In a 911 call to police reporting that paps were following him, Justin Bieber referred to himself as Justin Johnson. Think about this for a second. You are a celebrity and are calling to say there are paps following you on the highway and making it unsafe. So, naturally the dispatcher on the other end of the call is going to wonder who is so famous they are being pursued all over the highway and you say Justin Johnson. At that point the dispatcher is going to take you way less seriously because can you think of anyone named Justin Johnson who would be followed? No. I don't get it. Is he ashamed to be a Bieber? Does he like Justin Johnson because it makes him sound like Jack Johnson and people will take his music more seriously. Does he wish he had a big Johnson? OK, maybe that is going too far. You know when he got pulled over for going 100 and endangering all the people around him? Do you think maybe if he had gone 65 which is the speed limit, the paps would have also gone 65? I still don't get why they were following him so aggressively and why he was trying to shake them. Yeah, are you thinking what I'm thinking? He was late for a nooner. It was about 10:45 and with traffic and parking. Yeah, I could see him rolling into a hotel a little before noon. Get a room. Practice talking deeper. Yeah, that makes sense to me. A nooner with someone not named Selena Gomez.