Well right now my bf is another country for six weeks (only 1.5 have passed) and while it was nice at first, I have gotten to the point where I am kind of bored (not to mention completely alone the entire time- I only have one friend to hang out with). Even though he has a million little things that bug me sometimes, I obviously don't care that much and just want him back :(

Amy in MI said...

This is about my nice ex. He snores super loud and I'm a light sleeper. Earplugs didn't work. He never cleans te house. Espexcially the toilet. When I stop over to see my dog I usually do it for him. And he grunts. Like whe. He is sitting its almost like his diaphragm is compressed and he holds his breath for like 3 seconds then grunts it out. Horrible to see a movie w him!

Del Riser said...

I miss my husband a lot when he goes on his yearly back home golf trip.

I don't mind being alone though. He works from 2 pm to 11:30 at night, so I have lots of alone time, me and the dog.

He does the cooking, so I ignore most anything else, except thinking that a fart in the bed must be released by fluttering the covers.

Danielle said...

Wow.. I was just gonna say that I can't stand the toothpaste all over the sink, walls, and mirror. He just about gargles it all over and doesn't bend over AT ALL when he spits it into the sink. This morning I told him he's about one step above flinging his own poo. I guess all that seems alittle petty now though lol

Maja. With a J. said...

At least he doesn't try to trap you under said covers, Del!


I once made the mistake of asking my husband what a Ducth Oven is.

Maja. With a J. said...

DUTCH.

Jolene Jolene said...

Hahahaha Brenda Love. I was thinking the same thing but I didn't want anyone to think I'm rubbing it in. I am sad that some people are in such terrible relationships. My husband isn't perfect and we have little things that annoy each other, of course, but I'm blissfully happy. We're madly in love, but I didn't marry only for love. I think that's where a lot of people have issues. My mom always made me promise her that I'd marry a man as good as my father. And that's why I married my husband. For love, but also because of the man he is and the father I know he'll be.

Jolene Jolene said...
This comment has been removed by the author.
Jolene Jolene said...

HAHAHA Maja with a J.

HAHAHAHAHAHAHA. Your husband and my husband would get along.

Robin the Mad Photographer said...

Kimberley, do we need to take up a collection so you can file for divorce? (You, too, Shakey.) This is the kind of thing that makes me very, very glad I never got married, because I've always been afraid I'd end up w/someone who only pretended they loved me, but really just wanted someone "useful" around to do all the dirty work. (I could get into my bad self-esteem issues, but this isn't really the place for it.)

La Pachuquita said...

I have made it clear to my sweetie that I don't need him to buy me a diamond ring or to take care of me. I can do those myself very well, thank you very much.

I am with him because its a choice, one I am glad I made. I can also make a different choice if I am unhappy. I am not afraid of being alone, and I think that scares the crap out of him knowing that I am not clinging on to him for dear life.

Del Riser said...

@Maja With a J., ooooh, that would be torturous!!!!

Aside from being an 8 year old about farts, my husband is almost perfect...for me.

To Kimberly and Shakey, please leave these men. There is a better life waiting for you without them. It may be harder, but it will be better.

La Pachuquita said...

If I ever win the lottery, I will start a legal fund to help women get out of bad marriages. Many women in my family could have used it, sparing themselves, their kids, and everyone around them.

I will call it "Quit that Zero, Be Your Own Hero" Fund!

Dani said...

Tami? Is that you? ;)

Henriette said...

Hubs is a typical absentminded professor. He seriously forgets everything, but can recite obscure Tibetan texts. It doesn't bother me anymore though. He is very sweet.

I use to be a big loner, but I miss the hubs. I took a vacation without him and just texted/called him constantly.

mygeorgie said...

OMG, this is the best Saturday morning read eva! I had to get a fresh cup of coffee half way thru..hilarious!

Hubby eats with a fork. Only a fork. I set out a knife every night & no matter what we're having, he only pics up the damn fork. Caveman style-grasp too. It's one step above eating KD out of the pot. Half the time I zone out at meals & pretend he's not there. (& George Clooney is in his place)

I think if you can afford to, a vaca every year apart is extremely healthy.

mygeorgie said...

Obviously it's mostly chics on here, or the few men on CDaN are married to perfect women (like ourselves) ;)

EmEyeKay said...

@mygeorgie, I just refilled my coffee, too!

It's nice to read that some people are happily married - I do wonder what that's like, every now and then, never had it myself. I've tried but learned I'd really rather be on my own. Both times, after I left, I felt huge relief.

shakey said...

I think I'll take a page out of mygeorgie's book - I'll pretend George Clooney is sitting at the table beside me. Who knows, perhaps George has even worse qualities than most men. ;)

I forget who said it above about the husband swimming across shark-infested waters for her - I have to say that is one of my husband's redeeming qualities. Yes, he's an ass, and I have thought of leaving many times, but you can't help who you fall in love with. And he can make me laugh like no other.

And I've recently started going out after work on Fridays. If he can do his thing, I can do mine.

Lelaina Pierce said...

Why, yes. This is how my girls weekends began. We used to do them a few times a year but sadly now with the abundance of little ones, there isn't much time anymore. Sigh. It's good to have alone time. I encourage him to do the same but he's a workaholic, so it's difficult. When he travels, at first I love it for TV control, dogs can sleep in the bed, and I get SO much accomplished. (@ Maja my husband did the same with the covers, so now he uses the duvet & I have a comforter and yes it's ridiculous ;)).

My biggest pet peeve is how stubborn he is. He is incredibly intelligent & well read, so has the tendency to think he is correct about everything.

lunabelle said...

Wow, this is a fascinating thread.

My husband is perfect. He is a Genius, a workaholic, gourmet cook, cleans when he is cranky, well read, loces Shakespeare and the best father i have ever met. However, i am not sure he loves me.
It is a long complicated story but he forgets about me. Forgets to ask how my day was, to talk to me, to tell me about his day when I ask. He isn't all that sexual and is cery stressed about work/life but will never talk to me about anything.
I miss the man i fell in love with. I am sure he misses the woman he fell in love with as i am quite different now, for reasons i cannot control, than i was then.
We have amazing kids and I live for them. Soon i will be able to persue other interests outside mothering....i wonder what will happen to our marriage then?
There is no abuse or anger just isolation and kind indifference. When i tell him he says he will "change" and gets so upset because he does love me and wants me to be happy. I just don't think he is in love with me.
I love him and want him to be happy too.....what do i do??
Oh and then there is family. God, too much family.