Friday, March 16, 2012

Ted C Blind Item

Happy Friday, sexy Awful readers! Before you go off and do all those naughty things you have planned for the weekend (and I know you’re going to be up to no good), let me introduce you to pretty and pure Billy Bend-Over.
He’s got rosy cheeks, luscious locks and a bubble butt to boot—all the perfect makings of a movie star, no? Especially with his "aw, shucks" 'tude that America loves. But Bill has a little secret about how he got to the top…
By getting on bottom! We’ll get to that in one sec though.
See, Billy is no stranger to gay rumors. Homolicious rumors have followed him during his time in the limelight (which big-screen star worth his box office hasn’t had his sexuality questioned?), but the thing is…
Billy is straight. Or so say his pals.
But that never stopped Billy from doing whatever he needed to do to land a role. You didn’t think casting couch biz was exclusively for gals like Portia Vajazzle and Bernadine Couch-Butt, did ya?
Nope! Billy’s toosh is quite cozy with those par-tick couches. Or beds. Or wherever it may be that he needs to perform certain, uh, “auditions” to prove exactly how much he wants a role.
Like he did to land his most iconic big-screen role, when he bedded the director—who was very much a man—to score the gig.
Wonder if it was worth it. And I wonder if it’d be worth it if his fans found out…or worse, his significant other, future 2.5 kiddos and that picket friggin’ fence he so cherishes.
AND IT AIN’T: Peter Facinelli, Alex Pettyfer, Jon Hamm

72 comments:

canadian_gurl said...

Ryan Gosling?

EmEyeKay said...

Ted's style makes me want to stab myself with a fork.

"Par-tick". *makes disgusted noise*

ItsAJ said...

LOL @ EmEyeKay. You should watch one of his videos... He talks like he writes, but with less confusion.

jza1218 said...
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jza1218 said...

Chris Hemsworth with Kenneth Branaugh for Thor?

Terri said...

Channing Tatum?

EmEyeKay said...

I'd like to thank whomever came up with "stab myself with a fork". It's so... perfect.

(whomever... whoever? Back to Strunk & White)

FS said...

better not be Andrew Garfield and his luscious hair.

david91 said...

channing tatum and steven soderbergh?

Unknown said...

Chris Hemsworth

EmEyeKay said...

The Hemsworth (sp?) with the longer hair?

cocktailhour said...

EmEyeKay, I so agree with you! But he came up with Goopy's original, "Fishsticks" so he deserves some credit. Btw, I got hooked on this site a few weeks ago and now can't get enough with all the Himmmm reveals. Juicy!

Lizzie Bow said...

I'm thinking it's ur man Matthew Mcsomething

BigMama said...

ok, what movie is coming out soon that is about to garner alot of intrest from the Twihard crowd? Hunger Games? Well, there you have it. All of Ted's blinds will now revolve around the cast of those movies. I am not saying they aren't correct, but he does like to stay relevant as much as possible.

Christina said...

I'm thinking Hemsworth too.

chopchop said...

For some reason this makes me think Zac Efron. He's always had gay rumors about him but many of us (Enty included) have actually thought he's straight. I'm thinking Zac with Kenny Ortega being the director he slept with to land the High School Musical role. Maybe I'm way off ... was Zac underage when he got that role? And I guess it wasn't technically "big-screen". And Zac probably already has a BV nickname. In short, ignore my rantings because I'm full of shit.

Christina said...

@BigMama,
The Avengers is coming out so that could point to Hemsworth. However, it can't be for that movie since s Whedon is directing. Please no dirt on Whedon if there is any. I love him and will forever be grateful for Buffy and Firefly.

Derreck said...

i really do like the Andrew Garfield guess. Never heard of either of the Hemsworths having gay rumors.

RenoBlondee said...

My first thought was a Hemsworth as well.

Robert said...

Why not stab Ted C. with the fork?

The Missus said...

I'm on team Channing Tatum.

Sean said...

This only narrows it down to every actor in Hollywood.

MyMamasChild said...

The constant mention of the word "couch" got me thinking Tom Cruise.

selectivesoul said...

I'm team Hensworth on this one.

DontRainOnMyPrada said...

I immediately thought of Bradley Cooper, since he's constantly rumored to be gay, but Himmm insisted he's straight.

Ja- said...
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RJ said...

@Christina, I like Whedon's work, too (I'm a Buffy freak!), but I've serious doubts as to his character. I think he's a classic former "nerd" who struck out with the popular girls in high school and now really enjoys tearing down the pretty girls now that he's in a position of power over them. Charisma Carpenter said in an interview once that he pretty much tormented all the actress on his shows about constantly losing weight and that she was basically forced out of Angel after getting pregnant and gaining weight. Based on the fact that lots of young actresses would start his show at a healthy weight and then after a season or two, they looked like a walking Charms blow pop, I believe her. Look how skinny SMG got, and how extremely thin most of the women on his shows were or became.

Katja said...

@chopchop lol! I feel like that all the time :)

nolachickee said...

I love the way Ted talks/writes. Guess I'm in the minority on that, though.

Don't know who this is, but I'm sorry. If you let a man have butt sex with you (thanks, Snooki) then you are gay. Don't care if it's "just for work". Gay. Just admit it.

EmEyeKay said...

@Robert, I wouldn't assault anyone other than myself with a fork.

ummidk said...

i think andrew garfield has too much acting talent to need to resort to this. i think a stronger possibility would be one of the "chest" actors like the hemsworth bros or even chris evans.

PS said...

I think it's Kellan Lutz.

BigMama said...

@Christina - I'm with ya girly. No Joss cracks. I kinda have a thing for him anyway. He practically re-wrote teen vernacular, it's still horrible but at least it's funny.

Christina said...

@RJ,
I can see where you are coming from and you can definitely see the weight loss of all the actresses throughout the seasons. I adore SMG, so I'm glad that she's healthier now especially after having her daughter.

Christina said...

@BigMama,
lol,I still catch myself saying something gives me "the wiggins"

Rose said...

Is this the only shtick Ted has? I only read what is posted here, I gave him up years ago because every blind he posted was about some guy in Hollywood who is gay.

canadian_gurl said...

The reason I guessed RG, is because he has a decent pubic image, everybody loves him right now, his career is one fire. He recently said he wants to settle down and start a family someday. (Hopefully not with Eva Mendes) And he's said to be straight. Just a guess.

canadian_gurl said...

I meant public image, lol ;P

leemonada76 said...

Owen Wilson

Beth said...

I'm inclined to go with the elder Hemsworth, Thor. This sounds like he is in a long-term relationship that's going (gone) somewhere, and his wife his pregnant.

leemonada76 said...

Owen Wilson

jza1218 said...

Jeremy Renner for the Bourne movies?

theyareangry said...

Rainn Wilson!

Mila said...

Ryan Gosling? Kissing the director of Drive in public and everything?

crila16 said...

I don't really care. Clark Cable did the same thing back in the day...and he was 100% straight. The things money and ego make you do.

chopchop said...

Where's our old buddy Ryan guessing "George Wendt"??? And where's "looserdude" too? I haven't seen him around in ages. :-(

Sis said...

What...not my beloved Clark Gable too????

Arch Enemy said...

Hemsworth...after which he was mighty mighty Thor in more ways than one.

Unknown said...

As much as I love blind items, I hate when they don't give you enough clues to figure it out, knowing it won't be revealed. There's no reference to a time period. This could be about an actor now, or 20 years ago. I don't remember hearing gay rumors about hemsworth. The blind does say this actor has been plagued by them. I thought Taylor Lautner, but he has no significant other at this time. Then I thought Tom Cruise as a possibility it's an older blind. He has 2 grown kids and one young (2.5) and has faced gay rumors his whole career. But the the whole his friends think he's straight part made me think it's not in reference to him because I think his sexuality may not be such a big secret in Hollywood. Then I started to think of actors who worked with openly gay directors. Matthew M. and Colin Farrel both had big roles early in their careers in Joel Shumacher films. Bryan Singer directed X-men and the Superman remake. And I believe Rob Marshall is gay and has directed a few big musicals. Kellan Lutz I'd say is out because his first big role was a small supporting role (hardly iconic) in twilight which was directed by a woman. So I'm wondering if that's the direction to look in. Maybe Jake G.? He's had the gay rumors but still widely believed to be straight. His first move was Donnie Darko, not exactly a huge hit, but very well reviewed and considered by many to be a cult classic that put Jake on the map. It was directed by the (IMHO very hot) director Richard Kelly, who I don't know if he's gay or straight, but don't see mentions of a wife or gf when I google him.

Unknown said...

A second guess. James Franco. Had the gay rumors, has a great bubble butt (like Jake G.) and his first big role (after Freaks and Geeks)was playing Hollywood "icon" James Dean. A role for which he got award nominations and great reviews. It was directed by a man who will be turning 78 this year but the film was released 11 years ago. So probably filmed 12 years ago. which would casting may have been as long as 13 years ago. making the director around 65 at the time. A stretch, but could happen.

Mary said...

This just screams Channing Tatum to me. There's always been little whispers about what else he did besides strip, back in the day.

Liz said...

It can't be James Franco. He is strongly rumored to bs Crotch Uh-Lastic. James doesn't really make it much of a secret that he's into guys.

Lisa B. said...

I never get Ted blinds, (or any other blinds for that matter!) but did any one else notice that there are double letters in all the aint's?
That's all I got.

Unknown said...

I didn't think of Channing Tatum. I could see it, but he hasn't been hard hit by the gay rumors like Jake G. has for example. I do remeber when CT was first breaking into the business (still on his way up in that Amanda Bynes movie) there were stories floating around that people who went to college with him were saying he was bi because he experimented in college quite a bit. But those rumors were years ago and seemed to have dies out. I haven't really heard too many gay rumors about him since then. Plus Jake G. Does do the "modest" act in interviews. But I really don't know who to guess because this blind could apply to many guys within the last 20 years. If we had some kind of time frame it might help. Franco is long rumored to be gay, and doesn't go out of his way to deny or hide it. You don't hear about him dating (men or women) and you don't see him bringing dates on the red carpet) He just always is alone. If he wanted to hide it he'd get a "beard" but he doesn't do the Anderson Cooper thing either (not come out and tell the world, but very publicly lives a gay life) So Franco just is an enigma in that regard to me.

Mooshki said...

If it isn't Channing Tatum, it might as well be.

Unknown said...

"rosy cheeks" Tatum doesn't have. "Luscious locks" He usually keeps his hair shaved or very, very short. So I don't think CT is the one here. But, Zac Efron does fit. Rosy cheeks, his haircut inspired many and it was big news when he cut it off. The big screen movie, "Hair Spray" where the charatcer of Link Larkin was sort of an "icon" and the movie was directed by openly gay Adam Shankman. the "was it worth it?" reference could be because the film was supposed to be a big hit, but ultimately bombed at the box office.
A second possibility, if this blind refers to a bit further back, Tom Cruise, who I always thought is "toothy tile" because his big, toothy smile has always been one of his trademark features. The gay rumors are there and always have been, and his break out role in Risky Business (directed by a male) featured the "Iconic" scene where he dances around in his tighty whities. Now I can't even tell which it is because it fits both lol

Liz said...

The rumors/guesses are that:
Tom Cruise is Fey Oiled Tush
Zac Efron is Jackie Bouffant
Anyway, even if the rumors/guesses are wrong, Crusie and Efron already have a vice moniker.

Spike Ghost said...

I'm petty sure Channing Tatum is openly bisexual, so it could be him, but the text doesn't seem to describe him. I'm guessing either Zac Efron or Andrew Garfield.

Kid Sis said...

This site's search area on the right is helpful if you really want to decipher Ted. http://www.blinditemsexposed.com/

Or you can just go with the usual CDaN translation: "Everybody's gay gay gay!!!! EVERYBODY!!!"

Unknown said...

Makes me think of Andres Shue.

Unknown said...

That's Andrew Shue

Unknown said...

Andrew Shue played Billy on Melrose Place, but have never had an iconic big screen role.

Adorkable said...

I don't know why but the person that came to mind when I read this was Brandon Routh from Superman Returns.

JustAGirl said...

The guy that played Tim Riggins...��Taylor Kitsch

Hmax17 said...

I say Jake G in Brokeback Mountain with Ang Lee

samantha said...

The "lush locks" rules out Channing Tatum--he barely has hair, it's shaved so short.

I like the Brandon Routh guess. There were lots of rumors about him hooking up with Bryan Singer, back when Superman Returns came out. The only problem is, has he really "gotten to the top"? His career has kind of bottomed out (no pun intended).

It has to be someone who's more successful.

christinezinken said...
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Jaime said...

Thor (aka Chris hemsworth) is my guess.
He's married. He has some luscious locks I guess...

I've read Ted for years. @ememkay-I totally hear you and your pain. He was my first gossip blind discovery site in my early 20's I used to try and figure them out while bored at work. So I've stuck with Ted, but he is frustrating to say the least. When I found Enty my dirty little vice (gossip blind/blog detective work) was made complete. ;-)

April said...
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UNOG News said...

Movie Thor
Director Kenneth Branagh
Actor Chris Hemsworth

Repeats worth worth in the text (Hemsworth)
Branagh directored very much ado nothing= very much a man

UNOG News said...

Picket friggin fence is the iconic picket fence of Neighbours, the Australian TV show where he started as an actor.

TheOutmarchesOfMadness said...

I think it's Jamie Bell